Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Aero-News Newwork)   Flight Attendant: The attractive blonde in 14B says she has lost her artificial ocular implant. Pilot: Well, she did say she would keep an eye out for me   ( divider line
    More: Amusing, airliners, implants, dried fish, blonde  
•       •       •

10419 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Aug 2013 at 9:55 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

19 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
2013-08-26 09:57:58 AM  
img.timeinc.netView Full Size
2013-08-26 09:59:20 AM  
One has to remember to take advantage of those rare times one can interject a classic quip like that.
2013-08-26 10:00:23 AM  
clarineyecare.comView Full Size
2013-08-26 10:03:31 AM  
I always wondered where those onions ended up.
d23 [BareFark]
2013-08-26 10:07:24 AM  
images2.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size

God damn it...
2013-08-26 10:14:46 AM  

d23: [292x390 from a/Sandy-duncan-1.jpg image 292x390]

God damn it...

So that's what you call a woman with no arms, no legs and a glass eye on the beach.
2013-08-26 11:00:51 AM  

d23: [292x390 from a/Sandy-duncan-1.jpg image 292x390]

God damn it...

i41.tinypic.comView Full Size
2013-08-26 11:06:33 AM  
wh40k.lexicanum.comView Full Size

"You always say I'd lose my ocular implant if it wasn't riveted to my skull!"
2013-08-26 11:27:50 AM  
Here til thursday, veal, tip waiter and all that shat.
2013-08-26 11:38:39 AM  
The flight takes a bump, and the implant pops up into the air in front of a male passenger who catches it, and returns it to its owner.
After the flight, she invites him for a drink to thank him.  They hit it off and begin dating.
Their dates go well, and she showers him with gifts, always pays at restaurants, opens doors for him, and introduces him to friends who hook him up with a great job.
Things are going so well, he wants to marry her, but he's curious why she's doing all this for him, so he asks her about it.
Him:  "Look at all the gifts you've bought me, and all the things you've done for me.  Why are you so nice to me?"
Her:  "Well, that first day we met. . . you really caught my eye."

Ba-dum-dum!  Ting!
-Tip your waitress, and try the veal!
2013-08-26 11:59:54 AM  
I'm married to an attractive brunette with an artificial ocular implant, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies...

/went with her to the ocularist last year to get a new one made
//it's a fantastic blend of art and sqiuck
2013-08-26 12:22:31 PM  
Wants it back.
media.nola.comView Full Size
2013-08-26 12:30:50 PM  
She seems OK to me.
i41.tinypic.comView Full Size
2013-08-26 12:41:19 PM  
Did it look like this?

wiki.eveonline.comView Full Size
2013-08-26 01:12:28 PM  
Also among the most random items that cabin crews said they have found on a plane:

A clogBox of dried fishOne shoeBag of diamondsWigBag of onionsToupeeHandcuffsUnderwearTell you what, if I found a bag of diamonds, I'd likely not be working for that airline any longer.

That bag would be sold ASAP.
2013-08-26 01:15:22 PM  

gja: Here til thursday, veal, tip waiter and all that shat.

You haven't told a joke, so your comment does not apply, sir!
2013-08-26 01:19:40 PM  

Meatsim1: One has to remember to take advantage of those rare times one can interject a classic quip like that.

I am looking forward to the day I meet my girlfriends ex husband and I fantasize about being in a casual situation where he asks me how it is farking his leftovers, then I get to say "It's awesome, once I get past the first three inches, it's all new territory".  I don't know why I have already planned out this highly unlikely hypothetical situation in advance.  LOL
2013-08-26 03:13:49 PM  
Wanted for questioning:

images3.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
2013-08-26 04:49:18 PM  
How could a person pay the extra ticket to fly a double bass in a seat and then forget to take it off the plane? That's some grade A inattentiveness there.
Displayed 19 of 19 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.