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(Fark)   Fark Food Thread: Looking back over all you've made, tell us... what recipe do you want to be remembered for? Difficulty: That didn't end in disaster   ( fark.com) divider line
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1134 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 May 2013 at 5:00 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2013-05-16 05:57:07 PM  
3 votes:
I used to be called the "chicken queen", I used to fry a lot of chicken - at home.

But what I'll be remembered for is the time I
BURNED the No-Bake Cheesecake.
2013-05-16 03:09:17 PM  
3 votes:
I make this wonderful dish in the pressure cooker.

It's call gunpowder chicken.  I leave out the chicken and add BBs.
2013-05-16 02:58:39 PM  
3 votes:
I make a great guacamole, but most likely people will remember me for killing and eating that intern from accounting. :(
2013-05-16 03:15:41 PM  
2 votes:

GladGirl: My brownies will change your life.

I can't, they drug test here at work
2013-05-16 02:49:43 PM  
2 votes:
farm5.staticflickr.comView Full Size
2013-05-16 07:06:51 PM  
1 vote:

IdBeCrazyIf: I made this beef soup that was so good once, literally liquid love rolling over your tongue and down your throat

I just wish I wasn't drunk at the time and could remember the number of items I used

I made shrimp with spaghetti squash. It had the perfect mix of seasonings and heat and was delicious..it was my parents' first time eating spaghetti squash and they loved it. They keep asking me to make it again.

The problem is I have no clue what I did.. I can't even remember if I had a recipe I strayed from or if I just did it all on my own.
2013-05-16 06:59:28 PM  
1 vote:
I once won a Super Bowl potluck contest for making Pork Belly Sliders.  You could feel your heart stopping with each bite, but holy shiat were they good.  My prize?  I drank for free during the whole game.  Called in sick the next day because, well, I was.
2013-05-16 06:51:01 PM  
1 vote:
When I used to have a yard, friends from far and wide would come for my ribs.  Ribapalooza they called it when the smoke was in the air.  Hell, a Pyramid Brewery rep even sponsored one of my barbecues.  Good free beer for all.  Folks would say, "how do you do it, Solid State Vittles?"  I'd say "it's in the rub."  "What is in the rub?"  "Ay, there's the rub.  I'm not telling."  Have to admit, I'd go out of my way to find the dinosaur bones too.  Those are the mammoth beef ribs.  Many have tried to make them right, many have failed.

I also make the best Turkish lentil and lamb shank dish in the world.  THE WORLD.
2013-05-16 06:16:09 PM  
1 vote:
Holiday Turkey Carcass Soup

1)  One turkey carcass with whatever meat your tribe did not eat at the big holiday dinner
2)  Lots of carrots (between 2 & 4 pounds)
3)  As many onions as you can stand to chop (1 to 3 pounds)
4)  One big head of celery (minus a couple of stalks to garnish your Bloody Marys)
5)  Mushrooms, lots (This is the expensive part.  Generally the more mushrooms the better.  1 to 5 pounds - any variety or a mix.)
6)  salt (to taste)
7)  black pepper, fresh ground (and I mean fresh.  Don't be a weenie!) to taste.
8)  Old Bay Seasoning, several scoops, use your judgement
9)  dried bay leaves, whole (12 large or 24 small)
10)  brown rice, 1 or 2 pounds
11)  dried beans of your choice, 2 pounds (exactly, not an ounce more or less)  Maybe even one of those 15 bean mixed bags.  I often use dried baby lima beans when I can find them.
12)  ½ bottle of fresh white wine, especially if it was a little too sweet.  (optional)

Step by Step Directions:
            Make yourself a Bloody Mary.  Garnish with celery.
            Take your turkey carcass, neck, giblets, skin, pan drippings, etc. and put in your largest pot and cover with water.  You may have to tear him up, but he won't feel a thing.  He's dead.
            Bring to a boil, then simmer covered for 2 hours or so.  If you have to leave the house, shut off the stove and just leave it covered and turn it back on upon return.
            Strain the liquid (aka the stock) into one (or more) tall containers and put into fridge.  Some hours later when the fat has risen to the top and coagulated you can scrape it off and toss it out (or sell it to someone to make diesel fuel).
            Now the best time to sort the meat from the bones and skin is just a few minutes after the stock is strained for cooking and separating.  The meat will be warm and will fall off the bones easily.  If you stick it into the fridge to do later (like tomorrow) your fingers won't like the cold handling.  Please wash your hands really well before doing this (and again after.  They're going to be a little greasy.).
            If your dog has been a good girl or boy you can give them some skin or gristle, but not bones.  If a poultry bone splinters in your pup you'll never forgive yourself.
            Have another Bloody Mary.
            It's hours later, and the fat is separated from the stock.  Have a nice glass of white wine, maybe a reisling or something from Germany.
            Put the stock back into your big pot and put it on low heat.  Throw in the dried beans.
            Time to chop.  It's going to take a while so put on some music.  That Gnarls Barkley is pretty good.  Do some carrots.  If you get bored do the celery then go back to the carrots.  Then onions and more carrots.  Then shrooms and more carrots.  Dice the leftover turkey meat.  Throw things into the pot as you chop.  Put on another CD.
            Toss in some salt, some Old Bay, the bay leaves, and grind some black pepper.
            Simmer covered on low heat for a couple hours.  Maybe toss in the rest of that wine you were drinking earlier.
            Now you have an option with the brown rice.  You can add it directly to the soup pot with enough additional water, or you can cook it separately and serve the soup over a scoop of rice.  Pick out the bay leaves as you serve.
            Makes 2 to 4 gallons and freezes quite well.
            Now, drive it all over town to your friends but plan a route with all right turns and make sure your tires are fully inflated, your oil is synthetic, your plugs are platinum, and your air filter is clean.  Throw in some injector cleaner for good measure.
2013-05-16 06:12:19 PM  
1 vote:
Recipes or GTFO.
2013-05-16 05:52:20 PM  
1 vote:
Thanks to those of you sharing recipes in this thread. I'll share a success and a disaster just for the hell of it.

The good idea: This turned out to be incredibly greasy, but still tasty and effective. Some friends and I were making some cannabutter and decided to make part of it garlic butter and the other part cinnamon butter. The garlic butter was used as a sauce on a pizza which we topped with chicken, shrimp, roasted garlic, artichoke hearts, mozzarella, and parmesan. We used the remaining garlic butter on bread sticks. The cinnamon butter was used on some bread sticks which were also sprinkled with brown sugar and drizzled with icing.

As for the disaster story, one of the most disgusting things I have ever tasted was when I had the bright idea as a teenager to try combining coffee with Dr. Pepper.
2013-05-16 05:51:56 PM  
1 vote:
Hot ham water.
2013-05-16 05:40:23 PM  
1 vote:
My specialty is making reservations.
2013-05-16 03:18:26 PM  
1 vote:

Diogenes: venison

Only animal made entirely of liver.
2013-05-16 03:03:09 PM  
1 vote:
I'm gonna buy me a roasting chicken & shove a beer can up its ass this weekend!
2013-05-16 03:01:12 PM  
1 vote:
Here's a recipe FOR FUN!

i253.photobucket.comView Full Size

You too can make a festive lute - with just a few simple things you can find around the house!1) First get an empty cigar box. Ask daddy, he might have one. Or mommy too, or maybe one of mommy's "golf" friends can hook you up! If not Mr. Johnson as Smoke N' Stuff can hook you up. Just remind him of the time he sold snuff and a bong to little Billy Baxter down the street. Remind him that you're tight with the Attorney General's office! 2) Decorate the box with glue and construction paper! You may want help with this part because it involves scissors! Plus "help" means you can go watch cartoons while Daddy does all the heavy lifting!3) Make strings with rubber bands! Though it resonates better, fight the urge to go with authentic cat gut.4) There you have it, your very own FESTIVE LUTE! You are ready to be a wandering minstrel! Now the kids at school will treat you like the god that you are! Sing the bullies praises! Practice up and next thing you know...You're going to HOLLYWOOD!
2013-05-16 02:50:33 PM  
1 vote:
I don't think I've make a whole lot of original stuff.

I guess I would want to be remembered as a guy who managed to follow simple instructions most of the time.
2013-05-16 02:49:02 PM  
1 vote:
Ass nachos
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