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(Des Moines Register)   "There are an unbelievable number of poems that have been written about outhouses"   ( desmoinesregister.com) divider line
    More: Strange, Teresa Minard, Sears catalog, museum collections, Greene County, poems, outhouses, rural america  
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944 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Sep 2013 at 3:08 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

26 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
2013-09-20 03:10:11 PM  
And only one about Nantucket.
2013-09-20 03:11:58 PM  
Most people can't tell good poetry from a hole in the ground.
2013-09-20 03:12:22 PM  
Has there ever been a shortage of shiatty poetry?
2013-09-20 03:12:38 PM  
Here I sit
buns a flexin'
Giving birth
to another Texan
2013-09-20 03:14:38 PM  
My bathroom is terribly old
It's outside and covered in mold
I search for some paper
while smelling the vapor
and dropping my crap in the cold
2013-09-20 03:15:29 PM  
Knowing poets as I do
The number is more than simply two
2013-09-20 03:17:10 PM  
I only know a story about an outhhouse outside Lynchburg, Virginia.
2013-09-20 03:19:21 PM  
Folks back in the day were quite bitter
with an old wooden shed for a sh*tter
But now, don't you know
They complain 'bout low-flow
Cause a courtesy flush is for quitters
2013-09-20 03:20:12 PM  
2013-09-20 03:20:22 PM  
When I was a kid, the summer camp I went to had names for their outhouses. The one at our unit was named Edwina. You were considered an experienced camper when you took a dump in Edwina, wiped and made it out before you heard the splash.
2013-09-20 03:21:48 PM  

brap: Here I sit
buns a flexin'
Giving birth
to another Texan

Something something "Lone Shart State"

/I resent that remark!
2013-09-20 03:22:13 PM  
Here I sit, lonely hearted.
2013-09-20 03:23:28 PM  
I miss Chuck "Iowa Boy" Offenberger's columns.  I still read his website now and then to get a taste.


Recently enjoyed this remembering the Iron Lady bit.
2013-09-20 03:26:44 PM  
A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shiathouse wall
But before I die I'll add my regal scrawl
To show the world I'm left with sweet fark all
And when all of us bold shiathouse poets do die
A monument grand they will raise to the sky
A monument made just to mark our great wit
A monument of solid shiat now me boys
2013-09-20 03:30:43 PM  
Love me some outhouse music!   Listen now!
2013-09-20 03:45:30 PM  
Ooh, you just missed the Great Outhouse Blowout.
Last weekend. Gravel Switch, KY.
2013-09-20 03:46:21 PM  

johnny_vegas: here is one...

New Jersey The Garden State

Came in for Detroit, but this is close enough :)
2013-09-20 03:51:54 PM  
0< is an unbelievable number......
2013-09-20 04:01:44 PM  
There once was a young man named Clyde
Fell into an outhouse and died
Then one day his brother
Fell into another
Now they're interred side by side.
2013-09-20 04:24:44 PM  
"Some come here to sit and think
others come to shiat and stink
I come here to scratch my balls
and read the writing on the walls."

/has seen a Mens' Rooms done in classical Latin
2013-09-20 05:09:15 PM  
First Draft
Kermit the Frog

Why are there so many songs about shiathouses
And the business that goes on inside?
2013-09-20 05:56:45 PM  
Here I sit,
broken hearted
came to shiat
only farted.
2013-09-20 06:50:46 PM  
All of them are named: Ode to the Commode.
2013-09-20 08:17:11 PM  
O Cloacina, Goddess of this place, 
Look on thy suppliants with a smiling face. 
Soft, yet cohesive let their offerings flow, 
Not rashly swift nor insolently slow

Lord Byron
2013-09-20 09:20:47 PM  
Here I sat all broken hearted.
Tried to shat, but only farted.
So today I took a chance.
Now I say I shiat my pants.
Tomorrow I decide my fate.
I'll borrow a quart of Kaopectate.
2013-09-21 11:30:44 AM  
Even architects are interested in outhouses. Many years ago my grandparents had an architecture student from a nearby university show up to take measurements, pictures, etc. Turns out they had an architecturally important outhouse. Who knew?
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