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(Gawker)   Best. School absence note. Ever   (gawker.com) divider line
    More: Spiffy, pardons, Honeywell, exclamation points  
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36953 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Jun 2012 at 7:06 PM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



136 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2012-06-02 5:02:22 PM  
Berry Carnack MaoBongo is just trying to keep the poor kid out of school so he will have to rely on the govt for his purple drank and fried chicken.
 
2012-06-02 5:16:36 PM  
Sincerely,
Juan Epstein's Mother
 
2012-06-02 5:34:29 PM  
Does Mr. Ackerman get to keep the note?
 
2012-06-02 5:38:08 PM  
That's pretty sweet.
 
2012-06-02 5:50:16 PM  
c498390.r90.cf2.rackcdn.comView Full Size

I bet the poor kid who only got an excuse note from Chris Christie feels robbed...

/it's not even on official Governor of New Jersey stationery!
//which I hope isn't scented...
 
2012-06-02 6:03:07 PM  

Paris1127: //which I hope isn't scented...


The odor of cheez-wiz is distinctive.
 
2012-06-02 6:51:57 PM  
I want to see the long-form excuse.
 
2012-06-02 7:10:34 PM  

Shostie: I want to see the long-form excuse.


Close it up and turn off the lights. Thread over.
 
2012-06-02 7:11:48 PM  
blog.ctnews.comView Full Size


/impressed

//obscure?
 
2012-06-02 7:12:13 PM  

Friskya: Sincerely,
Juan Epstein's Mother


Dang, beat me to it.
 
2012-06-02 7:13:02 PM  
That absence notice is NOT from the USA.
 
2012-06-02 7:13:21 PM  
OH MY GOD! The savior performed another miracle! Stop what you're doing and remember where you were when.

Still, that's about the most meaningful signature he's penned since taking office.
 
2012-06-02 7:13:22 PM  
That's an excuse I can believe in
 
2012-06-02 7:15:18 PM  
The President has a cool looking signature.
 
2012-06-02 7:15:38 PM  
Zero tolerance. Suspend the kid for being absent.
 
2012-06-02 7:16:31 PM  

Friskya: Sincerely,
Juan Epstein's Mother


img.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
2012-06-02 7:16:34 PM  

Shostie: I want to see the long-form excuse.


Heh heh... nicely done
 
2012-06-02 7:16:47 PM  

Russ1642: Zero tolerance. Suspend the kid for being absent.


Then report him to the CIA for his contact with a high-level Kenyan intelligence operative.
 
2012-06-02 7:16:56 PM  
 
2012-06-02 7:17:01 PM  

DrippinBalls: That absence notice is NOT from the USA.


I'm gonna have to see the long-form explanation of absence to be sure.

//Obama's still a pretty cool dude, apparently.
 
2012-06-02 7:17:16 PM  
Wow, the Kenyan-in Chief wrote the kid a note! That's about as worthless as Bounel's birth certificate.

I can't believe you farkers fell for this conman's lies. What makes you so gullible - wishful thinking?
 
2012-06-02 7:18:28 PM  
It's just part of Obama's Every Child Left Behind agenda!
 
2012-06-02 7:20:42 PM  
Follow up story will be principal expelling Tyler and selling the president's signiture on Ebay.
 
2012-06-02 7:21:09 PM  
FOX NEWS SPECIAL REPORT - BREAKING: Alleged president B. Hussein Obongo kidnaps child and threatens schoolteacher. Police say socialism may be involved.
 
2012-06-02 7:22:01 PM  

imprimere: It's just part of Obama's Every Child Left Behind agenda!


You are just hoping Obama leaves some of those children's behinds for you.
 
2012-06-02 7:24:04 PM  
I remember in high school I knew a guy who made sure the very first note he ever turned in was in his own handwriting, that way they'd always refer back to it to "verify" subsequent ones.

It didn't take long for him to realize they weren't even reading the text of the notes, so he just kept pushing it farther and farther... The last one he gave them said to excuse him as he'd been fishing with Albert Einstein and the Pope and nobody said a word.

I think he stopped because something inside him died that day.
 
2012-06-02 7:29:06 PM  

PsiChi: Wow, the Kenyan-in Chief wrote the kid a note! That's about as worthless as Bounel's birth certificate.

I can't believe you farkers fell for this conman's lies. What makes you so gullible - wishful thinking?


No style, overly angry, 3rd grade level taunting, appeal to ridicule. Step up your game, son. Read up on Mike_Lowell's work; it may give some inspiration.

I live with my mom
 
2012-06-02 7:30:32 PM  

imprimere: Still, that's about the most meaningful signature he's penned since taking office.


Yo Drew...there's plenty of room up there next to the "Smart" tag for a "Retard" tag.
 
2012-06-02 7:30:33 PM  
The related link on the bottom of the page reminds me of many a fine conversation we've had here about teachers and students:

http://gawker.com/5914700/high-school-student-who-seduced-teacher-did - it-to-win-bet
 
2012-06-02 7:32:31 PM  

StoneColdAtheist: imprimere: Still, that's about the most meaningful signature he's penned since taking office.

Yo Drew...there's plenty of room up there next to the "Smart" tag for a "Retard" tag.


Drew doesn't want us to wear out our clicking finger.
 
2012-06-02 7:33:23 PM  
That's alright, for a Demoncrat. Mitt Romney would have bought the school and fired the principal and all the teachers though, like any real American would of.
 
2012-06-02 7:34:46 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: The President has a cool looking signature.


americanthinker.comView Full Size


3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size



I always wonder if celebrity autographs are organic, or if they have consultants to develop one.

For instance, I got LeAnn Rimes' autograph when she was about 18, and I doubt she came up with it herself.

i152.photobucket.comView Full Size


This isn't the best example, but notice how the L, the R and the A are all made with the same pen stroke, and the A is also a star.
 
2012-06-02 7:35:12 PM  

GungFu: I thought it was going to be this rather dyslexic effort:

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x363]

'Dery [dear] Mrs. Trotty [Trottier]. Gannon is not going to the prgrogm [program].'

6 year old kid's effort not to go to the 'program', whatever that is. It worked.


If Gannon isn't going to be in the program, what will Link do?
 
2012-06-02 7:35:53 PM  
great, Zer0 is behind yet another bail out...
 
2012-06-02 7:35:54 PM  
Obama supports skipping school.

Romney 2012
 
2012-06-02 7:36:22 PM  
Fellas, fellas! Relax.. both of your mothers were whores.
 
2012-06-02 7:38:50 PM  
I'm a democrat, but if I somehow received a republican presidential excuse note, I would frame it. Geez....lighten up folks. It's a cute story.
 
2012-06-02 7:41:11 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2012-06-02 7:41:31 PM  
img.gawkerassets.comView Full Size


Hey, bring me some more weed up here please ... STAT

 
2012-06-02 7:41:38 PM  
Epstein's mother is alive and well. (Dear Mr. Kotter....)
 
2012-06-02 7:41:56 PM  
Cool.
 
2012-06-02 7:45:48 PM  

imprimere: , but if you read Gawker's take - "Perfectly crafted periods." - it


You know how I know you aren't familiar with Gawker?

That's called sarcasm, bro. 99% of articles on Gawker are written sarcastically/tongue in cheek.

But please do carry on with your trolling. It's quite well-crafted, almost believable.
 
2012-06-02 7:46:01 PM  

Peepeye: I'm a democrat, but if I somehow received a republican presidential excuse note, I would frame it. Geez....lighten up folks. It's a cute story.


No kidding. Sounds like lately Obama couldn't save a family from a building single-handedly without being criticized for something something socialism.
 
2012-06-02 7:47:51 PM  

imprimere: My milkshake brings all the derp to the yard


*favorited!*
 
2012-06-02 7:48:27 PM  
 
2012-06-02 7:52:07 PM  

MayContainHorseGluten: Peepeye: I'm a democrat, but if I somehow received a republican presidential excuse note, I would frame it. Geez....lighten up folks. It's a cute story.

No kidding. Sounds like lately Obama couldn't save a family from a building single-handedly without being criticized for something something socialism.


"Why didn't 0bama let the firefighters save that family? Does he think he's better than our red-blooded REAL AMERICAN HEROES? Because of his typical liberal socialist selfishness, those men didn't work, and we all know 0bambi wants to keep Americans out of work and sucking off the government tit. That's why we need a real friend to the middle class, someone who understands how important it is for Americans to work....someone like Mitt Romney."

Jesus, I think I need to take a shower after typing that.
 
2012-06-02 7:53:58 PM  
Amper:

See, it's probably cuz I've been cleaning and shampooing my carpet all day (yep, there's your softball), and finally get to relax with a beer, but that shiat's funny right there
 
2012-06-02 7:56:58 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2012-06-02 7:59:15 PM  

noiseboy: [blog.ctnews.com image 350x422]

/impressed

//obscure?


och
aye
 
2012-06-02 7:59:41 PM  
"Coont-canker" is now my new favorite insult I've learned from Fark. Twatwaffle, tardvaark, chucklefark, and sparklefark now have a new friend.
 
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