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(   Moose rescuers crash helicopter and die. Moose survives.   ( divider line
    More: Ironic  
•       •       •

3775 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Dec 2001 at 9:15 AM (18 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

54 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-12-28 9:18:19 AM  
Fark loves a good moose story I guess.
2001-12-28 9:20:22 AM  
"...Hey Rocky, what me crash a helicopter"
2001-12-28 9:20:56 AM  
farkin PETA is pissed. They almost killed the moose.
2001-12-28 9:21:09 AM  
Hee hee. It's funny because it happened to someone else.
2001-12-28 9:22:10 AM  
I'm sure there's a good jihad joke in here somewhere.
2001-12-28 9:24:30 AM  
reasonable use of the ironic tag, bra-farking-vo

2001-12-28 9:27:10 AM  
reminds me of a Woody Allen short story:

The Moose

I was hunting up-state New York and I shot a moose. I strap him on to the fender of my car and I'm driving home along the West Side highway. What I didn't realize was that the bullet did not penetrate the moose. It just creased his scalp, knocking him unconscious. So I'm driving through the Holland Tunnel, and the moose woke up. Now I'm driving with a live moose on my fender ... and the moose is signalling a turn. And there's a law in New York State against driving with a conscious moose on your fender Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. I'm very panicky ... and then it hits me. Some friends of mine are having a costume party. I'll go, I'll take the moose. I'll ditch him at the party. It won't be my responsibility. So I drive up to the party. I knock on the door. The moose is next to me. My host comes to the door. I say, "Hello ... you know the Solomons?" We enter. The moose mingles ... did very well ... scored. Some guy was trying to sell him insurance for an hour and a half. Twelve o'clock comes, they give out prizes for the best costume of the night. First prize goes ... to the Berkowitzes, a married couple dressed as a moose. The moose comes in second. The moose is furious! He and the Berkowitzes lock antlers in the living room. They knock each other unconscious. Now I figure here's my chance. I grab the moose, strap him to my fender and shoot back to the woods. But I got the Berkowitzes. I'm driving along with two Jewish people on my fender ... and there's a law in New York State ... Tuesdays, Thursdays and especially Saturdays. The following morning, the Berkowitzes wake up in the woods in a moose-suit. Mr Berkowitz is shot, stuffed, and mounted at the New York Athletic Club - and the joke is on them, `cause it's restricted.
(Note: The New York Athletic Club's laws ban Jews)
2001-12-28 9:28:08 AM  
If moose were meant to fly...
2001-12-28 9:35:04 AM  
The Moose have already won...
2001-12-28 9:35:32 AM  
...ha ha...oh God....ha ha ha...I love Woody Allen. I do.
2001-12-28 9:38:53 AM  
Mmmm.. mooooooose

[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-28 9:39:44 AM  
Hey Rat
How bout a short posting?
2001-12-28 9:41:50 AM  
All your moose belong to us.
2001-12-28 9:42:09 AM  
The Saudi Ambassador to the U.N. has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets his American counterpart.

They shake hands and as they walk the Saudi says, "You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America".

The American says "Well your Excellency, anything I can do to help you I will do."

The Saudi whispers "My son watches this show 'Star Trek' and in it there are Russians and Blacks and Asians, but never any Arabs. He is very upset. He doesn't understand why there never are any Arabs in Star Trek."

The American laughs, leans over and says "That's because it takes place in the future."
2001-12-28 9:42:35 AM  

Ever had moose head?
2001-12-28 9:43:34 AM  
Puckfitt- I am afraid my colon would not stretch that wide.
2001-12-28 9:47:02 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

2001-12-28 9:48:04 AM  
A moose bit my sister once.
2001-12-28 9:48:23 AM  
Puckfitt: Yep. My grandfather used to work for a trucking company, and cases of it used to "appear" in my basement when I was a kid -- my dad used to drink Moosehead and Heineken.
2001-12-28 9:49:06 AM  
I think the moose was trained in a al-Qaida camp on how to hijack helicopters and take em' down. Did anyone check that mooses's passport?
2001-12-28 9:49:46 AM  
Never had moose head either but I've had some pretty grizzly pussy.
2001-12-28 9:50:13 AM  

[image from too old to be available]

2001-12-28 9:50:18 AM  
"When it comes to humility, I am the greatest." Bullwinkle J. Moose

Where in the Hell did the "J" come from?
2001-12-28 9:55:27 AM  
Good God, Rat. Get a life. The moose article was funnier than your joke.
2001-12-28 9:56:24 AM  
"The crew catches the moose by throwing nets over the animals from the air. One member jumps on the animals, blindfolds and hobbles them, then wraps them in large bags."

How did they find out my dating ritual?
2001-12-28 9:57:38 AM  
heya PuckFitt

long joke
2001-12-28 10:01:22 AM  
Rat: Don't listen to them. Woody rocks.
2001-12-28 10:04:42 AM  
Rat - What can I say. Had to wait for someone to bite. But I thought it was still funny.

Phxtony - There was a space between moose and head...intentionally...still trying to wake up?
2001-12-28 10:04:42 AM  
hmmm, this you?

[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-28 10:05:08 AM  
Yo, Fb- -- we need a picture of the beer-drinking pig.
2001-12-28 10:06:06 AM  
Puckfitt: Aaaah.. spilled most of my coffee this morning, the brain is only running on 2 cylinders.
2001-12-28 10:06:31 AM  
Well Woody Allen is a little funnier than, and a little less annoying than Carrot Top.
2001-12-28 10:09:22 AM  
Actually Rat, that does look a little like me. But you need more Packer stuff, more empty beer cans on the floor, Im fatter than that, and I always watch tv in my undies.

OH, and there should be a velvet Elvis on the wall behind my recliner.
2001-12-28 10:15:39 AM  
Rat - I get it now. Your posting was a long joke. Sorry Should I go back and read it?
2001-12-28 10:16:18 AM  
Scarneck: but Carrot Top never molested young girls, or screwed up Korean chicks named Soon-Yi.
2001-12-28 10:19:13 AM  
I don't think Carrot Top has the genitalia to screw anyone.
2001-12-28 10:19:14 AM  
Woody Allen, Carrot Top, Marylin Manson, and Michael Jackson, are all pretty similar in their sexual practices, I believe.
2001-12-28 10:25:02 AM  

truce declared in Farkistan

Scarneck declared 'OK kinda guy due to him being a GB Packer fan'

BigPeeler still my hero

2001-12-28 10:35:33 AM  
This sounds like a job for UNDERDOG LADY!!!!!
[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-28 11:28:20 AM  
Ok Rat, truce.

***damn im getting soft****
2001-12-28 11:48:13 AM  
Hey robbiefal what the hec is wrong with johnstons eye on your pick it looks like its melting off.
2001-12-28 11:51:15 AM  
why didn't they just shoot the moose? why risk your life in icy weather to move a moose? it should have a "farked up priorities" tag
2001-12-28 12:15:00 PM  
Farkin' right on! It's about time someone got the "irony" tag right.
2001-12-28 12:32:12 PM  
Damn! Are moose an endangered species that people need to risk life and limb to save thier asses. What is up with humanity?
2001-12-28 12:52:59 PM  
Not exactly like rain on your wedding day, but definitely ironic. **Note: that is the last time I'll mention an Alanis Morissette lyric in a thread. I promise.
2001-12-28 1:06:43 PM  
It's nature's way of saying, "I'm pissed off and I'm not gonna take it any more."
2001-12-28 2:09:10 PM  
Misleading tag!!!

"The chopper was not transporting a moose at the time of the accident."

Damn almost ironic, dontcha think??
2001-12-28 2:13:25 PM  
After what, 40 damn posts, finally Vman says it. There was no moose at the time of the accident. Should we just assume that every goddamn headline is misleading from now on?
2001-12-28 4:51:20 PM  
Yes, every headline is misleading. It's the only way to get them posted.
2001-12-28 5:00:44 PM  
Everyone else must have moosed it when they read it the first time. Aintlers like it was obvimoose. I just Doe'nt belive it.

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