Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Fark)   Make up a historical fact and share it with us   ( divider line
    More: Unlikely  
•       •       •

3592 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 May 2012 at 4:02 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

521 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | » | Newest | Show all

2012-05-07 01:14:57 AM  
In 1871, Michael Louis Beauregard hit the first home run in history during a game in Toledo, Ohio. This is where "MLB" comes from. "Major League Baseball" was added later.
2012-05-07 01:18:42 AM  
The Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria were named after Columbus' mistresses. Nina was the transgendered one.
2012-05-07 01:20:03 AM  
Eva Braun's parents felt she could do much better than Hitler.
2012-05-07 01:31:39 AM  
In 1923, it was illegal to laugh in public in China.
2012-05-07 01:41:29 AM  
The ancient Greeks had technologically sophisticated clockwork prosthetic limbs. Although a few, severely deteriorated specimens remain, no fully function limb is currently in existence and the technology of these advanced clockworks was lost during the Dark Ages.
2012-05-07 01:44:11 AM  
In the 18th century, cats were a delicacy in Nova Scotia.
2012-05-07 02:01:21 AM  

Hankie Fest: In 1923, it was illegal to laugh in public in China.

it still is
2012-05-07 02:28:37 AM  
"The Star Spangled Banner" was originally composed in Yiddish.
2012-05-07 02:28:45 AM  
Whalers on the Moon?
2012-05-07 04:05:14 AM  
When I pee, I actually pee yesterday, but still have to flush today, because that stuff has been mellowing for a while.
2012-05-07 04:05:55 AM  
Pablo Picasso was going to be a fascist dictator, but changed his mind when he got into art school.
2012-05-07 04:09:41 AM  
An historical fact.

2012-05-07 04:09:57 AM  
The United States of America was known for the excellence of it's mass produced beer.
2012-05-07 04:12:21 AM  
Tea was discovered by Moses while on a fishing expedition, who first smoked the substance, then decided he could brew it like he normally prepared his mushrooms. He also dyed his hair neon blue, wore Reeboks, and was the first rheumatic basketball player to be able to complete the layup. He liked bronze cut angel hair cappellini alla alfredo e portabello, and his favorite kind of kool aid was any kind, spiked with vodka. And he was the first most interesting man in the world, but did not drink Dos Equis, as he preferred Tullamore Dew, the original Mountain Dew. Oh, and he was an Irish Immigrant to Russia. Also, he made a spaceship, not an ark.

Where's my prize?
2012-05-07 04:14:10 AM  
Velveeta is actually the original cheese. All cheeses since then are a poor imitation.
2012-05-07 04:18:28 AM  
2pac is alive and hiding as a wax statue in Vegas. When the wax museum closes, he spends the night recording new albums.
2012-05-07 04:18:50 AM  
Washington placed Wayne in command of a newly-formed military force called the "Legion of the United States". Wayne established a basic training facility at Legionville to prepare professional soldiers for his force. Wayne's was the first attempt to provide basic training for regular U.S. Army recruits and Legionville was the first facility established expressly for this purpose.
He then dispatched a force to Ohio to establish Fort Recovery as a base of operations. On August 3, a tree fell on Wayne's tent. He survived, but was rendered unconscious. By the next day, he had recovered sufficiently to resume the march.[3] he had gout
2012-05-07 04:21:01 AM  
The Statue of Liberty was actually regifted. It was given to France by the Germans. When France gave it to the U.S., the Germans were outraged.

This is how World War II started.
2012-05-07 04:22:30 AM  
12 world cities have now been built around the Segway with three more almost complete.
2012-05-07 04:24:12 AM  

nmrsnr: Nikola Tesla invented the AC motor specifically so he could build a spinning bow tie.

It was Westinghouse, and it was his kid's beanie hat. Stop reading Wreckapedia.
2012-05-07 04:26:01 AM  
Barack Obama was born in the United States...
2012-05-07 04:27:02 AM  
Oscar Wilde was a conduit of the modern World Wide Web.
2012-05-07 04:27:18 AM  

Uglybarnacle: Barack Obama was born in the United States...

That joke never gets old...
2012-05-07 04:27:32 AM  
Alaska was actually won by the US in a high-stakes game of Go Fish.
2012-05-07 04:29:30 AM  

But Wait There's More: At the Last Supper, 5 Apostles ordered dessert.

Yeah, but only after they heard that the check was going to be divided equally.
2012-05-07 04:29:52 AM  
I am Legend.
2012-05-07 04:31:05 AM  
I am Spartacus.
2012-05-07 04:32:07 AM  
"The Grassy Knoll" from whence JFK's second shooter supposedly took aim is a typographical error which entered popular culture thanks to a carelessly-taken dictation and a heavily-inebriated Earl Warren. The original Warren Commission report should have read that the mystery shooter was believed to have been standing on one deGrasse, Neil, now a famed astrophysicist, then a five-year-old.
2012-05-07 04:32:16 AM  
Former president Bill Clinton was barley able to keep his heavy involvement in human trafficking a secret from the media.
2012-05-07 04:32:25 AM  
George Bush 2.0 was not only the smartest president ever, but the smartest human ever, with an IQ over 9000.
2012-05-07 04:33:48 AM  
Monica Lewinsky swallowed. The stain got on her dress when she brushed up against Hillary while passing in the hall one day.
2012-05-07 04:36:29 AM  
Sir Francis Bacon has been called the creator of empiricism. His works established and popularised inductive methodologies for scientific inquiry, often called the Baconian method, or simply the scientific method. But his greatest contribution to Western culture is the widely recognised phrase, "What are you staring at, Homo?
2012-05-07 04:36:38 AM  
In 1805 Sacagawea had a child while traveling with Lewis and Clark to the Pacific Northwest. Recent DNA testing has confirmed that the father is in fact William Clark. It is noted that he did provide child support giving further evidence to this truth.
2012-05-07 04:36:43 AM  
The year was 1979, and a young George Lucas is taken by a group of spunky freedom fighters from space, to a land far far away. Left in his stead, a mentally challenged Clone, who because of a faulty electrical panel, is ejected from the Cloning chamber 3 cycles to soon.
Clone Lucas is in all ways like George Lucas 1.0, in every way; except one. Because of Lucas 2.0's abbreviated time cooking, his mind is forever that of a criminally insane, 9 year old human child, with the IQ of a turnip.
Look it up..It's completely not true..
2012-05-07 04:43:16 AM  
Drew spent millions of dollars on survey research before going with {smart} and {funny} to replace voting.
2012-05-07 04:43:27 AM  
The oldest known writing is from the iron-rich Meso-Aryan rill villey region now popularly known to Westerners as Burnt Umbra (after which the Crayola colour is named, the same as Safflower is named after the late Utah crooner Daniel "White Pants" Safflower, Jr.). Starting at least nine thousand years ago, merchant princes recorded wares, stocks, and trades by pressing small dried bird's feet into partially solidified clay tablets. Marco Polo brought this method back to Italy, where it became known as 'scritti politti'. By that point, the Ancient Greeks had developed the process of standing around and speaking dramatically, and visiting Italians taught them how to write their speeches down so that they could repeat them and share them when they weren't speaking (for example, when they were sleeping, or out of town). Our word 'politics' arises from this fascinating history, though the original bird's feet are now long forgotten.
2012-05-07 04:43:30 AM  
Juicyfruit is the flavor of Rick Santorum's smegma
2012-05-07 04:47:49 AM  
In ancient Greece and in the early days of the Roman Empire, it was customary to allow a potential buyer one night alone with any farm animal they intended to purchase to ensure the quality of the animal. As the Roman empire grew this practice became known as "escrow" and continues to be used to this very day for the same purpose it was originally intended.
2012-05-07 04:53:18 AM  
In the original DARPA implementation of DARPANet (the very, very early internet), phone numbers were used instead of IP addresses to identify one machine to another, since they all had to connect via phone lines through acoustic couplers at just over 50 Baud. The first machine on that network to send an e-mail had the address of 8675309, but oddly enough had the nickname "Penny", due to its dependence upon copper wiring.
2012-05-07 04:59:04 AM  
Historians disagree on whether dbirchall lost his virginity to a Mormon girl in the honors-program lounge at Utah State University, or to a Wesleyan University co-ed who could hold the thick end of a juggling club between her feet while naked and do exactly what you're imagining.
2012-05-07 05:02:52 AM  
Tea Party members are the most educated voters of all time.
2012-05-07 05:03:30 AM  
The Tea Party was formed by grass root Patriots concerned for America
2012-05-07 05:04:45 AM  
Idaho - Secession and Stalemate

For a brief time in 1893, Idaho seceded from the union after the states congressmen became so disgusted with a two-month long filibuster that they stormed out of congress and vowed to split from the union and join with Canada.
A delegation from Idaho (led by one of the former senators) was immediately dispatched to meet with provincial authorities in British Columbia to discuss their options, but the British Columbian premier, who insisted they address him as "Burt", refused to believe Idaho was actually a state, and eventually deemed the entire delegation crackpots and had them arrested and ejected by the Northwest Mounted Police.
Upon realizing secession would be without the support of Canada and increasingly afraid of an impending federal intervention, Governor McConnell ordered the capital to be fortified and began to raise a militia. Thus began what was referred to as "The Great Idaho Stalemate," which lasted for four months, from July 1893 until the end of October of the same year, when Gov. McConnell realized no attack was coming. With militiamen refusing to carry on the occupation of the capital and no response whatsoever from Washington DC, Governor McConnell ordered the fortifications around the capital torn down and met with his cabinet, ultimately deciding to rejoin the union on November 6, 1893.
The original senators who had stormed out of congress nearly six months prior returned to Washington DC on November 19, 1893. When they expressed their intention to rejoin the union, however, they were met with utter confusion by the majority of congress. None of the other senators, as it turned out, had realized the delegates from Idaho had stormed out. Congress had been unaware that Idaho had seceded, and what was worse for the state's senators, nobody had taken note of their absence. The senators mumbled their dismay and quietly took their seats, and the filibuster entered its tenth month.
Not another word was spoken of the secession of Idaho, most likely due to the fact that the rest of congress thought it a poorly timed joke, and the senators from Idaho were too embarrassed to correct them.
2012-05-07 05:05:35 AM  
Among porn-aficionados, the most-sought item is a film-reel with Hitler's home-made porn.
2012-05-07 05:05:48 AM  
During the early colonial days of the United States many residents of the region now known as 'North Carolina' were so genetically inbred that during the Revolutionary war many were asked to paint their feet with black tar and walk through a minefield, convinced that they would be protected from any buried explosives they would find.

Hence, the term Tarheel is used to describe any natives from that region.
2012-05-07 05:11:30 AM  
George Washington was a child killing cannibal HBO even mad a movie about it.
2012-05-07 05:13:13 AM  
Alexander Hamilton was murdered after a one-nighter with some bridge-and-tunnel whore.
2012-05-07 05:13:47 AM  
Terrorists hijacked four planes in 2001. Two were crashed into the World Trade Center Towers. One crashed into the Pentagon. One had engine troubles and crashed in a field.
2012-05-07 05:14:08 AM  
This tale revolves around the complete upheaval--reversal--of Benito Mussolini's existence, and I'd enjoy spending a short while, if you'll stay attentive, explaining the method by which he became the Dictator of Italy.

He was reared in Predappio and spent the lion's share of his youth on playing fields, completely idle. One day, while engaging in some athletics adjacent to a local institute of learning, two men of questionable intent began sowing tumult in the area where Mussolini resided. After a single bout of fisticuffs, Benito's mother became frightened and insisted that he relocate to the household of her sister and her husband.

He hailed a carriage, but as it approached he noticed 1) the identifying lettering closely matched a nickname he was known by and 2) a curious adornment hanging from the perch. He proclaimed these observations unusual, but disregarded them and bade the driver onward.

He arrived at the dwelling in the mid-evening and, promising to greet his coachman in the future despite his pungent aroma, surveyed his dominion. He had arrived at last, to claim his seat of power as the Dictator of Italy.
2012-05-07 05:18:07 AM  
America was founded as a Christian nation
Displayed 50 of 521 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | » | Newest | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.