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(Forbes.com)   The average screening of Gigli was attended by ten moviegoers. Gobble, gobble   ( forbes.com) divider line
    More: PSA  
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14419 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Aug 2003 at 2:59 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-08-04 12:42:18 PM  
What the article fails to report is that it was the same 10 moviegoers in each show.

The same ten people in the US that actually give a fat rat's ass about the hype surrounding Ben Affleck and
Jennifer Lopez's relationship.
2003-08-04 12:50:32 PM  
I want to hear from some people who actually saw it. I'm betting I'll find some on here.

Is there a context that makes the whole "It's turkey time. Gobble, gobble" thing even remotely not horrible?
2003-08-04 12:51:35 PM  
It really is surprising that all the negative press didn't ignite curiosity...maybe it still will.
2003-08-04 12:52:55 PM  
The context is cunninlingus.
2003-08-04 12:54:05 PM  
cunning linguist...

2003-08-04 12:58:15 PM  
[image from southparkstudios.com too old to be available]
2003-08-04 01:05:51 PM  
Why didn't they shoot this thing at birth? Or J. Lo? Or Affleck?

/taco keeses
2003-08-04 01:08:31 PM  
[image from thadweb.com too old to be available]

The only Affleck falls in love with a Lesbian that is worth a crap.

Actually, this is one of the best written movies I have ever seen.
2003-08-04 01:12:52 PM  
Man, that movie looks farking horrible. And that turkey line......that has to be the worst movie line ever!
2003-08-04 01:23:50 PM  
When I read that Forbes article, I just loffed and loffed and loffed and loffed and loffed.
2003-08-04 01:25:13 PM  
The statement is flawed. He's making guesses at ticket prices and how many screens it's on. For all we know, the average could be as high as 15 people per screening!
2003-08-04 01:29:18 PM  
"I am giving Gigli one star and that is only because of Walken: if Brest were smart, when the film hits DVD, he should only release that scene and stick the rest in the deleted scenes section."
-- Peter Sobczynski,
2003-08-04 01:30:28 PM  
Of those 10 people, 8 walked out after the first 30 minutes.
2003-08-04 01:32:26 PM  
Im willing to bet half these reviews are critics just trying to outwit eachother.

Im sure this movie is not as bad as "xXx". And that did not get the gang bang this one is.

Or maybe it is.
2003-08-04 01:34:14 PM  
The only people seeing this movie are those that worship J-Lo, and the masochists that want to see just how bad it really is.
2003-08-04 01:43:26 PM  
Holy cats, but this sucked hard. Personally, I didn't care that much for the Walken walk-on, but it wasn't horrible. Al Pacino was great as a mafioso, as always. The rest? Dreck, at best. Ugly, ugly cr@p.
2003-08-04 01:45:59 PM  
So why is her character a lesbian again?

Is it to position her sexual interest in men at the far end of the spectrum therefor amplifiying the rabid testesosterone God that is Ben Afleck that causes her to whiplash into heterosexuality?...

Or just a bad script in need of any and all obscure elements.
2003-08-04 01:51:01 PM  
Gigli is #2 on the list of Worst 100 movies EVER on IMDB.
2003-08-04 01:53:56 PM  

Whats number 1?

/too lazy to look it up myself
2003-08-04 02:14:51 PM  
Spanky22: Here's their bottom 10:

1 From Justin to Kelly (2003)
2 Gigli (2003)
3 Manos, the Hands of Fate (1966)
4 Troll 2 (1990)
5 Space Mutiny (1988)
6 Future War (1995)
7 Eegah (1962)
8 Hobgoblins (1987)
9 Backyard Dogs (2000)
10 Santa with Muscles (1996)
2003-08-04 02:19:45 PM  
LandoGriffin: Ahh, gracias senior. I am happy to say that I havent seen any of those horrible, horrible movies.
2003-08-04 02:24:42 PM  
Wow no Madonna movie made the bottom ten?
2003-08-04 02:27:00 PM  
It is hard for me to imagine anything worse than "Manos, Hands of Fate" or "Eegah" (saw them on mst3k). At least J-Lo is pleasant to look at!
2003-08-04 02:55:32 PM  
Wow, Santa with Muscles. I've never even heard of it, but of the 10 worst films it's the only one with a title that screams, "I'm a horrible, horrible film. Even MST3K will have a hard time making me watchable."
2003-08-04 03:04:22 PM  
2003-08-04 02:24:42 PM nakedmolerat
Wow no Madonna movie made the bottom ten?

The IMDb lists aren't very accurate. They skew heavily based on how many people have seen a movie. Their Top 250 of all time has far too many recent and popular movies in it. Same with the Bottom 10--just look at the list. Also, 2, 5, and 7 on the list were on MST3k.
2003-08-04 03:05:22 PM  
Of the 10, 8 died from exposure to the film in the first 20 minutes the only two survivors were a blind and deaf boy, and a man who chewed his own leg off in order to escape the theater.

Even the commercials let on that this movie was going to be unspeakable awful. I'd sooner teabag a pirhanna tank than sit through 90 minutes of that tripe.
2003-08-04 03:05:35 PM  
I work at a movie theatre, and gigli made a measly $165 dollars on saturday and $105 on sunday as opposed to seabiscuit which made $3,065 on saturday and $1,032 on sunday.
2003-08-04 03:06:22 PM  
Also 8... perhaps even 6.
2003-08-04 03:06:30 PM  
mick e's favorite take on the jHo, Been Awfleck vehicle comes from the wonderful folks at the onion
2003-08-04 03:06:36 PM  
2003-08-04 12:54:05 PM Sinatra
cunning linguist...

oh -- is THAT why i always get teased about my nick ?
2003-08-04 03:06:38 PM  
How can a movie where Jay-Lo is a lesbian be bad? Every other part must REALLY suck
2003-08-04 03:06:52 PM  
I'm hearing that Gigli was SUPPOSED to bomb at the box office. Something about a movie studio needing to take a loss, etc.

Sure seems like its working.
2003-08-04 03:07:16 PM  
Actually, I was thinking this movie might make good fodder for MST3K. Steevaroni, what do you think? Unfortunately I don't drink or smoke crack so my only hope of enjoying a flop like this is to go with a big group of friends who will make fun of it. Would that work?
2003-08-04 03:07:28 PM  
Holy crap! Not one, but TWO movies beat Manos for the worst movie of all time.

I repeat: Holy. Crap.
2003-08-04 03:08:07 PM  
and also in the news ten moviegoers left the movie saying "Why did I put myself through that brain torture"
2003-08-04 03:08:15 PM  
"From Justin To Kelly" may well be the worst movie of all time, but the only reason it is ranked as such at the IMDB is due to a huge internet protest. Most of the people who voted for it haven't seen it and only voted because they were instructed to do so on a message board to "send a message" to the MPAA.

As I said before, I'm not denying it may be the worst film ever, though.
2003-08-04 03:08:22 PM  
The movie Gigli was so bad, it gave me cancer !


2003-08-04 03:08:24 PM  
Elwood: Wow, Gigli was on MST3K already?!
2003-08-04 03:09:52 PM  
i dont ave anything against Affleck (hell, im a Boston kid myself.. and my favorite move of all time is Good Will Hunting).. but the reported and substantiated negative press that surrounds J-Lo concerning her temper, her biatchiness, her 'must have it my way', combined with her over saturation in every market has me sick to my tummy tum tum with her. im SOFA KING happy she got bombed on with this movie.
3.8 million dollars on the opening reported by CNN the other night on the ticker. my wife and i actually laughed out loud at that.
ahahah put her ass in check.
2003-08-04 03:11:12 PM  
I almost went to go see it BECAUSE it was supposed to be so bad. Sometimes really bad is good, just ask any MST3K or Plan 9 fan...
2003-08-04 03:11:41 PM  
I consider myself a fan of the horrible, and thats why i have subjected myself to such films as Ax Em' and the Worst Witch, but even this movie is beyond my incalculable threshold of movie pain. I would rather douse my eyes in honey and stick my head into a fire ant colony than watch this dross.

P.S.: I saw Jason X on opening day.
2003-08-04 03:12:40 PM  
Okay, some things I don't get about J-Lo: first, what's the fascination with this woman's ass? Sorry guys, but it isn't THAT nice. I've found asses 10 times better on amateur porn sites. And is it just me, or is she one of the most overrated "talents" of the last 20 years? Her movies make me want to vomit - "The Wedding Planner" was so smarmingly wretched that I now have to question Matthew McConohey's (sp?) manhood.

J-Lo is nobody. People need to get over her.
2003-08-04 03:12:48 PM  
If a movie sticks... can we still get refunds at the theater? is that still possible?
2003-08-04 03:12:49 PM  
That's just stupid, how can Walken be in something worse than "Manos" --

I think the IMDB editors need to take care of some things there. I'm willing to bet most who voted on Gigli haven't even seen it.
2003-08-04 03:12:50 PM  
I would see Glitter before Giggley. But I think I would see Giggley before Crossroads but I am not sure.
2003-08-04 03:12:51 PM  
Those guys at IMDB don't know what they're talking about. Troll 2 is a masterpiece.

"Nilbog! It's goblin spelled backwards!"
2003-08-04 03:13:27 PM  
I'd sooner teabag a pirhanna tank than sit through 90 minutes of that tripe.

You, sir, are a true poet. Hats off.

Anyhoo, I can't believe that Battlefield Earth wasn't on the IMDB bottom 10.
2003-08-04 03:14:41 PM  
[image from aflnyc.com too old to be available]
2003-08-04 03:14:56 PM  
for five lettered movies with affleck, nothing stacks up like this one...

[image from boo.riga.lv too old to be available]
2003-08-04 03:15:07 PM  
ElCorridor: I want to hear from some people who actually saw it. I'm betting I'll find some on here.

Is there a context that makes the whole "It's turkey time. Gobble, gobble" thing even remotely not horrible?

How about a "flash mob" that goes to the movie, waits until the aforementioned line, makes loud gobbling sounds for sixty seconds, and then leaves en masse?

/just an idea
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