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(Punogre)   Farker Ogre waxes his chest hair for your amusement (because he lost a bet)   ( punogre.com) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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2428 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Nov 2001 at 12:00 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

35 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-11-06 12:07:35 AM  
2001-11-06 12:07:57 AM  
"don't you think i'm so sexy, i'm just so fresh and clean"
2001-11-06 12:12:38 AM  
2001-11-06 12:15:44 AM  
2001-11-06 12:20:27 AM  
"...for your amusement..."

I think there is a difference of opinion here on what constitutes my "amusement".
2001-11-06 12:29:04 AM  
I'm so furry that would probably kill me.
2001-11-06 12:32:14 AM  
Is it just me...or did he look middle eastern?

2001-11-06 12:55:26 AM  
Im just waiting till the day some idiot ties his short hairs to a doorknob and slambs the door shut "for my amusement".
2001-11-06 01:01:43 AM  
Ogre, I think Nads was originally manufactured in Australia--where people can tolerate unacceptable amounts of pain (Mad Max). I succumbed to the incredible, stabbing gestures of the Nads "hair removal system" one fateful day this summer. Two friends of mine (who happen to be lesbians) convinced me to undergo the procedure after spending a day at the beach. The target area was the top of my back--which is (was) rather hairy. Well, after heating up the Nads in the microwave briefly, the application was similar to having roofing tar applied to one's flesh. I needed beer to continue so I started drinking. The first "pull" was the easiest, because I was still an innocent bystander without knowledge of the approaching sensation. It went downhill from there. It took Laura pulling the little fabric sheet off and Juanita holding the skin down, while I firmly (white knuckles) held onto their kitchen table gritting my teeth. We were all laughing hysterically--each for different reasons. I was laughing to conceal my whimpering, Laura was laughing at the blood, and white knuckled anticipation, and Juanite was laughing at the claims that Nads was "quick" and "painless". We repeated this procedure about ten to fifteen times to completely deforest the top of my back. They described a thousand little angry pools of blood where my folicles used to be planted. I actually puked up my Subway sandwich from lunch earlier in the day about half way through the procedure. I caught most of the hurl in my shirt, which was right in front of me on the table. The intense pain, mixed with laughter, and drinking a huge swig of Magic Hat beer...all coalesced to create an involunatary heave. It took a few minutes to clean up, but my back was only half done! I had to continue the grotesque procedure. I finished another beer and sat down resolved to finish what had been started...Jike John Rambo getting shocked...I just sort of tried to zone out. The girls were getting better at their "technique" near the end even though they continued to laugh at me...But by then my back was more like an oozing, Ctuhulu ritualized, fleshy pulp surface.

After the procedure, Luara read on the side of the box of Nads, that the skin should be very dry for "best results". Needless to say, I do not recommend going to the beach and hanging out in saltwater just 45 minutes before a Nads session. I also made the mistake of showering after the process. The angry, hairless raised pimples on my back felt like they harbored some sort of extra dimensional infestation the likes of which I can only associate with the H.P. Lovecraft inspired film, From Beyond. Although I must admit, after it was all over...I played the most relaxing game of Scrabble with my assistants in my whole life. They also let me borrow a Tori Amos shirt to wear home. I was too pacified to reject it, and it did seem acceptable--I felt as though I bonded with my vunerable female side after it was all said and done. The girls got a kick out of it, too.

Ogre, thanks for bringing the memories back with this article...It was a real treat!
2001-11-06 01:07:03 AM  
OK, how the fark do you view .asf files on a Mac (9.2.1)?
2001-11-06 01:15:07 AM  
you dont!
2001-11-06 01:28:29 AM  
Botsuraku_Hato: So you got your back waxed by lesbians, then one of them gave you a Tori Amos shirt to wear home...

Don't take this the wrong way, but that's the gayest thing I've heard in quite some time.
2001-11-06 01:34:42 AM  
Kapital: More gay than a man who drinks vanilla rum?
2001-11-06 01:48:40 AM  
Grey Ninja was tortured by Domina-Fems, and lived to tell the tale.

Much face gains he.
2001-11-06 01:49:23 AM  
Perhaps not but but in any case these guys are severe dorks.
2001-11-06 02:28:05 AM  
These post submissions are really really sad. An all-time low has been reached as of late. This is very dismal.

-he who stacks pork
2001-11-06 03:07:16 AM  
Please Define "severe dork", Nunchaku_nc.
2001-11-06 03:49:13 AM  
Well, sorry Leo, but I thought that was great! Ogre, that had me in fits! Thanks!

Now you men know why I don't shave/pluck/wax/whatever.
2001-11-06 04:00:31 AM  
what a crazy dude.... your nuts.....

2001-11-06 05:26:42 AM  
How much would waxing your balls hurt?
2001-11-06 05:31:50 AM  
Glad you guys liked it. I do some dumb shiat to entertain others.
2001-11-06 05:36:09 AM  
My turn, my turn! I'll sever my dork for your amusement, and you'll fukcing like it!
2001-11-06 05:37:00 AM  
Flamebait: Take it from someone who knows about removing the hair on his testicles....use a razor.
2001-11-06 05:56:23 AM  
Botsuraku_Hato: I drank too. It didn't help.
2001-11-06 07:02:02 AM  
what is an .asf file anyway?
2001-11-06 07:58:51 AM  
had me clenching my teeth

pretty funny ogre ;-)
now you must rename yourself to goblin!
2001-11-06 08:49:57 AM  
I'd rather fark a malfunctioning garbage disposal than read that site again.
2001-11-06 09:11:58 AM  
How derivative... yet... amusing!
2001-11-06 10:35:58 AM  
How about a Mac friendly version Ogre?
2001-11-06 11:27:25 AM  
I cannot watch that. . .ouch...

Friendly tip: Use clippers to cut the hair to a "reasonable" length so it's not like trying to wax your damn head.
2001-11-06 11:53:20 AM  
All this fuss over a little wax... How about using an Epilady next time, Ogre?...
2001-11-06 12:44:14 PM  
Nothing like a freshly shorn scrotum.. admit it, Ogre, you're never going back..
2001-11-06 04:06:04 PM  
hairless chests are sexy
2001-11-06 04:11:55 PM  
ouch..hurts just thinking about it...I feel your pain---
"Bill Clinton"
2001-11-06 05:19:26 PM  
Oooohh,F.K.--that's gonna hurt...What's your wife going to think?...I could see a radically different haircut to be "amusing",but this is like nails against a chalkboard...even if you shave,when it grows back,it's going to prickle like a sonofagun...
"I'll take armpits for $200,Alex.."
Just kidding...Rich
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