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(Some Guy)   Funeral home offers free burial to anyone who pledges to drive drunk on New Year's Eve, then gets killed as a result   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
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4796 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2001 at 1:04 AM (18 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

40 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-12-29 1:05:11 AM  
Hey, man, Whatever works!
2001-12-29 1:05:35 AM  
Wow... I never win anything, I wonder if I could win this...
2001-12-29 1:05:53 AM  
Is that a double-dog dare?
2001-12-29 1:07:34 AM  
How do you respond to something this truly stupid? Oh, wait, I just did.
2001-12-29 1:08:16 AM  
How does a funeral home get killed? This is probably the most confusing headline ever.
2001-12-29 1:08:54 AM  
Time to put the "fun" back in funeral
2001-12-29 1:09:17 AM  
Uh, what if the drunk driver who pledges kills a family or other innocent person? Wouldn't the funeral home be liable for supporting such a pledge? Cause of effect? They laid out the rules, the "drunk" followed the rules, so they should be liable?
2001-12-29 1:09:33 AM  
This is just tacky.
2001-12-29 1:11:20 AM  
Somehow I don't think their little "waiver" is going to protect them.
2001-12-29 1:12:03 AM  
Where do I sign up?
2001-12-29 1:12:42 AM  
i betcha a bunch of suicide people sign up
2001-12-29 1:14:14 AM  
What about suicide? If a person wants to die and have a funeral home pay for it, this sounds like the perfect vehicle. The home picks up the $5000 bill for the expenses, the family doesn't have to pay, and collects whatever benefits the recently dead's plan pays out.
2001-12-29 1:14:25 AM  
What's wrong with this?
Just because the person signs up doesn't mean they're necessarily going to go out and drive drunk. It just means that if they do, and they're killed as a result, they get a full funeral free.
It's not intended to get people signed up, it's intended to get people to think twice.
2001-12-29 1:16:03 AM  
Ok, I will say it and make it official:

"This is wrong on so many levels."
2001-12-29 1:32:52 AM  
So uh, don't the police then just tail everyone who signs up?

And isn't this just free funeral insurance?
2001-12-29 1:47:37 AM  
Yeah, ummm...I don't drive drunk, but I'd sign up anyway just in case I get killed.

Know what would be funny? seeing the fight afterwards - where the family insists he was driving drunk, while the cops and funeral home try to prove he was sober.

It's Bizarro-Funeral!
2001-12-29 1:51:07 AM  
my only holiday advice is this...

if you see the blue rollers, the po-po is coming to take your freedom. this is especially important if you have been drinking. now, if you see the blue lights remember that flight is your only option. pigs have contempt for the drunk that just pulls over, make them chase you through a neighborhood, preferably one with a "caution: children at play" sign. that whole kids playing this is complete bullshiat, just another cop tactic to get you to slow down to 80.

once you've got the cop following you, drive faster. only by getting home and off the streets as soon as possible can you save lives. it is logical, the more time you spend driving drunk the more dangerous you are. ok, let's imagine for a second i have some sort of neat math equation... sadly i don't, all the same, work with me here. T is the amount of time you are on the road. S is the speed you are travelling. D is the distance, and D is also the number of drinks you had. so by squaring the D you get deeez nutzz. (sup snoop, you my nubian) ok back to math... if you take the T x S/ DD you get danger, pure and simple. to decrease danger, one must simply increase S to decrease T, thus making the entire equation much safer and more desireable.

so, let's review... 1) i'm drunk... 2) i walked to the bar... 3) i walked home... 4) the only person in danger was me- from the errant drunk driver- as i have no 2,000 lbs of glass and steel protecting me.

so in closing, it is much safer to drink and drive as a car offers some protection.

thank you.
2001-12-29 2:01:47 AM  
Ok. I'm writing from LA holding cell. I've met the requirements.

Gimme my prize.
2001-12-29 2:05:37 AM  
Dammit where were these jaick-offz two years ago. I know I saw god that night that tree jumped in my way, and I have defiantly got Satan living down the street.
(Please note: This is reference to the Olympic Committee allowing Satan to play in the Olympics.).
2001-12-29 2:11:38 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-29 2:27:43 AM  
This headline sucks. "Then gets killed?"
2001-12-29 2:33:13 AM  
Drive safe,they're in no hurry to get you.
2001-12-29 2:55:31 AM  
"and those warts on your dick arent gonna go away, lest you start using topical cream every day."
2001-12-29 2:55:32 AM  
Seems a great idea to me. Nice to see that someone is using advertising for public good, instead of just a couple bucks.
2001-12-29 3:41:57 AM  
Well, now we can look forward to a bunch of terrorists getting plastered and driving all over the road. Not only do they go to heaven but they get a free funeral too.
2001-12-29 4:05:34 AM  
grar, nm.. to tired.. pics never work for me anyways.. especailly ones at codetroop

night everyone
2001-12-29 7:16:00 AM  
StephenV: Who said that they'd be going to heaven? I have to assume that if you get drunk, kill yourself and possible kill/injure others God's not going to smile and let you in.
2001-12-29 7:39:38 AM  
Hey Pokey, How's the weed?
2001-12-29 8:01:30 AM  
Couldn't you get a ticket for getting killed while driving drunk?
2001-12-29 8:13:29 AM  
Actually I prefer that poster that's in some of the rest areas along the Ohio Turnpike. Shows a picture of a sympathy card, and it says "This message made possible by a drunk driver" or something like that.
2001-12-29 9:53:36 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
Vice President Magic Bong is not please with this.
2001-12-29 9:54:17 AM  
...nor does he intend to type pleased correctly.
2001-12-29 11:26:58 AM  

Anyone who takes these people up on their offer deserves to be locked up and kept away from society where he/she can no longer do harm.

BTW, did anyone else get redirected when they clicked the link?
2001-12-29 1:33:50 PM
2001-12-29 2:47:23 PM  
Link is broken. Woe is us.
2001-12-29 2:48:06 PM  
I'll offer a free funeral to anyone who completely fails to get the point and then gets eaten by a grue as a result.
2001-12-29 4:50:38 PM  
Here is a corrected link
2001-12-29 7:16:19 PM  
This is a fad that has caught on pretty much everywhere. Three or four F. homes that I've heard of here in WI
2001-12-29 10:11:10 PM  
thanks, Bessame, hadn't been able to find it.
2001-12-30 5:24:56 AM  
TheGrue, don't make me get my portable 1000W search light out!
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