If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Slate)   If you think standardized testing is bad, wait until you see what happens when a parent opts her kid out of the test   ( slate.com) divider line
    More: Scary, University of Denver, parents, standardized test, online school, report cards, school library  
•       •       •

21866 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2014 at 1:11 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-03-10 01:47:20 PM  
10 votes:

CokeBear: Teaching the kids to fight the power might be the most valuable lesson they ever learn.

I agree. I try to teach my kids to challenge everything, a little.


My daughter was 8 and the following conversation happened:

"What did you do in school today?"
"We learned about probability."
"Great! So if I flipped a coin, what is the probability that it will land on heads?"
"50% chance or one in two."
"OK, let's say I flipped the coin 100 times and it came up heads each time. What is the probability that it will come up heads the next time?"
"Pretty good."
"Oh? Why?"
"I know you Daddy, if you flipped a coin 100 times and it came up heads every time it has heads on both sides."
2014-03-10 01:24:03 PM  
5 votes:
A child is being left behind!!
2014-03-10 01:13:55 PM  
4 votes:
People need to know when they are conquered. Now sit down and bubble in the responses because reasons.
2014-03-10 02:57:49 PM  
3 votes:
The Assistant Principal

soundonsight.orgView Full Size
2014-03-10 02:20:50 PM  
3 votes:

Okieboy: I was expecting a thrilling finish to this exciting read....nothing.

/who the hell cares


The last phone call I received was from the Dean of Students at Harvard University. The middle school's vice-principal's daughter had once dated the nephew of the cousin of the daughter of the Dean, and so the vp had contacted the Dean for assistance.

The Dean was very clear in her insistence that my daughter take the test, and her reasoning grew more antagonistic. My daughter would end up a meth addict, she said. Pregnant at 15, destined to live under the George Washington Bridge and selling her body to keep her fix on. She'd have piercings in her face done by a transient with a dirty syringe, and they'd become infected and start weeping vile-smelling pus into her filthy dreadlocks. She'd get ingrown toenails and lick ketchup out of the discarded packets on the ground by the Sabretts carts. Her vocabulary would disintegrate into street slang consisting of, "A'ight?" and "Y'knowwhatI'msayin'" and "Ya hear me, dog?"

And that became too much for me to bear. I'm a strong, educated woman with great posture and a killer smile. I eat school administrators for lunch and laugh at their threats against my family. But the thought of my daughter uttering the word "A'ight" when asked if she wanted another crumpet with her tea was too much to bear. I went home that very day, pried the phone out of my girl's perfectly polished nails, and marched her right back to school...but not before getting a copy of the test into her hot little hands. There's no way I'm going to let my girl be a FAILURE.
2014-03-10 02:54:12 PM  
2 votes:
Almost 160 posts and no one has asked is our kids learning.

W was right.
2014-03-10 01:39:49 PM  
2 votes:
FARK's Hypocrisy

1) Parents who don't force their kids to do what is mandated by the schools are helicopter parents raising snowflakes.

2) The government is facelss machine that no one would show bow to.

3) People who do what is mandated for them are cookie-cutter people who live in cubicle farms and are miserable.

4) People shouldn't be forced to do things just because, and anyone who stands up to that is a hero.
2014-03-10 01:36:36 PM  
2 votes:
4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
2014-03-10 01:26:42 PM  
2 votes:
i would just tell my kids to answer every question wrong on purpose.
2014-03-10 10:05:33 PM  
1 vote:

TNel: eeyore102: The worst thing about these dumb tests is that schools no longer have any incentive to challenge gifted kids, since they're not the ones bringing down the averages.

If a student is truely gifted they don't need any incentive to learn new things.  Gifted programs are garbage and are only for parents to think they are special by having a kid in the program that does jack for the student.

Ebenezer TNel says "are there no libraries? Are there no TED talks?"
2014-03-10 05:14:38 PM  
1 vote:

jst3p: Russ1642: Right in front of the pricipal I'd have said "honey, go ahead and do the test but try not to get a single question right."

Meh, if it mattered to me I would just make sure my kid knows that it doesn't matter how he does on the test so try or don't, I don't care.

anshuchristajacobson.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
2014-03-10 04:21:20 PM  
1 vote:
When I was in college we had to take some stupid test like this too.  I was enrolled in night classes that were designed for working adults, 3 hours once a week for 6 weeks then on to the next course, basically designed to run us through as quickly as possible with a degree in hand.  Anyway 1st couple times we had to take these tests it was stated that they do not count towards grade & no work was ever assigned after taking it.  So I would use this as my only day to miss.  Soon it changed to you must be here the night of the test in order to get points for attending.  The made it weighted enough that you didnt want to miss it.  So I went with "C" the whole way down and left 15 minutes into the 3 hour long class.  Got a call from the dean & person in charge of the adult education class wanting to meet with me, so next day I meet them and they really wanted me to retake the test.  I asked "Does it count towards my overall grade?"  "Well, no but it means alot to the school that you score highly on it."  "I have better things to do with my time than take a test that doesnt matter for my grade.  I'm here to get a piece of paper.  I left early to go to my son's baseball game, that is more important to me than the test."  It was a private "christian" based university that loved to preach on family being super important and that most of us were doing this to better our family.  The look on their face when they had to decide if they wanted to tell me that them getting more funding vs me watching my 8 year old play ball was priceless.  Took 2 other people coming to me on separate occasions before I took it again.  Still did a crappy job on it, I wasnt going to rack my brain trying to figure anything out just educated guess & move on.  Now that I think about it I should have dropped the harassment on them, they coulda paid me for my degree.
/end csb
2014-03-10 04:16:37 PM  
1 vote:

error 303: Again, the mother seems more self interested and basing her decisions on, at best, faulty logic

There is a reason she teaches law, those who can't do and all...
2014-03-10 03:46:57 PM  
1 vote:

jylcat: Long story short


img.fark.netView Full Size

Nothing actually happened.

The end.

2014-03-10 03:45:06 PM  
1 vote:

Slypork: basically a glorified version of Trivial Pursuit.

it's called trampolinING, you're wrong!  ;P
img.fark.netView Full Size

/technically correct is best correct, i know...
img.fark.netView Full Size

//b-b-b-buttslashies... :(
///always come in... three's company too...
img.fark.netView Full Size
2014-03-10 02:41:59 PM  
1 vote:

teenytinycornteeth: Nothing like letting a seven year old know that life is nothing but rating and competition.

img.fark.netView Full Size
2014-03-10 02:31:10 PM  
1 vote:
Don't you love it when people in school are like, "I'm a bad test taker"? You mean, you're stupid. Oh, you struggle with that part where we find out what you know? Oh. No, no, I can totally relate. See, because I'm a brilliant painter, minus my God-awful brushstrokes. Oh, how the masterpiece is crystal up here[points to head], but once paint hits canvas, I develop Parkinson's. I apologize if there's a Parkinson's painter in the audience. I assume you do your best work in the morning. Probably gets abstract by noon.

/Daniel Tosh
2014-03-10 02:10:24 PM  
1 vote:
They're proud of themselves because they've taken a stand on something they think is important. It's a great feeling.

So this was all the kids' idea huh.  The article doesn't explain the children's reasoning for taking such a stand on this.

2014-03-10 01:53:32 PM  
1 vote:

Gary-L: bighairyguy: Her response should have been, "well, she has these testing anxienty attacks and marks about one third of the answers as "E", and skips all the other questions.  Would like to take a minor hit on the participation percentage or a big hit on the score average?"

When my son was doing the standardized testing, I told him it was all a joke as the school spent hours and hours teaching the test.

How to handle it?  "Hell kid, have fun.  Mark up the test all you want to fark with the results.  The only one who benefits from it is the school, not you."

My high school had standardized test scores determine who gets on campus parking.  And reduced or free prom bids for good scores.  And small prizes and coupons for those who give a "good faith effort"
2014-03-10 01:30:24 PM  
1 vote:

jst3p: we're just here for one academic year while I'm a visiting professor at the University of Denver. My daughters, ages 13 and 14, are strong students.

What kind of crappy parent bounces their kids in and out of a school for a year at this age?

The fake lawyer, blog writing kind...

Standardized tests are bullshiat anyway. I've never needed to know that a train traveling west at 100 mph will meet a train traveling east at 100 mph in 30 minutes; as such calculations have been rendered meaningless by paired rail tracks.
2014-03-10 01:26:04 PM  
1 vote:
If only there were some way to overcome anxiety by practicing that thing you were anxious about....

Perhaps with test anxiety, taking practice tests might help? Like for example, taking a stupid meaningless standardized test as practice for tests that actually matter?

Mollycoddled kid is mollycoddled.
2014-03-10 01:24:32 PM  
1 vote:
Her response should have been, "well, she has these testing anxienty attacks and marks about one third of the answers as "E", and skips all the other questions.  Would like to take a minor hit on the participation percentage or a big hit on the score average?"
2014-03-10 01:20:40 PM  
1 vote:
Are you allowed to write an article for Slate that isn't about the results of some questionable parenting decison you made, or questioning the parenting decision another person made?
2014-03-10 01:20:06 PM  
1 vote:

swaniefrmreddeer: Benevolent Misanthrope: swaniefrmreddeer: What is she teaching her kids? If it's hard, don't worry mommy will take care of you. Her reasons/excuses are irrelevant, the school her kids attend has the test, then the kids should goddamned well take the the test. No wonder we have a whole generation of precious snowflakes.

1/10.  RTFA, asshole.

I did, and it seemed to be far more about mommy than her kids. I have a kid with anxiety issues, sheltering him would only make the situation worse. Life is hard, the sooner kids learn that lesson the better.

And yet, actually reading and understanding the article continues to go right over your head. Amazing.

Let me guess: your livelihood depends on standardized testing. If so, kill yourself.
2014-03-10 12:58:32 PM  
1 vote:

swaniefrmreddeer: What is she teaching her kids? If it's hard, don't worry mommy will take care of you. Her reasons/excuses are irrelevant, the school her kids attend has the test, then the kids should goddamned well take the the test. No wonder we have a whole generation of precious snowflakes.

1/10.  RTFA, asshole.
2014-03-10 12:48:51 PM  
1 vote:
"Voluntary" has been a synonym with "mandated" for a long time in China

I really don't think we should be using the Chinese as our guides for political advancement.

//Not serious post
Displayed 26 of 26 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.