Skip to content
Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(YouTube)   Are you a sitzpinkler? If so you are Destroying America, you godless heathen. Don't laugh--it's the in the Bible (mildly Not safe for work)   (youtube.com) divider line
37
    More: Dumbass  
•       •       •

2790 clicks; posted to Video » on 24 Sep 2014 at 7:07 PM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



37 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
InterruptingQuirk
2014-09-24 4:45:23 PM  
Brought to you by Scotchguard © ™ ®
 
Snapper Carr
2014-09-24 7:33:30 PM  
"6 is the number of man"

No, it's not.
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
Uglybarnacle
2014-09-24 7:53:27 PM  
i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

I'm starting to think Christianity is a freaking type of mental retardation.
 
ultraholland
2014-09-24 8:03:53 PM  
Uglybarnacle: i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

His ways are so mysterious.

/pissterious?
 
lostcat
2014-09-24 8:08:50 PM  
He must have a really nasty bathroom.

Seriously though, this further illustrates the point that you can use the Bible to support any opinion.
 
Iplaybass
2014-09-24 8:38:23 PM  

Uglybarnacle: i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

I'm starting to think Christianity is a freaking type of mental retardation.


No, some dope from Backwater Toilet-town USA said that. Not God.
 
bubbadave1056
2014-09-24 8:40:24 PM  
Ummmmm...but God said He would DESTROY him that pisseth against the wall.  Maybe we should all squat, or did I miss something?
 
Uzzah
2014-09-24 8:40:44 PM  

Snapper Carr: "6 is the number of man"

No, it's not.
[i.imgur.com image 600x402]


Where is your mind, man?
 
HockeyGod98
2014-09-24 8:43:54 PM  
i.cdn.turner.comView Full Size

Mind you own biz, pastor.
 
foxy_canuck
2014-09-24 8:51:55 PM  

Uglybarnacle: i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

I'm starting to think Christianity is a freaking type of mental retardation.


Coming from someone who can make the leap from crazyass backwater preacher who was probably ordained by his cousin Cletus, preaching in his momma's basement to all Christianity... no, not even just Christianity... all religion.

FWIW, not that censorship is okay in general, but guys like this crazy mofo are exactly why the Church was against translating the Bible out of Latin.  To be able to read it you had to be a scholar, and read the language of scholars.  It was a defense against idiots who didn't know anything about who wrote what books, for what reasons, in what context, and would take everything literally and seriously.
 
Sensei Can You See [TotalFark]
2014-09-24 9:01:44 PM  
The whole pisseth against a wall thing is a euphemism referring to uncouth savages. The Jews were very conscientious about hygiene. The wording here is, I believe, actually an early modern English idiom.

/puts theology degree back in the drawer
 
HairBolus [TotalFark]
2014-09-24 9:16:41 PM  
I thought people were familiar with this bigoted unschooled nutjob though he hasn't said stuff against Obama or Gays or had airport problems to get him in the news recently.

This vid is a 2009 copy. I think Pastor Steven Anderson.posted the original himself and then later deleted it. Here is a February 12, 2008 post linking to the deleted YouTube.
http://ikinman.blogspot.com/2008/02/that-which-pisseth-understanding .h tml
 
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark]
2014-09-24 9:39:29 PM  

foxy_canuck: It was a defense against idiots who didn't know anything about who wrote what books, for what reasons, in what context, and would take everything literally and seriously.


You'd think that The Most Important Book ever written would be written in such a way as to make it impossible to be taken out of context or misinterpreted. What with being written by an all knowing and all powerful God an all.
 
SearchN
2014-09-24 9:41:49 PM  

Snapper Carr: "6 is the number of man"

No, it's not.
[i.imgur.com image 600x402]


It's 11. The number I can count to after taking off my socks and pants.
 
Sensei Can You See [TotalFark]
2014-09-24 9:48:26 PM  

Ed Grubermann: written in such a way as to make it impossible to be taken out of context or misinterpreted


Right. And how exactly would that work again?
 
whither_apophis [TotalFark]
2014-09-24 9:57:36 PM  

Ed Grubermann: foxy_canuck: It was a defense against idiots who didn't know anything about who wrote what books, for what reasons, in what context, and would take everything literally and seriously.

You'd think that The Most Important Book ever written would be written in such a way as to make it impossible to be taken out of context or misinterpreted. What with being written by an all knowing and all powerful God an all.


Actually the part of the Bible that claims to be directly from God is pretty straightforward: "only worship me, no idols, don't kill, don't steal, don't be a putz to your parents, etc..."
 
RoyFokker'sGhost
2014-09-24 10:04:03 PM  
So....according to him....God says 'I will destroy him that pisseth against the wall'. And then he goes on to say how standing up to piss is a good thing. Essentially pissing standing up is a good thing, even though it's against a wall....Which he just said God would destroy you for....


I know...there is no logical analysis to insane preachers....
 
Corn_Fed
2014-09-24 10:14:54 PM  
And this pastor, Stephen Anderson, also has some constructive things to say about the gays, as well:

http://www.christianpost.com/news/bible-says-gays-should-be-executed -a nd-i-believe-every-word-says-arizona-pastor-99583/
 
Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf
2014-09-24 11:22:22 PM  
Anyone know why pissing while standing is prohibited in some places?
 
fickenchucker
2014-09-25 12:26:17 AM  
Dude's insane. Move along and don't make eye contact.
 
neuroflare
2014-09-25 12:40:43 AM  
fark, that guy lives in Tempe? Maybe I could go pull the stems from his tires for being such a farking moran.
 
lohphat
2014-09-25 2:56:48 AM  

Uglybarnacle: i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

I'm starting to think Christianity is a freaking type of mental retardation.


Why is religion specifically excluded from the delusion section of the DSM 5?
 
danielscissorhands
2014-09-25 2:59:03 AM  
Pistorius!

media.apnarm.net.auView Full Size
 
gfid
2014-09-25 4:23:04 AM  

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: Anyone know why pissing while standing is prohibited in some places?


The only possible reason I can think of is we sometimes don't aim very well.

I spent a couple weeks in Germany and never saw a sign like that.

Their bathrooms were pretty confusing though.  For some reason women went into the bathroom marked Damen (which looks like it translates to "the men") and men went into the bathroom marked "Herren" (which looks like it translates into "hers").

It only took me 10 days to figure out
 
ultraholland
2014-09-25 4:36:35 AM  
Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: Anyone know why pissing while standing is prohibited in some places?

cuz in D-Block you sit when you pee, fish!
 
Unscratchable_Itch
2014-09-25 5:12:00 AM  
I thought this sounded familiar.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QYTxozuVaY
 
scrumpox
2014-09-25 7:51:54 AM  
cl.jroo.meView Full Size
 
Kibbler
2014-09-25 8:23:49 AM  
"Nobody likes me.  You don't like me already, so why should I try to get you to like me?  Nobody likes me.  Now I'm going to lecture you on how to pee.  Nobody likes me."
 
InterruptingQuirk
2014-09-25 8:53:11 AM  
Fark, I am disappoint(in myself as well)

3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
joeshill
2014-09-25 8:56:48 AM  
Every instance of "him that pisseth against the wall" gets simply translated to male or man in all of the modern translations.  It's simply a way to differentiate male from female.

Think about your old sexist racist grandfather using phrases like:

"Every swinging dick"
"stander" (versus "sitter")
"shooter" (versus "dribbler")


That old racist sexist bastard grandpa?  That's God.  Just ignore what he says, and be nice to one another anyway.
 
bo_loo
2014-09-25 10:11:56 AM  
The sign means no pissing....does not mean no pissing standing up.

Can be seen all over the grounds of the Octoberfest

mysporttrac.comView Full Size
 
Valiente
2014-09-25 11:15:58 AM  

Uglybarnacle: i cant take religion seriously anymore after this. Cosmos of billions of galaxies, and God, in control of all of that, says

"Pee a certain way"

I'm starting to think Christianity is a freaking type of mental retardation.


"Starting"? Please indicate where Christian exegesis is different from garden-variety lunacy. But half of America would give this piss-freak more than a derisive laugh.

On my boat, if you fail to sit when you piss, you are my chum.

Yeah, the kind you ladle.
 
Valiente
2014-09-25 11:18:29 AM  

Ed Grubermann: foxy_canuck: It was a defense against idiots who didn't know anything about who wrote what books, for what reasons, in what context, and would take everything literally and seriously.

You'd think that The Most Important Book ever written would be written in such a way as to make it impossible to be taken out of context or misinterpreted. What with being written by an all knowing and all powerful God an all.


Being all-powerful and whatnot, why are there Bibles at all? Shouldn't this guff be inerrantly implanted in our brains through processes both magical and undeniable? Oh, wait, that would end the need for sacred bellhops.
 
real_headhoncho [TotalFark]
2014-09-25 12:11:56 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Mr. Cat Poop
2014-09-25 1:07:30 PM  

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: Anyone know why pissing while standing is prohibited in some places?


Because some of you savages can't aim worth a shiat. Sitting in someone else's piss droplets is gross.
 
SansNeural
2014-09-25 9:21:08 PM  

Mr. Cat Poop: Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: Anyone know why pissing while standing is prohibited in some places?

Because some of you savages can't aim worth a shiat. Sitting in someone else's piss droplets is gross.


Yep.  Public restrooms are probably worse because of the anonymity - just pissing through. But even I have begun to realize, over time and especially with a now teen son, even if we aim straight, shiat, I mean piss, goes everywhere.  These days at home, unless I'm out in the woods, I generally sit down.. and get pissed when I find that my son has pissed on the toilet seat.  Or my daughter scraped her ass across the seat without wiping first (both true happenings).

Damn.  I've raise a couple of barbarians.  Just like the rest of you parents, it seems.
 
memebot_of_doom
2014-09-26 4:08:08 AM  
Probably a good idea in most cases...

i.ytimg.comView Full Size
 
Displayed 37 of 37 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh comments
This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

If you like these links, you'll love

TotalFark

The next best thing to UltraFark

learn more | sign up
On Twitter

  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.