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(Fark)   Fark's 2013 HEADLINE OF THE YEAR contest   ( fark.com) divider line
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6849 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Dec 2013 at 4:00 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2013-12-18 01:48:50 PM  
Welcome to Fark's Headline of the Year contest for 2013! Yesterday we did the subtab headlines, and we're still working on the context and wordplay contests, but today is your chance to vote for all of the best headlines that graced Fark's main page this year.

Like I say every year, voting for these is fun, but the credit should go to all of the amazing submitters that make us laugh each and every day. Your headlines make Fark what it is. Thank you and kudos.

Okay, enough with the talk. Without further ado, this is your 2013 Headline of the Year contest.
2013-12-18 01:49:13 PM  
McAfee founder arrested by police. His 21 day free trial begins next week

2013-12-18 01:49:30 PM  
Homeless man falls to death in an elevator shaft. That is wrong on so many levels

2013-12-18 01:49:47 PM  
Earth Wind and Fire concert canceled due to water

2013-12-18 01:50:02 PM  
Shootout near golf course leaves hole in one

2013-12-18 01:50:28 PM  
Man accused of bestiality porn gets off on a technicality. Also, a horse, several dogs, a lemur and a pack of ferrets

2013-12-18 01:50:52 PM  
Utah woman gives birth to a 14-pound baby boy. Hospital takes bets on who will walk first

2013-12-18 01:51:10 PM  
Missing skydiver found 28,006 feet from where someone last saw him

2013-12-18 01:51:36 PM  
In Limerick the morn began flawless, When two women a-sudden turned lawless, They fought on the ground, With kids all around, Till both of these Erins went bragh-less

2013-12-18 01:51:51 PM  
Actual headline: "FBI joins search for missing Brown student". There's a first time for everything, I suppose

2013-12-18 01:52:21 PM  
Judge rules baby must change name from Messiah to Martin because it "could put him at odds with a lot of people" in an area with a large Christian population. Because nobody named Martin ever got in a big feud with Christianity

2013-12-18 01:52:39 PM  
Adultsineurope killed by euthanasia

2013-12-18 01:52:56 PM  
"I'm a different person now," promises habitual identity thief

2013-12-18 01:53:17 PM  
With a failure rate of 85%, "magical thinking" is coming up the rear in birth control effectiveness. "Coming up the rear" still running in the low single-digits

2013-12-18 01:53:34 PM  
First black bears spotted in Anchorage. White bears immediately fear decline in den value

2013-12-18 01:53:50 PM  
Gabrielle Giffords honored with JFK award... well of course, she did meet the one major requirement

2013-12-18 01:54:06 PM  
Princess Diana peeled off Parisian tunnel wall. Again

2013-12-18 01:54:23 PM  
Coroner releases cause of death in lion attack. I'm not a coroner, but I'm going with lion here

2013-12-18 01:54:43 PM  
"Push to get kids off ATVs". Yep, well, that's one way to do it

2013-12-18 01:55:06 PM  
Congratulations to Steve Jobs. Two years cancer free

2013-12-18 01:55:24 PM  
10 most commonly mispronounced words. One of them is "phenomenon." (♫ do doooooo, do do do ♫) "Phenomenon." (♫ do do do do ♫) "Phenomenon." (♫ do dooooooo, do do do, do do do, do do do, do do do, do-do do do do-do do ♫)

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