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(Fark)   LP 400 - Last Post wins a modest prize. . No purchase necessary. Void everywhere. LGT LP399   ( divider line
    More: Fail, Last Post  
•       •       •

14836 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Dec 2011 at 1:59 PM (6 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

12601 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | » | Newest

2011-12-14 02:28:05 PM  
i369.photobucket.comView Full Size
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2011-12-14 02:28:10 PM  

moops: I'm going to complicate things by making the post count go down.

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And THAT is what you risk a vacation for ?
2011-12-14 02:28:15 PM  

2011-12-14 02:28:16 PM  

A Leaf in Fall: So, is the point of this to post something so bad that the entire thread gets locked?

Lemon Party time?
2011-12-14 02:28:21 PM  
spikednation.comView Full Size
2011-12-14 02:28:23 PM  
writersgallery.comView Full Size

2011-12-14 02:28:37 PM  
Rush Limbaugh is mad because he farked all those young boys up the ass and left none for him.
2011-12-14 02:28:37 PM  
I really smell bad today
2011-12-14 02:28:37 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:28:42 PM  
I don't know what this is, but I LIKE IT!
2011-12-14 02:28:43 PM  

moops: I'm going to complicate things by making the post count go down.

[ image 350x240]

See ya tomorrow.
2011-12-14 02:28:49 PM  
I wanna win
2011-12-14 02:28:49 PM  
Do it AGAIN!!!
2011-12-14 02:28:54 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:28:57 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:28:57 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:28:59 PM  
Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it's written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation's OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.
Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.
Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.
Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.
Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.
Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.
Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.
Pronunciation (think of Psyche!)
Is a paling stout and spikey?
Won't it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.
Finally, which rhymes with enough,
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!!!
2011-12-14 02:29:02 PM  
If there is one thing this thread needs, it's more nutmeg.
2011-12-14 02:29:12 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:29:12 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:29:13 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:29:16 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:29:25 PM  
Here's your winner!!
2011-12-14 02:29:38 PM  
And I should mention that it is all Obama`s fault. The %1 should be required to feed, bathe the rest of us.
2011-12-14 02:29:45 PM  
Let's just do this thing already.
2011-12-14 02:29:46 PM  
2011-12-14 02:29:47 PM  
i776.photobucket.comView Full Size
2011-12-14 02:29:54 PM  
I want it I want it I want it!!!!
2011-12-14 02:29:54 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:29:55 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:30:01 PM  
2011-12-14 02:30:05 PM  
funnyreign.comView Full Size
2011-12-14 02:30:07 PM  
Timing is everything. Too bad my timing is bad
2011-12-14 02:30:08 PM  
A million to one shot Doc!
2011-12-14 02:30:09 PM  
I don't care.
2011-12-14 02:30:10 PM  
The key kto winning these LP threads is timing. Take it from me my timing is awful and I've never won even one of these
2011-12-14 02:30:12 PM Full Size
2011-12-14 02:30:13 PM  
Aaarrgghhh be matey! I will win! LOL.
2011-12-14 02:30:14 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:30:18 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:30:19 PM  
...or not.
2011-12-14 02:30:21 PM  
I win!
2011-12-14 02:30:22 PM  
an attempt
2011-12-14 02:30:22 PM  
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2011-12-14 02:30:23 PM  

basemetal: moops: I'm going to complicate things by making the post count go down.

[ image 350x240]

See ya tomorrow.

2011-12-14 02:30:25 PM  
It's mine
2011-12-14 02:30:25 PM  
2011-12-14 02:30:26 PM  
2011-12-14 02:30:27 PM  
i939.photobucket.comView Full Size
2011-12-14 02:30:31 PM  
I`m okay with losing, just as long as I don`t shart myself again.
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