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(BBC)   Problem: Budget cutbacks leave too few guards to man prison gun towers. Solution: put a guard hat on a soccer ball and stick in the tower, the prisoners will never know the difference   (bbc.co.uk) divider line
59
    More: Fail, lack of resources, National Guard  
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9072 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jul 2010 at 7:57 AM (10 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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ArkAngel [TotalFark]
2010-07-21 1:08:01 AM  
Now they do
 
ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha [TotalFark] [BareFark] [OhFark]
2010-07-21 1:42:57 AM  
static5.matrixsports.comView Full Size
 
ignite ice
2010-07-21 3:34:21 AM  
Solution: thirty foot tall, five feet thick cement walls with upward-pointed spikes on the sides. And all the spikes have high voltage running through them.

Mmm...
 
Galwran
2010-07-21 3:58:57 AM  
Looks like they have read too much Foucault.
 
Galwran
2010-07-21 4:05:41 AM  

Galwran: Looks like they have read too much Foucault.


Make that Benthan.
 
Sun God
2010-07-21 4:28:16 AM  
I thought Andrew Lloyd Webber was in charge of Argentine prisons.
 
log_jammin
2010-07-21 6:06:38 AM  
A Scarecrip?
 
Alphax [TotalFark]
2010-07-21 6:18:29 AM  
There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

A: None. All it takes is a press release.
 
Sun God
2010-07-21 6:46:27 AM  

Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?


All of them.
 
Alphax [TotalFark]
2010-07-21 7:06:54 AM  

Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.


No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.
 
UNC_Samurai [TotalFark]
2010-07-21 7:18:41 AM  

Alphax: Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

A: None. All it takes is a press release.

sign. Preferably one with a little blood spatter.
 
Sun God
2010-07-21 7:20:42 AM  

Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.


There is a bomb in your car. And one in your kid's school. Your latte is poisoned with anthrax. Your next door neighbor is entirely innocent of any and all crimes, but his friend actively collects bags of fertilizer.

Terrorism isn't about destruction. It's about creating terror. And if there are millions of land mines planted around your village, someone should do something about that. Instead of dismissing it as propaganda.
 
Sybarite
2010-07-21 7:41:06 AM  

Galwran: Galwran: Looks like they have read too much Foucault.

Make that Benthan.



Panoptiball?
 
sirgrim [TotalFark] [OhFark]
2010-07-21 7:59:33 AM  
You know who else enjoyed putting his balls in a hat?
 
Clete Orris
2010-07-21 8:00:02 AM  

Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?


One mangled child, exploited shamelessly.
 
pippi longstocking
2010-07-21 8:02:02 AM  
If you ask me they don't even need the two they have. It's a waste of resources. If you are the "what if" types then I ask you what if they escape by tunneling? Or, what if they escape by hot air balloon À la Lex Luthor in Superman style? Oh you got me there, it's a stalemate.
 
cabritosaurio
2010-07-21 8:02:29 AM  

Clete Orris: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

One mangled child, exploited shamelessly.


I could have a midget by Friday...can we work with midgets?
 
Balchinian
2010-07-21 8:03:46 AM  
In all fairness, tower guards are not much more intelligent than soccer balls. Really the only giveaway would be the shape. Using a cinderblock instead of a soccerball would be a lot more convincing.
 
Clete Orris
2010-07-21 8:04:34 AM  

cabritosaurio: Clete Orris: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

One mangled child, exploited shamelessly.

I could have a midget by Friday...can we work with midgets?


I hate to shorten your deadline, but we need him by tomorrow.
 
taurusowner
2010-07-21 8:09:07 AM  

Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.


Yeah I wish everyone got that memo. Nothing like seeing the stack of painted rocks denoting a minefield AFTER you've walked a quarter of a mile across a field to check out a blown up T-72. Good times.
 
CasperImproved
2010-07-21 8:10:24 AM  
i849.photobucket.comView Full Size


Mr. Castaway approves.
 
Denial_of_Death
2010-07-21 8:18:49 AM  
i15.photobucket.comView Full Size
.
 
Barakku
2010-07-21 8:23:56 AM  
So they wanted it to look like they had a whooping 1/5 the gun tower guards they needed instead of the measly 2/15 guards?
 
beavens
2010-07-21 8:38:40 AM  
it really takes some balls to pull off a move like this.
 
iBette [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-07-21 8:38:41 AM  

UNC_Samurai: Alphax: Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

A: None. All it takes is a press release. sign. Preferably one with a little blood spatter.


tigersweat.comView Full Size


Approves.
 
Voiceofreason01
2010-07-21 8:44:41 AM  

Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.


and probably a sign maybe with a skull and crossbones on it
 
nytmare
2010-07-21 8:49:55 AM  

Voiceofreason01: Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.

and probably a sign maybe with a skull and crossbones on it


and sharp edges.
 
Flakeloaf
2010-07-21 8:56:47 AM  

Galwran: Looks like they have read too much Foucault.


Now the corrections spending pendulum has swung the other way.
 
Biner
2010-07-21 8:59:08 AM  

nytmare: Voiceofreason01: Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.

and probably a sign maybe with a skull and crossbones on it

and sharp edges.


And lasers. Lots of lasers, shooting in all directions.
 
Sybarite
2010-07-21 9:05:01 AM  

Biner: nytmare: Voiceofreason01: Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.

and probably a sign maybe with a skull and crossbones on it

and sharp edges.

And lasers. Lots of lasers, shooting in all directions.



I think I just got a semi.
 
palehorse864
2010-07-21 9:17:08 AM  

Galwran: Looks like they have read too much Foucault.


I was flashing back to my literary criticism class when I saw this article. Foucault was at least a lot easier to read than Derrida.
 
Leeds
2010-07-21 9:22:36 AM  
A soccer ball instead of a live guard?

img80.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
Spindle
2010-07-21 9:29:55 AM  
Tsk tsk, I was expecting to see a screenshot of Home Alone where Kevin made the burglars think there was a party going on by taping a silhouette to the train and was pulling ropes and whatnot. Someone get on that.
 
NTidd
2010-07-21 9:31:36 AM  
Another old riddle:

Q: How do you derail a thread and make a farker think?
A: Mines.
 
Daveman
2010-07-21 9:34:07 AM  
When my unit first arrived at Abu Ghraib, we found out that three of the towers that were on the perimeter of the prison were not --ever-- manned. Completely empty. At that time, our unit didn't have full control of the perimeter, as we would late in April of 2004, but it was well known that detainees were using the towers as ladders over the wall. We were even shown the spot at the top of one tower where they had thrown empty sandbags over the barbed wire.

As soon as we did get full control of the perimeter, we blew up one of the towers and manned the other two. First night that their favorite tower to use was manned? We captured 12 detainees trying to get out.

Didn't have another escape attempt (that I know of) the rest of the deployment, only base-wide alerts when the MPs farked up their counts.

/cool story, bro!
//preemptive slashy
 
angry_scientist
2010-07-21 9:35:44 AM  

NTidd: Another old riddle:

Q: How do you derail a thread and make a farker think?
A: Mines.


A mine is a terrible thing to waste
 
oribiasi
2010-07-21 9:38:51 AM  
deakin.edu.auView Full Size


Jeremy Bentham would NOT approve.

/nerd
 
cmb53208
2010-07-21 9:39:47 AM  
This sounds like a job for Dog the Bounty Hunter.
 
Leeds
2010-07-21 9:47:26 AM  

Daveman: As soon as we did get full control of the perimeter, we blew up one of the towers and manned the other two. First night that their favorite tower to use was manned? We captured 12 detainees trying to get out.


As a taxpaying citizen I certainly hope by "captured" you meant "killed."
 
Phideaux
2010-07-21 9:48:03 AM  

Sun God: There is a bomb in your car. And one in your kid's school. Your latte is poisoned with anthrax. Your next door neighbor is entirely innocent of any and all crimes, but his friend actively collects bags of fertilizer.


You ford the river.
 
clipperbox
2010-07-21 9:48:26 AM  

Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

A: None. All it takes is a press release.



reminds me of the old joke-

A farmer with a watermelon patch was growing frustrated because every once in a while, he'd get up in the morning and find that someone stole a watermelon. After a while, he came up with a plan, and put a sign out in the patch that read, "One of these watermelons has been poisoned!"
He went to bed proud of his witty deterrent. But then the next morning he got up to check the patch and found a second sign next his that read, "Now there are two."
 
The Homer Tax
2010-07-21 9:50:07 AM  
Well, let's be honest here. It's not like, for the vast majority of these inmates, they turned to a life a crime because their previous careers in Rocket Science weren't paying the bills.
 
zobear [TotalFark]
2010-07-21 9:50:44 AM  
The town of Twin Lakes, CO parks an older police cruiser, on the shoulder, at the town limits/speed limit sign. There's a log in the driver's seat.

Sometimes there's a hat on the log.
 
Bgnome
2010-07-21 9:53:24 AM  
Man, wilson is working as a prison guard? Hollywood can be crul sometimes
 
mybabysmomma
2010-07-21 9:58:28 AM  
They should dig a mote around and fill it with badgers.

BADGER, BADGER, BADGER
 
StrangeQ
2010-07-21 10:01:45 AM  

Sybarite: Biner: nytmare: Voiceofreason01: Alphax: Sun God: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

All of them.

No, you don't need any mines. Just a public announcement that there's mines in a certain area. No one with any sense of self preservation would test that out.

and probably a sign maybe with a skull and crossbones on it

and sharp edges.

And lasers. Lots of lasers, shooting in all directions.


I think I just got a semi.


You're not sure? I would think a semi parked in your lawn would be rather obvious...
blogs.bgsu.eduView Full Size
 
Mattyb710
2010-07-21 10:03:12 AM  
Why not just give half the inmates some guns and let them guard the other half? Every month they can play a game of twister, and the winning team gets to be the guards for the next month.
 
UHC2005
2010-07-21 10:04:45 AM  

cabritosaurio: Clete Orris: Alphax: There's an old riddle.

Q: How many mines does it take to make a minefield?

One mangled child, exploited shamelessly.

I could have a midget by Friday...can we work with midgets?


With nail polish?
 
Magorn [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-07-21 10:08:40 AM  

Galwran: Galwran: Looks like they have read too much Foucault.

Make that Benthan.


Panopticon FTW
 
freewill
2010-07-21 10:09:20 AM  
In New York State, some towns use inflatable police officers and leave them sitting in empty squad cars to get people to slow down, so I'm getting a kick...

s.wsj.netView Full Size


/ Hotlinked.
// I just want to tell you both good luck. We're all counting on you.
 
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