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(Sky.com)   Woman perishes in dishwasher accident. Damien sought for questioning   ( sky.com) divider line
    More: Strange  
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11689 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 May 2003 at 12:19 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-05-29 12:22:02 AM  
Damien being WHO?
2003-05-29 12:22:22 AM  
[image from horrorseek.com too old to be available]

this whole mastercard parody thing never gets old, y'know?
2003-05-29 12:23:13 AM  
comedy 2 seconds too late post


"The last time this happened we thought it was a freak accident but this case does show there is a danger from dishwashers."

Not really. I think the odds are in your favor that you wont get maimed by a dishwasher.
2003-05-29 12:26:02 AM  
Anything is dangerous, for the criminally stupid.
2003-05-29 12:28:44 AM  
If it's your time to go, God will find a way!!$#@@!!
2003-05-29 12:34:01 AM  
I can very well see this sort of accident happening a lot, but... WHY would you keep your knives pointing upwards?

this has NEVER made sense to me. pointing upwards, they're more difficult to take out. there's far more risk of injury.
2003-05-29 12:36:38 AM  
This is why I only use disposable utencils and plates. I also try to only eat out but some times you have to eat in, which is where the microwave comes into play.
2003-05-29 12:36:45 AM  
good point bobbette. Also, I usually close the dishwasher before I do a lot of walking in my kitchen.
2003-05-29 12:37:26 AM  
i place my sharps sideways pointing in along the side of the upper rack....which is sorta like what happened on my honeymoon
2003-05-29 12:37:39 AM  
Hella scary... I was thinking the dumb woman somehow got stuck in the machine and was washed to death. But to be impaled by dirty kitchen knives... ack!
2003-05-29 12:39:49 AM  
Perhaps she just wanted to pierce her belly button multiple times.
2003-05-29 12:40:20 AM  
Putting knives in the dishwasher facing UP.....LMAO

She deserved it that biatch.

PLEASE send all hate mail to FARK.com
2003-05-29 12:47:56 AM  
[image from tiscali.co.uk too old to be available]

man, what a creepy movie...
2003-05-29 12:50:19 AM  
I guess I should be thankful that my kitchen isn't really big enough to cruise around with the dishwaher wide open. What was she doing?? Skidding around the lino. on her socks???
2003-05-29 12:50:57 AM  
"People should, if they can, make sure that they have knives pointing down in the dishwasher, even though some manufacturers say otherwise," a RoSPA spokesman said.

I am surprised that the maker of the dishwasher hasn't been sued. It's all their fault, ya know?

/blatant sarcasm
2003-05-29 12:54:47 AM  
I was hoping for some kind of comical industrial dishwasher accident in which the corpse came out all wrinkly, but this is more nightmare-inducing. A stupid accident, to be sure, but the thought of falling on pointy ojbects always gives me the heebie-jeebies.
2003-05-29 12:57:49 AM  
I wonder if her last words were "Damien, it's all for you!"

I may have butchered the quote. Please don't hate.
2003-05-29 12:58:05 AM  
2003-05-29 12:59:02 AM  
Shumz: Totally agree.

Bobbette I can honestly say I put the knives pointing upward in the dishwasher. Why? because the knives break the plastic case otherwise. But I think I will change my habit as for now. Lives are more important than plastic. Well some lives.
2003-05-29 01:01:09 AM  
Rogue PixieWhat was she doing?? Skidding around the lino. on her socks???

Speaking of evil children, as a wee lass, for laffs I used to spray the linoleum floor in my brother's room, just inside the door, with Pledge furniture polish. Slicked it up real good. Unfortunately, it was my mom who ended up going down on her ass. I never confessed to the crime. If she had died, and it was 2003, it would be an item on Fark, with a note from a safety organization spokesperson along the lines of "People should, if they can, make sure that they don't apply furniture polish to their floors, even though some manufacturers say otherwise."

Try it in your home today! Guaranteed hilarity (and tailbone injuries) for the whole family!
2003-05-29 01:05:40 AM  
dishwashers dangerous, try falling on knives as being dangerous.

/immediate "don't try this at home" label being circulated.
2003-05-29 01:07:29 AM  
Hmm. Our knives have certainly damaged the plastic case slightly, but can't you get new plastic cases eventually?

I'm sure they're replaceable.
2003-05-29 01:18:21 AM  
Too bad Jackass wasn't there with cameras. This'd be a shoo-in for the sequel!
2003-05-29 01:21:33 AM  
For those who didn't get the reference, it's Damien the evil hell child (son of a nun and the devil, if I'm remembering correctly) who starred in Omen, Omen II, and Omen III - but not Omen IV. See book and movies. Mostly movies. Also has associated music. References all over pop culture, including South Park and 'Good Omens'.
2003-05-29 01:40:44 AM  
Keep your pens pointing down in your pen mug at work.
Keep all glassware on the bottom shelf of the bottom cupboard. And put a rubber band around the cupboard handles.
All people with acne on their bums should flush after every plop to ensure dirty water does not enter the bloodstream.
Do not look upward suddenly while riding the "up" escalator.
Always wear rubber-soled shoes when turning on a light.
Use both hands when manipulating clothespins and paperclips.
A bandaid on your thumb will prevent pen-clicking blisters, lessening the odds of infection and gangrene setting in.
Sit up straight.
Do not wear pull-overs. Always wear button-downs. The risk of accidental strangulation is too high.
2003-05-29 01:47:12 AM  
Aaaaw, that cute little kid is all grown up now.
2003-05-29 02:04:31 AM  
[b]Scaryduck[/b] Now that's funny.
2003-05-29 02:06:28 AM  
the bad thing is she burnt the cassrole and dinner was late.
2003-05-29 02:11:02 AM  
What?! No Dinner!

/obscure Blondie reference.
2003-05-29 02:29:57 AM  
I knew this sounded familiar. Not really a freak accident.
2003-05-29 03:40:58 AM  
Knives dull when you put them in the dishwasher. Wash them off after you use them and put them away pronto. Duh.
2003-05-29 04:04:46 AM  
"who's Damien"

damn, way to show your age... and im old at 31 for knowing it right off the bat...
2003-05-29 04:32:00 AM  

We meet again. I'm 25 and I knew it right off the bat too. My nephew's name is Damien; I'll never forget the look on my Dad's face when he heard his name.
-made me rent the movie!
2003-05-29 04:37:34 AM  
I am now printing out this article and going to give it to my dumbass teenage son ,who, on the rare occasion that he eats without using his fingers, and the even rarer occasion that he actually can remember what that big white thing in the kitchen is for, so he will realise that "pointy up styleee" for steak knifes is not a good thing. Despite being told a dozen times by someone significantly more intelligent (i.e. ME) ...pah
2003-05-29 05:42:17 AM  
sounds like a case of domestic violence.
2003-05-29 06:13:29 AM  
Note the page title. "Witness the Event" I want video g'dmnit.
2003-05-29 06:35:30 AM  
Keep your pens pointing down in your pen mug at work.

Did anyone else read this as "Keep your penis pointing down [...at work]"?
2003-05-29 06:57:33 AM  
Yes! Sweet Jesus! My name has been immortalized in a fark headline! All my friends will be SOOOO jealous!

Ok. I've had my pathetic no-life moment....
2003-05-29 07:29:37 AM  
I think the bit about keeping the knives point down is meant to preserve good cutlery from being dulled where it comes in contact with the basket. Honing is a pain in the ass, and professional sharpening can be expensive.

A better solution, though is to wash your good cutlery by hand. It takes a few seconds really, knifes just can't get as dirty as plates and cookware. Plus, the dishwasher will destroy wooden handles eventually.

Laser serrated knives won't be damaged by being washed point down, and can't be sharpened or honed anyhow.

/chef hobbiest
2003-05-29 07:34:12 AM  
"The last time this happened we thought it was a freak accident but this case does show there is a danger from dishwashers."
Okay, when are the leftist dishwasher-control advocates going to come out of the woodwork screaming about every child's right to be free from dishwasher violence.

Stupid whore. It was her own damned fault for putting the knives in there blades-up. This is more like Darwin Award material.

2003-05-29 07:42:36 AM  
Udo: Too bad Jackass wasn't there with cameras. This'd be a shoo-in for the sequel!
BWAW-HAW-HAW-HAW-HAW! I can see it now:
"I'm Johhny Knoxville,
and this is Dishwasher Diving."
[image from virtualvoyage.com too old to be available]

2003-05-29 08:47:36 AM  
That mother must have cheated Death sometime in the past. The kitchen was her Final Destination.

Really, this incident seems like something contrived to scare the average housewife.
2003-05-29 08:55:03 AM  
The pic on the atricle reminds me of the Monty Python sketch about the "deadly joke"

The Nanny-State is licking their chops at this one...I can just see it...

- all dishwashers must be designed so it will be IMPOSSIBLR to put the knoves in upside doen...

- It will be punishable by a 5000-pound fine to attempt to sell or even GIVE AWAY on old dishwasher

- Any old dishwashers left for garbage pick-up MUST have their cutlery racks removed and chopped up into piecies less than 2.5 cm long before putting it at the curb..
2003-05-29 09:04:52 AM  
OH FARKING GREAT! Now I'm going to be self-conscious for the rest of my life in making sure I don't die whenever I wash the dishes. Oh wait, if my dishwasher actually farking worked, I'd use it. Piece of shiat. I swear, I put a perfectly clean glass in the thing and two hours later, it comes out white crusted and dirty.

Oh and knifes up all the way. Slipping is for idiots.
2003-05-29 09:10:51 AM  
In other news, man dies while running with scissors.
2003-05-29 09:14:16 AM  
Man, just when you think the stupid people of the world have run out of ways to die needlessly at their own hands...
2003-05-29 10:36:22 AM  
Knives dull when you put them in the dishwasher. Wash them off after you use them and put them away pronto. Duh.

Jesus... having worked in commercial/resaurant kitchens for many years, I can honestly say that if anyone put MY knives through the dishwasher, I'd freakin kill them.
I came close with a couple of new dishers... NEVER put a good knife in a dishwasher.
2003-05-29 10:37:06 AM  
Forgot to close the tag.
Too early in the morning.
2003-05-29 10:51:41 AM  
one can only hope there will be many jackass sequels.
2003-05-29 11:19:06 AM  
My husband goes into diatribes if he catches a sharp knife in the dishwasher. Those suckers get washed by hand around here, so we can just slit our fingers off instead.

But now I have a good ma's yak at my teenage daughter!

"Just don't do it-- for God's sake, it could kill ya! You could poke an eye out on those things!" (Pan out to teenager rolling eyeballs.)

you made me cry. I can't even think of what I WAS going to post after that. Teenagers; don't ya love 'em? Can't live with 'em----- aw sheeyat, can't live with them.

/do they ever leave?
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