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(SNPP)   What is the funniest moment/quote from The Simpsons? Voting enabled   ( snpp.com) divider line
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13523 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jul 2003 at 2:05 PM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2003-07-19 08:56:36 PM  
Crazy Vaclav:"This car will go 12 hectares on a single tank of keroscene."

Homer:"What country is this car from?"

Crazy Vaclav:" It no longer exists. Put it in H."
2003-07-19 08:58:05 PM  
Homer: "Take that, Lisas beliefs!"
2003-07-19 08:59:42 PM  
Lenny: It's bringing peace! Don't let it get away!
Carl: Break its legs!

(Homer envisions his funeral-Heckle and Jeckle are there)
Heckle: There goes a real sack of crap.
Jeckle: Indubitubly, old chum.

(From a Treehouse of Horror episode)
Moe: Time to get me some caveman hookers!

Comic Book Guy: No banging your head on the display case, please. It contains a very rare Mary Worth in which she advises a friend to commit suicide. Thank you.
2003-07-19 09:11:03 PM  
In the episode where the town is divided by the new area code. Old Springfield cuts off the river water from New Springfield. The New Springfieldians find a lot gold in the river bed.

Kent Brockman: (on TV with gold jewlery everywhere) and thanks to old Springfield, it looks like we'll all be taking golden showers.

The que card guys snicker in the background.
2003-07-19 09:13:19 PM  
Quimby: Can't we have just one meeting that doesn't end with us digging up a corpse?

BTW, the Hypnotoad was from Futurama, not The Simpsons.
2003-07-19 09:14:31 PM  
A noble spirit embiggens the smallest man
2003-07-19 09:21:55 PM  
"SANCTUARY" -homer-
2003-07-19 09:23:53 PM  
"I can call my Maw from here...Hey Maw!!!" -Cletus-
2003-07-19 09:27:00 PM  
Homer to Lisa "Oh honey, it does'nt mean anything....like ramalamadingdong or give peace a chance."
2003-07-19 09:28:21 PM  
Bart daydreaming: "I wash myself with a rag-on-a-stick"
2003-07-19 09:30:31 PM  
From the Lord of the Flies parody episode:

"I'm so hungry I could eat at Arby's."
2003-07-19 09:33:44 PM  
"Look Marge, Maggie lost her baby legs!"
2003-07-19 09:38:54 PM  
Mr Burns: "Smithers had thwarted my earlier attempt to take candy from a baby. But with him out of the picture, I was free to wallow in my own crapulence."
2003-07-19 09:40:56 PM  
Mr. Burns: With Smithers out of the way I was free to wallow in my own crapulence.

who shot Mr Burns pt2

I was shocked as hell that crapulence is actually a word :)
2003-07-19 09:41:50 PM  
"I love you Pepsi"

"My name's Pepi"

2003-07-19 09:43:18 PM  
Homer: "I think I brained my damage".
2003-07-19 09:45:21 PM  
mmmmm..... forbidden sandwich!
2003-07-19 09:50:23 PM  
If these have been done, please forgive me:

From "Worst Episode Ever":
Why don't you have a friend run the store for a while?...You DO have friends, right?
I have Super Friends...
What about friends that arn't on paper?
You mean like action figures?

From the ep where Lisa goes to college:

..a basho banana tree


"I MAKE YOU STAR. I AM LUGASH"-sign from Lugash's gymnastic school

Here are cats back!
I had a dog...
He is cat now!

And finally, from the ep where Bart steals around Christmas:
2003-07-19 09:50:31 PM  
"Father! Give me legs!" robot in the garage, crawling on two arms.
"Why you!" Homer throws robot into street.
"Father NO!!!-" from the middle of the street.
Homer silences him with a cold stare and a pointed finger, and the creature crawls away, still without legs.

Either that or any episode with skin eating zombies. Those are cool.
2003-07-19 09:52:02 PM  
"Father! Give me legs!" robot in the garage, crawling on two arms.
"Why you!" Homer throws robot into street.
"Father NO!!!-" from the middle of the street.
Homer silences him with a cold stare and a pointed finger, and the creature crawls away, still without legs.

Either that or any episode with skin eating zombies. Those are cool.

now with voting in sector 8
2003-07-19 09:55:12 PM  
Homer: There is a right way, A wrong way, And the Max Power way.

Bart: Isn't the Max Power way the same as the wrong way.

Homer: But Faster.
/ Not that voting matters for late entries
2003-07-19 09:57:08 PM  
Homer, Homer Simpson,
he's the greatest man in history,
from the, town of Springfield
He's about to hit a chestnut tree
2003-07-19 09:59:07 PM  
Maude - "They were having S-E-X in front of the C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N!"

Jay Sherman - "How can you vote for Burns' movie?"
Krusty - "Let's just say it moved me. TO A BIGGER HOUSE!"

Lisa - "Milhouse, I think I have a crush on someone."
Milhouse - "OH REALLY? I mean... [cool] oh really?"
2003-07-19 09:59:08 PM  
I haven't seen this one yet so...

When teaching Apu Nahassapeemapetalon (or something like that) info for his citizenship exams and he knows everything correctly but Homer has his slightly off-kilter version:

Homer: "No, no, no. We'll have to start all over with the Electrical College."
2003-07-19 10:05:10 PM  
1)After Homer baby proofs Apu's apartment by putting foam fingers on each of Shiva's arms:

(paraphrased) "Oh thank you Mr Homer. There will be no more diety related pokings"

2) The "fast forward" episode where Lisa imagines being married to Ralph "Get Mommy's prying stick"

3) "Dancing away my hunger pains... moving my feet so my stomach won't hurt" (Hungry Hungry Homer)

4) Cletus: "Hey look - it's that little girl what turns squiggles into words"
2003-07-19 10:07:50 PM  
Nelson,as he hits Bart with a snowball:
"thanks a lot,plowboy!"
2003-07-19 10:09:30 PM  
/homer singing

"When I was 17, I drank some very good beer, I drank some very good beer I purchased with a fake ID, my name was Brian McGee, we stayed up listning to Queen, when I waaas 17."

2003-07-19 10:13:17 PM  
Bill Cosby: Hey kids, meet Grandpa Murphy!

Grandaughter: but we have 3 grandpas already.

Cosby: But this one is the great jazz musician

Grandaugher: Ahh, they all are!

Cosby: Ohh ohh, ya see, the kids they listen to the rap music which gives them the brain damage, with the hippin' and the hoppin' and the bippin' and the boppin', so they dont know what jazz...is all about! AYa see, jazz is like a Jell-O pudding pop, no! its more like Kodak film,no! Actually its more like the new coke, itll be around forever, heh heh heh.
2003-07-19 10:15:24 PM  
Bart: " I didn't believe it was possible, but this both sucks and blows at the same time"
2003-07-19 10:25:26 PM  
Chief Wiggam: Put out an APB for Uosdwis r Lemoh
Lou: Uh... I think that's Homer J. Simpson
Wiggam: Good detective work Lou

Favorite Simpsons song:
Can you name the truck with four-wheel drive,
Smells like a steak, and seats thirty-five?
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Well, it goes real slow with the hammer down.
Its the country-fried truck endorsed by a clown.
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Twelve yards long, two lanes wide,
sixty-five tones of American pride!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
Top of the line In utility sports,
Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts!
Canyonero! Canyonero!
She blinds everyone with her super high-beams.
Shes a squirrel-squashin, Dear-smackin Drivin
Canyonero! Canyonero! Canyonero!
Whoa, Canyonero! Canyonero!
(From 5F10, "The last temptation of Krust")
2003-07-19 10:41:07 PM  
What's that magic floating head, you want me to shoot everyone?

Nah I'm just kidding, it's a miracle

Chief Wiggam
2003-07-19 10:53:27 PM  
Homer (referring to the goldfish in Disco Stu's platform shoes): Hey, your fish are dead.
Disco Stu: Yeah, I know, I can't get them out of there.
2003-07-19 10:54:16 PM  
Mr Burns: Ehhhhhhhhhxcellent. (while twiddling fingers)

/can't believe no one went there.
2003-07-19 10:54:59 PM  
Bart: It's a beautiful day. The sun is shining, birds are singing, bees are trying to have sex with them...as is my understanding
2003-07-19 10:55:11 PM  
Homer: mmm', 64 slices of american cheese. 1..2...3...4
...6 hours later
Homer: 63...64
Marge: Homey, did you stay up all night eating cheese?
Homer: yes, I think I'm blind. [faints and hits table]
[Smithers and Burns fall from the ceiling]
Mr. Burns: good day to you [walks out]
2003-07-19 10:59:41 PM  

OMG....the Canyonero song--makes me pee a little every time I hear it :-P

64 tons of American pride!
2003-07-19 11:00:56 PM  
Kent Brockman wins the lottery:

Homer: "He may have a alot of money, but there's some things he CAN'T buy."
Marge: "Like what?"
Homer: "........a DINOSAUR."
2003-07-19 11:02:52 PM  

"I'll no longer be Homer J. Simpson. From now on, I'll be known as [reveals his full name] Homer JAY Simpson."
2003-07-19 11:04:02 PM  
Homer: Chop chop, dig dig, chop chop, dig dig
Marge: You know Homie, there's so much more two wives can do for you...
Homer: I hear digging, but I don't hear chopping!


Troy: "My good looks paid for that pool, and my talent filled it with water!"
2003-07-19 11:04:06 PM  
Apu to Homer: What do you say we take a relaxed attitude towards work and watch the baseball game? The "NY" Mets are my favorite squadron.
2003-07-19 11:13:35 PM  
I haven't seen this one yet. Very few of you will probably recognize it. It has been removed from the syndicated episode. It was the episode where Krusty had his tax problem and the government was auctioning off all of his stuff.

Auctioneer: And the next item up for bids is 100 boxes of pornogrophy.
Jasper: I bid 10 cents.
Mystery Bidder: 20 cents
Jasper: All I brought was a dime, I didn't know there'd be pornography.
2003-07-19 11:17:51 PM  
Gentle Ben, the large bear talkshow host who goes mad and falls on his audience.
2003-07-19 11:24:58 PM  
The Grinch: you think you have won,
you think all is well,
well kiss my green ass,
and i'll see you in hell!

oh wait
thats family guy

a vote for me is a vote for family guy and not simpsons!
2003-07-19 11:31:39 PM  
Hello? Is this... [reads his paper] GBM? Uh, yeah. I read in the
personals that you were seeking a soulmate. Well, I also like rainy
days and movies. Uh-huh... [apprehensively] Uh, no, I don't like
that... Or that... No, it's not that I'm afraid. [very quickly] I'm
going to hang up now, bye-bye.
2003-07-19 11:34:05 PM  
Skinner: The year was 1968. We were on recon in a steaming Mekong delta. An overheated private removed his flak jacket, revealing a T-shirt with an iron-on sporting the Mad slogan "Up With Mini-Skirts". Well, we all had a good laugh, even though I didn't quite understand it. But our momentary lapse of concentration allowed Charlie to get the drop on us. I spent the next three years in a POW camp, forced to subsist on a thin stew made of fish, vegetables, prawns, coconut milk, and four kinds of rice. I came close to madness trying to find it here in the States, but they just can't get the spices right.
2003-07-19 11:43:21 PM  
In "Duffless," in which Homer agrees to go one month without his precious beer:

"I never realized how boring this game is," remarks a sober Homer during a baseball game.
2003-07-19 11:44:02 PM  
Homers postcard to Marge showing a sexy young blonde in a bikini with the writing 'WISH YOU WERE HER'
2003-07-19 11:46:46 PM  
The lemon tree episode is one of the best, with the Shelbyville counterparts of all of Springfield. When Flanders pulls up and asks some locals if they've seen the kids, and they say:

"Sounds like Springfield has a discipline problem!"

"Yeah, that's why we beat them at football almost half the time!"

That's priceless...
2003-07-19 11:53:13 PM  
Tooo many, but where else would you hear...

"You fool! Now we'll never know if ants can be trained to sort tiny screws in space..." (nor easy to say)

"Ok Buzz, if that IS your real name..."
2003-07-19 11:54:42 PM  
while watching tv game show:

Host on tv: The capital of North Dakota is named after what German ruler?
Homer: Hitler!
Marge: Hitler, North Dakota?
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