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(Austin Statesman)   Ever wanted to own your own psychiatric hospital? Well if you have an extra $35 million laying around and don't mind Texas now is your chance   ( divider line
    More: Interesting, Texas, institutions  
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2764 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2013 at 7:39 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2013-05-03 08:30:42 AM  
4 votes:
I used to wash the floors in an all female insane asylum just north of Baton Rouge.  I've never had so much sex in my entire life.  I know there are rules of thumb, like don't stick your tongue in retarded, don't stick your dick in crazy, don't stick your fingers in dead.  I thought I could get away with suspending them because these chicks were never getting out.  And if they did, they'd had so much electroshock therapy (I used to call it electro-cock therapy because I'd strap myself on for a ride during the treatments), their brains were like burnt gas station burritos.  This one chick thought she was a dog - fine with me, if you know what I'm saying.  Boy was I wrong.

Right around 1972, when I was graduating high school and working nights at the asylum, a huge wave of deinstitutionalisation threw the doors open on this place and others like it.  Since then, I've been tracked down by hundreds of crazy women who want to play the blame game now that mind altering drugs have straightened them out enough to participate in photo lineups.  I feel like a god damn war criminal, when I was really just following the status quo of the time.  I try to explain: it was different back then, the rules were different, nobody saw the widespread changes that came, for better or worse.  They don't seem to get it.

Now, though, without institutions to protect us and consumer drugs masking the insane from us, you can't be sure what exactly you're sticking your cock into.  You may have the love of your life on the end of your knob; or you may have some nutcase that's going to push dead field mice into your rectum while your 69'ing.  Bring back the insane asylum, where at least you know what you're getting.
2013-05-03 11:10:56 AM  
1 vote:

automaticman: Does it double as death row in Texas?

Why? Can you tell the difference between a mentally unstable/handicapped person and a Texan?
2013-05-03 07:51:53 AM  
1 vote:
Texas, psychiatric, wouldn't happen to be this building in Austin would it?

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2013-05-03 07:49:59 AM  
1 vote:
I thought A&M would be worth a little more than that.
2013-05-03 07:40:38 AM  
1 vote:
American Horror Story: Texas Psychiatric Hospital
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