If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CNN)   Chavez: I'm not saying Americans infected me with a cancer ray, but they infected me with a cancer ray   ( cnn.com) divider line
    More: Asinine  
•       •       •

11087 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2011 at 12:34 AM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2011-12-28 08:59:04 PM  
14 votes:
Look Hugo, I'm sure the cancer isn't any happier about it than you are.
2011-12-28 11:02:18 PM  
7 votes:
He's onto us, boys. Fire up the earthquake machine!
2011-12-28 09:16:35 PM  
7 votes:
images.wikia.comView Full Size

Cancer Ray?
2011-12-29 12:38:58 AM  
6 votes:
assets.sbnation.comView Full Size

2011-12-29 01:49:05 AM  
5 votes:
i30.photobucket.comView Full Size
2011-12-28 09:40:52 PM  
5 votes:
From TFA:

"I don't know. I'm just putting the thought out there," Chavez said.

Apparently his rhetorical influences are Che Guavara, Fidel Castro...and Glenn Beck.
2011-12-29 01:50:35 AM  
4 votes:


i177.photobucket.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 11:22:00 AM  
3 votes:
what an American death ray actually does look like

thedailygouge.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 12:56:41 AM  
3 votes:
Fruitier than a nut salad.

I love this article by Christopher Hitchens which questions Chavez's mental state

An excerpt
He essentially doubted the existence of al-Qaida, let alone reports of its attacks on the enemy to the north. "I don't know anything about Osama Bin Laden that doesn't come to me through the filter of the West and its propaganda." To this, Penn replied that surely Bin Laden had provided quite a number of his very own broadcasts and videos. I was again impressed by the way that Chávez rejected this proffered lucid-interval lifeline. All of this so-called evidence, too, was a mere product of imperialist television. After all, "there is film of the Americans landing on the moon," he scoffed. "Does that mean the moon shot really happened? In the film, the Yanqui flag is flying straight out. So, is there wind on the moon?" As Chávez beamed with triumph at this logic, an awkwardness descended on my comrades, and on the conversation.
Chávez, in other words, is very close to the climactic moment when he will announce that he is a poached egg and that he requires a very large piece of buttered toast so that he can lie down and take a soothing nap.
2011-12-29 12:49:11 AM  
3 votes:
i2.cdn.turner.comView Full Size

And I don't want to make any baseless accusations about the Burger King stealing my neck, but the Burger King stole my neck.
/Whoppers are yummy
2011-12-29 09:56:03 AM  
2 votes:
The actual machine the CIA used on Chavez:

i184.photobucket.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 09:00:30 AM  
2 votes:
southparkstudios-intl.mtvnimages.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 01:45:04 AM  
2 votes:
lookingattheleft.comView Full Size

I'm just asking questions.
2011-12-29 12:55:50 AM  
2 votes:
regretsy.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 12:54:08 AM  
2 votes:
I heard that Rick Perry told the Venezualen people to pray for Hugo to get cancer. -Herman Cain
2011-12-29 12:52:25 AM  
2 votes:
patdollard.s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size
strangekidsclub.comView Full Size

Hugo, meet Hugo. Hugo, Hugo.

/ Window seat, please.
2011-12-28 11:15:50 PM  
2 votes:
I see he's been watching Fox News.
2011-12-28 10:30:50 PM  
2 votes:
Shoulda never had that second slice of torta de polonia...
2011-12-28 09:27:55 PM  
2 votes:
Still no cure for Chavez.
2011-12-29 01:06:26 PM  
1 vote:
The Sun is there?
2011-12-29 11:31:51 AM  
1 vote:
"Where's that cancer?"
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

Found it!
cdn0.wn.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 11:28:29 AM  
1 vote:
Anyone seen Bruce McCulloch lately?

/he is sorry. He just got on a roll.
2011-12-29 10:17:12 AM  
1 vote:

Mr_Fabulous: Think I'm wrong? Name another current South American political leader.

Waxlover Buttmaster, the king of Brazil.

Folgers McCocaine, the president of Colombia.

Who is the moran now?!
2011-12-29 09:30:39 AM  
1 vote:
img137.imageshack.usView Full Size
2011-12-29 08:59:10 AM  
1 vote:
Hillary Clinton did this. She is literally the bride of Satan, and can dispense cancer.

Think about it, Sheeple. Guliani got in her way to get elected to the Senate. BOOM! Cancer. Out of the race. Ted Kennedy backs Obama over her in the 2008 DNC primaires. BOOM! Brain cancer.

I don't know what Chavez did to make her list, but it couldn't happen to a nicer guy.
2011-12-29 08:03:48 AM  
1 vote:
Hugo Chavez: He helps Americans finally understand how Dubya looked to the rest of the world.
2011-12-29 03:11:20 AM  
1 vote:
pollsb.comView Full Size

We got guys in the CIA don't we Tom? Guys that might like a story about a dirty politician getting what he had coming. They might like that, right Tom?

Damn, mixed up my Al Pacino character parts

Manny, shoot that piece of shiat.

2011-12-29 02:52:58 AM  
1 vote:
Before we use the cancer ray on him, we should use the "constantly growing, long pointy nose" ray, the "shrivel your genitalia to the size of a toothpick" ray and the "permanent explosive diarrhea" ray.

If it were up to me.
2011-12-29 02:41:11 AM  
1 vote:
theepochtimes.comView Full Size

just sayin...

2011-12-29 02:33:22 AM  
1 vote:
Poor Chavez got hit by radiation and developed cancer.

This guy got hit by radiation and became a half-selachian

thatchickensite.comView Full Size

2011-12-29 01:41:46 AM  
1 vote:

A Terrible Human: here to help: It is quite possible.

Can I buy pot from you?

babble.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 01:27:03 AM  
1 vote:

SaintOfKillers: [i2.cdn.turner.com image 640x360]
And I don't want to make any baseless accusations about the Burger King stealing my neck, but the Burger King stole my neck.
/Whoppers are yummy

He looks like John Goodman playing Linda Tripp.

truthdig.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 01:07:31 AM  
1 vote:

here to help: I thought the internet had decided on Immadinnerjacket?

I always miss out on the internet meetings. I'm usually on my ipad and the meetings are always in flash.
2011-12-29 01:01:03 AM  
1 vote:

here to help: So remind me again why America hates this guy so much? What threat is he? What has he done to draw your ire? Is it just simply SOLISHILIZMZ and HE SAYS MEAN THINGS ABOUT US!!!

Because if so... STFU and ignore him... you know... like adults?

Ummm, we talk about him because its funny and we ran out of other stuff to look at on the internet. Plus we can spell Chavez unlike Akbarbamijanahd Ahmadijihad Abbadabbadoo that Iranian guy that looks like Yakov Smirnoff.
2011-12-29 12:47:44 AM  
1 vote:
So what, he went through an American airport?
2011-12-29 12:44:17 AM  
1 vote:
We're not saying you like to get buttfarked in the ass, Chavez. It's just.....well, you liked to get buttfarked in the ass. In. The. ASS!!!
2011-12-29 12:43:19 AM  
1 vote:
I'm not saying cliche is getting old fast
2011-12-29 12:40:06 AM  
1 vote:
It's not exactly difficult to induce cancer in someone...

i.imgur.comView Full Size
2011-12-29 12:38:51 AM  
1 vote:
Cancer Sucks...Sometimes
2011-12-29 12:36:06 AM  
1 vote:
Hugo, if we had that kind of tech, we wouldn't have JUST given you CANCER, you know?
2011-12-28 10:26:02 PM  
1 vote:
Meh, you'll get over......oh, wait....
2011-12-28 09:56:42 PM  
1 vote:

jake_lex: From TFA:

"I don't know. I'm just putting the thought out there," Chavez said.

Apparently his rhetorical influences are Che Guavara, Fidel Castro...and Glenn Beck.

I hear Chavez raped and killed a girl in 1990
Displayed 42 of 42 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.