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(Philly.com)   Mixed martial artist to sue a local store, saying the penis gel he bought cause penile scars, lack of pride   ( philly.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, martial artists, product liability  
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21 Comments     (+0 »)
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2013-05-22 12:26:10 PM  
or maybe it was the roids???
2013-05-22 12:27:09 PM  

2013-05-22 12:28:40 PM  
Chicks dig scars... well, in this case, maybe not.
2013-05-22 12:29:20 PM  
Ribbed for her pleasure?
2013-05-22 12:30:05 PM  
aint this a repeat?
2013-05-22 12:31:50 PM  
IF he used it before without any problems (his words) and now after boning his open marriage mother of his child, he gets some horrible penis eating bacteria, I would get her checked for some STD. It's probably some chemical reaction. Some girls can produce some nasty cocktails.
/So I've heard
2013-05-22 12:32:19 PM  
This guy is actually a good fighter.
2013-05-22 12:32:56 PM  
ONLINE ADS SAY the tingling, minty, green gel makes lovemaking last longer

Oh, he's a premature ejaculator. There's no weight training exercise that can clear that up. He should just get his three or four pumps in and when he feels like he's going to explode, hit her in the temple with an elbow and knock her unconscious. When she comes too, tell her it was the dick that put her out.
2013-05-22 12:33:03 PM  
Well of course he wouldn't have any pride, subby. UFC bought out PRIDE back in '07.
2013-05-22 12:34:51 PM  
lost wages and earning capacity?

Is he an MMA fighter or a sword fighter?
2013-05-22 12:35:29 PM  
Buy the Incredible Shrinking Cream™ It'll make it (the scars) so small, no one will see them.  Be warned, it does taste funny, but that takes care of itself for all but those gifted with microscopic vision.
2013-05-22 12:36:55 PM  
FTA: "In the complaint, filed May 14, Lowe claims he had used the desensitizing gel previously without problem. And when he applied it last Sept. 1, he and his fiancée began lovemaking without incident. But when their 3-year-old daughter awoke, the fiancée interrupted their intercourse to attend to her, according to the lawsuit.

Before she returned, Lowe "began to experience excruciating pain and pressure in his penis," the lawsuit states. "He removed the condom and his penis swelled significantly. He sought emergency medical treatment and follow-up care thereafter."

Is this level of detail really necessary?  At least we now have proof that if you ever stop the intercourse mid-sexing, you will destroy your junk.  Just don't do it, kids or the word "no" are not excuses (think about the penises). Also, he must be a super premature ejaculator to need a condom and this gel.  The condom probably saved his wife from getting the same raw deal
2013-05-22 12:37:39 PM  
a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.comView Full Size
2013-05-22 12:38:13 PM  
No you bought pumice gel by mistake.
2013-05-22 12:38:55 PM  
Repeat, but this is a better article with more detail.  So subby is forgiven.

The penile scars just match his ridiculous 'tribal' tattoos, right?
2013-05-22 12:39:54 PM  
Might have been so old that the stuff broke down into some bad juju.

I know a guy who got chemical burns from expired sun screen. He looked like he had meth face and a sun burn for weeks.
2013-05-22 12:40:18 PM  
Joe Son knows his pain.
2013-05-22 12:41:51 PM  
aint a this repeat?
2013-05-22 12:44:22 PM  
Pics or it didn't happen!
2013-05-22 12:44:43 PM  

FARK rebel soldier: [a4.ec-images.myspacecdn.com image 170x141]

2013-05-22 12:50:21 PM  
Kuddos for the "lack of pride" reference.
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