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Quilling sprees, flaming dog testicles, and the French retweet. Some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 9/5 - 9/11
Posted by Drew at 2010-09-14 1:31:15 PM (15 comments) | Permalink
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3834 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Sep 2010 at 2:00 PM (7 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



No update from Drew this week, so check to see if your favorite headlines from last week made the list.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2010-09-05 to Sat 2010-09-11:

   Rugby players who survived a plane crash in the Andes and inspired the movie "Alive" have arrived in Chile to offer the trapped miners support, recipes    
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   Seriously slow day over at CBS: Popping pimples is bad for your face. It's not new zits Fark    
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  Two photographers fighting at a wedding. Bride wonders if someday her prints will come  

   Two-thirds of you Americans believe that one magical person out there, somewhere, is your soul mate. The rest of you already gave up and are married    
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   Woman stung 500 times by wasps, mostly by insulting her shoes, lack of Ivy League education    
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   British fail to understand the Tea Party. This is not a repeat from 1773    
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   Porcupines may lose their protection in Pennsylvania, prompting state residents to go on a quilling spree    
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   Sprinkler system blamed in fire. IT'S LIKE RAI-EEEEEEE-AIIIIIIIIIIIN    
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   Russian airline pilot makes an amazing crash landing after getting his Bering Strait    
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   High school students create group to fight peer pressure. You should join. Come on, everyone's doing it. It'll make you feel good. What are you, chicken?    
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   Woman's lost pinky grows back. Are you pondering what I'm pondering?    
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Sports:

   Former WWE wrestler Jim "The Anvil" Neidhart hit with drug charges, steel chair    
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   Michael Jordan and Wayne Gretzky gambled in Vegas, and MJ tried to tip a waitress with a $5 chip. Gretzky instead gave her one of MJ's $100 chips and said "that's how we tip, Michael." Wayne Gretzky is probably dead right now    
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   Clijsters tops Zvonareva. I think I have a cream for that    
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Geek:

   Scientists link bone strengthening drugs to throat cancer. That's going to be tough news to swallow    
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   Turns out the US Army has a Twitter feed. The French army has one too, but they only use it to retweet    
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   Scientists are close to finishing mapping the complete turkey genome sequence. They would have finished it earlier but they suddenly got really tired, unbuttoned their pants and took a nap while watching football    
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Showbiz:

   Paris Hilton's vagina has more Coke in it than an Atlanta vending machine    
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   Terry Gilliam's Don Quixote project is stalled yet again. If only there were a metaphor involving the futility of the project involving windmills that could be used    
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   David Carradine's ex-wife believes his spirit is "trying to cross over" and lead her to the truth behind his death. She sounds as if she's still choked with grief    
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Politics:

   Ex-UK military chief says Blair underfunded army. Goes on to say Natalie's strategy was flawed, Tootie underutilized the Navy, and Ms. Garrett was a mole    
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   Furious protesters in Muslim nations believe that the few nuts who are going to burn Qurans represent all of American culture. Fortunately, we in the United States would never stigmatize an entire culture based on the actions of a radical few  

   Obama goes without his wedding ring at press conference; sources say Rahm took it back to Mount Doom for some touch-up work    
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Music:

   Taylor Momsen makes her play to be considered a real rock and roll star by setting her dog's testicles on fire    
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   50 Cent wants to collaborate with Kanye West. Sadly, this collaboration wouldn't take place in the Thunderdome    
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   Iron & Wine announce new album, tour dates; insomniacs everywhere rejoice    
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Business:

   Amazon suggests manufacturers start making packaging easier to open, because apparently people get angry when this DAMNED CLAMSHELL COULDN'T BE CUT WITH A FARKING LIGHTSABER    
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   IN A WORLD where pre-movie commercials run too long, ONE WOMAN will decide that it's TIME to take ACTION. "Last Action Lawsuit" - this time, IT'S PERSONAL    
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   Starbucks shortens menu by removing 'tall." Now instead of kind of expensive, really expensive and horribly expensive your only options are really expensive and horribly expensive    
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· · ·

15 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
2010-09-14 01:38:09 PM  
Paris Hilton's vagina has more Coke in it than an Atlanta vending machine

I am still laughing, subby. Bravo.
 
2010-09-14 01:51:56 PM  
Retweet.

/Awesome.
//+1
 
2010-09-14 02:07:57 PM  
Can someone please get this gigantic grinning fat fark the fark off my monitor now, please?
 
2010-09-14 02:11:52 PM  

boobsrgood: Can someone please get this gigantic grinning fat fark the fark off my monitor now, please?


Dude, what?
 
2010-09-14 02:15:59 PM  
Holy crap, that pinky and the brain thread has the coolest link I've seen all day.
 
2010-09-14 02:16:53 PM  
Rugby players who survived a plane crash in the Andes and inspired the movie "Alive" have arrived in Chile to offer the trapped miners support, recipes

/takes bow
 
2010-09-14 03:03:18 PM  
Throw out your hands, stick out your tush, hands on your hips, give a little push...Don't be surprised, your doing the French Retweet:

[image from i681.photobucket.com too old to be available]

Voila!
 
2010-09-14 03:26:41 PM  
Paris Hilton's vagina has more Coke in it than an Atlanta vending machine

First time I've wanted the t-shirt. I'll vote this for showbiz headline of the year.
 
2010-09-14 03:39:31 PM  
Am I missing the flaming dog testicles thread, cuz I'm not seeing it.
 
2010-09-14 03:52:36 PM  

zabadu: Am I missing the flaming dog testicles thread, cuz I'm not seeing it.


First one in the music section.
 
2010-09-14 04:21:58 PM  
I'm going to hell yet again for laughing so hard at the David Carradine thread.
 
2010-09-14 05:18:31 PM  
I's been robbed, robbed I's tell you!!!

Katherine Schwarzenegger is writing a book, tentatively titled "Who is My Daddy, and What Does He Do"
 
2010-09-14 06:42:22 PM  

spidermann: I's been robbed, robbed I's tell you!!!

Katherine Schwarzenegger is writing a book, tentatively titled "Who is My Daddy, and What Does He Do"


*Slow clap.* Niiiiiiiiice. :D
 
2010-09-15 08:50:14 AM  
I hate it when I've actually been working, not Farking, and by the time I see a headline here it's too late to tell Subby I love it. So ...

Subby, I LOVED the French retweet.

/sigh, that feels better
 
2010-09-15 10:39:23 AM  
I hear you scamp-dun-emer :) Very generous of you.

/Like I wasn't hanging around this thread hoping to hear praise anyway
 
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