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(Daily Mail)   At last you can celebrate the REAL meaning of Easter - with Jesus eggs. Jesus   ( dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Stupid, Easter, Waitrose, Hereford, supermarkets  
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9704 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Mar 2013 at 9:48 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-03-04 09:24:54 AM  
5 votes:
landoverbaptist.orgView Full Size
2013-03-04 09:19:00 AM  
4 votes:

That's the holiday where Jesus comes out of his tomb after 3 days and if he sees his shadow its 6 more
weeks of winter, right?
2013-03-04 08:15:19 AM  
4 votes:
Still too pagan.

sarcasticxtian.comView Full Size

There we go.
2013-03-04 10:29:38 AM  
3 votes:

Prank Call of Cthulhu: There needs to be an Easter version of Krampus.

i30.photobucket.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 10:12:50 AM  
3 votes:
On the other hand google image search for "Jesus Eggs" provides gems like this:

i42.tinypic.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 09:59:21 AM  
3 votes:
This has rekindled my lack of interest.
2013-03-04 09:52:48 AM  
3 votes:
I had no idea that Jesuses laid eggs.
2013-03-04 08:59:06 AM  
3 votes:
Are they dinosaur eggs?
2013-03-04 01:12:21 PM  
2 votes:

Real Women Drink Akvavit: dickfreckle: Have any of you Americans (I'm one) been to a Tescos? I know it's just a grocery store and should be just like shopping in the US with other whiteys, but that chain bewildered me. There I was, all educated and sh*t, trying figure out the basics of getting groceries.

/has problems at the local supermarket, too, so it's probably just me

Yeah, it's probably just you. Menfolk like you were one of the reasons the desperate old maid ladies' magazines used to tell the womenfolk one of the best places to meet an eligible man was at the grocery store, usually staring all frightened and confused at the wonderful, spherical things that were not boobs.

/like a deer in headlights, some of ya are
//especially if you're thinking about boobs

Hey, I was only staring intently at the frozen orange juice because I'd read the label and it said "concentrate."
2013-03-04 12:56:31 PM  
2 votes:
The real meaning of Easter is "Always look on the bright side of life".
2013-03-04 10:56:16 AM  
2 votes:

vudukungfu: Kinder Eggs > easter eggs.

i.onfinite.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 10:42:36 AM  
2 votes:
wow do people biatch and moan. there are a lot of really special Holy Days the Church has already ceased. how quickly they forget!

Wycliffe the Heretic Book Burning Day
Dead Languages: Great Unwashed Uneducated Can't Read Teh Bible Week
Get Out Of Jail Free: Indulgences = Donations Sunday, Sunday, Sunday
Knights Templar Killed, We Take Your Stuff January Bring-A-Cake Celebration
Galileo House Arrest Pot Luck Dinner
Joan of Arc July Bar-B-Q
Jan Hus Burnt Stake Dinner
William Tyndale Burnt Stake Bible Summer Camp
Inquisition Convert or Die Church Membership Drive
Medieval Witch Hunts Fun Times Remembrance Mass
2013-03-04 10:22:50 AM  
2 votes:

Slaxl: I don't know wtf eggs have to do with Easter,

Silly, Jesus hides eggs, and you have to say "trick or treat" to get them, or else you'll get coal in your stocking.
2013-03-04 10:06:35 AM  
2 votes:

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Sybarite: Still too pagan.

[sarcasticxtian.com image 550x411]

There we go.

Does the chocolate cross repel vampires? Or maybe is it only effective on Blackulas?

images.starpulse.comView Full Size

"Oh no you did NOT just go there!"
2013-03-04 10:01:23 AM  
2 votes:
So the guy can walk on water and lays chocolate eggs?  And to think all this time I've been flushing my eggs down the toilet
2013-03-04 08:21:22 AM  
2 votes:
Congratulations on your major victory. This is truly important. Really. Truly.
2013-03-04 06:14:30 PM  
1 vote:
4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 03:35:48 PM  
1 vote:

Parthenogenetic: Jument: No, Jesus does not lay eggs. God reproduces asexually.

Parthenogenetically, perhaps?

So when people say "Jesus H. Christ," the H stands for haploid?
2013-03-04 02:54:59 PM  
1 vote:
No, Jesus does not lay eggs. God reproduces asexually.
2013-03-04 01:54:59 PM  
1 vote:
Is this where Richard Attenborough finds some fossilised Jesus DNA in amber, clones him into an ostrich egg, and creates the reincarnation of Satan when he realises he's mixed up the genetic sequencing?
2013-03-04 01:08:41 PM  
1 vote:

uncoveror: The real meaning of Easter is "Always look on the bright side of life".


dee dee, dede, dedede dee
2013-03-04 12:43:19 PM  
1 vote:

trappedspirit: Has anyone pointed out yet that Christian holidays seem to have been strategically placed on the calendar to coincide with the holidays of other religions that Christians wanted to convert?  Because I'd like to be the first person in history to point this out and claim the prize.

Here you go:

+1 Intardweb
2013-03-04 12:15:44 PM  
1 vote:
i.imgur.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 12:05:55 PM  
1 vote:
This thread useless without

i46.tinypic.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 11:52:18 AM  
1 vote:

stonicus: Easter is a celebration of the first zombie!!

I think that as an undead magic user, Jesus is technically a litch.
2013-03-04 11:00:04 AM  
1 vote:

texdent: The true meaning of Easter

While the penis-encumbered me loved that video of Kate Upton, the borderline-OCD dad me nearly had a panic attack watching her roll around in all that Easter "grass." Gah. I hate that stuff. I find it scattered throughout the house well past Saint Swithins day.
2013-03-04 10:35:29 AM  
1 vote:
We get it, you hate christians.

How edgy.
2013-03-04 10:20:29 AM  
1 vote:
Have a sexy Easter!

i.imgur.comView Full Size

And one for the ladies.

i.imgur.comView Full Size
2013-03-04 10:15:05 AM  
1 vote:
s15.postimage.orgView Full Size
2013-03-04 10:08:50 AM  
1 vote:

Wyckyd Sceptre: www.landoverbaptist.org

I think I'm going to come up with a spicy meatball dish, really really spicy with a sirachi based sauce and call them Satan's Testicles.

fruitloop: I had no idea that Jesuses laid eggs.

They make a wickedly good omelet.
2013-03-04 09:57:13 AM  
1 vote:
I may be an atheist but i'm all for people having religious holidays as they like. It seems silly to me that we should insist the religious aspects of Christmas be stripped away. It's their holiday. I don't know wtf eggs have to do with Easter, but it's clear their plan isn't about reconnecting children with Jesus' eggs, it's about reminding people that Easter isn't about eggs, it's about Jesus death and resurrection  If they want to fight back against rampant commercialisation stripping their holy times of all meaning then I support that.

Right up until the day religion is abolished I'll be completely in support of equality amongst religions. Then every day I can have a chocolate egg, no longer will it be bound by the oppressive chains of a religious holiday, but free to roam the shelves in traditionally un-eggy months like May, August, even September! This is a good thing.

Now I have to go and buy some chocolate eggs, because I love them more than muslims love Mohammed.
2013-03-04 09:52:43 AM  
1 vote:
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