If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(SF Weekly)   Meet the man who had sex with a dolphin, among other animals, who is also sad he cannot get a job   ( blogs.sfweekly.com) divider line
    More: Sick, sexual intercourses  
•       •       •

19124 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Jan 2013 at 6:46 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

240 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Newest | Show all

2013-01-07 02:56:58 PM  
I'm not sure if that beats sex with an armadillo, or not.
2013-01-07 03:07:06 PM  
To be fair, a male dolphin will rape people, which is why "Swimming with Dolphins" is usually female dolphins only.

/Haven't read the article yet.
2013-01-07 03:15:40 PM  
Maybe he should think about animal husbandry as a career.
2013-01-07 03:20:05 PM  
He did WHAT on porpoise?
2013-01-07 03:26:05 PM  
Hey it was a FEMALE dolphin. It's not like he was a homo or something.
2013-01-07 03:28:21 PM  
FTFA - "gently stroking one of the two cats occupying the room with us".

That's just sick. The guy never stops.
2013-01-07 03:33:43 PM  

phlegmmo: Maybe he should think about animal husbandry as a career.

He doesn't want to be tied down.
2013-01-07 03:34:25 PM  
Flipper?  You flip 'er...
2013-01-07 03:37:00 PM  
Unuh. Unuhunuh. Unuh.
follybeach.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 03:54:29 PM  
ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 03:59:04 PM  
25.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 04:02:36 PM  
Maybe he was just looking for some tuna but got caught in a net with a dolphin.
2013-01-07 04:05:10 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Unuh. Unuhunuh. Unuh.
[www.follybeach.com image 499x297]

Those seductive eyes. Quit tempting me, you hussy of the sea!
2013-01-07 04:14:44 PM  

St_Francis_P: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Unuh. Unuhunuh. Unuh.
[www.follybeach.com image 499x297]

Those seductive eyes. Quit tempting me, you hussy of the sea!

Actually, if you read the article, that's pretty much what he says. Also, the dolphin had "a reputation".

/I wish I was kidding
//I also wish I could un-read something
2013-01-07 04:16:25 PM  
Mr. Brenner, we're going to be covering a lot of subjects in great deal of detail over the course of thi interview, but I'd like to begin completely out of context by asking you one question, more than any other, almost every American and people all over the world want me to ask. Did you put it in the blowhole or the va-jay-jay?

It was vaginal sex. Vaginal sex. Blowholes are for breathing. Sometimes male dolphins do each other in the blowhole, but you wouldn't find me trying to do that.

Well, of course not, because sticking it in the blowhole would be gay.

/ Usually I'd say NTTAWWT but in this case....
2013-01-07 04:24:58 PM  
img708.imageshack.usView Full Size

Hey y'all.
2013-01-07 04:31:22 PM  

Godscrack: [img708.imageshack.us image 628x476]
Hey y'all.

Given the content of TFA, I should have expected to see this meme in here.
2013-01-07 04:36:06 PM  
He's too old to be a dolphin whore now.
2013-01-07 04:45:06 PM  
That guy totally doesn't look like he does sexytimes with a dolphin. Nuh-uh. Nope.
2013-01-07 04:48:43 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 04:56:56 PM  
*scans headline*

i.chzbgr.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 04:57:03 PM  
20 comments and no Red Hot Chilli Peppers reference. For shame farkers, for shame
2013-01-07 05:02:35 PM  
Don Knotts would have been impressed.
2013-01-07 05:10:11 PM  
Proof that all dolphins want do is to muck about in the water in order to have a good time.

/So long and thanks for all the fish
2013-01-07 05:36:00 PM  
This dolphin would like a word. Then a turn.

dtdstudios.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 06:13:06 PM  
Once you go blowhole...
2013-01-07 06:17:02 PM  
HMMM...midget dolphin BDSM
2013-01-07 06:47:26 PM  
No Hank Hill? Fark! I am disappoint.
2013-01-07 06:49:52 PM  
Ya know, I've read a lot of icky stuff on the internet, but I'm not gonna read about this guy.
2013-01-07 06:50:53 PM  
i137.photobucket.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 06:51:16 PM  
He could get a job in a sex lab
2013-01-07 06:54:44 PM  
It can never be said enough- you want good oral sex don't date a dolphin. And that blowhole thing: it's not what you think it's for.
2013-01-07 06:55:52 PM  
Maybe dolphin sex doesn't fit in with some company cultures.
2013-01-07 06:56:40 PM  
He could get a reality show at MTV.
2013-01-07 06:57:30 PM  
I had a picture of what this guy would look like before I clicked. Not dead on, but pretty close.
/nice sweater, unemployed dolphin-farker.
2013-01-07 06:59:07 PM  
They killed flipper?

2013-01-07 06:59:56 PM  
Dolphin-farking pervert cannot get a job.
Nothing to see here, citizen.
2013-01-07 07:01:29 PM  
I think I read this in a Carl Hiaasen book once.
2013-01-07 07:01:53 PM  
San Francisco. What a surprise.
2013-01-07 07:05:11 PM  
Does not approve:
images.tvrage.comView Full Size
2013-01-07 07:06:45 PM  
Interspecies erotica thread!
2013-01-07 07:07:35 PM  
So dolphin farking makes him not a good fit with the cultures of many offices? This one I can stand behind because, eww, dolphin farking. At least try and be respectable about your beast farking.
2013-01-07 07:08:00 PM  
So it never got kinky?

Isn't sex with a dolphin kinky enough, Matt?

Ok, I lol'd.
2013-01-07 07:09:53 PM  
What the fark did I just read...
2013-01-07 07:09:56 PM  
FTFA: Brenner was raised in a family that believed in the works of Wilhelm Reich, the Austrian psychoanalyst who believed in preventing the "armoring" of children from birth through a process called "vegetotherapy," which looked to establish a patient's "orgasm reflex" and "orgastic potency," which Reich described as "The ability for total surrender to the involuntary contractions of the organism and the complete discharge of the excitation at the acme of the genital embrace."

I kind of feel bad for the guy, he was molested at a young age, and was forced into a cult. His parents never did anything about it. No wonder he is screwed up. Since the cult had to deal with psychology, he probably has huge trust issues with the field to get any sort of help.
2013-01-07 07:10:14 PM  
Well, at least he didn't drop acid with the dolphin while trying to make it learn English.

/government experiments are hilarious
//Source, item 4
2013-01-07 07:11:36 PM  
He should write a Broadway Play...

Dolphinf*cker, The Musical

It's be huge...-ly empty during it's run!

// LOLING at this
2013-01-07 07:11:42 PM  
emotibot.netView Full Size
2013-01-07 07:12:14 PM  
This isn't that weird creeper that was on reddit, was it?

...That sounds really vague, actually.
2013-01-07 07:12:46 PM  

bugmn99: So it never got kinky?

Isn't sex with a dolphin kinky enough, Matt?

Ok, I lol'd.

So did I. A lot.
Displayed 50 of 240 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Newest | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.