If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Dumbass Daily)   Teen wins biggest balls competition, shows cops black underwear that belonged to the woman he was sleeping with--the wife of a Navy SEAL   ( dumbassdaily.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Navy SEALs, fitness instructor  
•       •       •

20531 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jan 2013 at 10:29 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-01-31 10:34:59 AM  
3 votes:
i.dailymail.co.ukView Full Size
www3.pictures.stylebistro.comView Full Size

/would Malcolm her middle
2013-01-31 11:23:27 AM  
2 votes:

Stephen_Falken: I screwed a seal's wife but I was 21.

Yeah, but this was a NAVY seal.
2013-01-31 11:19:38 AM  
2 votes:

Stephen_Falken: I screwed a seal's wife but I was 21.

Did you know she was a seal when you had sex with her?
2013-01-31 10:47:22 AM  
2 votes:
When caught the teen said, "that's just ice cream."
2013-01-31 10:32:44 AM  
2 votes:
She's got that retarded look, what with her eyes so close together.

fitness instructor

Sounds about right.
2013-01-31 09:48:43 AM  
2 votes:
Seals are a bunch of pussies

/this posting done in jest anonymously behind the security of 7 proxies

//please don't hurt me
2013-01-31 06:27:57 PM  
1 vote:

I was sleeping with this girl I just started dating several years back and woke up to a really loud banging on the door at her place.

She looked *very worried* and said it might be her ex husband.

From the look on her face, I figured he might have roughed her up before (she was terrified), so I get out of bed and head off to the door to investigate with the intent that if it *was* him, I was going to kick his lily ass if he so much as looked at her in a menacing way.

Turns out it was just the maintenance guys telling us they were turning off the furnace and there wouldn't be any hot water for a while.

She then proceeds to tell me her ex husband was a Navy SEAL (she was being honest) and that he never hit her, but she was worried what he'd do to me even though they were divorced for a few years.

-I was in the Navy for a short time myself and had several years of Kempo and Kung Fu (from world champions in both, which is why I wasn't worried about some random guy beating on the door). Twice in my life, I've had to defend one of my idiot friends from multiple guys coming after them, once 3 guys, another time 5 guys (drunk frat guys both times oddly enough). -I'm not afraid of getting my ass kicked or kicking someone else's ass if necessary to defend someone I care for.

But to be honest, I had a sinking feeling in my stomach after she told me that. I even remember feeling my bowels loosen.

No Internet Tough Guy stuff here... I would never knowingly get in a fight with a Navy SEAL unless I had no choice. I thanked God that day it *wasn't* him.
2013-01-31 12:05:18 PM  
1 vote:
The eyebrows are seriously jacked up, but man is she hot.

Definitely would do--especially at 15.  It would be a terrible 2 seconds for her.
2013-01-31 11:07:36 AM  
1 vote:

js34603: Mr.BobDobalita: would.

Is that the guy from the Hangover?

I believe that would be Mr. SEAL.
2013-01-31 11:02:58 AM  
1 vote:
Stupid kid blew a good thing by using someone elses phone to chat her up.
It's like these kids don't like sex nowadays.
2013-01-31 10:41:33 AM  
1 vote:

colon_pow: need pics of his balls.

nasailor.comView Full Size
2013-01-31 10:32:34 AM  
1 vote:
legacy-cdn.smosh.comView Full Size

again, life imitates art.
2013-01-31 09:52:56 AM  
1 vote:
...and no one ever heard from him again.
Displayed 13 of 13 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.