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1293 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jan 2014 at 8:09 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2014-01-25 08:16:02 PM  
"For what it's worth: it's never too late to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again."

- Benjamin Button
2014-01-25 08:16:47 PM  
Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
2014-01-25 08:17:29 PM  
bbsimg.ngfiles.comView Full Size
2014-01-25 08:17:32 PM  
Confucius says, When not in use... turn off the juice.
2014-01-25 08:18:01 PM  
I hate to advocate drugs,alcohol,violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.-Hunter S. Thompson.
2014-01-25 08:18:04 PM  
If you're not wasted, the day is.
2014-01-25 08:18:31 PM  
"I was walking along the bank of a stream when I saw a mother otter with her cubs, a very endearing sight, I'm sure you'll agree.
And even as I watched, the mother otter dived into the water and came up with a plump salmon, which she subdued and dragged onto a half submerged log. As she ate it, while of course it was still alive, the body split and I remember to this day the sweet pinkness of its roes as they spilled out, much to the delight of the baby otters, who scrambled over themselves to feed on the delicacy.
One of nature's wonders, gentlemen. Mother and children dining upon mother and children.
And that is when I first learned about evil. It is built into the very nature of the universe.
Every world spins in pain. If there is any kind of supreme being, I told myself, it is up to all of us to become his moral superior."
-Terry Pratchett-
2014-01-25 08:18:33 PM  
"...You're right, but I don't think we build cemeteries for the dead. Sure, it may seem pointless to you, but... How can I describe it? It's so that we can think like this: 'We'll never forget you. We'll remember you every time we stand at your grave. And we won't let the fear of death, which each of us knows, stop us from living our lives. ...Because my friends will remember me when I'm here.'"
- Black Mage No. 288, Final Fantasy IX
2014-01-25 08:18:36 PM  
Resources exist to be consumed. And consumed they will be, if not by this generation then by some future. By what right does this forgotten future seek to deny us our birthright? None I say! Let us take what is ours, chew and eat our fill.

CEO Nwabudike Morgan
2014-01-25 08:18:53 PM  
2014-01-25 08:19:03 PM  
I wanna dip my balls in it

24.media.tumblr.comView Full Size

2014-01-25 08:19:09 PM  
Winter is coming.

-A Stark
2014-01-25 08:19:27 PM  
Lighten up, Francis.
2014-01-25 08:19:27 PM  
"He who warned, uh, the British that they weren't gonna be takin' away our arms, uh, by ringing those bells, and um, makin' sure as he's riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed."

-Thomas Jefferson
2014-01-25 08:19:57 PM  

Johnny_Canuck: JasonOfOrillia: Alcohol isn't a crutch, it's a life jacket.

Welcome to Orillia.

I like swords!
2014-01-25 08:20:27 PM  
Aint no thing but a chicken wing.

I have only once ever been wrong.  It was when I thought I was wrong but it turned out that I wasn't.

When I turn 75 I am going to suck a great big dick.  If I like I am going to be god damn pissed off that I didn't figure that out earlier.
2014-01-25 08:20:54 PM  
One of the hardest things for me to learn was that most people would rather feel validated than correct. Somehow, for these people, to live in that delusional fantasy is preferable to searching out the truth. This is why people get so angry when a fault is pointed out. As for me, I'd rather know when I'm doing something wrong. Most people just want to be told they're right, and they don't care if it's true or not.
2014-01-25 08:20:55 PM  
A pun is a rare medium well done.
2014-01-25 08:21:35 PM  
I have seen further than others because I have stood on the shoulders of giants.

- Isaac Newton
2014-01-25 08:21:38 PM  
"Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common."

                   Dorothy Parker
2014-01-25 08:22:03 PM  
"All we need is a voluntary, free-spirited, open-ended program of procreative racial deconstruction. Everybody just gotta keep farkin' everybody 'til they're all the same color.

~Jay Billington Bulworth
2014-01-25 08:22:04 PM  

Donnchadha: Looks like it'll be about 2 hours work, with parts, comes to $243.87

I wish I could get my mechanic to quote like that. He rarely dips below the $500 mark.

More if I get cheeky (for example, "fix the brakes" costs the same as "I already changed pads and rebuilt the master cylinder, but please turn the rotors", which also costs the same as "I got new rotors and rebuilt the master cylinder and changed the pads and replaced all the lines with stainless steel, but please shine a flashlight in there and look for lost screwdrivers and mice").

My wife does not question this system and swears by him. :)
2014-01-25 08:22:20 PM  
The difference between adventure and ordeal is attitude.


Don't do it unless it gets you laid or gets you paid.
2014-01-25 08:22:57 PM  
"You might not always get what you want in life, but you'll always get what you're willing to tolerate." --SOWB
2014-01-25 08:23:06 PM  
"Free your mind and your ass will follow" George Clinton
2014-01-25 08:23:07 PM  
Thirty spokes join together in the hub.
It is because of what is not there that the cart is useful.
Clay is formed into a vessel.
It is because of its emptiness that the vessel is useful.
Cut doors and windows to make a room.
It is because of its emptiness that the room is useful.
Therefore, what is useful is used for profit.
But it is in absence that there is usefulness.
-Tao Te Ching, 11

Whoa, Doc, this is heavy!
-Marty McFly
2014-01-25 08:23:56 PM  
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2014-01-25 08:24:12 PM  
"I used to be disgusted; now I try to be amused."

Or, in the alternative:

"I don't fark much with the past, but I fark plenty with the future."
2014-01-25 08:24:16 PM  
Someone once asked a French priest who was older than sin (he had lived through WWI, the Great Depression and WWII among other tragedies) what he had learned in all his years of service.

The priest said "There is no such thing as a grownup."
2014-01-25 08:25:08 PM  
Even a small population is hard to completely extirpate, short of rendering the planet uninhabitable.
- Admiral Ivan Antonov

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
- Lieutenant Ellen Ripley
2014-01-25 08:25:52 PM  
"Crush your enemies, See them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women!"

- Mitt Romney
2014-01-25 08:26:24 PM  
"And for f*cks sakes, man, take a shower. You look like a f*ckin' hobolo."
2014-01-25 08:26:45 PM  
"You do not have telepathic powers." Me to biatchy stepdaughter.
"You don't know me!" biatchy stepdaughter.
2014-01-25 08:26:56 PM  
The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views. Which can be uncomfortable if you happen to be one of the facts that needs altering.

The Doctor, Face of Evil
2014-01-25 08:27:01 PM  
Here's 3 precious expressions that I'd like to share with all of you:

Don't judge a book by its cover.

If you get lemons, make lemonade.

Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get.

You're welcome!
2014-01-25 08:27:16 PM  
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2014-01-25 08:27:19 PM  
2014-01-25 08:27:22 PM  
Hail to the lies by which all truths are hounded!
2014-01-25 08:28:01 PM  

Shedim: Johnny_Canuck: JasonOfOrillia: Alcohol isn't a crutch, it's a life jacket.

Welcome to Orillia.

I like swords!

Oh-rillia land of beer.
2014-01-25 08:28:07 PM  
Sign on a restroom wall...."If you shake it more than twice your playing with it".
2014-01-25 08:28:09 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
2014-01-25 08:28:25 PM  
"No doubt the truth can be unpleasant, but I am not sure that unpleasantness is the same as the truth." - Roger Ebert
2014-01-25 08:28:27 PM  
If you cannot answer a man's argument, all is not lost; you can still call him vile names. -- Elbert Hubbard
2014-01-25 08:29:20 PM  
It is better to remain quiet and let people wonder if you are a fool then speak and remove all doubt.

2014-01-25 08:29:34 PM  
A world-hardened and weary man in his middle years might come across a stuffed bear and be surprised, and his hardness broken for a minute as he feels a tug in his breast as if a line immensely long and thin were still attached between his heart and this scuffed forgotten friend. But the bear never doubted.
Richard Kennedy, Amy's Eyes
2014-01-25 08:30:08 PM  
It's not the time to dunk your dicky when the weather's hot and sticky.
The time for dicky dunkin is when the frost is on the punkin.

Dipthong Warthog
2014-01-25 08:30:18 PM  
"I have come here to chew bubble gum & kick ass. And I'm all out of bubble gum." --Rowdy Roddy Piper

"Let me tell you something. There is nothing more disturbing in life than a pile of shiat where it doesn't belong." --Tucker Max

"Just because you're winning, don't mean you're the lucky one." --Axl Rose
2014-01-25 08:30:47 PM  
"War is just a racket."

--US Marine Corps Major General Smedley Butler, two time Medal of Honor awardee (strangely NOT buried in Arlington)
2014-01-25 08:31:01 PM  

Johnny_Canuck: Shedim: Johnny_Canuck: JasonOfOrillia: Alcohol isn't a crutch, it's a life jacket.

Welcome to Orillia.

I like swords!

Oh-rillia land of beer.

Where 77% said "Yes."

img.fark.netView Full Size
2014-01-25 08:31:06 PM  
The devil hath the power
To assume a pleasing shape.

--William Shakespeare
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