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(Daily Mail)   New breath test diagnoses colon cancer. Your ass wants a Tic Tac   ( dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Interesting, volatile organic compounds, stool tests, cancer types, Open University, rectum, colon cancers, constipation, cancer screening  
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1423 clicks; posted to Geek » on 05 Dec 2012 at 6:00 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2012-12-05 06:56:41 PM  
3 votes:
My Most Favorite Post In The World (and relevant to this thread):

About half an hour ago, I farted. Sitting at my computer as I do most of the time, this is something I've grown used to. But this fart really farking stank. Seriously, it was like eleven dead animals with shiat mixed in. I was sick and tired of having farts smell so terrible. But did I do what the sensible person would do, get up and wait for it to disperse, perhaps taking with me the resolution to change my diet to better influence my smells? No, I did not. I took what I consider to be the alternate route.

I stuck a mint up my ass.

I figured that since it dissolves in saliva, my ass would serve a fair job of dissolving it, thus lining my colon with a nice minty extract and making my farts the kind that girls would like to make out with. Somewhere along the line however, I did not work out how the mint would be absorbed into the walls.

Anyway, around 20 minutes passed, and I had to fart again. Being of a scientific mind, I decided this would be where to prove or disprove my hypothesis, so I let her rip.

Oh God. It wasn't a fart, it was a farking butt sneeze.

The mint had dissolved, that much was clear. But what was left was spearmint jelly mixed with shiat, and it was all over my boxers and running down my leg as I ran to the bathroom. I cleaned up my boxers as best I could, scrubbed my leg, and tossed the underwear into the wash. So overall an embarassing experience, and one I wouldn't want to relive.

However, it was worth noting:
That shiat jelly smelled farking awesome.
2012-12-05 03:16:27 PM  
2 votes:
ewpopwatch.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

Exxcuse me, sir. Would you have a mint? Perhaps some Binaca?
2012-12-05 01:14:08 PM  
2 votes:
"I'd like to buy a bowel, Pat."
2012-12-05 07:09:02 PM  
1 vote:
So what's next? Dentists checking for cavities with a fart test?
2012-12-05 06:26:09 PM  
1 vote:
"All clear. You're good to go!"
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2012-12-05 03:17:52 PM  
1 vote:
i236.photobucket.comView Full Size

Does not approve
2012-12-05 02:12:16 PM  
1 vote:
Gives new meaning to your breath smells like ass.
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