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(ESPN)   Cryogenic company to Ted Williams' son: "Pay us or we thaw the corpse"   (sports.espn.go.com) divider line
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10763 clicks; posted to Main » and Sports » on 14 Aug 2003 at 3:19 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



117 Comments     (+0 »)
 


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2003-08-14 1:53:37 PM  
Where are all the Hinkley(sp?) type of nuts out there who want to get famous by shooting someone? Unlike Ronald Reagan, John Henry Williams ISN'T popular. If some crazy psycho were to frag that SOB in Boston or San Diego, the judge would sentence him to $150 fine and time served... and a parade.
 
2003-08-14 2:55:37 PM  
It's a corpse, you *%#$@* fraud. Give Ted Williams a decent burial.
 
2003-08-14 3:17:52 PM  
Good news, Red Sox fans. Ted Williams had a sit down with Babe Ruth and agreed to extend the curse until 2118 at the earliest.
 
2003-08-14 3:21:48 PM  
Aww, looks like his Pop's Sicle is going to melt.
 
2003-08-14 3:24:31 PM  
His head has been accidentally cracked 10 times? How exactly does that happen? Are they spilling hot coffee on it or something?

And why is Teddy Ballgame's DNA so desired? Look at the offspring it produces... ugh.
 
2003-08-14 3:24:43 PM  
Lean Cuisine anyone?
 
2003-08-14 3:25:11 PM  
[image from shillpages.com too old to be available]
 
2003-08-14 3:26:32 PM  
LOL. This asshat's living was having pops sign autographs and selling them. Now he wants to make money by selling the old man's DNA? Can't he get a job or something? I'm not sure under what circumstance someone would want the old man's DNA- he wasn't a great hitter because of genetics, but because of practice.

Step 1. Freeze father's corpse.
Step 2.
Step 3. Make profit!

 
2003-08-14 3:26:49 PM  
When I did a research project on Alcor for a high school class, their website recommended buying a life-insurance policy and using the money from that to pay for the cost of keeping you there forever. So why didn't the Williams family do that?
 
2003-08-14 3:27:42 PM  
lol Coleslaw!
 
2003-08-14 3:27:45 PM  
Ya know the Lean Cuisine thai chicken is G-R-E-A-T
 
2003-08-14 3:28:33 PM  
As a Cubs fan I have nothing to say on the matter, except that I would allow Sammy to take a corket bat to John Henry's head, no less that 10 trillion times.
 
2003-08-14 3:28:46 PM  
I must be reading the wrong article. Where does it say they're selling his DNA?

/scratching head
 
2003-08-14 3:29:05 PM  
The whole bit about "neurosperation" and drilling is fugging sick.
 
SGF
2003-08-14 3:29:27 PM  
If I were being cryogenically preserved, my brain is actually the second thing I'd have thrown in the freezer.

BTW I've heard of brain-freeze, but this must be Waaay nastier than drinking your Slurpee too fast

/chillin'
 
2003-08-14 3:29:37 PM  
so sick of this, I wish they would just bury him and his son along with him.
 
2003-08-14 3:29:47 PM  
Don't just let him thaw, stick him the bed next to his kid while he sleeps so he can wake up to the nasty, rotten smell and look of his daddy's rotting remains. F'n little greedy son of a biatch.
 
2003-08-14 3:29:59 PM  
Fark, they accidentally cracked his head 10 times??? And they still expect to get paid?

I still think the son is insane... but what's up with Alcor using "The Splendid Splinter"'s noggin for batting practice?
 
2003-08-14 3:30:12 PM  
When I did a research project on Alcor for a high school class, their website recommended buying a life-insurance policy and using the money from that to pay for the cost of keeping you there forever. So why didn't the Williams family do that?

cause that would make too much sense...
kinda like NOT tricking your father into signing freezer bag paperwork and getting his head whacked from his cold dead body makes too much sense...
 
2003-08-14 3:30:16 PM  
Anyone listen to Jim Rome talk about this yesterday. I guess his son had some greasy ass piece of paper that he found in his trunk saying Ted wanted to be frozen, and some how this piece of paper supersceeded his living will and testament. Amazing how this took place. I guess when Ted signed anything important it was always signed by his legal name, and not just Ted Williams like the cryogenic paper said.
 
2003-08-14 3:30:28 PM  
"Good news, Red Sox fans. Ted Williams had a sit down with Babe Ruth and agreed to extend the curse until 2118 at the earliest."

But they're really close to finding Babe's piano at the bottom of Willis Pond. Really!
 
2003-08-14 3:30:59 PM  
Ted Williams DNA, so thats what Bonds and McGuire have been injecting, not steroids!
 
2003-08-14 3:31:01 PM  
What Ted Williams, cracked, splintered, hole-in-the-head, ruined self will look like when they finally bring him back to life:


[image from members.aon.at too old to be available]

 
2003-08-14 3:31:51 PM  
Holy

the original story yesterday or the day before was about 8 vials of his DNA coming up missing... so either someone's selling them, or OJ's spreading them on his gloves, shoes and car upholstery in preparation for his next move...
 
2003-08-14 3:32:20 PM  
Braiinnsss! Braiinnnnssss! Braiinnnsssss!
 
2003-08-14 3:32:40 PM  
leahrostova:

that's great leah! I did a project on cryonics (in general) when i was in the...6th grade i think. That would be, roughly 900 years ago.

Alcor was in business at the time and I called them and actually spoke with someone there at length. The fact that they spoke to me for such a long time just proves that they are nuts. They sent me some cool magazines and whatnot - but when I did some research at the library, I learned about this decapitation approach and even a report where they had some legal dispute due to "guns, lots of guns" at the company.
 
2003-08-14 3:33:33 PM  
Anyone else think of "John Brown's Body?" No?

Ted Williams' body lies a-freezing in the liquid nitro,
Ted Williams' body lies a-freezing in the liquid nitro,
Ted Williams' body lies a-freezing in the liquid nitro,
His DNA keeps marching on...


OK, so maybe it isn't that funny.
 
2003-08-14 3:34:08 PM  
goblue
Thanks, I thought my eyes just cut off part of the article. Like Nicole Brown's head...

/nuttin
 
2003-08-14 3:34:09 PM  
Ted Williams for dinner tonight, kids!
 
2003-08-14 3:34:47 PM  
Now, i don't think the cryogenic would work anyways, but it might make it a little tougher now that his head has been chopped off.
 
2003-08-14 3:35:03 PM  
A pathetic way to treat an American combat veteran who saw action not, one, but two wars....
 
2003-08-14 3:35:16 PM  
The head is stored in a separate steel can filled with liquid nitrogen. It has been shaved, drilled with holes and accidentally cracked 10 times, the magazine reported.


damn that's funny
 
2003-08-14 3:35:23 PM  
Pragmatically, I'd caution to Alcor that Ted Williams is the best publicity that institution has ever had, and it may not want to blow all that just because John Henry Williams is a np-good deadbeat (besides, most people in baseball already knew that).
 
2003-08-14 3:35:35 PM  
Icy dead people....(say it out loud....)
 
2003-08-14 3:35:48 PM  
The head is stored in a separate steel can filled with liquid nitrogen. It has been shaved, drilled with holes and accidentally cracked 10 times


that's what happens when you crowd the plate.


/ got nuthin'
 
2003-08-14 3:36:39 PM  
"I'm crushing your head" -as he makes pincher motion with his hand........
 
2003-08-14 3:37:48 PM  
Alcor's website is Farked.
 
2003-08-14 3:38:46 PM  
If your head (not yours, personally, but that of the frozen deceased) "accidentally" cracks ten times, are you still interested in paying full price? I think not. How about a little customer service, people?
 
2003-08-14 3:39:19 PM  
Why is everyone losing their head about a little payment mix up? Maybe cooler heads will prevail.
 
2003-08-14 3:40:10 PM  
Send in the clowns.
 
2003-08-14 3:40:11 PM  
Dad?....DAAAAAD!!!!
[image from arches.uga.edu too old to be available]
 
2003-08-14 3:40:52 PM  
[image from tvcentral.com.ar too old to be available]
 
2003-08-14 3:40:59 PM  
Fark'em all. He's dead. Just like everyone who's died before him. What makes him so special that he's suppose to rise back from the dead and walk the earth again. Give another poor soul a chance and drop this crap already.

Let's see,
He's frozen. Which crystalizes the muscle tissue and is irreparable.

His head is detached from his body. I don't think we have a cure for THAT one just yet.

Holes in his head. Yeah, like the ones he had BEFORE having his body frozen.

Dropped and cracked? How does someone expect a company that can't even take care of the body to acutally repair it in a hundred years or so.

Ugh. Society...
 
2003-08-14 3:41:26 PM  
This is just a travesty. I don't know how John Henry can even sleep at night.
 
2003-08-14 3:42:08 PM  
You crack it, you pay 4 it!
 
2003-08-14 3:42:18 PM  
Come on now, Teddy has joined an elite club of frozen celebrities: Walt Disney, Hitler's Brain, . . .

Maybe not that elite.

Seriously, let the poor man have some peace.
 
2003-08-14 3:42:45 PM  
Where are the posts from Frostillicus when you need them?

/Apu, time has ravaged your once youthfull looks
 
2003-08-14 3:43:24 PM  
This other article gives a little more detail regarding this.
 
2003-08-14 3:43:31 PM  
The Big Turd: Or else the head coolers will previal.
 
2003-08-14 3:43:44 PM  
Let me explain what 'cracking' his head means. What they did to his head is dunk it in a special solution and then freeze it with liquid nitrogen. The solution freezes into a glass around and inside the cells, and unlike water it does not expand when it freezes, so there is no damage done by cell bursting. Theoretically, sometime in the far future they can thaw the head and it will be as fresh as the day it was taken off his body (for whatever good that does).

The problem is, this solution needs to be kept in a 10 degree temperature range near the temperature of liquid nitrogen. If it's allowed to go outside that range, it cracks. Like glass. Apparently this has happened several times...and there are 10 cracks running through Ted Williams' skull and brain, probably all the way through, just as if someone took a sledgehammer to a crystal ball.

If I were ever to consider getting myself or my loved ones frozen (and I wouldn't), I'd stay far the hell away from *this* company.
 
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