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(ABC News)   FDA approves contraceptive skin patch   ( divider line
    More: Spiffy  
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1889 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Nov 2001 at 8:36 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

40 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-11-21 08:40:22 AM  
Worst headline ever. C'mon guys, this is supposed to be funny and weird news, not just parrorting the headline from regular news. Be creative for shiats sake!
2001-11-21 08:45:07 AM  
Gives new meaning to the phrase "Lick and stick"
2001-11-21 08:45:20 AM  
Well, they could have used my link instead. *sigh*
My headline was: Now you can wear your infertility on your arm
2001-11-21 08:45:28 AM  
Good point Fb-

this could have been "Bumper stickers for Whores"
2001-11-21 08:46:30 AM  
Does anyone find the idea of having s3x with someone wearing this patch a little disconcerting? I mean, the trailer trash brood mare down the road with the Nicoderm patches all over her body is starting to look preeeeety good.
2001-11-21 08:47:55 AM  
I sent this story in with the headline "Much sexier than a tattoo!" OK, not hysterical, but better than this one.
2001-11-21 08:50:31 AM  
My suggested headline, when I submitted this LAST NIGHT, was 'Slap this on your wife's fat ass and she won't get knocked up by the milkman.'


Now that's a headline.
2001-11-21 08:52:23 AM  
I like this idea. Now you can go to a club and finally stop waisting time with chicks that have no intention of putting out.
"Hey baby nice patch, you smoke?"
2001-11-21 08:56:30 AM  
Feh. Women who desire a contraception patch need not waste their money. Just slap a picture of a basketball getting pushed through a 2" pipe and they'll be set.
2001-11-21 08:57:22 AM  
I invented a patch like that that was much more effective. I was 6 inches in diameter, and is worn over the vagina.
2001-11-21 09:05:06 AM  
Hmm, wonder if I could grow boobies if I slapped a couple of these babies on?

I hope I didn't just type that out loud? D'oh!
2001-11-21 09:31:46 AM  
Hmmm, half of the headlines on the main page aren't funny...they're just matter-of-fact.

Anyway, no thanks on the patch, I'll stay on my beloved depo-provera. It's more effective...and since I hate children, it's an easy choice. :)
2001-11-21 09:34:31 AM  
Dammit, I wish they'd show us what it looked like.
2001-11-21 09:36:52 AM  
NO THANKS on the patch...I will just stick to my hysterectomy,no yukky periods and no more pregnancies....only trouble is I dont have an excuse for 1 week every month....DAMN....headaches will have to
2001-11-21 09:37:50 AM  
THere is also the life saving 'morning after pill' but i am not sure if that is available in all states yet. In Cali it is w/o perscription too I believe. I support the right to get our collective freak on, just not all at once, or tegther.
2001-11-21 09:41:06 AM  
funny Grivas.
2001-11-21 09:41:11 AM  
"In clinical trials, the product appeared to be less effective in women weighing more than 198 pounds, the agency added."

Yeah, like they're gonna get some anyways...
2001-11-21 09:48:07 AM  
Now come on that is not very farken fair....considering they invented alcohol so big chicks could get laid that was in bad taste :(
2001-11-21 10:09:15 AM  
There isn't enough booze in the world to make me fark those disgusting plumpers.

2001-11-21 10:14:27 AM  
You pepsi out through my nose yet you crack me up....:)
2001-11-21 10:36:38 AM  
Wow, how can people just keep asking for stuff to get more convenient? Did anyone watch that show on the History channel about the sexual revolution in the 60's? Women thanked their lucky stars for a contraceptive as convenient as a pill just once a day. But anyway, how are you supposed to wear it for a week? Wouldn't it come off in the shower or something...
2001-11-21 10:38:59 AM  
Wouldn't it come off in the shower or something...

I wondered this as well. Perhaps that's how the patch works? You don't shower while you're wearing it, and therefore have no worries about conception.

No Showers = No Sex.
2001-11-21 10:41:52 AM  
Got to agree, Fb's best headline ever. I'm still farking laughing.
2001-11-21 10:44:14 AM  
I will pay that seriously though I think it is great to be bringing out easier contraceptives...well for here in Australia anyways....abortion rates are bloody high here as it is all done for free,provided by the good old tax payers...makes me farken sick...its like take a ticket and get in line....teenagers just dont bother with the pill or anything..and why should they when they would have to pay for it...ABORTION IS FREE here at the tax payers expense...come one come all....SICK I SAY...
2001-11-21 11:08:50 AM  
At some point, regardless of her weight, a woman has got to look better to you than your hand, or your dog, or your sheep.
2001-11-21 11:25:43 AM  
I think they should make this patch look like those kids band-aids you see at the store. With cartoon characters and neon colors.
2001-11-21 12:11:25 PM  
Why don't women just cross their legs? It's much cheaper! I don't think anyone ever died from lack of sex! Heh...more like the careless clods die because they had it, ironic, isn't it?

Hubby's getting snipped after this baby's born and we're sure he's okay. Much more convenient, no messing with hormones, no mood swings....
2001-11-21 12:13:03 PM  

No fat chicks. Sorry if that hits too close to home.
2001-11-21 12:25:41 PM  
Not to rain on anyone's parade, but these devices aren't really very good for women. I knew someone who used Norplant, and while it was real convenient for the couple, she ended up having some really bad complications later on.
2001-11-21 12:35:59 PM  
Norplant is the best contraceptive ever invented. No periods and only a shot in the arm every three months. I tried to get my tubes tied but they told me I was "too young". I know I never want kids but trying to convince my Dr. that was futile.
2001-11-21 12:36:33 PM  
Oops, I meant depo-provera. Not norplant. I'm not awake yet..forgive me!
2001-11-21 01:08:45 PM  
It really sucks trying to get your tubes done at an early age...doctors have also become our life planners...pisses me off..although I wanted and had 3 boys I was 23 when I had my last and they refused to do my they told me an IUD was the way to go...haha yeah and the cancer that came with it...farking morons those doctors..If you know you dont want children then those pricks should respect that and do whatever it is you choose to have done...
2001-11-21 01:45:17 PM  
I don't see how this is better. Seems to me, it'd be a lot more convenient to just take a pill once a day.

Imagine the horror, gettin' busy in the hut tub, then having that thing float by...

"Don't worry, it's just my contraceptive."
2001-11-21 03:02:44 PM  
So I guess that the patch is supposed to go on the palm of your hand?

-he who stacks pork
2001-11-21 04:41:51 PM  
Women should wear these patches on their foreheads.
2001-11-21 06:25:45 PM  
The people at the CDC are probably frantically recomputing disease vector calculations for STDs.
2001-11-21 06:50:13 PM  
It's really quite funny how this generation of women, so inundated by environmentalist propaganda, will allow their bodies to flooded with chemicals.
2001-11-21 07:06:04 PM  
Yep, flood my body with chemicals so I can get busy and not have a kid....and as an added bonus not have a period. Gee, I love depo-provera!
2001-11-21 09:02:29 PM  
In clinical trials, the product appeared to be less effective in women weighing more than 198 pounds, the agency added.

Shouldn't weighing more than 198 pounds be a contreceptive in itself?
2001-11-22 03:00:33 AM  
In related news today, hordes of females are confused that they don't smoke anymore, yet become pregnant.
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