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(Exeter Express & Echo)   'These things happen from time to time': Satanists slice donkey's genitals, ear, tongue and eyes out possibly while it was still alive, Livestock Protection Officer doesn't seem that worried   ( exeterexpressandecho.co.uk) divider line
    More: Scary  
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3981 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jul 2013 at 10:55 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-07-25 11:01:29 AM  
5 votes:

Di Atribe: Are Satanists really a thing? Or is it just one big troll so that people have an excuse to be assholes?

I think you meant 'have an excuse to put holes in asses'
2013-07-25 10:58:02 AM  
3 votes:
Satanic cults are to blame? Is it 1987 already?
2013-07-25 10:57:45 AM  
3 votes:
A dark Satanic cult has been blamed for the death of a pony which was horrifically mutilated in a ring of fire during a full moon. . . .

That's the worst kind of Satanic cult, you know.
2013-07-25 10:57:31 AM  
3 votes:
What about the Virgin Connie Swale?
2013-07-25 12:12:35 PM  
2 votes:

Fano: What about the Virgin Connie Swale?

It's just "Connie Swale" now.
2013-07-25 11:31:58 AM  
2 votes:
Bromies gone bad.
2013-07-25 10:36:03 AM  
2 votes:
mutilated in a ring of fire

And it burns, burns, burns.....
2013-07-25 12:27:12 PM  
1 vote:
Could it be...

threatormenace.comView Full Size
2013-07-25 12:16:14 PM  
1 vote:

images3.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
2013-07-25 12:02:50 PM  
1 vote:

Lady Indica: Di Atribe: Not sure if serious as I am still nursing the morning coffee, but.... atheists can't be Satanists?

Some don't believe in a literal 'Satan' but rather the symbolic concept. Just like people who quote Gordon Gecko, they don't really believe he's a real person, but rather the personification of their philosophical beliefs.

Neither is my cup o' tea.


Ended up reading LaVey's Satanic Bible when I lived in Boulder back in the day and had some friends in the Church of Satan.  I found it pretty abhorrent- not because of any demon or saucy ritual, but rather because the crux of the religion seems to be about self-service, which I think I've shown by this point is very much not my bag.

Interestingly, Gordon Gecko preached much the same.

Hard-right Republicans love Satanism, they just don't realize it yet.
2013-07-25 11:58:11 AM  
1 vote:
Sounds more like Old Testament rednecks to me. The ball-cutting is a sacrifice to THE LORD to take note of all those gaybo folk around and to do something about it.
2013-07-25 11:52:41 AM  
1 vote:
J. Frank Parnell

What we now commonly know and understand to be the devil has as much biblical support as the flying spaghetti monster.

Now you're just being blasphemous.

Exodus 12:8-9: "And they shall eat the flesh in that night, roast with fire, and unleavened bread; and with bitter herbs they shall eat it. Eat not of it raw, nor sodden at all with water, but roast with fire; his head with his legs, and with the purtenance thereof."

Meatballs (mixed parts of the animals) and pasta (unleavened bread, he even says not to make it soggy...al dente, if you please).

Psalm 78:23-28: "Though he had commanded the clouds from above, and opened the doors of heaven, And had rained down manna upon them to eat, and had given them of the corn of heaven. Man did eat angels' food: he sent them meat to the full. He caused an east wind to blow in the heaven: and by his power he brought in the south wind. He rained flesh also upon them as dust, and feathered fowls like as the sand of the sea. And he let it fall in the midst of their camp, round about their habitations."

Meatballs and pasta raining from heaven. Proof that the FSM is the true god of Israel; in their ignorance and sin, they anthropomorphised him, and named him YHWH, and thus were driven from their promised land and subjected to the arrows of those who make better meatballs.
2013-07-25 11:45:36 AM  
1 vote:

skozlaw: mike_d85: /Nothing pisses off satanists faster than to remind them of this

Was that information provided as a warning or a tip?

Depends on the satanist. I hate my parents - tip. I love PCP - warning.
2013-07-25 11:44:23 AM  
1 vote:

The Irresponsible Captain: meat0918: Sounds like they have a bored psychopathic teen in the area.

I'd go with this. If there's one thing we learned from the 80's, it's that Satanic Cults just don't exist, it's just Jack Chick blowing smoke up your donkey.

Well, I happened to know the bored teen accused of cutting up cows in abandoned buildings when I was in high school.  He was.... well, saying he was odd doesn't really describe it.

How many 17 year old's have you known that developed a cuneiform language for dolphins?
2013-07-25 11:28:40 AM  
1 vote:

Russ1642: Di Atribe: Are Satanists really a thing? Or is it just one big troll so that people have an excuse to be assholes?

I think you meant 'have an excuse to put holes in asses'

Haha dammit now I'm mad I didn't think of that. Well-played.

Facetious_Speciest: Satanists really are a thing. Generally speaking, there are three main types: atheists, Satan-as-hero people, and "OMG TEH DARK LORD MAKES ME CUT!" folks.

Not sure if serious as I am still nursing the morning coffee, but.... atheists can't be Satanists? But if one believes the Lucifer character in the Bible maybe wasn't so bad, does that make one a Satanist?

i27.photobucket.comView Full Size

Hey, I'm just asking questions.
2013-07-25 11:08:20 AM  
1 vote:
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.comView Full Size



I remember when I was a young lad flipping through the channels on summer break. There was a christian station showing a special on how heavy metal has made kids turn to SATAN. It had footage of Metallica shows, AC/DC shows, Megadeath etc. That show is what made me get into the heavier side of Rock.

end csb
2013-07-25 10:58:31 AM  
1 vote:
Get Scully and Mulder on the case.
2013-07-25 10:57:00 AM  
1 vote:

Facetious_Speciest: ...local horse carers believe the butchery was part of an evil occult or Pagan ceremony by Devil worshippers.

The Devil is a Christian deity. Not pagan.

/Nothing pisses off satanists faster than to remind them of this
2013-07-25 10:02:52 AM  
1 vote:
FTFA: The bodies had been arranged in a Satanic star shape, known as a pentangle, or laid out in a circle with their necks broken.

i.imgur.comView Full Size

The evidence is clear. Arrest all Moroccans.
2013-07-25 09:50:02 AM  
1 vote:
Guys like this are what gives Satanism a bad name.
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