Majick Thise: Have ONE and ONLY ONE child.Seriously.. If you have one it's a fun hobby. Work yeah but good work.BUT the work load when you add a second kid doesn't just double.. oh no. It increases by an order of magnitude. Let's use the term 'work unit' as a measure of the work you do when having a child. If a single child is 10 work units a day, two children are 75 work units a day..No one ever listens to me on this, maybe you will be the first.
azmoviez: Can't figure out HTML on the mobile app but this article is super important so you don't go mad reading to your child:http://m.deadspin.com/5889376/if-you-give-a-mouse-a-cookie-youre-fark e d-10-tips-for-avoiding-terrible-childrens-booksOh and scheduling our kids sleep (Baby Wise) was the best. She slept through the night at 8 weeks.
Ceteris Paribus says: sgt cyanide: kids are special.I picked my kids up tonight, and when I walked into my daughter's classroom she was hiding with another girl in a fort so she didn't see me. I was talking to the teacher and Tori heard my voice, peaked out, saw me and lit up. She burst of the fort and yelled DAAAAAAADDDDEEEEEEEEEEE and ran into my arms and gave me a great big hug.
Flatulent_Flea: They're all cute 'n stuff until they wreck the car.
gunsmack: When changing a boy, put a washcloth on it or he will pee all over you and everything else.
jpo2269: Your children are never too young to learn about disappointment.
Clarence Beeks: Always have three bottles of formula/breast milk ready in the fridge. Putting those things together in the dark at 3am can get very messy. Grabbing a pre-made version out of the fridge is easy.
rotsky: During labor and delivery, position yourself in such a way that you can help and support your wife. Do it in such a way that you don't actually see the baby coming out. There's nothing to be seen there that can't be unseen. Trust me.Wait until the doctors clean everything up.
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