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(Yahoo)   Taliban find a couple of helicopter tires, claim total victory in war   ( divider line
    More: Stupid  
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7380 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Nov 2001 at 12:54 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

86 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-11-06 12:55:25 PM  
2001-11-06 12:57:08 PM  
i read somewheres that the type of landing gear that the taliban claims comes from a shot down 'copter isn't available on any of the 'copters we're using over there currently...
2001-11-06 12:57:24 PM  
Farkers find vague reference to France, claims France surrenders!
2001-11-06 12:59:18 PM  
Welp, I give up.
2001-11-06 12:59:59 PM  
2001-11-06 01:00:11 PM  
...and in related news the Taliban's Research and Development department claims that they are closer than ever to developing the flintlock.
2001-11-06 01:01:07 PM  
Is it just me, or are US choppers very crashprone? Seems the slightest bad weather or tech. malfunction over enemy territory would cause them to "crash"...
2001-11-06 01:01:49 PM  
USA: "You are indeed brave sir knight, but the fight is mine"
Taliban: "I'm invincible!
USA: "You're a loony"
2001-11-06 01:02:24 PM  
I think all helicopters are crash prone... it's that whole downside to not having wings.
2001-11-06 01:03:54 PM  
Old news. Smokey McPott 1 - nil.
2001-11-06 01:04:26 PM  
Followup: Taliban displays large pile of bomb fragments, claims "U.S. efforts will soon share the fate of these bombs".
2001-11-06 01:07:59 PM  
Is it just me, or are US choppers very crashprone?

Fly any aircraft in bad weather and at low altitude and you'll have problems. Helicopters in general are more problematic because if the engine cuts out "they do not so much fly as...plummet."
2001-11-06 01:10:06 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

What you don't know makes you ignorant, and in this situation puts you at a much higher risk of death.
2001-11-06 01:11:06 PM  
Taliban: YAY!! We shot a chopper down!!

(he and everyone else near him is cut down by minigun fire from the thousands of other choppers sitting above him)
2001-11-06 01:11:11 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
PS: I am an idiot.
2001-11-06 01:11:48 PM  
Actually, if the engine cuts out the chopper will gradually fall back to Earth in a far safer way than any plane. Problems arise from crap like wind and airborne particles.

Oingy boingy boing!
2001-11-06 01:15:32 PM  
This war bores me now, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Perhaps you may not think so now, but I can almost guarantee it will be a complete anti-climax when they find Bin Laden and kill him. Like the whole millennium thing.

Well, perhaps 'bores' is the wrong word. That sounds a bit shiatty. But I certainly won't miss it.
2001-11-06 01:18:38 PM  
Copters have some limited autogyro capability, but you don't have much ability to pick a good landing spot, so you've got a good chance of the rotor hitting something. At which time the whole aircraft comes apart. If my light plane engine quits, I can glide for miles while choosing a place to set down.
2001-11-06 01:19:51 PM  
Gee Dr_Satan,

I'm sure the families of 6000 dead people in New York feel terribly sorry for you. How horrible it must be for you to be bored by this whole thing.
2001-11-06 01:19:54 PM  
We should give robot frank's friend robot ron a call. He'll sort it out.
2001-11-06 01:21:14 PM  
"Thousands of residents came out onto the street to see the metal parts and two tires, mounted on the back of a vehicle."

That must be the Aghanistan state fair or something.
2001-11-06 01:28:03 PM  
They were probably charged good money to see them.

Many of our helicopters don't even use wheels.
2001-11-06 01:28:50 PM  
I love how the news reports this, too..."The Taliban claim to have shot down a helicopter." Hey, media, thanks for giving their oh-so-important sources the slightest bit of credibility!
2001-11-06 01:30:00 PM  
wow, 31 days into the war and all they have to cheer about is some tires.
2001-11-06 01:33:06 PM  
They also displayed the hubcap to a 65' Wildcat and claim to have concurred Buick.
2001-11-06 01:36:13 PM  
They are probably Firestone tires. We need someplace to dump all those defective tires.

-goo goo gajoob
2001-11-06 01:37:04 PM  
Dammit, IamtheWalrus, you read my mind!

-he who stacks pork
2001-11-06 01:37:11 PM  
I found a sombrero in my back yard, I think we just may have conquered Mexico!!
2001-11-06 01:38:01 PM  
Oompa, actually, most of our helos have wheels: Apaches, Chinooks, Frogs (H-46s), H-3s, H-60s, and H-53s all have wheels, only the H-1 series (Cobras & Hueys) don't, and they're pretty much only used by the Marines now.

2001-11-06 01:38:29 PM  
Secretary Rumsfeld was quoted as saying: "We aren't allowed to dump our old Firestone tires in landfills in the US anymore. Dropping them on Afghanistan just seemed like a good idea at the time."
2001-11-06 01:39:07 PM  
Dammit walrus!
2001-11-06 01:43:45 PM  
News Flash:

Taliban scientists are perplexed after finding remnants of a new invention called the "wheel." Needless to say, the scientific community there is stumped at this modern marvel of technology.

Additional reports claim that something this big hasn't happened in Afghanistan since the discovery of "fire" late last year. Sources say that this discovery will no doubt shake the very foundations of the Afghan society.
2001-11-06 01:51:36 PM  
These aren't the droids you're looking for.
2001-11-06 01:51:53 PM  
Maybe after a couple more of those 15,000 lb bombs up their ass and they'll change their tune.
2001-11-06 01:55:37 PM  
I am an engineer for the company that designs and builds the helicopters they are claiming to have shot down. All I have to say is that we design and rigorously test these things to withstand the most extreme weather conditions-- even things that you wouldn't think of. I persoanlly, find it hard to believe that they crashed. From my perspective, it seems as if these helicopters would have to have been shot down. We really can't believe either sides' story since propaganda is a key factor in this "war." These helicopters have proven their toughness for decades, so it seems suspicious that they are crashing all of a sudden from heavy rain. And by the way, all of our helicopters have wheels.
2001-11-06 01:59:40 PM  
But do they have ejection seats?
2001-11-06 02:00:31 PM  
from all the pictures ive seen of afghanistan theyve all been sunny days.
2001-11-06 02:04:28 PM  

United Technologies?
2001-11-06 02:09:52 PM  
2001-11-06 02:22:29 PM  
The Pentagon (news - web sites) has denied an aircraft was downed. It said bad weather forced a helicopter to crash. All crew were rescued and the craft destroyed by fighter jets to prevent the Taliban taking sensitive equipment.

The aircraft crashed because of bad weather, but yet another aircraft rescued the crew, and yet another destroyed the craft. Doesn't make sense to me. Propaganda
2001-11-06 02:23:27 PM  
Just another piss ant attempt to make the US scared.
2001-11-06 02:25:26 PM  
Personally, I'll believe that this helicopter crashed as everyone survived. A shoot down would more likely kill everyone on board in my opinion.

And despite making a helicopter "to withstand the most extreme weather conditions" its still only going to be as good as its pilot.

My 2 cents.
2001-11-06 02:28:01 PM  
3M TA3 Destroying downed aircraft in enemy territory is standard operating procedure. As is rescuing downed airmen.

I guess I'm just not seeing what it so unplausible to you.
2001-11-06 02:31:42 PM  
It's kinda scary to me that the Afghans have not lost a war since the days of Genghis Khan - HE couldnt beat 'em, Russia couldn't beat em, and now they are laughing at us in their caves while they hear bombs dropping.

Do you realize those caverns go for MILES? And they have been reinforced with concrete and steel using Ben Ladens money?

It seems to me that the opposition forces are ready to get down and dirty, but the US is holding back.

Once we DO go in, there are going to be terrible losses. I can only imagine the booby (boobie?) traps in those caverns.
2001-11-06 02:32:36 PM  
What MAY have happened:

Taliban anti-aircraft missile strikes helicopter tail rotor pylon causing helicopter to spin out of control. Helicopter crashes hard from 75-100 foot altitude and catches fire. Injured crew escape into the hillside and signal for rescue. In the meantime, helicopter explodes. Crew rescued before being captured by camel-mounted Taliban. Taliban recover all that's left of helicopter (wheels, landing gear). US Defense department issues statement that helicopter crashed due to bad weather and instructs to "revise" their foreign weather reports. Game on.
2001-11-06 02:36:37 PM  
``Don't worry we will defeat the Americans and their allies,'' he said.

Uh, yeah, no worries bro.
2001-11-06 02:38:08 PM  
Army of fun, you missed my point.

If the first aircraft couldn't handle the weather, how did the other two have no problems with it? That is what I found strange.

(I understand about rescuing the crew and blowing up all the tech stuff.)
2001-11-06 02:40:06 PM  
Yeah. Firestone..... hehehe.
The wheels were already confirmed to from one of the Chinooks used in the "Airport Raid". They hit a wall and lost the gear. No biggy, they land with or without em. Saw a Chinook land it's back tires on a hillside bunker, drop trou, unload a squad while it blades whickered amongst the pines and the front hung over a cliff. Freaky.
2001-11-06 03:01:56 PM  
3M TA3 , ok I missed the point.

But I got it now...
2001-11-06 03:03:27 PM  
Gives me an idea, though... We could shoot millions of Firestone tires at them -- not good for much else.
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