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(Yahoo)   The British just got lazier; paying people to queue for them   ( divider line
    More: Stupid  
•       •       •

3343 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Oct 2001 at 5:12 PM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

49 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-10-21 05:22:09 PM  
Useless trivia: queue is the only word that is pronounced exactly the same after removing the last four letters.
2001-10-21 05:28:36 PM  
They should start a queue union, so that they can earn big bucks and never be fired just for standing in line.

I wonder if there's a code of conduct? Do they get bonuses for cutting?
2001-10-21 05:29:07 PM  
How is this stupid? Its what makes capitalism great...
2001-10-21 05:36:17 PM  
2001-10-21 05:50:01 PM  
But.. what are they standing in line for?
2001-10-21 05:52:45 PM  
If I could only get someone else to take a dump for me, I wouldn't have to leave the couch.......
2001-10-21 05:54:01 PM  
Worst article ever.
2001-10-21 06:01:05 PM  
Where have you been? This service has been available in Los Angeles and New York since the early 90s.

What's the big deal? If you bill $300 an hour as a consultant, what's the big deal for paying $50 an hour to someone else to stand in line for you?
2001-10-21 06:03:43 PM  
I concur. This has been going on for a long time.

BTW, I'm asking $40/hour.
2001-10-21 06:08:49 PM  
The 20 pounds that this company charges comes out to around $28.
2001-10-21 06:16:42 PM  
I wonder if the French will ever get this lazy and pay someone to surrender for them?
2001-10-21 06:17:31 PM  
20 pounds an hour seems pretty expensive for just standing there. In fact, the government ought to require anyone on the dole to do it for nothing.
2001-10-21 06:23:14 PM  
20 pounds an hour? FAWK. 'tell you what. I'll do it for 20 dollars an hour. Canadian.

That's more than farking TWICE what I get for Guard-work.

2001-10-21 06:52:16 PM  
In Mexico, you can pay people to mourn for your dead relatives at the funeral.
2001-10-21 07:10:00 PM  
That's not stupid. I want a person to stand in line for me! I couldn't do that for someone else though... I am very impatient.
Kat [TotalFark]
2001-10-21 08:18:44 PM  
i think im gonna to make a living out of this, ill get a little electric wheel chair, so i dont even have to stand, and a good portable cd player and ill be set, this is perfect!

where are there HUGE lines?
2001-10-21 08:25:10 PM  
There's a guy here in my town who hires people for minimum wage to stand in line for tickets to concerts and other events. He gets the tickets and resells them at whatever the market will bear.
2001-10-21 08:26:29 PM  
If this was an American article, use of the word 'tramp' instead of 'homeless person', would have all of us pc bastards up in arms...America is kinda stupid like that...
2001-10-21 08:51:06 PM  
Screw this, I'm going to start my own queuing organization staffed by bouncers. For 40 pounds an hour we'll kick your queuer's a$$ and guarantee first place in line.
2001-10-21 09:38:47 PM  
Why not just get ASA to kill everyone else in line? It's probably cheaper that way too.
(sorry i know for a boobies this is quite morbid)
2001-10-21 09:38:49 PM  
What the F does 'queue' mean?
2001-10-21 09:50:12 PM  
Queue is english for line :)
2001-10-21 09:54:57 PM  
Oh and Kat - that's hilarious. My friend and I were trying to come up with a really lazy chair one day (it would be really comfy! and have wheels! and you could pushiat using two plungers!) and about 10 minutes passed before we realized we were inventing the wheelchair.
2001-10-21 09:58:05 PM  
thanks ;)
2001-10-21 10:00:34 PM  
No problem :) do you think there's a market for english-to-english translation?
2001-10-21 10:10:25 PM  
As many have said, this is pretty old. Back when I lived in the Philippines, the US Embassy visa queue was at least 4 blocks long and really slow. All you had to do was hire some dude for 2 or 3 dollars to stand in the line for you really early in the morning.
2001-10-21 10:20:08 PM  
is it "Kyoo" or "kay". i say "kyoo" my friend calls me stupid and says its "kay".
2001-10-21 10:47:16 PM  
Sounds like a great job for all of those unemployed Web Designers and System Admins
2001-10-21 11:36:45 PM  
its kyoo
2001-10-22 12:26:44 AM  
Or just q, like how the letter is pronounced. Or like a pool cue.
2001-10-22 01:21:24 AM  
Wraith: If your friend pronounces Q as "kay", then how does he pronounce K? "Zed"?

In a programming class I had to take a few years back, the instructor was explaining the concept of stacks and queues. He was using all sorts of metaphors EXCEPT for the metaphors represented by the terms themselves. I finally had to pipe up with, "So what you're saying is, a queue is like a queue and a stack is like a stack?" :)
2001-10-22 01:35:17 AM  
I think all the confusion here is because Americans don't understand what it means to queue.

Queue (k'yu) - to wait in line in an orderly manner, with consideration for the value of time and feelings of others who arrived at a specific place before you. (Not applicable in New York.)
2001-10-22 01:44:33 AM  
I see that no one is bothered by the fact that there are lines (i.e. queues) that are so long that they necesitate a line-stander. It bothers me that people think lines are something to be accepted. Instead, lines should be a thing of the past, like any outdated and arcane system.

If people start refusing to stand in long lines, then services that require a line will come up with innovative ways to do away with them. Amusement parks are finally starting to feel the pinch, and trying to come up with innovative ways to solve the line problem (except that their ideas are sucking so far). It's the beauty of capitalism, where you vote with your money (and presence in this case).
2001-10-22 01:58:45 AM  
Kaiwuzheer- do you have a suggestion for shorter lines? I don't know exactly how you plan to reduce a line at an amusement park without adding additional rides - although that itself will encourage more visitors and hence... more lines.
2001-10-22 02:38:27 AM  
Maybe at the entrance of the lines there should be an employee who submits items of interests to the customer.
Father- Playboy Mag.
Mother- National Enquirer
Kid(Boy)-Pokemon hand-held game
Kid(Girl)- tea pots and dolls

When they reach the end of their line, they must place the designated item back in its appropriate bin.

This might be a temporary solution however i believe that many dads will be charged with theft of amusement property.
2001-10-22 03:11:32 AM  
Great idea! Sadly, I don't think amusement park operators are cool enough for that. Here in the USA, they are starting to issue, what one park calls, "fast-trak" passes. Basically, you buy a ticket for a ride at a specific time. Because they sell a limited amount of tickets for a specific time slot, people can schedule the rest of their day around their scheduled rides, and then get onto the ride almost instantly. What's the catch? Well, they suck because you have to pay more. In the instance of Disney World, in Florida, if you by tickets for all the theme parks, then you get the fast pass option for "free".

I'm not saying I have a great idea, I'm just being lazy and complaining that lines suck and I'm going to support services that don't have lines and let them come up with solutions.
2001-10-22 03:26:45 AM  
When an Englishman is on his own, he will form an orderly queue of one.
2001-10-22 03:32:31 AM  
They really charge for Fast-Track passes at Disney World? At Disney Land in California, the fast track passes were free. Splash Mountain had a 1 hr wait so we got a fast track pass for 6 pm, and it was still a 15 minute wait in the fast track line. Disney World sucks if they actually charge for the Fast-Track Passes. Of course the last time I went was a year ago so it might have changed since then.
2001-10-22 06:20:20 AM  
And They say We're too violent? They're too lazy. I gess the economy of Europe isn't that bad if people in Great Britian can get people to stand in line for money.

Euros are cool....

x---X--The Filthy Sanchez--X---x
2001-10-22 06:22:12 AM  
In World War II, The British said that American Soldiers were "Overpaid, Oversexed and Over Here".... American Soldiers replied that the British were "Underpaid, Undersexed and Under Eisenhower".....

x---X--The Filthy Sanchez--X---x
2001-10-22 06:28:34 AM  
Don't like to queue in the US, eh? Last week I spent an hour and a half standing in what looked very much like a queue (line, kay, or whatever you wish to call it) in SeaTac Airport.... and then in Charlotte airport... and then in Philadelphia Airport...
2001-10-22 06:30:28 AM  
Filthy... you forgot "overweight"...

heh heh heh....
2001-10-22 08:25:55 AM  
I paid $15 for someone to stand in line at the Department of Motor Vehicles (Boston) to get me my license plates, and submit all my forms from my insurance agency.

This works on two levels: I don't have to stand in line to deal with the cranky farks who work there, and the cranky farks are less cranky with the guy who comes in, because they know he's a trained eye who will give them exactly what they need as they expect it, and that every form set he gives them is one less person standing in That Line Over There.

Everyone wins, in that case. It's sort of the way lawyers work (in theory). Now, the problem is, if like lawyers, the DMV DEMANDS that you use one of these "runners". Suddenly I'll be paying a $75 "runner fee" for each transaction.
2001-10-22 08:37:01 AM  
What is the whole deal with Americans calling it "Standing in line"? You'd think that with the obsession for acronyms and soundbites that they would have immediately adopted the word along with the rest of the language (however badly spelt).
2001-10-22 08:45:21 AM  
you mean SIL or SIQ?
2001-10-22 08:47:13 AM  
2001-10-22 09:15:41 AM  
this makes me seriously consider why i am only being paid £4 an hour to be a waitress.... when i could be paid £20 an hour to...stand
2001-10-22 09:33:53 AM  
I paid a guy to go to traffic court for me once.. he appeared in front of the judge and got my ticket dismissed.. the funny thing was he wasn't a lawyer or anything just a friend of mine and the judge didn't really care whether it was me or not.
2001-10-22 09:52:05 AM  
What happens when the guy hired to stand in line actually GETS to the front of the line?

Clerk:"May I help you?"
Guy:"Uhhhhh, I was just hired to stand here."
Clerk:"That's nice...back of the line for you and don't waste my time."

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