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(Chronicle Herald)   Actual Canadian headline: 'What to do if you hear gunfire.' Find cover surprisingly absent from the list   ( thechronicleherald.ca) divider line
    More: Interesting, Halifax Regional Police, Atlantic Canada, gunshots  
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4224 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Oct 2012 at 8:49 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-10-02 09:29:25 AM  
2 votes:

reveal101: I don't know what you guys are gonna do but if I hear gunfire I'm going to hit the deck.

That's no time to start playing solitaire!
2012-10-02 08:01:06 AM  
2 votes:
We have milk in bags, your argument is invalid.
2012-10-02 01:28:16 PM  
1 vote:

ronaprhys: BTW - IIRC, the police are allowed to lie to you to get a confession. Always remember that - even if it's not true.

It is. Reid interviewing is something I was notoriously terrible at, but I've seen guys in action who could get Rick Astley to give you up.
2012-10-02 10:33:50 AM  
1 vote:
C_Canuk and Flakeloaf
Heated argument that becomes more and more reasonable

You guys are so Canadian. Keep it up.
2012-10-02 10:02:03 AM  
1 vote:
Subtile differences that tell you whether you are in the USA or Canada

USA - Check to see if the kids are OK. Check for holes in person, property.
Canada - Assume it is a car backfiring unless you are in a rural area, in which case it is probably just a poacher.

USA - Check to see if your area is "dry" or "wet", then load up a shopping cart in nearest store
Canada - Decide whether to buy at a government outlet or wait until you get to the US and can load up a cart with duty-free at the nearest store to the border.

USA - Blue
Canada - Red

Canada - Something hunters buy.
USA - something sold in convenience stores by the roadside along with gas, milk, food, tobacco, alcohol, and for some reason, fake antiques.

USA: Found in lattes, sold in cartons or jugs.
Canada: Found in bags under cow, sold in bags for easy freezing when you find a good sale.

USA: English, official, Spanish, de facto, everything else (hospitals, clinics, prisons, urban schools)
Canada: English (8 provinces) French (1 province), English and French (NB), where numbers warrant (schools), except in Quebec (quota on English) or the Rest of Canada (quota on French immersion for some grades and schools), Everything else (on the street).

Attitude towards Sex:
USA: Yes, please!
Canada: The hockey game's about to come on. Maybe later, if my team wins.

Gay marriage:
Canada: Yes
USA: Maybe. Sort of. Off and on. In some places.

Goods and merchandise:
USA: Cheap, plentiful, crappy
Canada: Cheap (plus a premium of up to 100% over the US price), plentiful, crappy, come with a three year warantee (costs extra)

USA: The service economy is a sick joke but service is generally cheerful and excellent due to competition and the natural inclination of Americans to buy and sell anything, anywhere, at any time, even when sleep-walking.
Canada: Service has been heard of, but never seen except on vacation in the US or abroad. The basic attitude is a combination of pre-War British service (slow, reluctant, incompetent, able to ignore you as long as you are able to linger hopefully) and French (speedy, competent, snarky, doesn't have what you want and wouldn't sell it to you if they did, yah bum).

Restaurant Food
USA: portions: gigantic; price: usually moderate; service: good; food: from horrible to suberb
Canada: portions: laughable; price: immoderate; service: unknown; food: from horrible to almost superb depending on whether you are in Quebec and whether you are in a major city or not. Your best bet when travelling: keep driving. You'll get to a place where good food can be purchased eventually, usually in the next province or state.
2012-10-02 09:01:06 AM  
1 vote:
graphics8.nytimes.comView Full Size
2012-10-02 08:59:49 AM  
1 vote:
'What to do if you hear gunfire.'

Call your buddy on the radio and see if he needs help dragging a deer?
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