Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(PennLive)   America's oldest woman dies again at 113   ( pennlive.com) divider line
8
    More: Sad, oldest person, Pennsylvania, United States, Mrs. Thompson, United Methodist Church  
•       •       •

4041 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Apr 2013 at 6:23 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh voting results for Smartest or Funniest or Return to comments
FirstNationalBastard
2013-04-02 01:45:26 AM  
3 votes:

Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Every time someone is proclaimed the oldest person alive, they always die soon afterward.

I think there's a serial killer on the loose.

Don't you feel time gaining on you?


No, but I do find 10 years has got behind me. No one told me when to run... I missed the starting gun.
FirstNationalBastard
2013-04-02 01:11:37 AM  
3 votes:
Every time someone is proclaimed the oldest person alive, they always die soon afterward.

I think there's a serial killer on the loose.
superdude72
2013-04-02 08:39:55 AM  
2 votes:
I've only lived 40 years, but they sure *feel* like 113. The secret to feeling 113 is to spend a lot of time in meetings.
Krymson Tyde
2013-04-02 06:24:42 AM  
2 votes:

Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Every time someone is proclaimed the oldest person alive, they always die soon afterward.

I think there's a serial killer on the loose.

Don't you feel time gaining on you?

No, but I do find 10 years has got behind me. No one told me when to run... I missed the starting gun.

Hang on to your hopes, my friend. That's an easy thing to say, but if your hope should pass away, simply pretend That you can build them again!

I have my books and my poetry to protect me. I am shielded in my armor. Hiding in my room, safe within my womb, I touch no one and no one touches me.

You say for you there's no relief, but I swear I'll prove you wrong. Don't stay in your lonely room, just staring back in silent gloom. That's not where you belong!


Christ, would you two just get a room already?
Ed Grubermann [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2013-04-02 01:18:57 PM  
1 vote:

starlost: why don't we celebrate the world's youngest person?


andythesaint.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
whammypower788
2013-04-02 08:35:58 AM  
1 vote:
img.gawkerassets.comView Full Size


The woman twice dead.

/She doesn't look THAT old.
//I could go for a souffle right about now...
L.D. Ablo [TotalFark]
2013-04-02 04:11:24 AM  
1 vote:

BKITU: L.D. Ablo: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 250x286]
/obligatory

Keep in mind, she was of the few who could have called Abe a whippersnapper and ordered him to vacate himself from her lawn.


Nobody talks about Abe that way.  What's gotten into you?
FirstNationalBastard
2013-04-02 02:09:16 AM  
1 vote:

Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Darth_Lukecash: FirstNationalBastard: Every time someone is proclaimed the oldest person alive, they always die soon afterward.

I think there's a serial killer on the loose.

Don't you feel time gaining on you?

No, but I do find 10 years has got behind me. No one told me when to run... I missed the starting gun.

Hang on to your hopes, my friend. That's an easy thing to say, but if your hope should pass away, simply pretend That you can build them again!


I have my books and my poetry to protect me. I am shielded in my armor. Hiding in my room, safe within my womb, I touch no one and no one touches me.
 
Displayed 8 of 8 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Redisplay/refresh voting results for Smartest or Funniest or Return to comments
This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

If you like these links, you'll love

TotalFark

More funny for your money.

learn more | sign up

Report
On Twitter

Report
Top Commented
Top Commented ▼
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.

  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.
Report