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(Bloomberg)   Country songwriter alert: Man's dog dies. Fark: But not before giving him pneumonic plague, the deadliest kind there is. Try to work "pneumonic" into the lyrics, ok?   ( bloomberg.com) divider line
    More: Scary  
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5125 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jul 2014 at 11:25 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-07-12 09:33:17 AM  
13 votes:
Rod Stewart could pull it off:

You're in my heart, you're in my lungs,
You steal my breath my health's undone
You killed my dog, who's my best friend.
You took my life...

The plague lost its glamour,
the cough makes me stammer,
But you're every MD's dream.
You're deep in, pneumonic, but baby I've decided
you're the best phlegm I've ever seen.
2014-07-12 11:30:45 AM  
11 votes:
Jimi Hendrix did it from the point of view of the dog...

Pneumonic plague was in my lung,
Vectors out upon my tongue.
Actin' funny but I don't know why
'scuse me while I lick my guy.
2014-07-12 09:45:59 AM  
4 votes:
♫ My dog just died, it was the plague
The doctors, they were pretty vague
But then they said it was pneumonic
So now I'm drinkin' gin and tonic... ♫
2014-07-12 11:33:23 AM  
3 votes:
I have a device that I usually use to help me work words like "pneumonic" into song lyrics, but for the life of me I can't remember its name.
2014-07-12 11:31:11 AM  
3 votes:
If you'll try to refrain
I have this to explain
My dogs lifeline is the wind and the rain
Baby can you dig your dog
He's a righteous dog
Baby can you dig your dog
I'll see his like again
Baby can you dig your dog?
2014-07-12 11:27:34 AM  
3 votes:
Supersonic, can't smoke the chronic cause I got pneumonic.

Pay me.
2014-07-12 11:54:24 AM  
2 votes:
What kind of plague is pneumonic
So obscure to require a mnemonic
Bubonic is not my pal
Thriving in lymph intersti-e-al
Septicemic makes me pout
In blood vessels which runs throughout
Pneumonic rolls right off my tongue
Festering in my abnormal lung
Pharyngeal makes me hoarse
While in my throat of course
Meningeal I cannot maintain
As it ventures to my brain
All from grace on up above
Though none as infectious as your love
2014-07-12 06:34:44 PM  
1 vote:
Okay, Let's see what I can bring to the parody table.

How many dogs must a man ever own
Before you call him a man?
How many times must his plague dog lick
Before he sleeps in the sand?
Yes, how many times must the prairie dogs infect,
Before they're forever banned?
Pneumonic plague, my friend is blowin' in the wind
The Plague is blowin' in the wind.
2014-07-12 01:33:08 PM  
1 vote:
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bridge i'll die
Dogs get pneumonic plague but
Why oh why did I?

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bridge I'll die
And Obama care death
panels sit idly by

Someday I'll cough my lung out far
And wake up mortal koil far behind me
Where mucous melts and tissue rots
just like a zombies pieces drop
In my grave you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bridge I'll die
Now I know that dogs are
beter than cats is lies.
2014-07-12 01:00:07 PM  
1 vote:
I looked into his sad eyes and we both knew
My buddy had more than a simple flu.
His doggy days were numbered, dwindling to just a few.
And in those eyes he seemed to say "I've got a present just for you."

Aaaaaaaaannnnnnnnndddddd he hocked a lugie in my mouth.
More than a little spittle, his spewed out sputum knocked me south.
Yeah, he hocked an enormous lugie in my mouth.

So here I lie in hospital, dying from my doggie's spittle.
With all the tubes and needles, I can still smile a little
Cause when I get to Heaven, right there in the middle
Will be my Buddy, my boots and a huge pool of piddle.

Aaaaaaaaannnnnnnnndddddd he hocked a lugie in my mouth.
More than a little spittle, his spewed out sputum knocked me south.
Yeah, he hocked an enormous lugie in my mouth.
Yeah, he hocked a deadly, damning, enormous lugie in my mouth
2014-07-12 12:37:11 PM  
1 vote:
You gave me the plague pneumonic
It's a shame it wasn't bubonic

Cause you me could spend eternity
licking out nuts like friends should be
2014-07-12 12:34:56 PM  
1 vote:
Pneumonic, bubonic,
Teutonic, ironic
Masonic, platonic,
And I loved that dog
I loved that dog....

Eh, you gotta hear the melody.
2014-07-12 12:10:44 PM  
1 vote:

bigpeeler: Kind of rhymes with "moronic" which is apropos for country music.

Bless your heart
2014-07-12 11:58:12 AM  
1 vote:
deltasupply.netView Full Size


/Okay, I think i'm done now
2014-07-12 11:51:36 AM  
1 vote:
"The reaction is leaning toward people who are tired of the protection of prairie dogs on some level."

Is this a sentence? Somewhere, Sarah Palin is winking.
2014-07-12 11:46:08 AM  
1 vote:
I'm so pnemonic,
I can't play my harmonic-a!
2014-07-12 11:43:03 AM  
1 vote:
Pneumatic, Baby!

I'm jess an old country boy
You know my dog is dead
My plague is pneumonic
It's in my lungs and head.
But the worst of it all
Is my music's atonic
And it don't rhyme much neither.
2014-07-12 10:59:41 AM  
1 vote:
Kind of rhymes with "moronic" which is apropos for country music.
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-07-12 09:50:26 AM  
1 vote:
I wish Warren Zevon were still around. He worked "brucellosis" into a song. He could do pneumonic plague or Yersinia pestis.
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