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(Time)   Bill Gates wants to reinvent the toilet. Supposedly it won't crash as often as Windows   (time.com) divider line
    More: Strange, Bill Gates, U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki, Die Welt, Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, water resources, source of energy, UNICEF, development goals  
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8873 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jul 2011 at 10:53 AM (9 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2011-07-13 11:23:19 AM  
FTA: "Human waste could be a real gold mine, Rijsberman jokes."

It's panning for nuggets that's the problem.
 
2011-07-13 11:26:12 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: BWOD?


BMOD - bowel movement of death. People are already familiar with these, even.

/goes better with saran wrap.
 
2011-07-13 11:27:48 AM  
Would someone with Photoshop skills please create a toilet with a Microsoft logo and Ctrl-Alt-Del buttons?

/KTHXBYE
 
2011-07-13 11:28:15 AM  
Toilets really are a problem, though. Most of them are low-flow and couldn't carry a turd. The apartment I'm in now at least has a toilet with a jet engine or something. Doesn't cop out when Taco Bell is about.

/Also, black people leave logs in the toilet and don't flush.
//That could be the sanitary problem.
 
2011-07-13 11:29:09 AM  

Mentat: I don't want to brag, but I've never had to flush my toilet running Ubuntu. 3 straight ears with no clogs.


Yeah, but when they put the tank underneath the bowl and replaced the handle with
a footpedal in the Poopy Peacock release I gave up and went to Mintcake XFCE. At
least with that you decide where the plumbing goes.
 
2011-07-13 11:31:01 AM  

unalivezombie: Frehar: Do you have to wait 20 minutes for it to boot up before you can use it?


I'm more worried about it getting locked up several times a day.


I'm worried about that happening to me.
 
2011-07-13 11:33:32 AM  
He just wants to be able to say with a straight face "I spent 3 months on the toilet"


/terlet
 
2011-07-13 11:35:41 AM  
God dammit, I agree with Bill Gates on something.

Compost toilets are a great idea. I do think one that is designed to allow for people to squat are best- they naturally align the body to get the crap out as efficiently and quickly as possible. Sorry guys, less time on your ipods and computers when on the bill.
 
2011-07-13 11:36:18 AM  
I can count on one hand the amount of times some variant of Windows has crashed on me over the years.

Had an Apple IIE that I managed to crash all the time with some modeling software I was using.

Had SillyCon Indys and Octanes core dump on me all the time when using ProE FEM / ProMan etc.

Never used Vista so I can't comment on that.
 
2011-07-13 11:38:54 AM  

Nadie_AZ: I do think one that is designed to allow for people to squat are best


You'd love Asia.
 
2011-07-13 11:39:15 AM  

animisparati: Say what you will, Bill Gates will continue to show by action what a phenomenal human being he is..

To quote:
"It's not who you are inside, but what you DO that defines you."


Uh, like being a convicted criminal in charge of a company convicted of crimes?

If you ever want a laugh at what a scumbag Bill Gates is, just read his deposition testimony about his actions during the antitrust trial. It's actually hilarious.
 
2011-07-13 11:40:24 AM  

I am not a Limivore: Would someone with Photoshop skills please create a toilet with a Microsoft logo and Ctrl-Alt-Del buttons?

/KTHXBYE


What a Windows toilet might look like:
teufelaffe.comView Full Size
 
2011-07-13 11:40:46 AM  

H31N0US: I can count on one hand the amount of times some variant of Windows has crashed on me over the years.


Some kind of multiple-finger deformation where you have 80 fingers on your hands?

You should be a masseuse.
 
2011-07-13 11:42:44 AM  
Oh ha ha ha, too bad I've had this Windows machine running for like 30 days strai
 
2011-07-13 11:43:00 AM  

brap: Just last night I was just watching a documentary about the benefits of composting toilets in sub-Saharan climates. Just mix in a bit of ash and you've got great fertilizer every eight months or so.

Yes, I live a life full of excitement and intrigue.


Had some in-laws who had a composting toilet. They lived in southern Ohio, so not sub-Saharan. Did work pretty well, on the overall. Not too much stink, but you had to put the paper somewhere other than the toilet, which had a liberal dose of the eww factor.

Right now we've got septic, which works pretty well. The leach field, though new, doesn't work quite as well as I'd like (farking Ohio clay), but it's not too problematic at this point.

What I really want, however, is farking toilets that actually flush. I had one that got stopped up with a single turd a few days ago. Not even turd and paper, just the turd. Stupid low-flush toilets that need to be flushed twice (minimally) for every poo. Not saving a bunch of water there.
 
2011-07-13 11:44:03 AM  
For years I have peed in the sink, and flushed w/ washing my hands. 1 quart of water
 
2011-07-13 11:52:09 AM  

ronaprhys: What I really want, however, is farking toilets that actually flush. I had one that got stopped up with a single turd a few days ago. Not even turd and paper, just the turd. Stupid low-flush toilets that need to be flushed twice (minimally) for every poo. Not saving a bunch of water there.


You've got a bad toilet -- buy a better one next time. Your complaint isn't "low-flow." I've got one, dual flush, Costco special (cost me $150) and it's the best thing ever -- I love it more than my wife. It cradles my ass gently and coerces the waste out while it relaxes me. It's phenomenal. It's like a tiny porcelain orgasm.

Check out Costco.
 
2011-07-13 11:59:29 AM  
Apple will release one that will look much nicer, be easier to use, won't break down as easy, rarely if ever clogs but will be 3 times the price. And only 10% of the world will buy it and the other 90% will assume their idiot douchebag hipsters for doing so.
 
2011-07-13 12:00:31 PM  

Tatsuhiko: /Microsoft Windows sucks so much it runs great right after the install.
//Right before you start installing your iTunes


I think I found your problem.


unalivezombie: Frehar: Do you have to wait 20 minutes for it to boot up before you can use it?

I'm more worried about it getting locked up several times a day.


ITT: etch-a-sketch users.

/one day we'll let you play with the grown-up computers
//Win7 box boots from a cold powered-off to the web browser loading in ~ 50 seconds... including POST. (SSD boot drive FTW.)
///and it can run Crysis on high.
 
2011-07-13 12:02:47 PM  

bigdavediode: animisparati: Say what you will, Bill Gates will continue to show by action what a phenomenal human being he is..

To quote:
"It's not who you are inside, but what you DO that defines you."

Uh, like being a convicted criminal in charge of a company convicted of crimes?

If you ever want a laugh at what a scumbag Bill Gates is, just read his deposition testimony about his actions during the antitrust trial. It's actually hilarious.


Yeah, Job's is much cooler, he just steals buys the livers from people ahead of him on the waiting list and gives almost nothing to charity.
 
2011-07-13 12:05:05 PM  

bigdavediode: ronaprhys: What I really want, however, is farking toilets that actually flush. I had one that got stopped up with a single turd a few days ago. Not even turd and paper, just the turd. Stupid low-flush toilets that need to be flushed twice (minimally) for every poo. Not saving a bunch of water there.

You've got a bad toilet -- buy a better one next time. Your complaint isn't "low-flow." I've got one, dual flush, Costco special (cost me $150) and it's the best thing ever -- I love it more than my wife. It cradles my ass gently and coerces the waste out while it relaxes me. It's phenomenal. It's like a tiny porcelain orgasm.

Check out Costco.


Came with the house, no real choice there. I'd have to pay out of pocket to get better. As it is now, I simply poo at work 5 days a week and then try to be more careful at home and pinch more frequently.

And yes, my complaint is low flow. I've pooed in many a different low flow toilet and have always had problems. In fact, most of my friends have had the same issue. As for the cradling issue, that's the seat itself, not the toilet.
 
2011-07-13 12:12:52 PM  
What else would you expect from someone so used to making a living selling repackaged shiat?
 
2011-07-13 12:16:09 PM  
Well, what we're talking about in, erm, privy terms is the very latest in front-wall, fresh-air orifices, combined with a wide-capacity gutter installation below.
 
2011-07-13 12:18:18 PM  
How long before Apple releases the iPoop ?
 
2011-07-13 12:19:27 PM  

TommyymmoT: How long before Apple releases the iPoop ?


iPoop (new window)
 
2011-07-13 12:21:22 PM  

bigdavediode: animisparati: Say what you will, Bill Gates will continue to show by action what a phenomenal human being he is..

To quote:
"It's not who you are inside, but what you DO that defines you."

Uh, like being a convicted criminal in charge of a company convicted of crimes?

If you ever want a laugh at what a scumbag Bill Gates is, just read his deposition testimony about his actions during the antitrust trial. It's actually hilarious.


Meh, at least he's making up for it in his later years. The amount of charitable work he's done far outshines what most of his contemporaries and probably most of us on FARK would give if we had his money.

It's hard to call him a scumbag about things 13 years ago when he's making amends. Like the quote says, it's what you do. When you wanna talk about scumbags at least start with the people who cling to their wealth to the grave.
 
2011-07-13 12:26:45 PM  

jaymanchu: Apple will release one that will look much nicer, be easier to use, won't break down as easy, rarely if ever clogs only accept Apple brand toilet paper, will reject your bowel movements if it detects anything in them Apple doesn't approve of, but and will be 3 times the price. It will lack simple features like flushing and using water, which will be added in a patch 12-18 months after launch. In addition, Apple will sue American Standard and other toilet makers for patent infringement for having a toilet seat that is shaped similarly to the iCrapper. And only 10% of the world will buy it and the other 90% will assume their idiot douchebag hipsters for doing so will insist that it's still a better toilet than all the others out there.


FTFY
 
2011-07-13 12:28:46 PM  

brap: Just last night I was just watching a documentary about the benefits of composting toilets in sub-Saharan climates. Just mix in a bit of ash and you've got great fertilizer every eight months or so.

Yes, I live a life full of excitement and intrigue.


I do not always talk about shiat on the internet... but when I do, I do it on Fark.
 
2011-07-13 12:32:01 PM  
Great idea, lets spend tens of millions of tax payer dollars on the Africans because they are too lazy to dig a latrine. These people aren't even trying anymore. Cutoff the aid and see how quick they start to improve their quality of life.
 
2011-07-13 12:32:20 PM  

animisparati: Say what you will, Bill Gates will continue to show by action what a phenomenal human being he is..


I just wish he would have started being this "phenomenal human being" while he was president of Microsoft. Think of how much he could have improved the world then, how much capital he could have freed up for the good of humanity, etc., etc.
 
2011-07-13 12:33:46 PM  
He points out that, despite all the recent achievements, 40% of the world's population, or some 2.5 billion people, still lives without proper means of flushing away excrement.

Why don't those people just move to where the toilets are?
 
2011-07-13 12:35:15 PM  

Mishno: If you ever want a laugh at what a scumbag Bill Gates is, just read his deposition testimony about his actions during the antitrust trial. It's actually hilarious.

Yeah, Job's is much cooler, he just steals buys the livers from people ahead of him on the waiting list and gives almost nothing to charity.


I don't care if Jobs is a world-class piece of shiat. Bill Gates IS a world class piece of shiat. Did you know that two shiats can exist at the same time? It's not like matter and anti-matter, where if Steve Jobs meets Bill Gates they explode as a shiat and anti-shiat.

What a piece of shiat might look like:

larsumlaut.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
2011-07-13 12:35:26 PM  

detfrost1: For years I have peed in the sink, and flushed w/ washing my hands. 1 quart of water


Gives a whole new meaning to the word "p-trap".

/ewww...
 
2011-07-13 12:36:59 PM  

Electromax: Meh, at least he's making up for it in his later years. The amount of charitable work he's done far outshines what most of his contemporaries and probably most of us on FARK would give if we had his money.

It's hard to call him a scumbag about things 13 years ago when he's making amends. Like the quote says, it's what you do. When you wanna talk about scumbags at least start with the people who cling to their wealth to the grave.


That's a good point -- in 13 years Casey Anthony and OJ Simpson really won't be that bad. 13 years after John Wayne Gacy killed kids, he was really a nice guy.

Except Gates did more damage to society.
 
2011-07-13 12:38:59 PM  
img683.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
2011-07-13 12:39:18 PM  

ronaprhys: And yes, my complaint is low flow. I've pooed in many a different low flow toilet and have always had problems. In fact, most of my friends have had the same issue. As for the cradling issue, that's the seat itself, not the toilet.


Man you are missing out. Your ass is missing out. There aren't any problems with low-flow toilets anymore -- my toilet all but gently cradles the shiats, make them feel warm all over, balances them, aligns their tires and gingerly carries them on their way to their final fulfillment.
 
2011-07-13 12:39:33 PM  

ranold: [www.poopreport.com image 400x207]


Came for the Demolition Man reference. Leaving happy.
 
2011-07-13 12:40:06 PM  

bigdavediode: Electromax: Meh, at least he's making up for it in his later years. The amount of charitable work he's done far outshines what most of his contemporaries and probably most of us on FARK would give if we had his money.

It's hard to call him a scumbag about things 13 years ago when he's making amends. Like the quote says, it's what you do. When you wanna talk about scumbags at least start with the people who cling to their wealth to the grave.

That's a good point -- in 13 years Casey Anthony and OJ Simpson really won't be that bad. 13 years after John Wayne Gacy killed kids, he was really a nice guy.

Except Gates did more damage to society.


Exactly. The stuff he's doing now, while great, is penance.
 
2011-07-13 12:52:28 PM  

Xenomech: bigdavediode: Electromax: Meh, at least he's making up for it in his later years. The amount of charitable work he's done far outshines what most of his contemporaries and probably most of us on FARK would give if we had his money.

It's hard to call him a scumbag about things 13 years ago when he's making amends. Like the quote says, it's what you do. When you wanna talk about scumbags at least start with the people who cling to their wealth to the grave.

That's a good point -- in 13 years Casey Anthony and OJ Simpson really won't be that bad. 13 years after John Wayne Gacy killed kids, he was really a nice guy.

Except Gates did more damage to society.

Exactly. The stuff he's doing now, while great, is penance.


Wow.

I think if you're equating Bill Gates with John Wayne Gacey you need to see a mental
health professional immediately. Or you're Richard Stallman, and if you are I have the
same advice: seek help now.
 
2011-07-13 12:55:49 PM  

bigdavediode: Mishno: If you ever want a laugh at what a scumbag Bill Gates is, just read his deposition testimony about his actions during the antitrust trial. It's actually hilarious.

Yeah, Job's is much cooler, he just steals buys the livers from people ahead of him on the waiting list and gives almost nothing to charity.

I don't care if Jobs is a world-class piece of shiat. Bill Gates IS a world class piece of shiat. Did you know that two shiats can exist at the same time? It's not like matter and anti-matter, where if Steve Jobs meets Bill Gates they explode as a shiat and anti-shiat.

What a piece of shiat might look like:

[larsumlaut.files.wordpress.com image 426x298]


When you devote years of your life and a massive proportion of your personal fortune to developing solutions to problems like: the spread of polio in 3rd world countries, providing educational opportunities to socio-economically disadavantaged children, or donating hundreds of millions of dollars to basic reseach for HIV/AIDS cures - then you can call him whatever you like. Until then - you should shut up, sit down, and learn some lessons from him.
 
2011-07-13 12:59:19 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Wow.

I think if you're equating Bill Gates with John Wayne Gacey you need to see a mental health professional immediately. Or you're Richard Stallman, and if you are I have the same advice: seek help now.


Yeah. What the fark? He managed to screw over some companies who - given half a chance - would have done the same to Microsoft.

Where's the war crime?
 
2011-07-13 12:59:48 PM  
FTFA: He says there are biological bacteria that could turn waste into compost;

Is there some sort of inorganic bacteria of which I'm not aware? :o
 
2011-07-13 1:04:14 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Wow.

I think if you're equating Bill Gates with John Wayne Gacey you need to see a mental
health professional immediately. Or you're Richard Stallman, and if you are I have the
same advice: seek help now.


Well, we can't all be severely short-sighted, I suppose.


/no wonder all those corrupt bankers and corporate executives almost always get off scot-free
 
2011-07-13 1:41:42 PM  

Xenomech: DjangoStonereaver: Wow.

I think if you're equating Bill Gates with John Wayne Gacey you need to see a mental
health professional immediately. Or you're Richard Stallman, and if you are I have the
same advice: seek help now.

Well, we can't all be severely short-sighted, I suppose.


/no wonder all those corrupt bankers and corporate executives almost always get off scot-free


bigdavediode: Electromax: Meh, at least he's making up for it in his later years. The amount of charitable work he's done far outshines what most of his contemporaries and probably most of us on FARK would give if we had his money.

It's hard to call him a scumbag about things 13 years ago when he's making amends. Like the quote says, it's what you do. When you wanna talk about scumbags at least start with the people who cling to their wealth to the grave.

That's a good point -- in 13 years Casey Anthony and OJ Simpson really won't be that bad. 13 years after John Wayne Gacy killed kids, he was really a nice guy.

Except Gates did more damage to society.


Call me when any of those strawmen you mention donate millions to the kinds of research mentioned above and maybe we can talk about how people can change. You're like those folks who namedrop Hitler comparisons when talking about some nobody. If OJ started dedicating his life to helping others, sure I might reevaluate my opinion of him.

Just because people did something bad in the past (and no one is denying that Gates never did wrong), once again the quote talked about "it's what you do". It sounds like you've already made up your mind about Gates regardless of what he might do for the rest of his life because of his past transgressions, but not everyone has.

It's also impossible to argue "damage to society" if you try to weigh potential benefits that MS/Windows brought to society. I know folks like you will likely argue that number is zero but a whole lot of businesses and jobs wouldn't exist without them.

/hmph, i need to start remembering to uncheck this "email about replies" box
//we can all just agree to disagree
 
2011-07-13 2:23:09 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Wow.

I think if you're equating Bill Gates with John Wayne Gacey you need to see a mental
health professional immediately. Or you're Richard Stallman, and if you are I have the
same advice: seek help now.


Really? You think John Wayne Gacy did more overall damage to society? Please explain.

Please include the jobs lost at Stac Electronics in your response.

http://techrights.org/comes-vs-microsoft/text/msg00179.html
 
2011-07-13 2:25:03 PM  

Electromax: Just because people did something bad in the past (and no one is denying that Gates never did wrong), once again the quote talked about "it's what you do". It sounds like you've already made up your mind about Gates regardless of what he might do for the rest of his life because of his past transgressions, but not everyone has.


First off, don't use the term "strawman" since you can't use it correctly. Secondly, whether everyone decides on something is appeal ad populum and worthless. Thirdly, Al Capone was very generous, as are most mob bosses. That does not excuse their behavior, nor the damage they've done.
 
2011-07-13 2:26:29 PM  

PIP_the_TROLL: Yeah. What the fark? He managed to screw over some companies who - given half a chance - would have done the same to Microsoft.

Where's the war crime?


The other companies would have broken the law? The other companies would have stolen code? The other companies would have violated their agreements?

Oh well, okay. I guess we'll never know because all those companies no longer exist.
 
2011-07-13 2:27:34 PM  

bemis23: When you devote years of your life and a massive proportion of your personal fortune to developing solutions to problems like: the spread of polio in 3rd world countries, providing educational opportunities to socio-economically disadavantaged children, or donating hundreds of millions of dollars to basic reseach for HIV/AIDS cures - then you can call him whatever you like. Until then - you should shut up, sit down, and learn some lessons from him.


No thanks, I'd rather be a good person.
 
2011-07-13 2:45:36 PM  

Xenomech: Exactly. The stuff he's doing now, while great, is penance.


I'll take good from wherever it comes from. Andrew Carnegie was a miserable bastard, FAR worse than Gates. Carnegie screwed over PLENTY of other businesses, and made his fortune on the backs of laborers which he mistreated. Later in life he gave most of his fortune away. Whether it was about guilt or legacy building, I really don't care. Whenever good works are done, I will applaud them.
 
2011-07-13 2:50:21 PM  

nekom: Whether it was about guilt or legacy building, I really don't care. Whenever good works are done, I will applaud them.


Applaud good works, but never applaud the man. Always know that he will shove a shiv in your back.
 
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