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(NYPost)   Woman has sex with the pizza delivery boy. But not by choice   ( nypost.com) divider line
    More: Sick, Dr. Jekyll, Roosevelt Hospital, Upper West Side, Amsterdam Avenue  
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31501 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Oct 2012 at 10:12 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-10-01 10:32:11 AM  
22 votes:
When we were kids, my sister and I stayed at home alone during the summer while mom worked. Once a week or so, she'd leave us pizza money. We were dumb kids, so we never even thought of tipping the driver. All through elementary and middle school we ordered from Dominos, which was the only pizza that tasted good to us.

When I was old enough to drive, I got a job at that Dominos delievering pizzas myself. I learned firsthand that the drivers do not even make minimum wage. They have to rely on tips to make any money at all. So I can definately see how a delivery guy might get frustrated if someone wasn't tipping right.

The Dominos where I worked had this old 486 that they ran everything off. One slow afternoon, I was wandering through the file system and came across a password protected folder that was labeled with my home address. After a few tries, I guessed the password - AVOIDNOID69. Inside were hundreds of pictures of former dominos delivery guys, managers, even the owner, doing terrible things to pizzas - spitting on them, blowing their noses on them, wiping themselves with the crusts, even masturbating each other into their cheese. I couldn't help it - I threw up all over the monitor and keyboard.

I've long since switched to DiGiorno, but all secrets be told, I squeeze my dog and make him piss all over it before I bake it. I guess your tastes are all defined by what you grew up with.
2012-10-01 10:20:27 AM  
7 votes:
Little Caesar's: Pizza, Penis
2012-10-01 10:43:17 AM  
6 votes:
i235.photobucket.comView Full Size
2012-10-01 10:15:57 AM  
6 votes:
Knock, knock.
"Who is it?"
"Rape guy."
"Um, no. I don't-"
"Pizza Guy".
"Oh, well that makes more sense then."
2012-10-01 10:49:55 AM  
5 votes:
i446.photobucket.comView Full Size


2012-10-01 10:18:59 AM  
5 votes:
She shouldn't have ordered extra meat...
2012-10-01 10:14:44 AM  
5 votes:
I hope this guy gets raped in 30 minutes or less
2012-10-01 10:18:35 AM  
4 votes:
Why is the word raped in quotation marks? Was it not legitimate?
2012-10-01 10:23:14 AM  
3 votes:
"A baby-faced pizza-delivery boy savagely raped a woman..."

That's nothing; a pizza-faced delivery boy savagely raped a woman here recently.
2012-10-01 11:04:43 AM  
2 votes:

CheekyMonkey: all come in 40lb boxes...

writersgallery.comView Full Size
2012-10-01 10:46:11 AM  
2 votes:

CapeFearCadaver: This one delivery guy creeped me right the fark out a few months ago... the whole sneering eyes and smirk, and of course the tone of his voice as he tried to 'compliment' me... it wasn't a compliment, it was... gah, giving myself the heebie jeebies just thinking about it. I've been stared at and had nasty things said to me by strangers before and while annoying I'd simply ignore, not a big deal.
This guy, it was different, and he was at my front door. I gave him my very best evil eye, scratched out the tip I had written on the charge receipt and told him to fark off. The dog picks up my uneasiness and starts growling so he scampered off.
Then called the restaurant back and told them never to send that driver back to my place. They let me know that my complaint was the fifth they had received in the week he had been working for them.

He'll probably get promoted to manager.
2012-10-01 10:44:18 AM  
2 votes:

strapp3r: FTA: ...raped a woman in her Upper West Side

/i'm confused

He farked her in the right ear.
2012-10-01 10:43:18 AM  
2 votes:
FTA: ...raped a woman in her Upper West Side

/i'm confused
2012-10-01 10:22:00 AM  
2 votes:
She bought the pizza, she knew what she was getting into. I say let her crash.
2012-10-01 09:40:22 AM  
2 votes:

cman: Pizza and sex? Thats a hell of a deal

Sounded to me like it was an offer she couldn't refuse.
2012-10-01 06:24:42 PM  
1 vote:
Since he was 16, and therefore a minor, doesn't this mean that, technically, she raped him???
2012-10-01 12:43:20 PM  
1 vote:

WhippingBoy: lennavan: precious_crotchflake: A baby-faced pizza-delivery boy confessed to savagely raping a woman in her Upper West Side apartment while her young daughter slept next to her in bed - because he was "feeling horny," court papers state."

You realize the only part of this that was quoted from the court papers is the "feeling horny" part, right? That's why they only put quotations around that phrase. Then if you read more than the first farking sentence of the article, you can see the context:

Lucas admitted he snuck into the woman's apartment without permission, "but that he went in because he was feeling horny and that he took advantage of her," prosecutors said.

Court Papers: "He went in because he was feeling horny"
Article/You: "he admitted he raped her!"

Are you intelligent enough to see what just happened there and why a newspaper might stretch the truth to get better headlines and sell copies? Man you're a dipshiat.

She's just following the Second Law of Histrionic Feminism:

"II. Anyone who questions any aspect of a womyn's rape claim, regardless of how implausible that claim may be, must be shamed into silence."

except I'm a dude. But you make me what you need me, the same way you do with facts.
2012-10-01 12:24:59 PM  
1 vote:

Kazrath: No shiat. The woman did not deserve to be raped and robbed but the fact is she also did not use her head. Leaving an apt door unlocked? Who the fark does that?

She was probably either sleeping in the nude, or in a sexy negligee. She obviously deserved it.
2012-10-01 12:04:21 PM  
1 vote:
He had worked at the shop part-time on weekend nights for about a year, said a co-worker, adding, "He's a good kid."

He just occasionally comes back a little late from deliveries.
2012-10-01 11:27:16 AM  
1 vote:
"But I didn't order stuffed crust!"
2012-10-01 11:23:06 AM  
1 vote:

offmymeds: Another Government Employee: Pepperoni or Sausage?

Does it come with a cheesy crust?

You have to lick the cheesy crust off and then it comes.
2012-10-01 11:22:13 AM  
1 vote:

abhorrent1: I never walked around with $20 in my pocket when I was 7. Didn't even own a wallet.

/yes I'm old
//for $20 you can walk on my lawn.

My kids (7 and 8) keep wallets, they carry $20 at a minimum. That's a cab/subway/bus ride home, maybe some food. We check every week at allowance time to make sure it's there - it always has been.

Don't get me wrong - I'd freak the hell out if either of them showed up to the house in a cab. But this teaches them that they can't spend every dime they have in their wallet.
2012-10-01 11:21:58 AM  
1 vote:
All I can say is thank God that NY has gun control. There were no fatalities and the rapist was able to leave unharmed.
2012-10-01 11:19:28 AM  
1 vote:

Another Government Employee: Pepperoni or Sausage?

Does it come with a cheesy crust?
2012-10-01 11:17:20 AM  
1 vote:
looks like he wasn't satisfied...

takes off sunglasses

... with just the tip.
2012-10-01 11:02:18 AM  
1 vote:

Vegan Meat Popsicle: Why is the word raped in quotation marks? Was it not legitimate?

There are now 4 categories of rape:

1. Rape.
2. Rape-rape.
3. Legitimate rape.
4. "Rape".

\coincidentally, all come in 40lb boxes...
2012-10-01 10:41:26 AM  
1 vote:

kcfarker: BAMFinator: kcfarker: No tip necessary, ma'am.

[lolsnaps.com image 479x640]

Delivered pizzas for two years, never had anything like that happen.

When it does happen, it probably won't be anyone we want to see naked.

Delivered pizza for a while, years ago. That happened to me once. Really old guy in tightie-whities. Still traumatized.
2012-10-01 10:32:24 AM  
1 vote:
raperlover's pizza?
2012-10-01 10:31:42 AM  
1 vote:
But the victim wasn't buying it. "These a--holes are going to say he's a good kid? I want that pizzeria to pay," she fumed.

Cash or check?
2012-10-01 10:29:46 AM  
1 vote:

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2012-10-01 10:25:17 AM  
1 vote:
"He violated us, it's disgusting - roaming around apartments looking to hurt people while you're working."

Not sure why this is qualified with "while you're working."
2012-10-01 10:25:01 AM  
1 vote:
'raped'?? Did Akin write this article?
2012-10-01 10:23:00 AM  
1 vote:
theinfosphere.orgView Full Size
2012-10-01 10:21:15 AM  
1 vote:
I am here to fix ze cable, ich bin expert.
2012-10-01 10:20:40 AM  
1 vote:
Well she asked for pizza with everything.
2012-10-01 10:20:16 AM  
1 vote:

BigSnatch: She shouldn't have ordered extra meat sausage...

2012-10-01 10:17:55 AM  
1 vote:
You know what happens next, Mr. Lebowski....
2012-10-01 10:16:55 AM  
1 vote:
So what is worse ... 'rape' or rape?
2012-10-01 10:16:28 AM  
1 vote:
I guess they both wanted a slice.
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