If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(News24)   Man reconciles with wife who cut off his penis when he asked for divorce   ( news24.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
•       •       •

7899 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 May 2003 at 1:52 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

59 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-05-28 10:06:38 AM  
Apparently she must have cut off his balls as well
2003-05-28 10:37:39 AM  
Well, my heart tells me that he deserves anything he gets from this point forward. Is it "right" that he gets filleted by this biatch? No, but just as you don't walk down Independence Avenue at night in lingerie with $20 bills pasted to your niapples, you don't return to a woman (or man) who's done physical violence to you.
2003-05-28 11:40:46 AM  
Well, I'm just glad they're back together again...

Tip your waitresses.
2003-05-28 12:41:05 PM  
A much, much more tolerant and forgiving husband than I could ever be. Or could ever want to be.

Perfectly stated, Stevarooni.
2003-05-28 01:11:16 PM  
Every masochist needs a sadist...
2003-05-28 01:43:25 PM  
Cut my shlong off once and it could have been a mistake, cut my shlong off twice and I'm making a shiat load of salad.
2003-05-28 01:56:29 PM  
Dear God why?!?!
2003-05-28 01:57:13 PM  
He better not cheat on her! There will be consequences and he knows it.

"Do the laundry please"
"ummm, do I have to?"
Wife gives him one of those looks
"uhh, I'll get right on it"
2003-05-28 01:57:39 PM  
Ladies and gentlemen:
John Wayne.
[image from lvrj.com too old to be available]
Bobbitt, that is.
2003-05-28 01:59:30 PM  
What a pvssy!
2003-05-28 02:00:18 PM  
Stevarooni- Heh. I like that. But I would have made the street Martin Luther King Dr. instead of Independence Ave. Here in DC, you can walk down Independence at night. If you try the same on MLK, especially if you're white, you won't ever be seen again. Not in this world, anyway.
2003-05-28 02:00:27 PM  
Best use of
img.fark.netView Full Size
in a long time.
2003-05-28 02:00:36 PM  
2003-05-28 02:01:28 PM  
NoYOUSuck- i don't think she has to worry about him cheating on her....he's missing some needed equipment
2003-05-28 02:02:28 PM  
"Hey, honey, remember that one time you cut off my penis?"
2003-05-28 02:04:31 PM  
Missygirl: It was successfully reattached.
Which translates as it didn't turn black and rot off.
I doubt it has any feeling or is good for anything besides running water thru.

What I want to know is, why isn't this woman in jail?

This was a serious assult.
Maybe even attempted murder.
Considering how easy it would be to bleed to death from that kind of injury.
2003-05-28 02:07:23 PM  
Perhaps he can star in the John Wayne Bobbit sequel, "Frankenpenis II Electric Boogaloo."
2003-05-28 02:07:54 PM  
Well glad to see that stupidity and poor self-preservation aren't limited to the xx chromosome crowd.
2003-05-28 02:08:30 PM  
HAHAHAHAH Did that article really just refer to his penis as "his fruit juice" ?!? HAHAHAHAHAH
2003-05-28 02:08:31 PM  
Did anybody read the bit? He had it reattached for god's sake.
2003-05-28 02:08:39 PM  
His wife cut off his penis after lacing his fruit juice with a sedative

Maybe it's just me, but if your pissed enough to cut off a guys Johnston, wouldn't you want him awake for the procedure too? If only to watch his facial expressions and listen to him scream like a little girl.
2003-05-28 02:09:25 PM  
Is he nuts? What a d*ck ! Use your head man! She's giving you the shaft!
2003-05-28 02:10:53 PM  
oh wait nevermind. i get it now...she laced his fruit juice! hahaha i'm so stupid..

/homer simpson
2003-05-28 02:13:56 PM  
Ok so he had his penis reattached... he can forgive her for committing a felony (Bodily harm with a deadly instrument). Is this what the bible means that marraiges are for better or worse???

I'm never marrying.. what a stupid tradition
2003-05-28 02:14:52 PM  
"where's the money lebowski!?!?"
2003-05-28 02:16:42 PM  
well if he didn't get it reattached, according to ripleys believe or not, a penis can be made out of a middle finger. some guy actually had this done.
2003-05-28 02:17:07 PM  
RabidWeasel, sounds exactly like the Chris Rock bit about MLK being an icon depicting independance, but whatever city you're in, if you're on MLK Blvd you better RUN!

Jer2911tx, It was missing. Thank god for the lost and found box I guess. It was re-attached.
2003-05-28 02:19:51 PM  
GIS for lame dick:

[image from marverti-righi.it too old to be available]
2003-05-28 02:24:36 PM  
Next story: Man who reconciled with wife who cut off his penis arrested for killing wife. "It was less painful than asking for a divorce," he said.
2003-05-28 02:26:05 PM  
What other choice does he have? No OTHER woman will want a penis-less man. So he either has to go back to the biatch or learn to do his own laundry.
2003-05-28 02:26:37 PM  
Missygirl... hmm, new account, just happens to have MyTwoCents' homepage... I think they are one and the same!
2003-05-28 02:26:49 PM  
I understand his master plan.
He will drug her, then cut off her boobies and sew them to her hips. Then she will just be another flat chested, fat assed, man hating spinster.
2003-05-28 02:29:57 PM  
It's good to see that they were able to patch things up. And that they are also getting back together as well.
2003-05-28 02:31:13 PM  
I'd hit it...and run.
2003-05-28 02:31:33 PM  
Women...cant live with them with your penis intact...cant live without them.
2003-05-28 02:33:50 PM  
I hope he reconciled with his penis first.
2003-05-28 02:33:59 PM  
Unless we get a follow up in a week or 2 about how he drugged her up and cemented in her honeypot and cut off her nipples then this guy is the biggest moron on earth.

I mean how could you put "she cut off my pecker" behind you and go on W your marriage? My wife hit me a few times pulled a knife on me and I couldn't forgive that despite the fact that she couldn't hit and I took the knife from her in 5 seconds Wout injury. And hers were always spontaneous anger moments, not a premeditated attack like this one.
2003-05-28 02:36:07 PM  
[image from news.bbc.co.uk too old to be available]

You'd have to sew 'em back on first.
2003-05-28 02:40:07 PM  
Not this kid. As far as I am concerned, lop off Mr. Winky, and you're history. No second chance for that one.
2003-05-28 02:40:22 PM  
Good punishment for her. No more dick. If she cheats, she gets to have something removed too.
2003-05-28 02:46:24 PM  
Maybe he should have said 'please'......
2003-05-28 02:49:26 PM  
Reminds of this old John Bobbit on the web:

"The Lion Sleeps Tonight" Originally by The Tokens
"John Bobbit Sleeps Tonight" Parody by Candy

In the bedroom, the mighty bedroom, John bobbit sleeps tonight.
In the kitchen, the mighty kitchen, Lorana grabs a knife.
A weenie whack, a weenie whack...

Owooooooooooo-oooooooooo-oh she threw it in the grass...
Owwooooooooooooo-oooooooo the cops busted her a$$!
2003-05-28 02:55:30 PM  
is it understandable to mutilate your wife after you find out she cheated on you? or is that still just a man being an abusive jerk?

/hypothetical, of course...
2003-05-28 02:56:30 PM  
She just needs her clitoris chopped off and maybe she would have more respect for other people's private property
2003-05-28 03:04:51 PM  
Anyone notice the source?

Ananova.com = BS
2003-05-28 03:09:17 PM  
hmm wouldnt she go to JAIL
2003-05-28 03:12:13 PM  
i agree missy... personally, i'd have to save it for something big. as my grandpappy used to say, "you only get once chance to kill. save it for something good".

(okay, i just made that up.)
2003-05-28 03:15:15 PM  
Not only should this lady go to jail for FIRST DEGREE ASSAULTING but she should have her tits/clitoris and juices cut off (and juices = dranken)
2003-05-28 03:24:03 PM  
Look I'm afraid of the TOSSED SALAD MAN.. I will never murder! See there is a deterent to crime!

As for attention whoring.. you know.. why do people have a problem with it. I say if they get the attention more power to them...

Ok from this post on we must say something nice about MISSY...
2003-05-28 04:00:43 PM  
Missygirl is now MISSINGgirl.. hehhehe
Displayed 50 of 59 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.