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(News4Jax)   Toddler finds used condom on playground...things go down hilll from there   ( news4jax.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Toddler finds, Head Start, Department of Children, Jacksonville Sheriff's Office, daycare, safe  
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10283 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Oct 2012 at 2:43 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-10-29 05:54:00 AM  
2 votes:
Getting used to the taste if condoms is a good start to giving head.
2012-10-29 03:13:02 AM  
2 votes:
i49.tinypic.comView Full Size
2012-10-29 02:55:18 AM  
2 votes:
This facility has been cited for 49 different infractions since last year and is still allowed to operate? WTF?!
2012-10-29 11:28:35 AM  
1 vote:
I remember when Greg B found one on the side of the street and he thought it was a balloon. Must have blown it up 10 times before he got home with it and his dad freaked out. I think we were ~9.
2012-10-29 11:05:18 AM  
1 vote:

...I admit, I've had sex in cars, but I kept the used condom with me (knotting it so the contents don't spill) and then disposed of it properly as soon as possible.

I am a socially responsible slut.
2012-10-29 09:29:15 AM  
1 vote:

Pray 4 Mojo: White people problems.

You obviously didn't read the article, Tiesha.
2012-10-29 08:21:15 AM  
1 vote:
so make condmos illegal
2012-10-29 08:13:54 AM  
1 vote:
The little girl did what many 3-year-olds would do when they find something on the ground: she put it in her mouth.

Don't most kids stop doing that after age 2? Maybe mine did because I didn't send them off to day care to be raised by strangers rather than a parent.
2012-10-29 05:49:54 AM  
1 vote:
"Mom, this gum tastes like shiat!"
2012-10-29 03:44:38 AM  
1 vote:
When I was in fourth grade, I went to a very sketchy birthday party. I didn't really know the kid well, and after being dropped off at the party, it was evident he had no parents home, there was no cake, no party, nothing.

Lacking anything to do, the kid decided to have us walk with him to an abandoned house. I was a very quiet, shy person, terrified of there being no adults around, and I just followed them.

On the way back to his house, there was something on the ground that I thought was a cookie. Now, given that I'm 30, my memory of what it looked like is vague, but even with that vague memory, I don't know why I though it was a cookie. Also given that I had extreme OCD, I have no idea why I picked it up, but I did.

Thinking back on it, it was very shiny and looked like a liver, but it was wrapped in very tight, shiny plastic. I picked it up, and it was like a weird, gelatinous consistency.

I remember the other kids started laughing and pointing at me, and I said, I thought it was a cookie. And they found that hilarious.

What I have always wondered was: did they know what it was?

I still have no idea.

The reason I thought about it is that when I've thought back on it from time to time, the way that it was so shiny and covered in something like a smooth, slippery latex, I've wondered whether it was a condom.

But if it was, what was inside?


Oh, anyhow, in case you're wondering about the rest of the party, eventually the dad came home. He was a real jerk and started yelling at the kid when someone mentioned we had gone to the abandoned house. He yelled something like, "I told you never to go there again!" (as if there was some haunted mythology about that house). It was the first time I had seen abusive yelling. The whole house was a mess. His older sister showed up and went next door to the Dari-Mart (like a 7-11) to get ice cream for the party. It was very, very different from any birthday party I had ever been to before.

It was weird.

But I can't keep thinking about what that "cookie" was that I picked up! Could it have been poop? In some sort of latex baggie? Some sort of menses product?

Again, usch.
2012-10-29 03:38:05 AM  
1 vote:
That mother should be grateful. Her daughter is already being trained for her future career.
2012-10-29 03:06:11 AM  
1 vote:
"We certainly recognize the concern parents would have about an incident like this. We inspect childcare facilities at least three times a year," said John Harrell with the Department of Children and Families."

Well it wasn't there 4 months ago, or at least we didn't see it then.
2012-10-29 03:02:41 AM  
1 vote:

doglover: The lawsuit has no grounds. It's not like the playground people put it there or encourage hobos to fark hookers on the slide. This shiat happens. The only one who's liable is the guy who threw it away.

/Yes, condoms should be the guy's problem. Your 7 petabytes, your problem.

Farking premises liability, how does it work?
i2.kym-cdn.comView Full Size

2012-10-29 03:01:57 AM  
1 vote:

Apos: This facility has been cited for 49 different infractions since last year and is still allowed to operate? WTF?!

Reading comprehension not your strong point eh?

\Five times in 2 years...
2012-10-29 03:00:32 AM  
1 vote:

doglover: The lawsuit has no grounds. It's not like the playground people put it there or encourage hobos to fark hookers on the slide. This shiat happens. The only one who's liable is the guy who threw it away.

The duty owned by landowners to business invitees is to inspect the grounds for hazards, whether man made or artificial, and to make the premises safe when such hazards are discovered. Given that the condom was not found by the landowner prior to allowing business invitees (the children) to discover them, that would appear to be a breach of the duty to inspect the property for hazardous conditions.

The day care will argue that it met its duty by conducting regular inspections, but the defendant will only have their word that they actually conduct regular inspections, and the plaintiff will have a used condom and eyewitnesses that testify as to where it was found (almost said "came" heheh).

So yeah, I wouldn't throw out the lawsuit just yet.

On an unrelated note, if you were farking in that playground and left a condom behind, either you or the person you were farking has gonorrhea. You should probably get checked out.  Oh, and stop throwing your used rubbers on the ground in a farking playground where kids play you douche-bag.
2012-10-29 02:51:32 AM  
1 vote:
Two six year boys are talking, one says to the other,"I found a condom out on the veranda." The other asks,"What's a veranda?"

/my favorite Pat Sajak joke
2012-10-29 02:50:18 AM  
1 vote:
Whoever throws their used condoms on the ground is a real dick.
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