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(Mental Floss)   Hey ladies, ever wonder what your chances would have been like in Salem back in 1692 if you'd been accused of being a witch? Let's just put it this way...we hope you weigh more than a duck   ( mentalfloss.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Hey Ladies, female friends  
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11147 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Mar 2014 at 11:56 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-03-02 12:10:13 PM  
3 votes:
Well, it's 2014 and many people are convinced that I'm a witch. But they spell it differently.
2014-03-02 02:26:30 PM  
2 votes:
static.fjcdn.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 12:19:32 PM  
2 votes:

Needlessly Complicated: Benevolent Misanthrope: 1. Be a woman.

Aaaaaaand, we're done. Women are the Debbil and deserve anything that happens to them. That hasn't changed much in the US. You have no idea how refreshing it is to live in a place where that particular part of the "women are lesser" idea never took root.

What place is that? I would like to go to there, please.

Oh honey, I'd tell you but I know that women aren't good with directions.
2014-03-02 10:19:03 AM  
2 votes:
Knows something of witchcraft

a57.foxnews.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 04:22:08 PM  
1 vote:
mentalfloss.comView Full Size

I don't want to alarm anyone but that girl in the middle is actually a witch. Look at her eyes!
2014-03-02 03:11:38 PM  
1 vote:
static4.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size

I declareth this log to be a witch! And if you disagree with me'eth, you're a witch! - eth
2014-03-02 03:02:04 PM  
1 vote:
rubberduckface.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 01:48:41 PM  
1 vote:
12 out of 16!

mahurangi.org.nzView Full Size
2014-03-02 01:40:36 PM  
1 vote:

Aulus: National Geographic Channel recently had a program on this.  It seems to have largely been the work of one man, the preacher in Salem, who was not all that well liked.  He drummed up the bit about witches on the loose to increase his standing in the community.

popreflection.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 01:38:52 PM  
1 vote:
STILL more rational and merciful than the average modern Teabaggers.
2014-03-02 01:14:01 PM  
1 vote:

OtherLittleGuy: cirby: Of course, about one out of six of the accused (and of the executed) was male, and the whole thing was kicked off by a feud between women who were related to each other, but...

..and ended when people of property and power were starting to get accused, and it was beyond all fun and games.

/and it was in modern-day Danvers, aka "Salem Village"

One of the precious bits of information I learned while doing my family tree was that the witch accusations in Boston, MA, ended when one very rich Bostonian was accused and he responded like a gentleman bourgeois by suing his accuser for libel asking 1000 Pounds in damages.

Reason prevails. Or at least the Lord God Mammon. He is, like Jehovah, a God of Gods.

I like to shout JEHOVAH! Just because I can!
2014-03-02 12:59:13 PM  
1 vote:
The DSM is the new guidebook for witch hunts.
2014-03-02 12:56:47 PM  
1 vote:

Mr. Right: 14. Butter or milk has spoiled in your fridge

Exactly how many fridges were around in 1692?

Demonstrative of exactly the kind of journalistic integrity and precision one expects from mentalfloss

Well, I guess they were comparing that spoiled milk/dairy products were the sign of a witch but I'd mark that as "if you don't like a biatch, she's eating crackers like she owns the place."
2014-03-02 12:52:57 PM  
1 vote:

hitlersbrain: Witchfinder General. Best... Job... Ever.

the actual title is Witchsmeller Pursuivant
2014-03-02 12:42:09 PM  
1 vote:

Oblio13: "Having taken the suspected Witch, shee is placed in the middle of a room upon a stool, or Table, crosse legg'd, or in some other uneasie posture, to which if she submits not, she is then bound with cords, there is she watcht & kept without meat or sleep for the space of 24 hours. For (they say) within that time they shall see her Impe come and suck; a little hole is likewise made in the door for the Impe to come in at: and lest it might come in some lesse discernible shape, they that watch are taught to be ever & anon sweeping the room, and if they see any spiders or flyes, to kill them. And if they cannot kill them, then they may be sure they are her Impes."

- John Gaule, describing a test used by Witchfinders, 1646

Stress positions, sleep deprivation, and constant watching and harassment? Sounds like the test we now use to see if a Brown person is a terrorist.
2014-03-02 12:18:03 PM  
1 vote:
I like how they say the daughter "went prematurely insane."
2014-03-02 12:12:11 PM  
1 vote:

Nogale: Well, it's 2014 and many people are convinced that I'm a witch. But they spell it differently.

2014-03-02 12:09:41 PM  
1 vote:

vudukungfu: All women weight more than a duck, cursemitter.

You sound like you don't know the earth is banana shaped.
2014-03-02 09:57:10 AM  
1 vote:
I'd accuse them. Thoroughly. Until they were thoroughly disappointed.

images.dvdsea.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 09:47:50 AM  
1 vote:
Oh there still are witch hunts on, subby...

cdn.breitbart.comView Full Size
2014-03-02 09:03:00 AM  
1 vote:
It sounds to me like if you had anything anybody wanted, or were poor and dependent upon the community or believed in the wrong god then an organized group of holier than thou rich old white men would fark your shiat up by accusing you of 'congress with teh debbil'. After 300+ years we now call that group of old white men 'Congress'
2014-03-02 08:52:17 AM  
1 vote:

vudukungfu: All women weight more than a duck, cursemitter.

Well, then when they bind her and throw her in the mill pond she'll sink and drown.  At least her soul will be saved.
2014-03-02 08:49:40 AM  
1 vote:
All women weight more than a duck, cursemitter.
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