If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Buzzfeed)   The 10 Commandments Of Awesome Hot Chocolate: never ever use powder   ( buzzfeed.com) divider line
    More: Advice, whisk, brown sugars, half-and-half, nutmeg  
•       •       •

15646 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2012 at 3:58 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-12-04 04:10:36 PM  
4 votes:
Step 1 - think about making hot chocolate
Step 2 - remember that you're an adult
Step 3 - drink a glass of Scotch instead
2012-12-04 04:42:37 PM  
2 votes:
Proper way to make hot chocolate:

1) Open beer and pour into glass of choice.
2) Start drinking your beer as you find a coffee mug.
3) Add packet of instant hot chocolate to mug and fill 2/3 full of water - microwave for 50 seconds.
4) Sip your beer as you wait for microwave to finish.
5) Remove hot chocolate, give it a stir, throw in too many marshmallows and 2 coffee straws.
6) Give hot chocolate to your 5 year old boy and laugh as he goes nuts because of the extra marshmallows.
7) Cuddle up with your kid and enjoy your beer while watching cartoons.
2012-12-04 04:14:13 PM  
2 votes:
So instead of saying "Hey, here's a cool way to make hot chocolate." the article goes the route of "This is the only way to make hot chocolate, and your way sucks."
2012-12-04 04:10:08 PM  
2 votes:
Steps for making good hot chocolate:

1) Make hot chocolate however the fark you want. Power tends to be easiest.
2) Pour in Peppermint Schnapps, Rumbpelminze, Bailey's, or spirit of choice into mixture to taste
3) Drink and enjoy your hot chocolate 15 minutes before the pretentious farks are even done getting the ingredients
2012-12-04 04:06:20 PM  
2 votes:
KER-RIST! Must you anal-retentives turn every simple little thing into a harrowing ordeal?
2012-12-04 02:08:21 PM  
2 votes:

FishyFred: /white chocolate is right out

White chocolate is what's left after you take chocolate and remove everything that makes chocolate good.
2012-12-04 01:33:28 PM  
2 votes:
If you really like chocolate, and you've ever had the super-rich, super-intense hot chocolate at the famous Angelina cafe in Paris (or similar places in France and Italy), you'll never want to have anything else:

jodyrobbins.comView Full Size

It's think and intense--it tastes like a liquified chocolate bar--and it's delicious, as long as you're really into chocolate. Of course, you can't drink it too often, or it will kill you. Here's the recipe:

3/4 cup of whole milk
1/4 cup of heavy cream
4 oz of really good dark (at least 72%) chocolate (not Hershey's or Ghirardelli or similar mass-market crap--think something at least of the quality of Scharfenberger or Valrhona, or better)
1 teaspoon of confectioner's sugar

Use a double-boiler to heat the milk and cream, when it gets warm, throw in the sugar and chocolate (cut into small chunks). Whisk as chocolate melts, until smooth (and until it looks like the picture above). Serve when it just starting to get to the boiling point, or just below. Whipped cream on top is optional.

You will not be sorry. But only, as I said above, if you really like chocolate. As I do. But a warning: After having this, every other hot chocolate will taste like Swiss Miss or Nestle's cocoa.
2012-12-04 01:30:05 PM  
2 votes:
Hey, some Swiss Miss in a mug with a bunch of marshmallows is good enough for me, snobmitter. It's hot chocolate. It doesn't need to be fancy. It's supposed to be hot and chocolaty.
2012-12-04 05:24:01 PM  
1 vote:

emiliogtz: I like my chocolate to be bitter.

You are wrong. That is all.
2012-12-04 05:21:45 PM  
1 vote:
Honestly... nothing is more satisfying to me when I want hot chocolate than Swiss Miss hot cocoa packets with the tiny marshmallows in, and I use water. Nostalgia and ease mean a tremendous amount for enjoyment.
2012-12-04 05:10:28 PM  
1 vote:

Cyberluddite: If you really like chocolate, and you've ever had the super-rich, super-intense hot chocolate at the famous Angelina cafe in Paris (or similar places in France and Italy), you'll never want to have anything else:

That's like saying if I fark a supermodel in Paris, I'll never want to fark anyone else. If Swiss Miss is the only thing in the cupboard or if the homely girl is the only one left at the bar...I'll take it
2012-12-04 04:59:20 PM  
1 vote:
4 ounces of chocolate? Pansies!
img812.imageshack.usView Full Size
2012-12-04 04:54:36 PM  
1 vote:
Thanks subby, great find. Next time I want to spend half my morning making and cleaning up after my drink, I'll ask you for advice.
2012-12-04 04:51:15 PM  
1 vote:
...but first make sure it organic whole milk from a local artisinal dairy, and shade-grown fair-trade cocoa sustainably harvested by co-op owners.

fark all that:
1) Hershey's Syrup
2) Milk
3) Microwave

Drink it. Done!
2012-12-04 04:26:52 PM  
1 vote:

Le Bomb Suprize: evilmrsock: Pocket Ninja: 1) Melt down an iron skillet's worth of Three Musketeers bars.
2) Pour melted chocolate and nougat into a glass of milk.
3) BAM. Tell the results don't shock you.

... It's you, so, my default reaction is that this must be a TERRIBLE idea.

... but it's YOU, so, what if it's actually THE BEST idea?

My reaction as well. There is a fine line between genius and stupid and this recipe might be either.

fark it, my wife's closing tonight. She can't stop me. I'm gonna have a salad, eat a steak, melt down 3 bars of 3 Musketeers, and drink it. MAYBE I'LL EVEN USE THE MINT ONES.

If i don't post back in this thread, send my wife flowers.
2012-12-04 04:25:30 PM  
1 vote:
3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
2012-12-04 04:25:16 PM  
1 vote:
1 tablespoon of top-shelf cocoa powder
2 tablespoons of sugar
about 1 oz of milk

put the sugar and the powder in a big mug. Slowly add the milk and stir like crazy until there's a smooth brown paste at the bottom of the mug.

Boil some water and top up the mug about 3/4 of the way, stirring the whole time to dissolve the paste

Top up with some cold milk or whipped cream.

De-farkin'-licious. No melting, ho hassle, no double boilers. Beats the hell out of instant hot chocklit powder.
2012-12-04 04:10:23 PM  
1 vote:
"7. You can use cornstarch to make the hot chocolate extra silky-smooth (optional)."

No, you can't. This is far worse than using dried cocoa (though I know of some really good ones that make excellent hot chocolate). Hot chocolate should contain both milk and heavy cream (two parts milk to one part cream). You first scald the milk very slightly, add the chocolate and sugar, and stir constantly until the chocolate is melted. Then add cream and heat gently until the the solution reduces and thickens a bit. Finally, add some vanilla or a liqueur such as Grand Marnier, Chambord, or whatever you desire.
2012-12-04 04:04:32 PM  
1 vote:
3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

My favorite
2012-12-04 03:34:08 PM  
1 vote:

Cyberluddite: If you really like chocolate, and you've ever had the super-rich, super-intense hot chocolate at the famous Angelina cafe in Paris (or similar places in France and Italy), you'll never want to have anything else:


You went to a cafe in Europe and all you had was hot chocolate? Not even with a nip of brandy in it?

2012-12-04 02:43:01 PM  
1 vote:
Recipe: Hot Cocoa

Jack Bishop mentioned this recipe on today's Fresh Air and we couldn't help but get the entire recipe.

Serves 4 in small mugs

Why This Recipe Works

Our ideal hot cocoa recipe would give us serious chocolate flavor and a rich, satisfying consistency. We found that 1 1/2 tablespoons of cocoa powder sweetened with 1 tablespoon of sugar added enough chocolate flavor to our hot cocoa recipe without being overpowering. Many recipes recommend mixing cocoa powder and sugar with a little water before adding the milk, and we found this to be worthwhile. Water has the effect of releasing the cocoa powder's fruit, chocolate, and coffee flavor nuances. We also discovered that heating the mixture of cocoa powder, sugar, and water for two minutes before adding milk further deepens the flavor.

If you want to increase or decrease this recipe for hot cocoa, the key ratio to remember is one and one-half tablespoons of cocoa and one heaping tablespoon of sugar per cup of liquid. If you have whole milk on hand rather than low-fat, go ahead and use it, omitting the half-and-half.


6 tablespoons Dutch-processed cocoa powder, measured by dip-and-sweep
4 tablespoons granulated sugar
Pinch table salt
1cup water
3 cups low-fat milk (1 or 2 percent)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 cup half-and-half


1. In heavy 2-quart saucepan, whisk together cocoa, sugar, salt, and water over low heat until smooth. Simmer, whisking continuously, for 2 minutes, making sure whisk gets into the edges of pan.

2. Add milk, increase heat to medium-low, and cook, stirring occasionally with whisk, until steam rises from surface and tiny bubbles form around edge, 12 to 15 minutes. Do not boil.

3. Add vanilla and half-and-half. For foamy cocoa, beat hot cocoa with hand mixer or transfer to blender and blend until foamy. Divide between four mugs, top with whipped cream or marshmallows if desired, and serve immediately.
2012-12-04 01:53:18 PM  
1 vote:
Okay, listen... that's all really well and good. I understand that it makes a better cup of hot chocolate than Swiss Miss.

But it's a lot of work. Caribou Coffee is a five minute walk from my office and uses real bits of chocolate, not powder. It's fast and simple, even though they pour the chocolate in the milk and then steam it all together. I can get some kind of flavor shot if I'm feeling it -- dark chocolate + cherry flavor shot = Black Forest Hot Chocolate.

And even though I prefer dark chocolate like the article suggests, there's nothing wrong with the milk chocolate version. It's a comfort drink. Whatever floats your boat.

/white chocolate is right out
2012-12-04 01:18:08 PM  
1 vote:
Damn food snobs.

static.caloriecount.about.comView Full Size
2012-12-04 01:10:21 PM  
1 vote:
lovechoco.orgView Full Size
Bonus: you get to use a hammer.
2012-12-04 12:50:55 PM  
1 vote:
Campton Place Hot Chocolate


2 cups whole milk
1/2 cup cream
2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1 recipe Master Ganache, recipe follows, using 2 cups cream instead of 1
1/2 teaspoon Tia Maria or vanilla extract
Whipped cream, for serving
Chocolate shavings, for serving


Bring the milk, cream, and cocoa powder to a boil in a small saucepan over medium heat. When it reaches a boil, remove from the heat, and add the ganache. Let sit for 1 minute, then stir well until combined, about 4 minutes. Stir in the Tia Maria or vanilla.

Serve the hot chocolate right away as is or store it covered in the refrigerator for up to 2 weeks. It can be reheated easily on the stovetop or in the microwave. If you wish, top with whipped cream and chocolate shavings.

Master Ganache:

Can deep, dark, intense, rich, velvety smooth chocolate be a spiritual experience? It certainly is heavenly when mixed with cream. Praise the pastry angels and pass the bonbons!

This is the basic ganache recipe. Use it for truffles, tarts, fillings, you name it. Follow the same technique when adjusting the recipe for firm and soft ganache. An alternative food processor method is given, which can be applied to any ganache recipe in this chapter.

My desire is not only to introduce you to ganache but also to make it a staple in your refrigerator. As long as you don't eat it all as a midnight snack, it can be available to help you throw together dessert at a moment's notice.

8 ounces bittersweet chocolate

1 cup heavy cream

Using a serrated knife, finely chop the chocolate into 1/4-inch pieces. Don't be lazy here. Big chunks will not melt.

Traditional method: Place the chocolate in a medium heatproof bowl. Bring the cream to a boil in a small saucepan over medium heat. Boiling means the cream will actually rise up in the pan and threaten to boil over.

Immediately pour the boiling cream over the chopped chocolate. Tap the bowl on the counter to settle the chocolate into the cream, then let it sit for 1 minute. Using a rubber spatula, slowly stir in a circular motion, starting from the center of the bowl, and working out to the sides. Be careful not to add too much air to the ganache. Stir until all the chocolate is melted, about 2 minutes. It may look done after 1 minute of stirring, but keep going to be sure it's emulsified.

Food processor method: Place the chopped chocolate in a food processor fitted with the steel blade. Bring the cream to a boil in a small saucepan over medium heat (or bring to a boil in the microwave.)

Immediately pour the hot cream into the food processor, on top of the chocolate. Let sit for 1 minute, then pulse the machine 3 times. Scrape down the sides with a rubber spatula and pulse 3 more times, until all the chocolate is melted. This smooth, silky chocolate is now ganache. Transfer the ganache to a bowl.

Let the ganache sit at room temperature until it cools to 70 degrees F. In a 65 degree F room, this will take approximately 4 hours or 2 hours in the refrigerator. You can speed up the process by pouring the ganache out onto a clean baking sheet (thinner layers cool faster.) Once the ganache reaches 70 degrees F, it is ready to be used. At this point it can be covered and stored in the refrigerator for up to 2 weeks.

Yield: 2 cups

Prep Time: 5 minutes

Cook Time: 10 minutes

Inactive Prep Time: 2 to 4 hours

Ease of preparation: Easy


I have only ever used this recipe to make hot chocolate, so I have no others to use for comparison. However, this recipe makes some reeeeeaaaaly good hot chocolate.
Displayed 25 of 25 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.