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(The Awl)   Lies to tell your children about Santa Claus   ( theawl.com) divider line
    More: PSA, Santa Claus  
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354 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 14 Dec 2012 at 11:11 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

5 Comments     (+0 »)
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2012-12-14 11:22:39 AM  
I prefer spreading the horrible news of Robot Santa Claus.
2012-12-14 01:33:11 PM  
Santa Claus is a ninja. Makes complete sense.
2012-12-14 05:16:32 PM  

Kristoph57: I prefer spreading the horrible news of Robot Santa Claus.

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"Thousands of years ago, before the dawn of Man as we knew him, there was Sir Santa of Claus, an ape-like creature making crude and pointless toys out of dinobones and his own waste, hurling them at chimp-like creatures with crinkled hands regardless of how they behaved the previous year. These so-called 'toys' were buried as witches, and defecated upon, and hurled at predators when wakened by the searing grunts of children. It wasn't a holly jolly Christmas that year, for many were killed..."
2012-12-15 04:12:50 AM  
Maybe we should start injecting the rumor that santa is a good muslim.

That will torque off the parents that shouldn't be using him to celebrate their second holiest day of the year.
2012-12-15 01:41:48 PM  
I don't see how kids these days could possibly believe in Santa anyway. Every single TV show, cartoon special and movie that's come out in the last 15 or so years gives a completely different account of how he does things, from how he makes all the toys to how he gets in houses without chimneys and so on. It's pretty much ruined the whole idea.
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