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(Press and Journal)   Kilt-wearers targetted by calf-implant inventor   ( divider line
    More: Unlikely  
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3959 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Sep 2003 at 10:35 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

57 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-09-24 08:32:23 AM  
I've got legs like a jockeys whip, and I don't care. It's just bra implants for men.

2003-09-24 10:00:55 AM  
Is that a small cow on your leg or are you just happy to see me?

2003-09-24 10:13:03 AM  
I'm always worried how my legs look when I put on my skirt.
2003-09-24 10:38:05 AM  
"We have implants in 'wee,' 'not-so-wee,' and 'FRIGGIN HUGE!'"
2003-09-24 10:41:01 AM  
Hmm... I never really thought of myself as "well-endowed" in the leg area, but I suppose that I am. Do women really thing that huge bulging calves are ultra-sexy? I guess I should wear more shorts and kilts from now on and the chicks will come running.
2003-09-24 10:41:42 AM  
how can that paper be the press & journal both?

pick one, i say.
2003-09-24 10:41:56 AM  
I'd wear mine backwards and say it's a parasitic infection.
2003-09-24 10:42:09 AM  
It's my firm belief that any Lowland Scot caught wearing a kilt should be shot. Highlanders should be let off on the grounds that they don't know any better.
2003-09-24 10:42:31 AM  
Hey there, 'squirrel legs.' Nice chicken legs, 'stick insect!'
2003-09-24 10:42:32 AM  
DAMN that headline had me confused. I was thinking "calf" as in "baby cow."
2003-09-24 10:43:19 AM  
I don't need these seeing how my legs are pretty chunky to start with.
2003-09-24 10:45:39 AM  
"The chance to wear lederhosen is the right of every German man"

'Nuff Said
2003-09-24 10:47:00 AM  
Easier solution: ride a bike on hilly roads 3x a week. Your calves will get that "naturally muscled" look.

Of course, you won't be able to wear "tapered leg" jeans anymore, but whatever.
2003-09-24 10:47:11 AM  
Strap some snakes on and you'll be stylin!
2003-09-24 10:47:39 AM  
Press and Journal?
This is the paper that reported the sinking of the Titanic with the headline "North East Man Lost at Sea"
2003-09-24 10:49:10 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

2003-09-24 10:54:19 AM  
Yes, Kilts may be a Scot's right, but Spandex is still a privilege.
2003-09-24 10:54:43 AM  
I think that wearing a kilt is stylish and comfortable...not to mention easy access for a grope or bj.
2003-09-24 10:56:54 AM  
Farked? Me no can load the link.

/bugga bugga
2003-09-24 11:00:23 AM  
the press & journal web site has a 'stick insect,' 'squirrel-legged' server, which could use some implants
2003-09-24 11:00:25 AM  
Mmmm...where is 3horn?
2003-09-24 11:01:31 AM  
Reminds me of:[The_Dead_Alewives]-[McGregors_Kilts​].mp3
2003-09-24 11:04:59 AM  
I think you also could get huge Calves by eating truckloads of Haggis, but I think that DEFINITION and TONE have to be more important to the lassies that mere size.

/keeping up the 'size doesn't matter myth'
2003-09-24 11:05:00 AM  
What happens when the drop to your ankles?
That must be awfully embarrassing
2003-09-24 11:07:08 AM  
Aparently Germans think its desierable to look like this. . .
[image from too old to be available]

Yeesh, "Der (die?) Wonderbra fr Mnner". Yah, my Deutsche sucks.
2003-09-24 11:07:31 AM  
These are just padded stockings, not calf implants, which as the name suggests, are worn under the skin. Misleading, to say the least.
2003-09-24 11:08:39 AM  
Hahahaha, silly non-recognizable umlaut thingys.
2003-09-24 11:12:40 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

This guy could use some.
2003-09-24 11:13:29 AM  
There was this dude on one of those lousy news magazine shows (20/20 or dateline or some shiat), he got himself some calf implants that wound up cutting off circulation to his legs from the knee down.

The show centered on this poor SOB's dozen trips under the knife to repair the damage, during his final surgery they were planning to amputate his legs but a miracle happened (or something) so they only had to COMPLETELY FARKING REMOVE HIS CALF MUSCLES.

Now he really has skinny legs.
2003-09-24 11:13:38 AM  
If its not scottish... ITS CRAPPPP !!!
2003-09-24 11:14:01 AM  
anyone see that show where the guy got calf implants?
It was...kinda disturbing...
forearm implants up next?
2003-09-24 11:17:13 AM  
syberpud wrote:
Easier solution: ride a bike on hilly roads 3x a week. Your calves will get that "naturally muscled" look.
Of course, you won't be able to wear "tapered leg" jeans anymore, but whatever
Syberpud hit it on the head. That and doing a ton o' calf raises in the gym.
Forget the "tapered leg" jeans...Try finding Kilt socks that fit 22 inch calves w/o knitting the fetid things yerself.
2003-09-24 11:26:02 AM  
I seriously thought when I read that tagline that 'calf implants' were tracking devices for stolen cows, and that they must have made their way into leather kilts, hence 'targeting' the wearers as thieves.

It's been a rough morning.
2003-09-24 11:30:04 AM  
He added: "It's impossible to tell the difference. It looks just like a well developed, muscular leg should be and is totally seamless."

But won't you look weird if you're really spindly all over but have enormously developed calves? You'd look like the victim of a glandular disorder.
2003-09-24 11:35:20 AM  
much like women's fashions, men engage in bodyshaping to impress other men.

guys don't really care about fashion, as any porn movie or magazine photo shoot easily show - just as women aren't wholly consumed with the max press or bicep circumference of their mate. (at least as far as they say, who knows what they really think)

yet women always go to great lengths to engage in fashion and grooming to an extent that 99% of men will never appreciate. Similarly men go to great lengths to engage in exercise and body-shaping to an extent that 99% of women don't seem to care about. Yes, women (and men) are big fans of tone and fitness of the opposite sex, but that isn't remotely in the same ballpark as calf-implants or 28" biceps.

not to be taken to the point that guys who try to get super-huge are automatically gay (no more than chicks who are fashion-obsessed are automatically lesbians) - but they aren't looking to go from 15" calves to 22" calves because chicks don't find them attractive yet.

they just have self-confidence issues.
2003-09-24 11:39:17 AM  
Someone post a pic of that a$$hat on MTV who got calf implants. He was too funny.
2003-09-24 11:39:51 AM  
much like women's fashions, men engage in bodyshaping to impress other men

Men engage in women's fashions to impress other men?

Sorry. Low blood sugar.

2003-09-24 11:44:52 AM  
This isn't all that new. They used to have, um, strap-on calves back in the good old days in England when men wore hose.
Not sure where I read that, but it made an impression.
2003-09-24 11:48:42 AM  
My mate used to write for this paper but his band got a record deal and he's moving to L.A. His leaving do's tomorrow, the bastard!
2003-09-24 12:10:01 PM  
img src="​795190.j pg>"
Who needs implants when you have calves like mine?
2003-09-24 12:11:11 PM  
[image from too old to be available]

2003-09-24 12:23:49 PM  
Do people really think big calves are sexy? Mine are farking huge (yes, it's all muscle. Very toned and well defined, too.), but I think it looks kind of stupid. Then again, I only have slightly larger than average thighs, so my calves, at their widest, are about equal to my thighs, 4-5 inches above the knee.

Strange thing is, when I *begun* going to the gym, I could do more calf raises, with heavier weights, than my friend, who had been going there regularly for 9 months.
2003-09-24 12:46:01 PM  
sdw3u that picture Need sex all of a sudden. Where's my scottish boy? At work? Dammit. Right hand? ooh, look, she's right here on my keyboard! C'mere honey!

Do women really thing that huge bulging calves are ultra-sexy?

I wouldn't say ULTRA. But definately sexy. Ja.
2003-09-24 12:48:53 PM  
AAAH HA HA! and I didn't even see the arrow or the "Otch!" comment! Nice. :D
2003-09-24 12:52:05 PM  
Yeah, okay, calf implants. No little baby cows, as Ithought from the headline. They must be kind of like knee pads that yo ujust scoot down a little over your calves and trun around.
Aye, it's oh so sexy.
2003-09-24 01:21:07 PM  
Falsies for your calves so you can look 'manly' in a kilt? OK, I've worn a kilt for a while and I can tell you from personal experience: If you aren't scary enough looking to supress derogatory comments by sheer physical stature, you'd better have the stones enough to get in someone's face when they give you flak about wearing a 'skirt.' Given that anyone who buys these leg-falsies obviously hasn't got the physique (or else they wouldn't be buying them, would they?) I seriously doubt that they'll have the fortitude to throw down with someone who decides to give them shiat about their attire. And honestly, how could anyone live down the shame of being the guy in a skirt that got his butt whipped and had someone expose his leg-falsies?

/kilt-wearin', beer-swillin', ain't takin' no shiat from no one
2003-09-24 01:39:18 PM  

Where do you get your kilts? I am looking for a nice place to buy a kilt for my boyfriend. Any suggestions?
2003-09-24 02:10:49 PM  
My most recent one I hand tailored. That way it's a guaranteed fit, exactly how I want it. And from now on that's the only way I'll do it: Buy the yardage and do it myself.
Drop me an email (clicky-da-profile for it) and I can give you a list of sites with reasonable prices on kilts and accessories, and just plain tartan wool if you're into making your own clothes.
2003-09-24 02:46:30 PM  
Calf-enhancing wooden blocks were popular, not just among kilted gentlemen of the Highlands, but with trews- and breeches-wearing lowland and English (and colonial) gentlemen throughout the 18th century.

In that period, the calf was considered the sexiest part of a man by women, so men went to great lengths to have great calves, and if they didn't have 'em, to fake 'em.

I don't need to worry. I've always had naturally magnificent calves.
2003-09-24 02:57:25 PM  
Gestate yer own baby livestock?

A Scotsman's dream, that is!
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