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(Slate)   A guide to making yourself less creepy via body language   ( slate.com) divider line
27
    More: PSA, John Jay College, Malcolm Gladwell, nonverbal communication, Neil Strauss, dating, habits  
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21010 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Dec 2012 at 11:38 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
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that was my nickname in highschool [BareFark]
2012-12-03 11:49:03 AM  
8 votes:
Being interested but poor is a sure-fire way to creep a woman out.
StaleCoffee
2012-12-03 12:13:46 PM  
5 votes:

Pants full of macaroni!!: I'm mid-40s, ugly and never-been-married. There is no cure for this kind of creepy.


Yes there is, it's called money.
DaCaptain19
2012-12-03 12:14:50 PM  
4 votes:
"People feel weird when they meet me," 27-year-old Blake Eastman tells me.

The first sentence of TFA tells me this person has failed in the very subject for which he gives advice.
pkellmey
2012-12-03 12:42:17 PM  
3 votes:

meat0918: Guess the moral is, don't be a creepy ass dude.


Or, more likely, find women who are attracted to creepy ass dudes.
MassAsster
2012-12-03 12:23:58 PM  
3 votes:
It's funny , because here is the key...

Acting confident and relaxed . That's the key in everything, getting a job, getting a date etc...

Relax, be confident and just go with it. I found when you didn't care if you got something, you ended up getting it.
Tat'dGreaser
2012-12-03 12:12:12 PM  
3 votes:
1) Go to Fark party

2) Do complete opposite of what every man there is doing
occamswrist
2012-12-03 12:54:32 PM  
2 votes:
Get a haircut
Brush your teeth
Comb your hair
Buy new clothes
Sit up straight
Don't act like the way we treat each either on fark is normal

There I just saved all of you losers the admission fee.
farkingatwork
2012-12-03 12:14:04 PM  
2 votes:

abhorrent1: I'm married. I'm pretty sure my body language always says "Please Kill Me!"


hahaha, I understand this.

Mostly it's more like "please stop acting friendly to me when I'm being polite, because you're making my wife jealous and I know she's going to biatch about it later"

I hate it though, because who wants to turn down talking to people they're attracted to?
EdNortonsTwin
2012-12-03 12:03:18 PM  
2 votes:
The funniest people are the ones who are both desperate and picky.
cgraves67
2012-12-03 11:56:59 AM  
2 votes:
I find that being a little creepy is a good way to filter out the women who aren't desperate.
Pants full of macaroni!!
2012-12-03 11:53:34 AM  
2 votes:
I'm mid-40s, ugly and never-been-married. There is no cure for this kind of creepy.
Ablejack
2012-12-03 06:28:09 PM  
1 vote:
I've found the key to building self confidence is to have sex with many beautiful women.
Repo Man
2012-12-03 03:56:42 PM  
1 vote:

CapeFearCadaver: Repo Man: Women do have a right to specify a minimum height in personal ads. What I find amusing is how horrified they would be if a man were to specify a minimum bra cup size in his ad.

To be fair, height /= boobie size.

If they were going around saying they would only date a man if his penis was at least 6" you might have a point.


Where is the body part conversion chart? Who decides what is equal to what? Elevator shoes and padded bras seem pretty equivalent to me. But, that's just my opinion man.
Repo Man
2012-12-03 02:15:51 PM  
1 vote:

Tat'dGreaser: I'm just glad that I'm forever alone because I'm ugly and boring, at least I'm not creepy


If you look at an attractive woman in a way that even slightly gives away the fact that you think she's pretty, and she thinks that you aren't anywhere close to being in her league (as in, she would find it insulting that you asked her out), you're creepy.
Jon iz teh kewl
2012-12-03 01:01:00 PM  
1 vote:
why would i want a girlfriend when i can just masturbate
Theaetetus
2012-12-03 12:58:25 PM  
1 vote:

pkellmey: MassAsster: Acting confident and relaxed . That's the key in everything, getting a job, getting a date etc...

Relax, be confident and just go with it. I found when you didn't care if you got something, you ended up getting it.

When it comes to other people, it really isn't that simple. I've been told by so many women, "You're the perfect person to date/marry, however you are too short by a few inches. I won't date anyone I can't wear high heels with." Pretty consistent comment that I don't make enough money to overcome (and I am not really interested enough to wear shoe inserts or stupid crap like that).


It's a shame that there are no women shorter than you out there, then. Tough to believe, but I wouldn't dare impugn your credibility or imply that you should maybe stop trying to hit on 6' tall amazons.
Langdon_777 [TotalFark]
2012-12-03 12:56:08 PM  
1 vote:

Kuroshin: MassAsster: It's funny , because here is the key...

Acting confident and relaxed . That's the key in everything, getting a job, getting a date etc...

Relax, be confident and just go with it. I found when you didn't care if you got something, you ended up getting it.

How does one act "confident"? That's always been my issue when people say things like this (not that they're wrong!). Nobody can explain to me what "confident" acts like, or how to arrive there. For someone who has never been truly confident in his entire life, this is as foreign a concept as quantum mechanics is to a layperson.

I'm not even confident when I know for certain that I'm going to win a race. I know the lap times of all the competition, but I'm still unnerved by all the things that can go wrong (including just being shiat behind the wheel that day). Some of us have never known confidence.

/could really use this class


Arrogant, uncaring and definitely not needing said person in your life.

I only fail when I start thinking.
MassAsster
2012-12-03 12:54:59 PM  
1 vote:
@
Kuroshin


Really two ways to "act confident" - trial and error.. You are never going to get comfortable doing something you hardly ever do. Go some place social and just talk to people, not to look for a date, to simply talk to people. If you are going to look for a date, your right back to being socially awkward because you know your there and you start trying hard again.

@
pkellmey

Dude, you are in the wrong crowd, sounds like some real stuck up witches. Try looking in OTHER places, or even trying something like "events and adventures"


meet up with people who enjoy doing similar things rather then going out "date hunting", that is honestly the best way to beat social awkwardness. And it works with job interviews, I interviewed awful, I applied for jobs I didnt want to just do the interview - got much better and nailed it after that every time. People smell when your "trying too hard" - and you also start to give off those socially awkward cues, tapping, looking away , staring at your meal.... that kinda crap.
Langdon_777 [TotalFark]
2012-12-03 12:36:45 PM  
1 vote:

Plant Rights Activist: should I be the first to point out that there was no guide in that link or would that make me seem creepy?


You have to pay for that - this was just an infomercial.
Plant Rights Activist
2012-12-03 12:34:00 PM  
1 vote:
should I be the first to point out that there was no guide in that link or would that make me seem creepy?
Dynascape
2012-12-03 12:24:13 PM  
1 vote:

Tat'dGreaser: I'm just glad that I'm forever alone because I'm ugly and boring, at least I'm not creepy


I didnt realize you were a Main Page-r.
Nurglitch
2012-12-03 12:10:01 PM  
1 vote:
I find eye-contact threatening.

Cool story time: I was at a conference for CFAs and the motivational speaker dude that was hired to speak suggested that men prefer to stand side by side when discussing things, and women preferred to stand opposite. So, as something of a party-game, he proposed that men try to speak to women face to face and women try to speak to men side by side. The result turned the conference hall into something of a dance floor, albeit one with no music except for the strange discussion that one gets in rooms full of CFAs and other financial types.

That was cool, right? Right?!
Langdon_777 [TotalFark]
2012-12-03 11:57:56 AM  
1 vote:
For Guys

Scenario A) You are poor -> she chooses the guy with the BMW and nice suit.

Scenario B) You are rich -> you think her left knee is pointy.

------

Women

Scenario A) You are poor -> want a fark?

Scenario B) You are rich -> like my abs and tan?

(this could be a bit overly simplified)
CapeFearCadaver
2012-12-03 11:49:56 AM  
1 vote:
Rule #1: Don't be a Farker.
The sound of one hand clapping
2012-12-03 11:47:18 AM  
1 vote:
Dammit ladies! Isn't it simply enough that I don't stare at your tits for the whole date? Do I learn how to do all this subtle body language crap too?
Rev. Skarekroe
2012-12-03 11:43:35 AM  
1 vote:
So squeezing my crotch while talking to girls ISN'T what I'm supposed to be doing?
ChipNASA
2012-12-03 11:42:42 AM  
1 vote:
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