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(SacBee)   You can pay smugglers thousands and walk across a hot desert to enter America, or simply hand over 200 egg rolls to the right immigration agent   ( sacbee.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, special agents, smugglers, hand over, Nguyen, immigrants, United States Attorney  
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3958 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jun 2013 at 10:55 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

19 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
2013-06-27 09:29:22 AM  
I am amazed at how free food, even cheap crap, sways people. Just ask any sales guy.
2013-06-27 09:55:29 AM  
You just can't  Nguyen.
2013-06-27 10:09:47 AM  
The agent should be fired for a wonton disregard of immigration policy.

/I'll be here all week
2013-06-27 10:40:43 AM  
cakeandallie.comView Full Size

Yep, Jade Dragon for lunch today.
2013-06-27 10:42:43 AM  
She only got those when she let in six.
2013-06-27 11:02:33 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
2013-06-27 11:25:09 AM  
Free sample! First sample always free! (Read that in a fake Chinese accent. The more idiotically stereotypical, the funnier it will be.)

For some reason, Quebequers often eat egg rolls at Christmas time. Another popular meal for the Holiday Season is lobster, most likely eaten on Christmas Eve before going to Christmas Midnight Mass or at New Years. Some Quebec families make several hundred home-made egg rolls ahead for friends and family. You know what they're doing for months before Christmas--they're stuffing egg rolls.

Why this is so, nobody knows. Quebec culture can be impenetrable.

The French Canadians spend a lot more on restaurants, travel, clothes, the home, and entertaining. The English Canadians buy insurance and a bigger house. They put more money away but they enjoy it less. Well, probably. It's hard to tell whether they enjoy money more or less than the fun you can have throwing it out the window. They must get some satisfaction from it. Many of them have wood piles at their cottage. This is a sure sign of insanity, as no sensible person will chop wood*.

*George W. Bush, Jr. did little else.
2013-06-27 11:35:41 AM  
Have you tasted my Auntie's egg rolls?

Totally worth it.
2013-06-27 11:42:20 AM  
Have you tried glaring disapprovingly and stopping at the top of the escalator?
2013-06-27 11:50:17 AM  
Give King Eggroll a try if you're ever in the Bay Area.  They'll ruin you on Egg Rolls.
2013-06-27 11:52:51 AM  
Actually I would figure you just wait until an illegal immigrant becomes president then get in for free and get phones and cars and health care without paying a dime!

(am I doing it right?)
2013-06-27 12:11:07 PM  
Sheesh, she couldn't have gotten egg rolls from someone in her own family?

She was born into the wrong Asian family :(
2013-06-27 12:17:27 PM  
I'm torn here. 'Cause I really, really like egg rolls.
2013-06-27 12:18:48 PM  
Fences dont eat egg rolls, but it will never be built... i give you
1986 - Congress passed the Immigration Reform and Control Act, which for the first time prohibited the employment of illegal aliens. This was part of a package that included amnesty for long-term illegal aliens who passed criminal checks, paid fees, and took classes on English language and U.S. civics and history. The promised enforcement started weakly and petered out. It got so bad than in 2004, only 3 employers in the entire nation were fined for hiring illegal aliens. An estimated 7-8 million illegal immigrants continue to hold jobs.
1996 - In the wake of the first World Trade Center bombing, Congress passed a wide-ranging enforcement law, the Illegal Immigration Reform and Immigrant Responsibility Act. Among its provisions was a requirement to develop an automated check-in/check-out system for foreign visitors, so the government could identify those who stayed past the time they were supposed to depart. Congress mandated such a system five more times, including in the USA Patriot Act, which required a biometric system (using fingerprints or photo recognition, for instance), in line with the recommendations of the 9/11 Commission. No such system yet exists.
2005 - The REAL ID Act required that state driver's licenses meet certain minimum standards to be acceptable for federal purposes, such as boarding airplanes. The standards included requiring proof of legal presence in the United States before issuing a license; this is an important immigration enforcement objective, because the driver's license is essential to illegal aliens seeking to embed themselves in American society. The original deadline for state compliance was 2008, later postponed to 2011, then 2013, and now 2017. It seems likely the deadline will be extended yet again, permitting several states to continue issuing licenses to illegal aliens.
2006 - The Secure Fence Act of 2006 required "at least 2 layers of reinforced fencing" along a total of roughly 650 miles of specifically designated stretches of the Mexican border. So far, less than 40 miles of such double-layered fencing have been built. The remainder is a mix of single-layer "pedestrian" fencing (designed to prevent people from infiltrating on foot) and vehicle barriers, which are low fences intended only to prevent trucks from driving across the border.

never a one followed through with... sad that people think somehow this will be different.
2013-06-27 12:26:49 PM  
Pretty sure they were spring rolls, not egg rolls.
2013-06-27 12:31:24 PM  
Lumpia uber alles.
2013-06-27 12:44:49 PM  
Or you can wait a few weeks and come in for free.
2013-06-27 02:38:56 PM  
CSB: I was in Vietnam a few years ago.  Airport customs had a line for Vietnamese and a line for foreigners.  I noticed a bunch of Vietnamese make it to the front of the line only to go to the back of the line after showing their passports.  Later learned from a local that their bribes tucked into their passports was not deemed high enough by the customs agent. SOP.

And here we are prosecuting a woman for egg rolls (and $3k).
2013-06-27 03:01:05 PM  
Every bureaucrat here in the capital of the third world is just as corrupt as whatever hell hole they came from. There was a gang of Mexicans working in one of the DMVs in LA and the criminal aliens would buy a bracelet from a street vendor outside for $800 and no matter what problems a wearer of the bracelet might have like no ID or driver training they still got a valid license. A TV station busted them too, not the state police.

If you want to park in LA for free just go to city hall and see what candy wrapper the cars on the street without parking tickets have on their dashboards and display the same wrapper the same way and you're good. It used to be almond m&ms but they got busted, again by a TV station, and had to switch.
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