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(Some Guy)   Saddest. Book. Ever. (*Submitter adds it to Amazon wish list*)   ( spreadthefword.com) divider line
491
    More: Sad, flapjacks, ice cream  
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61812 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Mar 2010 at 2:03 AM (8 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



491 Comments     (+0 »)
 
 
sleeping martyr
2010-03-24 09:36:19 PM  
That would be a great book to give to your soon-to-be ex-.

"I got this for you"
What do i need this for?
"Welcome to dumpsville, population, YOU!"


\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"
 
FriarReb98 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-24 09:39:53 PM  

sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


The sound of that title alone makes me think I want nothing to do with it....
 
just_ducky
2010-03-24 10:11:05 PM  

sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Agreed. I got that as a present when my daughter was born and promptly hid it on the shelf after one reading. Made me get a lot of dust in my eye.
 
eyehate
2010-03-24 10:47:32 PM  
quarterlyconversation.comView Full Size
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-24 10:56:43 PM  
WOW.

The cover of that book was bleaker than the entirety of Requiem for a Dream.
 
MasterThief
2010-03-24 11:01:42 PM  
"Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

/obscure?
//also very sad
 
Jimmy Devil Rocket Science
2010-03-24 11:07:03 PM  
"For sale: Baby shoes, never used."
 
NuttierThanEver
2010-03-24 11:08:26 PM  
Not even close to the saddest
Mommy, Please don't cry (new window)
 
yogaFLAME
2010-03-24 11:11:48 PM  
Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.
 
Slick Johnson
2010-03-25 12:29:17 AM  
Favorite reading over here since the dump

/actually only eat when I have to since then as eating is a chore in itself
 
DrySocket
2010-03-25 01:20:31 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


Damn you for mentioning that book. I think I got something in my eye.
 
Cagey B [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 01:56:13 AM  
eyehate

That's not even the saddest Cormac McCarthy book.
 
Hector Remarkable
2010-03-25 02:06:21 AM  
Sounds like an exciting and erotic journey.
 
Fano
2010-03-25 02:06:45 AM  
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


Best employee motivational handbook I ever had!
 
EighthundredmillionthFarker
2010-03-25 02:09:41 AM  

sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

How would you like that to be your mother-in-law?

/hid book on shelf as well
 
Mitch Mitchell
2010-03-25 02:10:30 AM  
Quick... where's the microwave popcorn? This is gonna be fun!
 
Fell In Love With a Chair
2010-03-25 02:11:29 AM  
I Love You Forever is easily the saddest book ever. I don't know if I recall right, but doesn't his mom bite it at the end, and he says the whole, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." thing back to her while holding her?

/shiat.... promised myself I wouldn't cry....
//Red Fern close second though....
 
EL_FABREZ
2010-03-25 02:11:30 AM  
eyehate The Road

Someday somebody will tell me why this book is so super sad. Telling me that I don't have a soul cannot be the right answer.
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:12:24 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


I've never even owned a dog, and that's still one of the saddest damn endings I've ever read.
 
Phoenix_M
2010-03-25 02:13:29 AM  
Cormac McCarthy is a hack, the only reason "The Road" won any awards is because McCarthy is 80 & close to death.
 
Gyrfalcon
2010-03-25 02:14:12 AM  
That woman has never been NEAR a microwave.....
 
not_an_indigo
2010-03-25 02:14:59 AM  
That's...somewhat demented.
 
OnmyojiOmn
2010-03-25 02:15:54 AM  
 
Jeff God of Biscuits
2010-03-25 02:16:21 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

How would you like that to be your mother-in-law?

/hid book on shelf as well


110% with you on this one. I read it as a child, and upon finding it in a bookstore as an adult, and re-reading it, I wonder what the hell my parents were thinking. There's a distinct "a boy's best friend is his mother" vibe to it.

That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.
 
jingks
2010-03-25 02:16:44 AM  
She has a TV appearance.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:17:21 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

How would you like that to be your mother-in-law?

/hid book on shelf as well


You know, that's valid. My mom read that to me and I also thought it was a sweet book, but now that I think about it.... wow, lady had issues. And the dude never married so it was ok for his mom to come get in bed with him as an adult? What the hell were they trying to teach kids?

My childhood... it was... a lie.

DAMN YOU
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:18:30 AM  

Jeff God of Biscuits: That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.


Ooh, that one is sad. Mine though is Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes. WHY DID WE DROP THE ATOM BOMB WHYYYYYY
 
UsikFark
2010-03-25 02:18:32 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: The cover of that book was bleaker than the entirety of Requiem for a Dream.


Imagine cowering in the corner while your fridge full of condiments rocks and shudders towards you, your only exit blocked by the microwave's gaping, flailing door. This is the paranoid life of the Single American Male, who, desperate for comfort outside society, has become the dreaded, demented Dope Fiend.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:20:41 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: It's gonna be okay... shhhh... there there

*shudders again*


GAH I think that violates the graphic images clause in TOU. Someone delete that post IMMEDIATELY.
 
Yume no Hikari
2010-03-25 02:20:48 AM  

NuttierThanEver: Not even close to the saddest
Mommy, Please don't cry (new window)


Were I - FSM forbid - to be in a position to be in receipt of that book, I suspect I'd want it nowhere near me as it would no doubt just rub salt in all-too-tender wounds.

/think I'll go hug my kids now
//came to play ITG, leaving humiliated
 
Epsilon
2010-03-25 02:20:55 AM  
So it's hilarious when someone loses their whole family and is forced to live alone?
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:20:55 AM  
images.amazon.comView Full Size


Biggest downer of a book ever inflicted upon the junior high school kids of my generation. Thanks for sucking the life out of us, Mrs. Peterson.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:21:54 AM  

sleeping martyr:

\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Hated that book so much. Every year my aunts and uncles would leave a few new books on my grandparent's farm (book ravenous family), and it ended up on the farm one year.

Three months after my mother had died.

I couldn't stop crying all summer after reading that damn book.

/no one gave the book a second thought
//the next year I took it and buried it out in the field to get rid of it
 
EighthundredmillionthFarker
2010-03-25 02:22:20 AM  

Genevieve Marie: EighthundredmillionthFarker: It's gonna be okay... shhhh... there there

*shudders again*

GAH I think that violates the graphic images clause in TOU. Someone delete that post IMMEDIATELY.


Yeah, plus I need to wake up in 3 hours. Sleep ain't happenin' tonight. Time to go lock my windows.
 
Daroc
2010-03-25 02:22:39 AM  

NuttierThanEver: Not even close to the saddest
Mommy, Please don't cry (new window)


Look at the freakin list of related titles! There are dozens of books about this. I want to cry just looking at it. I don't even have kids!
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 02:23:12 AM  
UsikFark: Imagine cowering in the corner while your fridge full of condiments rocks and shudders towards you, your only exit blocked by the microwave's gaping, flailing door. This is the paranoid life of the Single American Male, who, desperate for comfort outside society, has become the dreaded, demented Dope Fiend.

It's not as disturbing as the My Teacher is an Alien books, but STILL.


Genevieve Marie: Jeff God of Biscuits: That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.

Ooh, that one is sad. Mine though is Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes. WHY DID WE DROP THE ATOM BOMB WHYYYYYY

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.

A thread of this nature wouldn't be complete without The Giving Tree.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:23:30 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: Biggest downer of a book ever inflicted upon the junior high school kids of my generation. Thanks for sucking the life out of us, Mrs. Peterson.


Oh man did I hate that book. So much so that when the kid finally died I was like wow, FINALLY. Took long enough. I thought leukemia was a tough disease.

/I may have had the makings of a farker from quite a young age, looking back.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:24:53 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: A thread of this nature wouldn't be complete without The Giving Tree.


That bastard kid. He took all the tree had to give and it wasn't enough. I bet he beat his family and wrote the screenplay to glitter.
 
Daroc
2010-03-25 02:25:14 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


I should really stop clicking stuff like this.
 
entitygm
2010-03-25 02:26:06 AM  

Fell In Love With a Chair: I Love You Forever is easily the saddest book ever. I don't know if I recall right, but doesn't his mom bite it at the end, and he says the whole, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." thing back to her while holding her?


snowbirdchronicles.comView Full Size

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my Mommy you'll be.

/ surely not obscure
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:26:21 AM  

Epsilon: So it's hilarious when someone loses their whole family and is forced to live alone?


Only if someone loses their whole family at WalMart.
 
Shakin_Haitian
2010-03-25 02:26:48 AM  
upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size


The ending to this book was rough.

/by that I mean the real ending, not the gay ass epilogue.
 
DaintySavage
2010-03-25 02:26:49 AM  

Jimmy Devil Rocket Science: "For sale: Baby shoes, never used."


that line brings tears to my eyes every time i see it. i have a 16 month old daughter, and im so damn lucky to have her. i was at the hospital for my best friend to become an aunt for the first time. the baby was still-born. the saddest thing i have ever been a part of
 
heypete
2010-03-25 02:26:50 AM  

sleeping martyr: for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Seriously.

I think my mom still has that book in her collection somewhere. I recall re-reading it as a teen and I got all teary-eyed.
 
sforce
2010-03-25 02:26:56 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


That is one of the few books I've read more than once..

The other was Wayside School is Falling Down.
 
aharown
2010-03-25 02:27:43 AM  
eyehate's book was exactly what I thought of when I read the headline.

The Road is grim and tragic and difficult to take.
 
jimi32
2010-03-25 02:27:52 AM  
Link (new window)
 
UsikFark
2010-03-25 02:27:53 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: Only if someone loses their whole family in another customer's rolls of fat at WalMart.
 
Daroc
2010-03-25 02:28:01 AM  
Oh and Ill just leave this here....
thespinoff.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
KCRovert
2010-03-25 02:28:13 AM  
For me, it's always been 'The Giving Tree'...similar storyline...just tears me up everytime.
 
EighthundredmillionthFarker
2010-03-25 02:28:30 AM  

RevMercutio: One of the saddest non-fiction books I've read in the past couple years.


Great book. Aneurysms suck.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:29:11 AM  
dreamscapes.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


or

aquanoir.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
assembleravenger
2010-03-25 02:30:03 AM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


brb, have some dust in my eye.
 
DaintySavage
2010-03-25 02:30:52 AM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 02:31:04 AM  
Genevieve Marie: That bastard kid. He took all the tree had to give and it wasn't enough. I bet he beat his family and wrote the screenplay to glitter.

WORSE.

He became the man we know as "Uwe Boll."

:-/


Quark_Quasar: And of course:

www.mychildsclass.com

Although, when I read "The Giving Tree" all my mind came up with was
thatissophat.files.wordpress.com

Oh, damn.

Yeah, The Giver was a tough one, that.


sforce: The other was Wayside School is Falling Down.

THOSE books were the uber-awesomeness.

Everyone made it a point to read those and/or the Indian in the Cupboard books.
 
entitygm
2010-03-25 02:31:09 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


God thanks for reminding me of probably the only book to truly make me cry. On the plus side, it changed my irrational childhood fear of dogs

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


Didn't that episode win an Emmy? Certainly deserved one
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:31:51 AM  

UsikFark: Imagine cowering in the corner while your fridge full of condiments rocks and shudders towards you, your only exit blocked by the microwave's gaping, flailing door.


Reminds me of the Northridge Earthquake.
 
aharown
2010-03-25 02:32:58 AM  
"Where the Red Fern Grows" is not sad. It has a powerfully sad ending, but that's only because the tale in its entirety is so uplifting.
 
Chuck Ruffcorn
2010-03-25 02:33:05 AM  
I found something sad at work that might make a good book title...

Pediatric Cadaver Bag.

/sigh
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:33:12 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: RevMercutio: One of the saddest non-fiction books I've read in the past couple years.

Great book. Aneurysms suck.


Technically, they blow.
 
jimi32
2010-03-25 02:33:29 AM  

DaintySavage: Jimmy Devil Rocket Science: "For sale: Baby shoes, never used."

that line brings tears to my eyes every time i see it. i have a 16 month old daughter, and im so damn lucky to have her. i was at the hospital for my best friend to become an aunt for the first time. the baby was still-born. the saddest thing i have ever been a part of


Real story time:
I was helping a colleague paint his house, and he says to tell "that" joke. The joke is....A woman gives birth to a baby, and the doctor raises it up, spins it around, and throws it against the wall. The woman shouts "My baby!"
and, the doctor says, what the hell it was dead anyway...
His landlords were there, and they just had a miscarriage....
Fark or not, I could never make that shiat up
 
ckellingc
2010-03-25 02:33:29 AM  
Saddest Picture Ever. (new window)
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:33:44 AM  
I just read the plot for "The Road"...


...No thank you.
 
zilch365
2010-03-25 02:33:56 AM  
I think I remember tearing up a bit after reading Sounder.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:34:02 AM  
Bridge to Terabithia NOOOOOOO. WHY LESLIE WHY

Now I'm also thinkinging about Freak the Mighty and Number the Stars.

I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?
 
jingks
2010-03-25 02:34:26 AM  

DaintySavage: only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again


Wanna-be Hachiko.
 
Daroc
2010-03-25 02:34:36 AM  

entitygm:

Didn't that episode win an Emmy? Certainly deserved one


"Roswell that ends well" won an Emmy. "Jurassic Bark" lost to this..Link (new window)
 
zilch365
2010-03-25 02:35:04 AM  

ckellingc: Saddest Picture Ever. (new window)


And there we go again.

What? No, I just got allergies. Really.

/sniff
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:35:26 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Bridge to Terabithia NOOOOOOO. WHY LESLIE WHY

Now I'm also thinkinging about Freak the Mighty and Number the Stars.

I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?


It aint' over until Old Yeller takes one between the eyes.
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:35:49 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Bridge to Terabithia NOOOOOOO. WHY LESLIE WHY

Now I'm also thinkinging about Freak the Mighty and Number the Stars.

I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?


Only if you read my edition of it, where the rescue plane looking for Brian ends up landing on him. :D
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:36:52 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Everyone made it a point to read those and/or the Indian in the Cupboard books.


Yes, those are amazing, so, so amazing.

The Giver is also amazing. Because Lois Lowry does not stop being awesome.

And because this is a kids book thread- if any of you guys want to read the absolute best book I have read for kids and teens in the last- forever- get The Hunger Games and get it now. It's a trilogy and it's been on the best sellers list almost since it came out because it is so powerfully awesome. Read. Read now.

Pick a day when you're tired of being a grownup except for the whole legal drinking age part, and get yourself that book, a nice glass of wine and some tasty cheese and don't leave the house. If it's a rainy day, so much the better.
 
log_jammin
2010-03-25 02:37:10 AM  
I wasn't expecting to laugh when I clicked the link. Then after I clicked I couldn't stop laughing.
 
jaytkay [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:37:32 AM  
lh3.ggpht.comView Full Size
 
nucular bum
2010-03-25 02:37:41 AM  
Link is farked.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:38:02 AM  

Quark_Quasar: Only if you read my edition of it, where the rescue plane looking for Brian ends up landing on him. :D


You are made of unspeakable evil and you have now run afoul of me. This is not a good idea.

-narrows eyes-

but Brian, you were almost there! ALMOST! Keep eating the foolbirds and ride it out!
 
Johnny Bananapeel
2010-03-25 02:38:11 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:38:48 AM  

Quark_Quasar: Genevieve Marie: Bridge to Terabithia NOOOOOOO. WHY LESLIE WHY

Now I'm also thinkinging about Freak the Mighty and Number the Stars.

I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?

Only if you read my edition of it, where the rescue plane looking for Brian ends up landing on him. :D


Sounds like Bambi Meets Godzilla.
 
illicit
2010-03-25 02:38:59 AM  

Quark_Quasar: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: A thread of this nature wouldn't be complete without The Giving Tree.

And of course:

Although, when I read "The Giving Tree" all my mind came up with was


I'm sorry, but I thought The Giver was a terrible book :/
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:39:30 AM  

illicit: Quark_Quasar: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: A thread of this nature wouldn't be complete without The Giving Tree.

And of course:

Although, when I read "The Giving Tree" all my mind came up with was

I'm sorry, but I thought The Giver was a terrible book :/


Wrong you are. Ashamed you should be.
 
mreuther
2010-03-25 02:41:20 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


Also, "Pull it out"
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 02:41:24 AM  
Genevieve Marie: Yes, those are amazing, so, so amazing.

The Giver is also amazing. Because Lois Lowry does not stop being awesome.

Quite right, aye.

We had the good stuff growing up, no doubt about that.


And because this is a kids book thread- if any of you guys want to read the absolute best book I have read for kids and teens in the last- forever- get The Hunger Games and get it now. It's a trilogy and it's been on the best sellers list almost since it came out because it is so powerfully awesome. Read. Read now.

Pick a day when you're tired of being a grownup except for the whole legal drinking age part, and get yourself that book, a nice glass of wine and some tasty cheese and don't leave the house. If it's a rainy day, so much the better.

Duly and truly noted and quoted, then!
 
inthemiddleofitall
2010-03-25 02:41:51 AM  

Fell In Love With a Chair: I Love You Forever is easily the saddest book ever. I don't know if I recall right, but doesn't his mom bite it at the end, and he says the whole, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." thing back to her while holding her?

/shiat.... promised myself I wouldn't cry....
//Red Fern close second though....


BAHHHHH AHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH SNIFF SNORT
 
Korzine
2010-03-25 02:42:26 AM  
Tachikoma, Ah yes, Grave of the Fireflies. I was 12 when I first saw that movie because it was from the same studio as Kiki's Delivery Service. I cried, I still get a lump in my throat when I think of that movie.

Also,

img51.imageshack.us

For a book about homosexual magician's this book is surprisingly depressing.

/No it's not about Siegfried and Roy.
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:42:44 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Quark_Quasar: Only if you read my edition of it, where the rescue plane looking for Brian ends up landing on him. :D

You are made of unspeakable evil and you have now run afoul of me. This is not a good idea.

-narrows eyes-

but Brian, you were almost there! ALMOST! Keep eating the foolbirds and ride it out!


I still thought he got gypped. He didn't get the gun RIGHT UNTIL the end. C'mon, give the kid a break.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:42:52 AM  

Genevieve Marie:
I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?


Have you read Brian's Winter yet? It's a quasi-sequel to Hatchet, only, instead of being rescued Brian has to survive the entire winter out in the wilderness as well.
 
illicit
2010-03-25 02:43:08 AM  

Genevieve Marie: illicit: Quark_Quasar: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: A thread of this nature wouldn't be complete without The Giving Tree.

And of course:

Although, when I read "The Giving Tree" all my mind came up with was

I'm sorry, but I thought The Giver was a terrible book :/

Wrong you are. Ashamed you should be.


Well, two things:
1. I was forced to read it in school. That didn't help.
2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.
 
humanshrapnel
2010-03-25 02:43:35 AM  
80 posts in and I'm the Weeners this pertinent Onion link? ^

/skimmed, could be wrong
 
video man
2010-03-25 02:43:38 AM  
[image from eternalopus.files.wordpress.com too old to be available]

After reading this, I laugh every time the dog dies in any book. It's a sick humor of mine.
/I own a dog; a Rottweiler-mutt-thinger.
 
Outshined_One
2010-03-25 02:43:42 AM  

Cagey B: eyehate

That's not even the saddest Cormac McCarthy book.


Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Guh, that book is so overrated. McCarthy's written some fantastic books, but that sure as hell isn't one of them.

I think the first book ever to make me cry was Old Yeller.
 
log_jammin
2010-03-25 02:43:54 AM  
"I was going to buy it, but I thought some sad old lady might need to buy it. "

Comedy gold!

"I'm so hungry...but All I have to cook with is the microbox...."
 
TheyCallThisWork
2010-03-25 02:44:14 AM  
Whoever put "Grave of the Fireflies" on here is a bastard, and I hate you.

That movie tore me up. The only other time I've been that wrecked by a movie was when I saw Dancer in the Dark.
 
aerojockey [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-25 02:45:03 AM  
I came here expecting to have fun ridiculing microwave "cooking", and you're all talking about sad books. You suck, Fark.
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:45:16 AM  

illicit: illicit: Well, two things:
1. I was forced to read it in school. That didn't help.
2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.


Don't ever read The Dark Tower series by Stephen King.

Don't you do it.
 
humanshrapnel
2010-03-25 02:45:30 AM  

humanshrapnel: 80 posts in and I'm the Weeners this pertinent Onion link? ^

/skimmed, could be wrong


First time I've been pwn3d by the filter right thar.
 
log_jammin
2010-03-25 02:45:34 AM  

Outshined_One: Guh, that book is so overrated. McCarthy's written some fantastic books, but that sure as hell isn't one of them.


It's a great book.

Comparing it to his other books is kinda dumb.
 
aharown
2010-03-25 02:45:45 AM  
I just read "Love You Forever." It was beautiful, but it was not sad.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:46:04 AM  

TheyCallThisWork: Whoever put "Grave of the Fireflies" on here is a bastard, and I hate you.

That movie tore me up. The only other time I've been that wrecked by a movie was when I saw Dancer in the Dark.


Don't worry, the only reason I ever saw Grave of the Fireflies is because a friend of mine told me it was a comedy.

/punched him at school the next day
//actually own the candy tin from the movie now
///yes, I'm the sick person who walks around anime cons eating from it
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:46:13 AM  

Tachikoma: Have you read Brian's Winter yet? It's a quasi-sequel to Hatchet, only, instead of being rescued Brian has to survive the entire winter out in the wilderness as well.


-adds to amazon cart-

I am slightly obsessive by the way. Tfers know, but Liters don't know bout mah kids' book collection.

Why yes, I do prefer to live in a world that contains massive quantities of juvenile fiction. There's nothing wrong with that. What, are you my therapist or something?

illicit: 2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.


Real life doesn't end until you die. I don't think books need to be any different. A tidy ending works sometimes. But sometimes things are too hard for a nice little ending. Also, she ended up doing two sequels that explain what happened :)
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:47:42 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Tachikoma: Have you read Brian's Winter yet? It's a quasi-sequel to Hatchet, only, instead of being rescued Brian has to survive the entire winter out in the wilderness as well.

-adds to amazon cart-

I am slightly obsessive by the way. Tfers know, but Liters don't know bout mah kids' book collection.

Why yes, I do prefer to live in a world that contains massive quantities of juvenile fiction. There's nothing wrong with that. What, are you my therapist or something?


I also suggest Maniac McGee then. And Cages.

/both beautiful, but haunting and sad
 
nesler
2010-03-25 02:47:58 AM  

Tachikoma: dreamscapes.files.wordpress.com
or
aquanoir.files.wordpress.com


You suck a fat one. Gahhhhhhh. I haven't read Terabithia, but I saw the film. That scene was a f*cking shock, and they way they dealt with it was rather amazing. Not a great movie, but that storyline was very, very well done. And a major kick to the balls. And Fireflies... it wasn't heartbreaking, because the dread was there from the beginning. You go in knowing that you're going to watch everything fall apart.

Another book that captures the whole dread thing quite nicely is The Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell.
img143.imageshack.usView Full Size


And f*ck all of you for bringing up The Giving Tree.
 
Zero0o
2010-03-25 02:48:20 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


That's not sad when you realize that your in-game mom sends you messages and presents and that's the one that the comic is really talking about.
 
RevMercutio
2010-03-25 02:48:39 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: RevMercutio: One of the saddest non-fiction books I've read in the past couple years.

Great book. Aneurysms suck.


I was reminded of it recently, since Sheffield did the obit for Alex Chilton in Rolling Stone, and he mentioned that he and his wife's first dance was to Big Star's "Thirteen".
 
Quark_Quasar
2010-03-25 02:48:46 AM  

Tachikoma: Genevieve Marie:
I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?

Have you read Brian's Winter yet? It's a quasi-sequel to Hatchet, only, instead of being rescued Brian has to survive the entire winter out in the wilderness as well.


Oh yes, there's a few books about ol' Brian. Including the one where they intentionally get lost and then, get lost again.

It was called "The River", if I remember correctly.
 
rcf1105 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-25 02:48:46 AM  
I'm so confused. How do you cook a milkshake in the microwave? Is there some sort of reverse-microwave that makes things colder?
 
TheyCallThisWork
2010-03-25 02:48:48 AM  

humanshrapnel: First time I've been pwn3d by the filter right thar.


I'd feel a little biatchagrined over that. It seems idiosyncratic until it happens to you.
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:48:48 AM  

Korzine: Tachikoma, Ah yes, Grave of the Fireflies. I was 12 when I first saw that movie because it was from the same studio as Kiki's Delivery Service. I cried, I still get a lump in my throat when I think of that movie.


Yeah. Weekend At Bernies II did that for me.
 
zerkalo
2010-03-25 02:48:56 AM  
When the wind blows. Made me a liberal, I think. Sad.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:49:21 AM  

Tachikoma: I also suggest Maniac McGee then. And Cages.

/both beautiful, but haunting and sad


Own them both.

My house is a bit like a field trip to the kids section of the library. I even have almost the entire Sweet Valley High series as well as about 75% of The Babysitter's Club and most of the Animorphs.

I don't discriminate- if I loved it as a kid, I have it now, even if it was crappy Scholastic series stuff rather than enduring and beautiful stuff.
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:49:59 AM  

rcf1105: I'm so confused. How do you cook a milkshake in the microwave?


Push the button that says "milkshake". Duh.
 
aerojockey [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-25 02:51:01 AM  
aerojockey.comView Full Size
 
illicit
2010-03-25 02:52:28 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Tachikoma: Have you read Brian's Winter yet? It's a quasi-sequel to Hatchet, only, instead of being rescued Brian has to survive the entire winter out in the wilderness as well.

-adds to amazon cart-

I am slightly obsessive by the way. Tfers know, but Liters don't know bout mah kids' book collection.

Why yes, I do prefer to live in a world that contains massive quantities of juvenile fiction. There's nothing wrong with that. What, are you my therapist or something?

illicit: 2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.

Real life doesn't end until you die. I don't think books need to be any different. A tidy ending works sometimes. But sometimes things are too hard for a nice little ending. Also, she ended up doing two sequels that explain what happened :)


Well, since I didn't like the first one, why would I go through two more? And I just like actual endings, even if they are sad. That's just my personal taste.

I have more experience with depressing movies than depressing books, though. My personal favorite is Old Boy, probably one of the rougher movies I've ever watched, but also one of my favorites, for the very same reason.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 02:53:14 AM  
img26.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
Danger Avoid Death
2010-03-25 02:54:03 AM  

Genevieve Marie: My house is a bit like a field trip to the kids section of the library


You have a creepy old guy in the corner smacking his pasty lips?
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:54:24 AM  

illicit: I have more experience with depressing movies than depressing books, though. My personal favorite is Old Boy, probably one of the rougher movies I've ever watched, but also one of my favorites, for the very same reason.


I hate that movie with every fiber of my being, so, so much and every time it is on at my house I flee the premises because it grosses me out so much. Granted, I've had the story line explained to me and it's a cool (albeit farked up) story, but jesus god, I don't need to deal with that level of pain and misery. Childlike sadness I can relate to, because it's there to teach you about the world. Genuinely horrifying nightmare scenarios like Old Boy? Not so much
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 02:55:09 AM  
Genevieve Marie: My house is a bit like a field trip to the kids section of the library. I even have almost the entire Sweet Valley High series as well as about 75% of The Babysitter's Club and most of the Animorphs.

I don't discriminate- if I loved it as a kid, I have it now, even if it was crappy Scholastic series stuff rather than enduring and beautiful stuff.

Sometime, I'll have to look through my collection and tell you about certain titles I have.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 02:56:30 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Sometime, I'll have to look through my collection and tell you about certain titles I have.


In detail please, so we can wax nostalgic. Remind me to send you a list of fabbity- fab kids and young adult books from the last few years too. Sometimes it's nice not to be a grownup and to read like a kid.
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 02:57:05 AM  
Tachikoma: [Hobbes pic]

[image from img26.imageshack.us too old to be available]
 
Menstrual Cyclist
2010-03-25 02:58:37 AM  

Tachikoma: or


I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 03:01:17 AM  
Genevieve Marie: In detail please, so we can wax nostalgic. Remind me to send you a list of fabbity- fab kids and young adult books from the last few years too.

Right on, right on.

I doubt that my collection is anywhere near as expansive of yours, but I'll have to look through my stuff sometime and give ya the word.


Sometimes it's nice not to be a grownup and to read like a kid.

Heh, you got that right!
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 03:01:45 AM  
img301.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
nesler
2010-03-25 03:03:23 AM  
If you want to stick with the Y.A. stuff, one of the most soul-crushingly depressing books I've ever read would be:

img143.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
redwren
2010-03-25 03:03:23 AM  
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Microwave-Cooking-for-One-by-Marie-T-Smi​th/1395208 97136?v=wall

!!!
 
pup.socket [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:03:46 AM  
mumu. the little match seller. etc. etc.

much sadder shiat than lone cooking has been dumped upon me as a child. thank FSM these days I can choose my soul porn myself and don't have to bother with real life.
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 03:04:07 AM  
Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:05:26 AM  

nesler: If you want to stick with the Y.A. stuff, one of the most soul-crushingly depressing books I've ever read would be:


Ooh, how did I miss that? -amazon cart-
 
OnmyojiOmn
2010-03-25 03:06:06 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.


Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.
 
kxs401
2010-03-25 03:06:33 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Everyone made it a point to read those and/or the Indian in the Cupboard books.

Yes, those are amazing, so, so amazing.

The Giver is also amazing. Because Lois Lowry does not stop being awesome.

And because this is a kids book thread- if any of you guys want to read the absolute best book I have read for kids and teens in the last- forever- get The Hunger Games and get it now. It's a trilogy and it's been on the best sellers list almost since it came out because it is so powerfully awesome. Read. Read now.

Pick a day when you're tired of being a grownup except for the whole legal drinking age part, and get yourself that book, a nice glass of wine and some tasty cheese and don't leave the house. If it's a rainy day, so much the better.


Big yes on the Hunger Games. That is a great book.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:08:09 AM  

kxs401: Big yes on the Hunger Games. That is a great book.


I cannot wait for the third book in August. I haven't loved a book series this much since Harry Potter.
 
anfrind
2010-03-25 03:08:21 AM  

TheyCallThisWork: humanshrapnel: First time I've been pwn3d by the filter right thar.

I'd feel a little biatchagrined over that. It seems idiosyncratic until it happens to you.


I think that's the first thing in this entire thread that actually made me laugh.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 03:08:52 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.


What you need to do is watch what ended up getting called the 'suicide combo' at my high school.

You sit down and watch Grave of the Fireflies. Then continue with My Neighbor Totoro. Finish it off with Jin-Roh.

Guaranteed to make you want to kill yourself.

Half the reason for that order is because when Grave of the Fireflies and Totoro originally came out in Japan, no one thought they would do well independently, so they were released as a double feature with Fireflies being viewed first, and Totoro second.

You'll know the exact scene that shows how horrible an idea that was in Totoro the instant it starts.

/have only watched the suicide combo once
//my knitting kept me sane, but not very well
 
nesler
2010-03-25 03:10:18 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Ooh, how did I miss that? -amazon cart-


I have a feeling that you use Amazon Prime. Have you noticed that some of the used books on Amazon are actually handled by Amazon, and thus eligible for Prime?
 
Begoggle
2010-03-25 03:11:56 AM  
2.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


This is the saddest pic ever.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:12:21 AM  

nesler: Genevieve Marie: Ooh, how did I miss that? -amazon cart-

I have a feeling that you use Amazon Prime. Have you noticed that some of the used books on Amazon are actually handled by Amazon, and thus eligible for Prime?


I have indeed. I am something of an Amazon Prime junkie.

And my boyfriend got me a kindle for Valentines day furthering my amazon addiction.

I need help.

I work 70 hour weeks, spend far too much time lurking around you guys and then read a lot of kids books.

Who needs sleep? Sleep is not needed.
 
aharown
2010-03-25 03:13:23 AM  
Genevieve Marie at al Speaking of reminiscing about kids' books, I love going into the kids' section of my local Border's and seeing which of my favorite books from 20-25 years ago are still popular.

I pray to god that in 15 years Harry Potter will not be easy to find. It simply doesn't compare to Wilson Rawls (ok, so he was kind of a one hit wonder with Where the Red Fern Grows) Scott O'Dell, or Susan Cooper to name a few. Unfortunately with the movie franchise it has become, I expect it will.
 
pelzar
2010-03-25 03:13:25 AM  
I recently read an extremely depressing book geared towards adolescents, but I can't remember the title.

The story is about a kid who attempted suicide by shooting himself in the head. He lived through it, but had severe brain damage. The book is from his perspective while he tried to piece together who he was, what had happened, and why people treated him strange.

It was a mindfark at the very least.
 
Nightjars
2010-03-25 03:13:32 AM  
Haha, one of the comments on the blug post - "But my favorite irony is that I don't even own a microwave. What about "crappy gas-stove cooking for one"? Anyone?"

Talk about thinking that everything always has to be about them... That's ironic? Really?

/ok, i'm done. just thought that was bizarre.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 03:13:49 AM  
img41.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
dalovindj
2010-03-25 03:13:51 AM  
Her website. Become a Facebook fan. This will be go to meme for berating lonesome losers for years to come. Awww, can't get a date? You should try microwaving for one. At least you won't be hungry.

Wish I'd had it in the arsenal for the catcalls thread.
 
dalovindj
2010-03-25 03:14:34 AM  
Link Fail. Retry.

Her website.
 
fallingcow
2010-03-25 03:15:11 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

/ Seen that one before.
// Still gets me.
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:15:33 AM  

aharown: Genevieve Marie at al Speaking of reminiscing about kids' books, I love going into the kids' section of my local Border's and seeing which of my favorite books from 20-25 years ago are still popular.

I pray to god that in 15 years Harry Potter will not be easy to find. It simply doesn't compare to Wilson Rawls (ok, so he was kind of a one hit wonder with Where the Red Fern Grows) Scott O'Dell, or Susan Cooper to name a few. Unfortunately with the movie franchise it has become, I expect it will.


They don't need to be compared- they're each amazing in their own way. I love all those authors, but I love Harry Potter too. J. K. Rowling just wrote a touching kids story in a world that had the potential to be highly commercial. The others did not create a marketable world separate from the real world. But all of them are amazing and I think all of them have their place in kids' lit.
 
kxs401
2010-03-25 03:15:35 AM  

Genevieve Marie: nesler: If you want to stick with the Y.A. stuff, one of the most soul-crushingly depressing books I've ever read would be:

Ooh, how did I miss that? -amazon cart-


Yeah, I just requested it from my library, it looks great.

And the third Hunger Games book is coming out in August? I can't wait! Katniss is such a fantastic heroine.
 
nesler
2010-03-25 03:18:25 AM  

Genevieve Marie: And my boyfriend got me a kindle for Valentines day furthering my amazon addiction.


This is when you learn how to use IRC, so you can download books off of the #bookz channel. Torrents are also good, but #bookz has more. Then you learn to use Mobipocket Creator to convert them to PRC, which the Kindle can use. Then you wind up with approximately 97,000 books on your Kindle.

/First-gen Kindle owner.
//If I weren't unemployed (and increasingly broke), I would own the DX.
///anyone hiring?
 
Genevieve Marie [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:18:30 AM  

kxs401: Genevieve Marie: nesler: If you want to stick with the Y.A. stuff, one of the most soul-crushingly depressing books I've ever read would be:

Ooh, how did I miss that? -amazon cart-

Yeah, I just requested it from my library, it looks great.

And the third Hunger Games book is coming out in August? I can't wait! Katniss is such a fantastic heroine.


Yes she is and yes it is. It'll be called Mockingjay and here's a link to the cover: Link (new window)
 
oohpah
2010-03-25 03:21:30 AM  
In fourth grade our teacher read "Where the Red Fern Grows" out loud to the class a little each day. On the last day all the kids in class ended up in the bathroom crying.
 
jigger
2010-03-25 03:21:47 AM  
The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs?
i39.tinypic.comView Full Size
 
lobootomy
2010-03-25 03:23:27 AM  
Notes Left Behind. (new window)

I farking DARE you not to cry, even if you don't have children. As an added bonus, here's a two page article that summarizes the dad's feelings as his daughter died within a six month period:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/33505113/ns/today-today_books/ (new window)

And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.
 
MSX-01
2010-03-25 03:24:58 AM  
God damn you Fark Im getting all teary eyed
 
Abstruse
2010-03-25 03:24:59 AM  
Wait wait wait wait...

On that tray...how the hell do you make a MILKSHAKE in the farking microwave?!
 
Sid Deuces
2010-03-25 03:26:40 AM  
Sadder book title

My neighbor just bought Microwave Cooking For One and now I can't find my cat
 
oi_piss_me_off [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:29:06 AM  
Tachikoma

oh lord, yes to both of those.
 
nesler
2010-03-25 03:29:50 AM  

lobootomy: And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.


I remember reading a different article about that. God damn it, I didn't want to be reminded of it.
 
rjkline
2010-03-25 03:31:10 AM  
"Obamacare...The Destruction of a Once Great Nation"
 
TheyCallThisWork
2010-03-25 03:32:41 AM  

anfrind: I'd feel a little biatchagrined over that. It seems idiosyncratic until it happens to you.

I think that's the first thing in this entire thread that actually made me laugh.


I was really disappointed that the __c+until didn't convert. It used to.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 03:33:14 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: WOW.

The cover of that book was bleaker than the entirety of Requiem for a Dream.


HAHAHAHA, that's farked up.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 03:35:19 AM  

lobootomy: Notes Left Behind. (new window)

I farking DARE you not to cry, even if you don't have children. As an added bonus, here's a two page article that summarizes the dad's feelings as his daughter died within a six month period:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/33505113/ns/today-today_books/ (new window)

And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.


I remember that!

My mother did the same thing while she was dying, and I ended up finding her last note after I moved away to college several years later (it was tucked away in a book she had loved). I still have the note, but every time I even look at it I start bawling like a little baby again.

/I really should send a copy to my little brother
//but I just can't bring myself to
///I remember his reaction to the 5th season of Buffy, and I don't want to do that to him again
 
brian7dog [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:36:04 AM  

lobootomy: Notes Left Behind. (new window)

I farking DARE you not to cry, even if you don't have children. As an added bonus, here's a two page article that summarizes the dad's feelings as his daughter died within a six month period:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/33505113/ns/today-today_books/ (new window)

Damn I was destroyed after I read that book, passed it on to my sister and she lost it about 5 pages in. Absolutely one of the hardest reads ever

And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 03:38:01 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


I spoke too soon, that's farked up.
 
biobot
2010-03-25 03:38:10 AM  
Doesn't the dog die in Dean Koontz's Watchers? I forget.
 
porkzero
2010-03-25 03:38:16 AM  
the "Wild Turkey 101 Guide to Closure" would be pretty sad if anyone would ever sober up to write it....
or recall it
 
brian7dog [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:38:31 AM  
Not sure what the hell just happened there.

Anyway I was saying that book destroyed me when I read it, so I gave it to my wife. She got about 5 pages in and was a mess. Same with my sister, just an unbelievably harrowing read
 
PaulieVegas
2010-03-25 03:38:59 AM  
I like the list of people this book would be useful for on www.microwavecookingforone.com, especially the last entry:

Busy Households Full of Individual Tastes
College Students
Cost-Conscious Households
Individuals Living Alone
Individuals on a Special Diet or Any Diet
Newly Weds
Retired Couples
Widows and Widowers
Yourself!

Oh yeah? Well fark YOU!!!
 
jingks
2010-03-25 03:39:32 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: I spoke too soon, that's farked up.


Yeah, what kind of weirdo has kids with an MS patient in a wheelchair?
 
red5ish
2010-03-25 03:42:16 AM  
eyehate:

The Road was perhaps the most disappointing, longest sustained piece of crap I have ever forced myself to read. As a fan of the author's other work I expected something to happen, but it could have been a short story dug out of the bottom of Stephen King's reject bin, expanded by a sadist to novel length. Just awful.
 
MattyBlast [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:44:38 AM  
Tuesdays with Morrie
 
fallingcow
2010-03-25 03:46:59 AM  

oohpah: In fourth grade our teacher read "Where the Red Fern Grows" out loud to the class a little each day. On the last day all the kids in class ended up in the bathroom crying.


My wife just finished reading that to her third grade class today.

She assures me that there were tears.
 
Gelatinous
2010-03-25 03:47:25 AM  

pelzar: I recently read an extremely depressing book geared towards adolescents, but I can't remember the title.

The story is about a kid who attempted suicide by shooting himself in the head. He lived through it, but had severe brain damage. The book is from his perspective while he tried to piece together who he was, what had happened, and why people treated him strange.

It was a mindfark at the very least.


Dunno. Might be I Am the Cheese? If not, that book might be up your alley.
 
brian7dog [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:47:58 AM  

MattyBlast: Tuesdays with Morrie


Another crusher, but in my context I was reading it not long after my dad had gone out the same way as Morrie.
 
evaned
2010-03-25 03:50:27 AM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

Maybe because it's because I never had a pet, but I found "The Luck of the Fryrish" much more of a tear-jerker than "Jurassic Bark".

/Wait, did I admit that?
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 03:52:31 AM  
OnmyojiOmn: Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.

I don't know if it's the saddest movie I've seen... but damn if it doesn't rank right up there.


Tachikoma: //my knitting kept me sane, but not very well

That's where the old school gaming comes in for me.

I fire up a copy of Mega Man 2 and I'm good as gold.


Ego edo infantia cattus: HAHAHAHA, that's farked up.

Heh, dude, I'm TELLING you.

Cue up the Requiem for a Dream main theme over a picture of that microwave book and you'll reduce people to tears in NOTHIN' flat.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 03:53:39 AM  
Alright, some one has to say it, so it might as well be me:

ancient-future.netView Full Size



/troll, troll, troll...
// not really, I don't give a sheit what you have to say.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 03:55:45 AM  
derrr. some one = someone.
I blame the booze.
 
evaned
2010-03-25 03:56:20 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Cue up the Requiem for a Dream main theme over a picture of that microwave book and you'll reduce people to tears in NOTHIN' flat.


To be honest, I didn't find most of "Requiem for a Dream" sad so much as... disturbing.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 03:58:41 AM  
That movie was extremely sad and disturbing.
 
Fallout Boy
2010-03-25 03:59:06 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


Goddamn it fu for making me shed man-tears. Real or not it was very moving.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 04:00:17 AM  
I can't get the arse to arse part out of my head.
*shivers*
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 04:00:29 AM  
evaned: To be honest, I didn't find most of "Requiem for a Dream" sad so much as... disturbing.

*nods*

I dig, I follow.

Fair enough, aye.


Ellen Burstyn... damn. She could level the viewer, though.

*And* she was robbed of that.

I don't care if she already won for Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore. She was robbed.
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 04:02:15 AM  
Robbed of the Oscar, I meant.
 
nesler
2010-03-25 04:03:02 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I fire up a copy of Mega Man 2 and I'm good as gold.


Those games suck. All of them. Horrible, horrible games.
 
Shrapnel [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 04:05:02 AM  

UsikFark: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: The cover of that book was bleaker than the entirety of Requiem for a Dream.

Imagine cowering in the corner while your fridge full of condiments rocks and shudders towards you, your only exit blocked by the microwave's gaping, flailing door. This is the paranoid life of the Single American Male, who, desperate for comfort outside society, has become the dreaded, demented Dope Fiend.


You called?
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 04:05:38 AM  

nesler: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I fire up a copy of Mega Man 2 and I'm good as gold.

Those games suck. All of them. Horrible, horrible games.


THANK YOU!
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 04:08:58 AM  
nesler: Those games suck. All of them. Horrible, horrible games.


I think this comment might have made me sadder than any of the books listed above.

:'-/
 
gadian
2010-03-25 04:09:14 AM  
I learned a long time ago that any book featuring cute pets on the cover meant that one or all of those pets would die before the end. Its sort of like how you don't show a gun in a film unless its going to go off later.
 
Yume no Hikari
2010-03-25 04:09:56 AM  

Tachikoma: [Tsukimiya Ayu]
/if you get it, you know it
//if you don't, well, think Grave of the Fireflies but slightly creepier


I never finished the game nor the newer TV series, but the version in the '02 TV series messed with me plenty. That said, it's not "Grave of the Fireflies" depressing.
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 04:14:45 AM  

gadian: ...Its sort of like how you don't show a gun in a film unless its going to go off later.


wow, I honestly can't think of a gun in a movie that doesn't go off. I think you just ruined western film for me.
 
Mija
2010-03-25 04:16:44 AM  

EighthundredmillionthFarker: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

/hid book on shelf as well



My son came running in the front door one night. He ran to his room, locked the door and I could hear him throwing up and gagging. I asked him what was wrong. He said nothing. After a while all sound died and he wouldn't answer me. I thought, oh my gosh he has taken some drug or something and is laying dead on the bathroom floor. I MUST SAVE HIM! So I went outside, pried his window open, crawled in (fell in head first actually because the window was so high) and found him praying to the porcelain gods. He was like, "Mom, get out. I'm just drunk and I have to work tomorrow. I'm trying to get the alcohol out of my stomach. How did you get in my room?!"

/cool story, mom

I did buy this book for my son when he was younger. I signed it and put it away till he has his first child. Then he will understand my crazy love for him.
 
Tachikoma
2010-03-25 04:18:03 AM  

Yume no Hikari: Tachikoma: [Tsukimiya Ayu]
/if you get it, you know it
//if you don't, well, think Grave of the Fireflies but slightly creepier

I never finished the game nor the newer TV series, but the version in the '02 TV series messed with me plenty. That said, it's not "Grave of the Fireflies" depressing.


Watch the newer series (the '02 one sucked pretty bad). It actually does get that depressing. It keeps heaping everything on worse and worse until they get to Ayu, and you realize that pretty much the entire anime was from her point of view to begin with.

/not sure how the '02 series went, couldn't make it past the first ten minutes
//own the Kyoto Animation version on DVD
 
JamisonJamieJames
2010-03-25 04:18:49 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


SNIFFLE!!!
red fern ect ect

Also, i recommended the road to my mother, only to be called that night with her in tears, cursing at me for having her read such a sad book heh oops
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 04:20:57 AM  
I haven't even come close to finishing it, but back to the topic:
mikeely.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
Dwight_Yeast
2010-03-25 04:23:07 AM  

Abstruse: On that tray...how the hell do you make a MILKSHAKE in the farking microwave?!


Someone needs to buy this book just to answer THIS.
 
Archmage of Mampang
2010-03-25 04:25:21 AM  
i216.photobucket.comView Full Size


into the valley of death, rode the six hundred...
 
Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener
2010-03-25 04:26:43 AM  
Abstruse: On that tray...how the hell do you make a MILKSHAKE in the farking microwave?!

Very carefully.
 
Skullduggery
2010-03-25 04:27:12 AM  
Thinking of all the books in my life that have made me cry since childhood... The Giver had me bawling my eyes out when I read it in 4th grade, when they kill one of the twins. I can't read The His Dark Materials trilogy without bawling at the end of the Amber Spyglass. I think Stargirl got me as well, but that's one of my favorite books.

More recently, I was horribly disturbed and depressed after I read 1984 as a freshman in high school. I was in a serious, noticeable funk for at least two weeks. It definitely altered the way I think and I preached about the necessity of reading it to all my friends. Read it again in English as a senior, and it was equally as depressing.

That and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows got me too. Thanks for killing off all my favorite characters...
 
gadian
2010-03-25 04:30:08 AM  

Skullduggery:
That and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows got me too. Thanks for killing off all my favorite characters...


Not Hedwig, you biatch!!! Why? Why?? Oh my god, I hate you.
 
ignite ice
2010-03-25 04:39:08 AM  

sleeping martyr:
\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Over in one. Although, The Giving Tree is up there, as was mentioned by several others ;-)
 
James F. Campbell
2010-03-25 04:41:05 AM  
Saddest book ever? How about Elie Wiesel's "Night"?

It's sad because:

1. Of the scope of human suffering it gives us.
2. The full extent of man's inherent capability for cruelty to other men.
3. This cruelty will probably continue to happen as long as human beings exist.
 
lepetitrobo
2010-03-25 04:42:17 AM  
centering.orgView Full Size
 
Ouisch
2010-03-25 04:45:52 AM  
Microwave Cooking for One: "Heat for three minutes, five minutes, burn it, who cares - you're all alone!!"
 
Nightjars
2010-03-25 04:48:38 AM  
[image from heckofaworld.com too old to be available]

I've lost my only friend in this world.. :(
 
PhilMP
2010-03-25 04:51:24 AM  
All you 'The Giving Tree' people suck. I bought that book a few days ago to give to my niece for her 1st B-day. I don't ever remember reading it and had no inclination to until about 20 minutes ago.

I'm now sitting here trying not to let my roommate hear me cry as I stare at my phone wondering if it's appropriate to call my mother at 2AM.

Screw you guys.

/I never got along, or really even liked, my mom.
//This book has brought me the closest I've ever come to changing that.
 
Thats an 827
2010-03-25 04:52:08 AM  
Manifold Destiny a cookbook for those who live in their car or van down by the river.

Manifold Destiny: The One! The Only! Guide to Cooking on Your Car Engine! (Paperback)
~ Chris Maynard (Author), Bill Scheller (Author)
Key Phrases: greasing foil, injector housing, engine cooking, New Jersey, Manifold Destiny, New England (more...)
 
Ego edo infantia cattus
2010-03-25 04:54:40 AM  
Am I a bad person for just reading the synopsis of all these books on Wikipedia? or just a dumb one?


/"Looks like we got ourselves a reader" - Bill Hicks
 
nesler
2010-03-25 05:00:26 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: Those games suck. All of them. Horrible, horrible games.

THANK YOU!


Someone agrees? I'm not alone in the world? Oh thank you, thank you... :sob:

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I think this comment might have made me sadder than any of the books listed above.


Hateful, nasty things. Choppy-ass character movement reminiscent of playing a Game and Watch LCD game. Levels designed by sadists. Unavoidable deaths without foreknowledge of what's coming.

It's one long, prolonged game of Memory.

Skullduggery: I can't read The His Dark Materials trilogy without bawling at the end of the Amber Spyglass. I think Stargirl got me as well, but that's one of my favorite books.


I was thinking of that series all through this thread, but wasn't sure if it was appropriate. Excellent read. Depressing... so yeah, it qualifies.

PhilMP: /I never got along, or really even liked, my mom.
//This book has brought me the closest I've ever come to changing that.


And the next time you talk to her, you'll be right back where ya were. Trust me, I know. And I hate that god damn book.
 
BlippityBleep
2010-03-25 05:01:56 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: Am I a bad person for just reading the synopsis of all these books on Wikipedia? or just a dumb one?


/"Looks like we got ourselves a reader" - Bill Hicks


"Whatcha readin' for?"
 
scathing1
2010-03-25 05:03:36 AM  

Phoenix_M: Cormac McCarthy is a hack, the only reason "The Road" won any awards is because McCarthy is 80 & close to death.


Retarded. It's a great book, though it's not really sad.
 
pup.socket [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 05:16:01 AM  
also, metamorphosis.
 
Meisaims
2010-03-25 05:22:25 AM  
Korzine: For a book about homosexual magician's this book is surprisingly depressing.

/:I told you I would never leave you when I Chose you,: she said calmly. :I knew what our bond would come to then, when I first Chose you - and I don't regret my choice. I love you, and I am proud to stand beside you. There is not a single moment that I would take back.:
 
oi_piss_me_off [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 05:24:01 AM  
gadian

Skullduggery
That and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows got me too. Thanks for killing off all my favorite characters...

Not Hedwig, you biatch!!! Why? Why?? Oh my god, I hate you.

I laughed, but i seriously did have that reaction.
 
TappingTheVein
2010-03-25 05:30:40 AM  
Imagine reading that book while listening to this album:

farm4.static.flickr.comView Full Size
 
Gaylord Fister
2010-03-25 05:38:23 AM  
Genevieve Marie:

Are you in porn? The name rings familiar.
 
Beertrand
2010-03-25 05:43:20 AM  

Gyrfalcon: That woman has never been NEAR a microwave.....


Jingks: She has a TV appearance.


Erm. GyrFalcon, I have you favorited. After watching Jingks' video, well, I must say you are wrong. For its time, circa 1986, this was a pioneering microwave cookbook. Thanks and props to Jingks. +1 internets

Just watch the video. The author and the host of the show are both articulate and look for the author's alacrity while on camera. You can see both the host and the author thinking while they are talking.
 
JustTheTip
2010-03-25 05:44:32 AM  
Geez people, lighten up on "I'll Love You Forever." The mom holding her son while he was sleeping illustrated her unchanging love for him, it wasn't to suggest that she might actually climb into his upstairs window through a ladder.

As for the way it ends, well, that's just beautiful. Everyone gets old and dies, there's no escaping that. The books shows that love however does not die, but gets passed down through the generations.

I certainly hope that when my time here is done, the love I have shown my children will live on as it is passed to my grandchildren and beyond. That's really the only kind of immortality anyone can ever have.

"Mark how fleeting and paltry is the estate of man -- yesterday in embryo, tomorrow a mummy or ashes. So for the hairsbreadth of time assigned to thee, live rationally, and part with life cheerfully, as drops the ripe olive, extolling the season that bore it and the tree that matured it." - Marcus Aurelius
 
Abstruse
2010-03-25 05:47:48 AM  

Beertrand: For its time, circa 1986, this was a pioneering microwave cookbook.


The Amazon link has a publication date of 1999.
 
thisdaydreamer [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 05:49:27 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: Am I a bad person for just reading the synopsis of all these books on Wikipedia? or just a dumb one?


/"Looks like we got ourselves a reader" - Bill Hicks


I've been doing the same thing.
 
nesler
2010-03-25 05:49:59 AM  

TappingTheVein: Imagine reading that book while listening to this album:


Also known as talking to anyone over the age of sixty five.
 
Beertrand
2010-03-25 06:08:55 AM  

Abstruse: Beertrand: For its time, circa 1986, this was a pioneering microwave cookbook.

The Amazon link has a publication date of 1999.


...Looky at the dateline in the opening of the aforementioned video.
 
kxs401
2010-03-25 06:12:42 AM  

Abstruse: Beertrand: For its time, circa 1986, this was a pioneering microwave cookbook.

The Amazon link has a publication date of 1999.


So... you're unfamiliar with the concept of editions after the first?
 
atar.axia
2010-03-25 06:19:13 AM  
One that I've never read, but always assumed was co-authored by Debbie Downer.

img705.imageshack.usView Full Size


/If not Debbie Downer, then Trisha Traumatized.
//Or maybe Kinky Karen, if my fantasy plays out...
///Screw the aisle seat, I want to be co-pilot.
 
w33dlyw33dly
2010-03-25 06:20:18 AM  
A little kid left a copy of an Aesop's fable at my workplace, the story of the fox and the grapes. This (apparently brilliant) kid had done a little editing, though; he or she tore out a few key pages, completely changing the meaning, turning it into a sad but meaningful tale that expressed the futility of hard work and the cruel joke that is adulthood.

/also sad
//fox, you don't get those grapes. It doesn't matter how hard you tried
///it's in my truck, with my name written in it
 
No Such Agency
2010-03-25 06:20:44 AM  
Ego edo infantia cattus:
gadian: ...Its sort of like how you don't show a gun in a film unless its going to go off later.

wow, I honestly can't think of a gun in a movie that doesn't go off. I think you just ruined western film for me.

I don't recall the antique shotguns in "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" being fired.

Or Singh's hunting rifle in "The Wolfman". It NOT going off was a key plot point (reverse Chekhov?)
 
Ginsbergs Ink
2010-03-25 06:24:44 AM  

Skullduggery: Thinking of all the books in my life that have made me cry since childhood... The Giver had me bawling my eyes out when I read it in 4th grade, when they kill one of the twins. I can't read The His Dark Materials trilogy without bawling at the end of the Amber Spyglass. I think Stargirl got me as well, but that's one of my favorite books.

More recently, I was horribly disturbed and depressed after I read 1984 as a freshman in high school. I was in a serious, noticeable funk for at least two weeks. It definitely altered the way I think and I preached about the necessity of reading it to all my friends. Read it again in English as a senior, and it was equally as depressing.

That and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows got me too. Thanks for killing off all my favorite characters...


I read that monster of a book in one sitting. I cried like a little girl.
Still need to see Grave of the Fireflies, yes, I know. Im an emotional masochist.
Giving Tree makes me sad just thinking about it.
 
w33dlyw33dly
2010-03-25 06:26:31 AM  

Quark_Quasar: illicit: illicit: Well, two things:
1. I was forced to read it in school. That didn't help.
2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.

Don't ever read The Dark Tower series by Stephen King.

Don't you do it.


Wait, that WAS closure; I felt that it ended the only way it could have while remaining true to the plot. I mean, there was no ambiguity in that Roland's plight was clearly going to continue in a fixed and unpleasant way.
 
nucal
2010-03-25 06:32:59 AM  
If the author was in her mid 60s in 1986, that would make her pushing 90 now.

A spectacularly bad interview (new window)
 
Xetal
2010-03-25 06:35:32 AM  
No Such Agency
I don't recall the antique shotguns in "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" being fired.

They are fired by Harry the Hatchet.
 
JustRightRhine
2010-03-25 06:36:07 AM  
Subby: If it's so sad, why am I laughing so hard???
 
No Such Agency
2010-03-25 06:43:33 AM  
Xetal:
No Such Agency
I don't recall the antique shotguns in "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" being fired.

They are fired by Harry the Hatchet.

I must have forgotten that after the Bren gun scene ;)
 
sotua
2010-03-25 06:48:08 AM  

Genevieve Marie: illicit: I have more experience with depressing movies than depressing books, though. My personal favorite is Old Boy, probably one of the rougher movies I've ever watched, but also one of my favorites, for the very same reason.

I hate that movie with every fiber of my being, so, so much and every time it is on at my house I flee the premises because it grosses me out so much. Granted, I've had the story line explained to me and it's a cool (albeit farked up) story, but jesus god, I don't need to deal with that level of pain and misery. Childlike sadness I can relate to, because it's there to teach you about the world. Genuinely horrifying nightmare scenarios like Old Boy? Not so much


Since we're talking sad (OK, Old Boy also packs a shiatload of "sick", but hey...) and oriental movies, I'd suggest Bian Lian^. Watched it in a small theater. Cried my eyes off. After the lights went back on, everybody had puffy red eyes.

/I mean, there's bad luck, and there's Bian Lian
 
Empty Signal Gray
2010-03-25 07:05:48 AM  
bulldogvintage.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


This one just kills me. I mean, the guy only had one eye.
 
ScottFarkus
2010-03-25 07:06:39 AM  
i11.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
STAlphaGeek
2010-03-25 07:16:02 AM  
My Mom is dying, so I'm getting a kick out of all these replies ...

BTW, has anyone seen this?
 
Fuggin Bizzy
2010-03-25 07:17:02 AM  

sleeping martyr: for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Agreed. I'm glad to see so much support for this book here. I thought I was the only one that choked up reading it.

I'd call my mom, but it's like 5:15 AM. She loves me, but she also enjoys sleep.
 
Fuggin Bizzy
2010-03-25 07:24:21 AM  

rcf1105: I'm so confused. How do you cook a milkshake in the microwave? Is there some sort of reverse-microwave that makes things colder?


I've been trying to figure that one out for years. We have a more efficient way to heat things than just "put it in a hot place for a while," but you still have to wait an hour for your beer to chill.

A reverse-microwave beer-chiller would make a lot of money.
 
Badgerlad
2010-03-25 07:27:14 AM  

Chuck Ruffcorn: I found something sad at work that might make a good book title...

Pediatric Cadaver Bag.

/sigh


Farking awesome name for a band, though...
 
exempli gratis
2010-03-25 07:38:00 AM  
I can't be the only Farker who's read "Microwave Cooking for One." Can I?

/I only read it out of curiosity. Ironically, if you will.
//Because I was bored.
///And lonely.
//The recipes are mostly rubbish too.
/so alone.
 
just_another_asshole/jaa
2010-03-25 07:38:18 AM  

STAlphaGeek: My Mom is dying, so I'm getting a kick out of all these replies ...

BTW, has anyone seen this?


was just thinking about this saw it along with "if"
my favorite dog got run over when i was about ten so i learned way early on that anything/anyone you care about will leave you,
and as an avid stephen king reader i kinda got accustomed to characters that you like often die in horrible ways, in fiction
 
res_nihil
2010-03-25 07:38:18 AM  
"We're doin' it for Johnny!"

eastchester.k12.ny.usView Full Size
 
Ebenator
2010-03-25 07:41:54 AM  
Farewell to Arms.
 
generaltimmy
2010-03-25 07:45:08 AM  
No Poopie McBoogerBalls?
 
xanadian [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 07:46:27 AM  
Jesus, you people are such debbie downers.

:-/

*adds some books to shopping list*
 
SouthernKarebear
2010-03-25 07:58:13 AM  

Korzine:

For a book about homosexual magician's this book is surprisingly depressing.

/No it's not about Siegfried and Roy.


It was the first Lackey book that I read. My best friend gave me that book. I cried after reading that trilogy.

True story:
My best friend was given that book as a present. When Vanyel figured out that he was gay, so did my best friend. Talk about a life changing read.
/ Cool story, sis. (Well sort of.)
 
idrow
2010-03-25 08:02:22 AM  
i209.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 08:03:37 AM  

TheyCallThisWork: Whoever put "Grave of the Fireflies" on here is a bastard, and I hate you.

That movie tore me up. The only other time I've been that wrecked by a movie was when I saw Dancer in the Dark.


hehe... both winners in one post....

so all I can say is THIS!
 
Homicidalsausage
2010-03-25 08:06:41 AM  
sasidhar.orgView Full Size
 
badhatharry
2010-03-25 08:16:14 AM  

nesler: Tachikoma: dreamscapes.files.wordpress.com
or
aquanoir.files.wordpress.com

You suck a fat one. Gahhhhhhh. I haven't read Terabithia, but I saw the film. That scene was a f*cking shock, and they way they dealt with it was rather amazing. Not a great movie, but that storyline was very, very well done. And a major kick to the balls. And Fireflies... it wasn't heartbreaking, because the dread was there from the beginning. You go in knowing that you're going to watch everything fall apart.

Another book that captures the whole dread thing quite nicely is The Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell.


And f*ck all of you for bringing up The Giving Tree.


I am reading that one right now. Thanks for not giving any spoilers.
 
Low Rider
2010-03-25 08:18:37 AM  
babble.comView Full Size
 
Marla Singer's Laundry
2010-03-25 08:19:58 AM  

Phoenix_M: Cormac McCarthy is a hack, the only reason "The Road" won any awards is because McCarthy is 80 & close to death.


You know how I know you're a retard?
 
badhatharry
2010-03-25 08:21:30 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: I haven't even come close to finishing it, but back to the topic:


Eye opening for a different perspective of American history. This is not the history written by the victors.
 
StaleCoffee
2010-03-25 08:21:45 AM  
I was thinking what a terribly depressing opener to the day this was. I'm working from home today, and wander back to my other PC, where Planescape: Torment is sitting at the load screen.
 
spartan6652
2010-03-25 08:28:55 AM  
This book right here, tore me up. My wife had a miscarrage too, but this whole book is full of sad.

sammyw.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


/never saw the movie
//figured they'd just mess it up
 
God Is My Co-Pirate
2010-03-25 08:34:10 AM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


Thanks a lot, now I'm getting all teary at work.

/Never Cry Wolf got me as well
 
God Is My Co-Pirate
2010-03-25 08:35:41 AM  
Oh and this:

i40.tinypic.comView Full Size


is the saddest thing I've read recently.
 
SlothB77
2010-03-25 08:35:57 AM  
i know people who go to the supermarket and buy 40 lean cuisines and that is their shop and their diet.
 
fdlgrl
2010-03-25 08:40:26 AM  
Flowers for Algernon. I read it at work and had to wear sunglasses leaving the building.
 
SordidEuphemism
2010-03-25 08:41:32 AM  
I know it's a mediahop, but nothing you show me here will defeat Grave of the Fireflies as saddest story ever told.
 
deipnosophistry
2010-03-25 08:42:03 AM  

Rohasman: "Dear Zachary, A Letter to a Son About his Father"


Oh, man. I watched that with my parents and sister and we were all wrecked afterward. My poor mom was in a funk for a couple of days. Absolutely heartbreaking.
 
TheSignPost
2010-03-25 08:43:42 AM  
Your wife had a miscarriage because of Marley and Me?

The movie was alright, never read the book.
 
jc256302
2010-03-25 08:44:10 AM  
i dont think anyone posted this yet but:
[image from wuhsd.k12.ca.us too old to be available]

also i may be just weird, put i get a welling of emotion from this guy:
ccplic4teens.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


/hot like dr. device
 
Farkwaddle
2010-03-25 08:44:26 AM  
My list (in no particular order):

Flowers for Algernon
All Quiet on the Western Front
Doctor Zhivago
Death Be Not Proud
Where the Red Fern Grows
One Hundred Years of Solitude
A Seperate Piece
The Diving Bell & the Butterfly
 
nonvideas
2010-03-25 08:44:38 AM  

fdlgrl: Flowers for Algernon. I read it at work and had to wear sunglasses leaving the building.


Man, I was in that play in high school (one of the two scientists), and must have run through the final scene 20 times, and it still got me each and every time.
 
nothingyet
2010-03-25 08:47:26 AM  
Lost my Dad in 1998 to Lou Gherig's disease.

1999 Mom gave me a copy of "Tuesdays With Morrie"

Not the best time in my life. Great read, but extremely difficult if you've dealt with ALS.
 
Thoreau Like A Girl
2010-03-25 08:48:31 AM  

Rohasman: Not a book, but the saddest thing I've seen in YEARS:


"Dear Zachary, A Letter to a Son About his Father"


arrghhh. came here to post this. i never recommend that movie to anyone. =(
 
fdlgrl
2010-03-25 08:48:57 AM  
nonvideas: fdlgrl: Flowers for Algernon. I read it at work and had to wear sunglasses leaving the building.

Man, I was in that play in high school (one of the two scientists), and must have run through the final scene 20 times, and it still got me each and every time.

I didn't know there was a play. I would love to see it! (with the comfort of my sunglasses- and maybe a blankie)
 
cetacei
2010-03-25 08:49:26 AM  
i44.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
fdlgrl
2010-03-25 08:50:11 AM  
Gallipoli is my favourite Sad Movie. I can't even watch the happy bits without crying for knowing the ending.
 
OtherLittleGuy
2010-03-25 08:51:25 AM  
{"19-0" Promotional Cover.jpg}

{Cartman Licking Scott Tenorman's Tears.jpg}
 
Krissta
2010-03-25 08:52:27 AM  

Korzine: Tachikoma, Ah yes, Grave of the Fireflies. I was 12 when I first saw that movie because it was from the same studio as Kiki's Delivery Service. I cried, I still get a lump in my throat when I think of that movie.

Also,

For a book about homosexual magician's this book is surprisingly depressing.

/No it's not about Siegfried and Roy.


LOVE this series.

/cried. A lot.
 
Fark-the-Fnord
2010-03-25 08:53:17 AM  
member.tripod.comView Full Size


/Could not make it to the end
 
Giblet
2010-03-25 08:53:47 AM  

rjkline: "Obamacare...The Destruction of a Once Great Nation"


southernfemalelawyer.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
EighthundredmillionthFarker
2010-03-25 08:54:10 AM  
http://www.highbridgeaudio.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/204​x/8a02aedc af38ad3a98187ab0a1dede95/9/7/9781565119420-204.gif

Not saddest, but sad. *sniff*
 
EighthundredmillionthFarker
2010-03-25 08:54:45 AM  
^Dear Zoe
 
Sr Schmu
2010-03-25 08:57:08 AM  
zembla.cementhorizon.comView Full Size
 
benlonghair
2010-03-25 09:02:07 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


You need to read Summer of the Monkeys by the same author if you think that Red Fern is the saddest book in existence.

Also The Education of Little Tree, and the part about the rattlesnake.
 
ciberido
2010-03-25 09:02:10 AM  

Genevieve Marie: I hate that movie [Old Boy] with every fiber of my being, so, so much and every time it is on at my house I flee the premises because it grosses me out so much. Granted, I've had the story line explained to me and it's a cool (albeit farked up) story, but jesus god, I don't need to deal with that level of pain and misery. Childlike sadness I can relate to, because it's there to teach you about the world. Genuinely horrifying nightmare scenarios like Old Boy? Not so much


The fact that Koreans love Old Boy so much scares me.
 
Farkwaddle
2010-03-25 09:02:22 AM  

Fark-the-Fnord: /Could not make it to the end


Nah. If you're going to play the Stephen King card you have to go with something like "The Green Mile", "Shawshank Redemption", "Carrie", or "Lisey's Story". Hell, I though "Just After Sunset" was depressing as hell. Every story in there had to do with a relationship/marriage breakup.
 
wyltoknow
2010-03-25 09:03:00 AM  
Well there are quite a few stories mentioned here that got me in the past, but the most recent one I can think of is Flight. Had to read it for class, surprised me with how interesting and heart-breaking it was. Especially the part with flight instructor...man, it was hard for me to discuss that in class while trying to get past the lump in my throat.
 
res_nihil
2010-03-25 09:03:20 AM  

fdlgrl: Flowers for Algernon. I read it at work and had to wear sunglasses leaving the building.


I read this in 8th grade and I'll echo the sentiment.
 
Farkwaddle
2010-03-25 09:05:51 AM  

benlonghair: yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.

You need to read Summer of the Monkeys by the same author if you think that Red Fern is the saddest book in existence.

Also The Education of Little Tree, and the part about the rattlesnake.


Good book! "Last of the Mohicans" and "Lonesome Dove" also have their fair share of tragedy, but that's an element of every good book.
 
SonOfSpam
2010-03-25 09:06:35 AM  
How about any collection of stories by Jack London. Downers, every one of 'em.
 
denbroc
2010-03-25 09:08:16 AM  
bizarrefilms.blox.plView Full Size
 
ItsJustJake
2010-03-25 09:08:38 AM  

Ego edo infantia cattus: Am I a bad person for just reading the synopsis of all these books on Wikipedia? or just a dumb one?


/"Looks like we got ourselves a reader" - Bill Hicks


It's what I do in all the Horror Movie threads .. ;-)
 
Watson 749
2010-03-25 09:09:23 AM  
Not as sad as Microwave Cooking for 300 Cats
 
Nightsweat
2010-03-25 09:10:34 AM  
1watchmovie.comView Full Size
 
marchnrun4
2010-03-25 09:10:45 AM  
Not a book, but seeing A Separate Peace reminded me of Dead Poet's Society.
 
coinspinner
2010-03-25 09:11:31 AM  
Just to nerd this biatch up...

images-eu.amazon.comView Full Size


Only time I may have gotten something in my eye while reading a book in my adult life.

/best fantasy series. ever.
 
TinaSumthing
2010-03-25 09:13:52 AM  
\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I'm 27 and still cry when I read it...
 
Tanukis_Parachute
2010-03-25 09:15:00 AM  
my wife and i had a full term stillbirth boy (Dylan Cole for those that care). he died two days before her was born. no reason.

in the hospital they put a card on our door. a post card size piece of paper with a leaf on it. On the leaf was a drop of water.

i read a lot of the books mentioned above like mommy, please don't cry. i can't even look at them anymore. if my any of my favorite authors came out with a book with anything like that on their covers...i wouldn't even read it. just can't.


13 years and it can still sting like yesterday.
 
slightly_damaged
2010-03-25 09:19:34 AM  
Is there not enough *real* sadness around that people need to go seeking it out in books??? I've never understood it. I needs me happy books and movies.

/on prozac
//whatever...
 
etant_donne
2010-03-25 09:20:37 AM  
Norwegian Wood
/Haruki Murakami
//quite sad
 
factoryconnection [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 09:23:13 AM  

sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


You son of a... making me tear up at work. My wife got another one as a gift that ranks with "Love You Forever" but I cannot remember the name.

Just the look on the guy's face when he's on the phone... JESUS!

Tanukis_Parachute: i read a lot of the books mentioned above like mommy, please don't cry. i can't even look at them anymore. if my any of my favorite authors came out with a book with anything like that on their covers...i wouldn't even read it. just can't.


That's it... I'm actually streaming tears at work. Boy do I feel like a man.
 
bigbadideasinaction
2010-03-25 09:23:39 AM  

just_ducky: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

Agreed. I got that as a present when my daughter was born and promptly hid it on the shelf after one reading. Made me get a lot of dust in my eye.


Never had that book, but someone thought it was a good idea to read it at a memorial for a friend. So yeah, that title is never showing up in my bookshelf.
 
mofomisfit
2010-03-25 09:24:58 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


If I knew it was going to be that kind of party I'd have stuck my dick in the mashed potatoes.
 
Little Bunny Foo Foo's Uncle Ernie
2010-03-25 09:25:21 AM  
Well isn't this a cheery way to start the day...

Gee Whiz...

How can I depress thee?
Let me count the ways...
 
BarryJV [BareFark]
2010-03-25 09:32:36 AM  
Rohasman: "Dear Zachary, A Letter to a Son About his Father"

That is a little saddening, but mostly maddening.

/Farking Canadians.
//That's the message, right?
 
TinaSumthing
2010-03-25 09:33:09 AM  
Oh, and Coming Up for Air
 
thefonz37
2010-03-25 09:33:38 AM  

Ebenator: Farewell to Arms.


THIS THIS THIS

Came in here to post this.

Leaving depressed.
 
thelordofcheese
2010-03-25 09:33:57 AM  

KCRovert: For me, it's always been 'The Giving Tree'...similar storyline...just tears me up everytime.


One reason my ex is an ex is because that was her favorite book, and I kept calling it a push-over.

She was a children's librarian, so I got to see a bunch of messed up books.

Here's a nice author:
cracked.comView Full Size

renew.netView Full Size

I couldn't find a good cover for "Mommy and Me by Ourselves Again", "She's Not My Real Mother", "When Eric's Mom Fought Cancer", "I Live With Daddy", "Saying Goodbye to Daddy", and there are others.

I swear, she has Salo in her Netflix queue.
 
farfigneugan
2010-03-25 09:34:33 AM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


YOU MOTHER FARKER
 
RockIsDead
2010-03-25 09:35:42 AM  
Gee, and I thought surely you Fark lib douches would consider the saddest book ever "The Story of the Sarah Palin Presidency"?
 
cabritosaurio
2010-03-25 09:36:07 AM  

thefonz37: Ebenator: Farewell to Arms.

THIS THIS THIS

Came in here to post this.

Leaving depressed.


thefonz37: Ebenator: Farewell to Arms.

THIS THIS THIS

Came in here to post this.

Leaving depressed.


tomjensinyc.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


/aprroves
//needed a laugh
 
yakmans_dad
2010-03-25 09:38:46 AM  
Cast in a certain light, the Gospel of Mark would qualify.

Mark 4:11-12

11 And he said unto them, Unto you it is given to know the mystery of the kingdom of God: but unto them that are without, all these things are done in parables:

12 That seeing they may see, and not perceive; and hearing they may hear, and not understand; lest at any time they should be converted, and their sins should be forgiven them.

Jesus has preached his Gospel in such a way so that some people can't understand. If that's not the saddest thing in the world, it'll do until the real thing comes along.

It's part of the Gospel that doesn't get put into the sales pitch.
 
endtimethirtyfour
2010-03-25 09:39:57 AM  

MasterThief: "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

/obscure?
//also very sad


I hope not re: obscure...come on, lit nerds!
 
mofomisfit
2010-03-25 09:40:01 AM  

RockIsDead: Gee, and I thought surely you Fark lib douches would consider the saddest book ever "The Story of the Sarah Palin Presidency"?


Have you confused "sad" with "hysterical"?
 
IXI Jim IXI
2010-03-25 09:44:22 AM  
What's the point of the giving tree anyway? Ask for stuff until you bleed them dry?
 
ThreeEdgedSword
2010-03-25 09:45:07 AM  

Inconceivable!: I read this one back when the SO and I were doing long distance.

[PIC OF TIME TRAVELERS WIFE]

The book isn't so much sad, as it is horrendously cruel. It is a cruel cruel book and it made me hate fiction for a while.


I stopped reading for a long time after that book. Out of everything I have ever read that was Sweetest yet most tragic piece stories. I gave it as a gift three times.

FYI, the movie is awful as is customary.

God Is My Co-Pirate: Oh and this:

[PIC OF NEVER LET ME GO]

is the saddest thing I've read recently.

That was the first book I picked up out of college that I read on my own. [long after Time Travelers Wife] I couldn't read again for awhile. Just tragic.

Tachikoma:
You covered every piece of Anime that made my emotions dance like a mraionnete. The hardest watches are...

Fireflies: *sob* Everyone one needs to see this.
Evangelion: "WHY ANNO! WHY *NUMB*" My absolute favorite anime that's absolutely messed up. The only way to survive the original series and movies is complete emotional shut down. I'll admit it, changed my life and screwed me up for at least six months. I recently bought the series and movie collection again because I'm an emotional masochist. Asuka trumps Shinji in the tragedy department. Which is saying something. EVA also helped me out, a lot later, in pulling me out of my own depression.

I'd give an honorable mention to 5cm A Second [Which you suggested to me several months back]. Mostly because it mirrors my life in a bad way.

/What a way to start the day.
//sadface.
///"SO FARKING WHAT IF I'M NOT YOU!"
 
etant_donne
2010-03-25 09:46:38 AM  

imfallen_angel: TheyCallThisWork: Whoever put "Grave of the Fireflies" on here is a bastard, and I hate you.

That movie tore me up. The only other time I've been that wrecked by a movie was when I saw Dancer in the Dark.

hehe... both winners in one post....

so all I can say is THIS!


Agreed - "Grave of the Fireflies" was rough...

In that same vein, parts of Full Metal Alchemist are very sad: Al missing his mother, and slowly losing his own humanity as he forgets what it is to feel things or have a body... That gets to me.

Maybe Studio Ghibli can animate Norwegian Wood... that wouldn't be depressing at all
 
yourgfsayshi
2010-03-25 09:46:43 AM  

Tachikoma: lobootomy: Notes Left Behind. (new window)

I farking DARE you not to cry, even if you don't have children. As an added bonus, here's a two page article that summarizes the dad's feelings as his daughter died within a six month period:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/33505113/ns/today-today_books/ (new window)

And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

I remember that!

My mother did the same thing while she was dying, and I ended up finding her last note after I moved away to college several years later (it was tucked away in a book she had loved). I still have the note, but every time I even look at it I start bawling like a little baby again.

/I really should send a copy to my little brother
//but I just can't bring myself to
///I remember his reaction to the 5th season of Buffy, and I don't want to do that to him again



My mom died when I was 4, so all I really had left was my dad and grandma. My grandma died when I was 10, and had written my dad a letter about my mom, and how she now had cancer and wanted to spend more time with me. Years later, my dad gave me a bible, that once belonged to my mom, and inside was a picture of me and my grandma, and the letter she wrote to him, 20 years earlier. I cried like a little kid, and couldnt stop re-reading it for weeks.

/still read it every August 11th.
 
lukelightning
2010-03-25 09:47:02 AM  
Not the saddest, but still pretty sad.

filmandmusicfashion.comView Full Size
 
Dialectic
2010-03-25 09:47:10 AM  
I've a got title for such a book:

"Gourmet Meals for My Favorite Person: Me!"
 
trappedspirit
2010-03-25 09:47:37 AM  
 
sunbelly
2010-03-25 09:49:11 AM  
Because of two book threads in two days, I just ordered for the second time in two days from Amazon. Yesterday was the Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark boxed set, today was Love Is A Mix Tape.

Thanks Fark!
 
mofomisfit
2010-03-25 09:49:31 AM  

etant_donne: In that same vein, parts of Full Metal Alchemist are very sad: Al missing his mother, and slowly losing his own humanity as he forgets what it is to feel things or have a body... That gets to me.


Full Metal Alchemist is pretty depressing overall. I mean, it's essentially a show about how farked up humans can be to each other. Ed and Al try to be genuinely good to each other the entire time and they just get farked over by people more powerful than them, and they only achieve their goals in a way that incurs more loss upon them.

/love the show though
 
o5iiawah
2010-03-25 09:49:54 AM  
This thread has caused me to start spotting.

/Thanks Fark.
 
yakmans_dad
2010-03-25 09:50:23 AM  

endtimethirtyfour: MasterThief: "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

/obscure?
//also very sad

I hope not re: obscure...come on, lit nerds!


Name the 3 1999 movies based on it.
 
petethephreak
2010-03-25 09:52:55 AM  
Hector Remarkable 2010-03-25 02:06:21 AM
Sounds like an exciting and erotic journey.

From Milan to Minsk?
 
zomega
2010-03-25 09:53:31 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


THIS. My class read WTRFG.

I think my 6th grade teacher should have realized that having a bunch of kids in a hunting-crazy part of Lower Arkansas read this the week before Deer Day was a really BAD IDEA. I mean, she probably thought it was a great tie-in to a greatly anticipated school holiday, but...

(Hell, I was sitting in class, and I realized that almost instantly. For the sake of those that don't know, some schools schedule a 'Deer Day' the first weeks of deer season because they expect a low turnout - families will say 'screw school, we're going hunting!' )

To this day, some of the biggest macho deep south rednecks I know admit they wept unashamedly when Lil'Ann died.
 
lukelightning
2010-03-25 09:53:38 AM  

yakmans_dad: endtimethirtyfour: MasterThief: "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

/obscure?
//also very sad

I hope not re: obscure...come on, lit nerds!

Name the 3 1999 movies based on it.


Easy. "Bartleby", "The Scrivener", and "The Olson Twins In Manila".
 
th0th [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 09:56:50 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


I remember my 5th grade teacher reading it to us over the course of a couple months. Lady could not stop crying as she read the sad parts. Didn't change my dislike for dogs, so yeah, no soul here, I suppose.

Ditto for "I'll Love You Forever." Got this from Amazon, flipped through it, had to wipe the puddle of tears away and stick it on a shelf for a while. My youngest son loves it, though.

Then again, I cried like a baby the first time I read Sturm Brightblade's death/funeral in Dragonlance's Dragons of Winter Night.

/Wussy
//Not ashamed
 
Krieghund
2010-03-25 09:57:09 AM  
Microwave cooking for one would come in handy for me, since the wife works at dinnertime and I don't want to tear myself away from the computer long enough to cook a proper meal. Maybe I'm sad and lonely and just don't realize it.

Also, I look something like this:

dawngrrl.comView Full Size
 
Oldiron_79
2010-03-25 09:57:56 AM  
Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

OMFG yes, I almost never cry over a fictonal character, much less a fictional DOG(I didn't cry when old Yeller died) and I can't watch the end of "Jurassic Bark" Futurama episode without crying.
 
RadiantAerynSun
2010-03-25 09:59:06 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


you SUCK!
 
zomega
2010-03-25 10:05:04 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.

Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.



The live action is just as tearjerking. I thought I cried when I watched the original animated version, but something about it being portrayed by real actors...gah.

Although...the opening with a relative finding the candy jar wrapped up and hidden among keepsakes at the house (and then her taking it down to an older relative, who went into massive guilt trip mode) was kinda 'what is this I don't even how does this even work?!?!'
 
FeedTheCollapse
2010-03-25 10:10:20 AM  
images.amazon.comView Full Size


Requiem for a Dream is arguably more depressing, but this one is much darker.

/best picture I could find.
 
Oldiron_79
2010-03-25 10:10:43 AM  
I used to think 1984 and Fahrenheit 451 was scary, now that we are already there its just sad that they was used as an instruction manual instead of being taken as a warning.
 
vort3xxx
2010-03-25 10:11:26 AM  
[image from i241.photobucket.com too old to be available]

A good companion for this movie? (which was more entertaining & corny than I expected).
 
bookman
2010-03-25 10:11:58 AM  
The implicit statement that employees are lab rats and have the same goals and desires as mice.

g-ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size
 
shastacola
2010-03-25 10:12:37 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


Damn you.Damn you to hell.
 
nmrsnr [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-25 10:14:04 AM  
So, I may not have a soul for saying this, but I was not moved by Grave of the Fireflies I was more angry at the dumb kid for leaving the aunt because she wanted him to work than sad that bad things happened after he made a bad decision.

The only book that has brought me to the brink of tears was Of Mice and Men, and the only movie was Requiem for a Dream which seriously farked with me.
 
Bad bit in the bit bucket
2010-03-25 10:16:10 AM  
The saddest cookbook is "Cooking for Two Today" when there is no two, only you.

/In some strange way I wish I still had that cookbook.
 
Voiceofreason01
2010-03-25 10:18:18 AM  
sad like this?

ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size


Also the first time I read Farewell to Arms I somehow missed that it was a tragedy, the ending snuck up on me a little.
 
1nsanilicious
2010-03-25 10:18:59 AM  

zomega: OnmyojiOmn: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.

Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.


The live action is just as tearjerking. I thought I cried when I watched the original animated version, but something about it being portrayed by real actors...gah.

Although...the opening with a relative finding the candy jar wrapped up and hidden among keepsakes at the house (and then her taking it down to an older relative, who went into massive guilt trip mode) was kinda 'what is this I don't even how does this even work?!?!'


I bought that movie the other day and watched it but it didnt make me all that sad for some reason, I think it was too slow moving. And the mother's image was too graphic and the sad was consumed by the anger at the aunt.
 
bookman
2010-03-25 10:20:17 AM  
EVERYONE and everything (except for the never-seen baddies) dies. In the last book the "hero" kills the sea by cutting it with his sword. Geston is the posterboy of absolute futility.

ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size


ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size
 
peterthx
2010-03-25 10:20:59 AM  
insidesocal.comView Full Size


And you thought you were special...
 
Architectronica
2010-03-25 10:23:45 AM  
sarahmccoy.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
Leashlaw
2010-03-25 10:24:28 AM  

sleeping martyr: That would be a great book to give to your soon-to-be ex-.

"I got this for you"
What do i need this for?
"Welcome to dumpsville, population, YOU!"


\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


I cannot get through that book without tears.
 
MysticSavage
2010-03-25 10:24:57 AM  

endtimethirtyfour: MasterThief: "Ah, Bartleby! Ah, humanity!"

/obscure?
//also very sad

I hope not re: obscure...come on, lit nerds!


I would prefer not to.
 
1nsanilicious
2010-03-25 10:24:58 AM  
That Microwave cooking book reminded me of this

Stouffers Suicide Prevention (new window)
 
wiredroach [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 10:25:55 AM  

Empty Signal Gray: This one just kills me. I mean, the guy only had one eye.


Did you get to the part yet where Sammy's comin' out of the Copa, and he sees Frank?
 
Architectronica
2010-03-25 10:27:35 AM  
bestlittlebookshelf.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
whimofsteel
2010-03-25 10:27:52 AM  

aharown: Genevieve Marie at al Speaking of reminiscing about kids' books, I love going into the kids' section of my local Border's and seeing which of my favorite books from 20-25 years ago are still popular.


bookcloseouts.com much cheaper than amazon and has lots of kids books (I stock up for my Jr. High in AL.)

and good rainy weather kids books - Tamora Pierce's series (I like the magic circle best, but all of them are good)
 
FLMountainMan
2010-03-25 10:28:53 AM  

Cagey B: eyehate

That's not even the saddest Cormac McCarthy book.


THIS. If anything, it ranks behind Horses & Suttree as one of his happier ones.
 
nosferatublue
2010-03-25 10:29:21 AM  
bookmark!
 
UncleStumpy
2010-03-25 10:30:20 AM  

sleeping martyr: That would be a great book to give to your soon-to-be ex-.

"I got this for you"
What do i need this for?
"Welcome to dumpsville, population, YOU!"


\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


Yeah that's a great book. Makes me miss my parents.
 
lake_huron
2010-03-25 10:31:10 AM  
Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?
sommerreading.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
shastacola
2010-03-25 10:35:21 AM  

Mija: EighthundredmillionthFarker: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

/hid book on shelf as well


My son came running in the front door one night. He ran to his room, locked the door and I could hear him throwing up and gagging. I asked him what was wrong. He said nothing. After a while all sound died and he wouldn't answer me. I thought, oh my gosh he has taken some drug or something and is laying dead on the bathroom floor. I MUST SAVE HIM! So I went outside, pried his window open, crawled in (fell in head first actually because the window was so high) and found him praying to the porcelain gods. He was like, "Mom, get out. I'm just drunk and I have to work tomorrow. I'm trying to get the alcohol out of my stomach. How did you get in my room?!"

/cool story, mom

I did buy this book for my son when he was younger. I signed it and put it away till he has his first child. Then he will understand my crazy love for him.


I would have kicked in the door after calling 911. Unfortunately, my gig as the mother of a minor was filled with uncontrollable hysteria a good part of the time.
 
Joce678
2010-03-25 10:36:23 AM  
babble.comView Full Size


Oh dear, surely not ... surely some editor must have noticed.

/Reading the amazon.com reviews
 
Farkwaddle
2010-03-25 10:38:01 AM  

lake_huron: Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?


Eh. That was probably one of the first books I read regarding the circle of life. I never got emotionally attached to Charlotte, so when she kicked the bucket it wasn't devastating for me. Now, if Wilbur had been flayed into bacon I probably would have lost it. As much as I love me some fatty, bacony goodness, I don't want to know that it was a pet and had a name.
 
UncleStumpy
2010-03-25 10:38:32 AM  

Chuck Ruffcorn: I found something sad at work that might make a good book title...

Pediatric Cadaver Bag.

/sigh


good band name too
 
AnotherBluesStringer [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 10:40:17 AM  
gilwilson.comView Full Size


Had to read it in high school. Hid my knives, ropes, and razors that week.
 
Scurvy Dog
2010-03-25 10:45:02 AM  

Farkwaddle: lake_huron: Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?

Eh. That was probably one of the first books I read regarding the circle of life. I never got emotionally attached to Charlotte, so when she kicked the bucket it wasn't devastating for me. Now, if Wilbur had been flayed into bacon I probably would have lost it. As much as I love me some fatty, bacony goodness, I don't want to know that it was a pet and had a name.


I know a family that raises rabbits to sell as pets. Sometimes they keep some of them. However, one rabbit they kept was kind of mean to them and to their other rabbits - so they killed and ate him.
 
HumbleGenius
2010-03-25 10:47:51 AM  

Scurvy Dog:

I know a family that raises rabbits to sell as pets. Sometimes they keep some of them. However, one rabbit they kept was kind of mean to them and to their other rabbits - so they killed and ate him.


Rabbit tastes best with a little spite.
 
sadbad
2010-03-25 10:49:53 AM  

Farkwaddle: My list (in no particular order):
A Seperate Piece


The only thing sad about that book is how farking terrible it is.
 
artifex
2010-03-25 10:57:39 AM  
Oh, this is a kids' story thread, now?
Okay. Save this copypasta for the holidays & remember it whenever you hear the song.


THE HUNCHBACK
by Alan Edward

There was just one gas-lamp, on the street corner. It had been lit no more than an hour past, but already the snow was beginning to cover it, like a great night-cap, funnelling its yellow light to a dim puddle on the pavement. It was only six in the evening, and within a mile of St Paul's, but it was the darkest time of year, and as the homegoing cabs, carriages and hansoms from the City clattered past, the link-boys were all out, running ahead of the carriages, their torches streaming flame and smoke, their nimble bodies flitting through the traffic like dragonflies. There were a few lamps in the houses, but the firelight shone from between several shutters, because the night was bitter, and freezing fog was beginning to drift up from the river, making the passers-by muffle up heavily against the bitter cold, speeding them on their way homewards.

Amid the hubbub, very few could hear the singer who stood in a broad doorway near the lamp, half-dwarfed by its heavy lintels. He was barefoot, in rags -- a shredded jacket, tattered trousers -- and he was a degree thinner than any twelve-year-old boy should be, even an unwashed urchin like this. A cap was on the ground in front of him. Most people, already late because of the snow, pushed past unheeding, but not all. Some lingered, some raised their eyebrows in slight surprise, and some few -- but very few -- dropped a coin in the boy's cap.

Because the urchin's singing was strangely sweet and tuneful, even as heard through the rattle of the carts and the clangour, now, of the church bells. But those who lingered would soon pass on impatiently as the small body was racked with yet another coughing spell, as the boy stooped and clutched his narrow chest, as again the song broke up and died.

Then one passer-by paused for a little longer than the others. The boy had been concentrating on his songs but, in a moment or two, becoming gradually aware of his companion, he turned and looked at him curiously.

It was a lad only a little older than himself. One he hadn't seen in the street before, one with tumbled fair hair and strangely bright eyes. He wore a heavy cloak.

He smiled at the urchin. "Will you sing that one again?"

The smaller boy looked at him thoughtfully. The newcomer didn't look like he had any money -- but then friendliness was rare on the street.

"Awright, then!"

The youngster took a deep breath and began again...

Ave Maria, gratia plena...

Then, after a few lines, he once more started coughing, his thin body shaking, doubled up; he gasped for breath, croaked, whooped. This happened more often now.

"Sorry," he said weakly after a moment.

"Don't be," said the other boy. "That was... beautiful. What's your name?"

"My name's Sam, Master..."

"Master no-one. I'm Michael. Mike."

Then Mike said, "Here -- sit down for a minute -- back a bit, it's more sheltered."

The snow was not yet lying between the massive door-pillars; the two boys sat on the step and Mike reached into the depths of his cloak. "It's not much but -- here."

Sam's eyes lit up. "Cor!" Just bread and a wedge of cheese -- but the half-starved urchin's mouth watered even at the sight of it. He hesitated as the other boy held it out. "You sure?"

"Yes -- take it all. I've had plenty." Then, after a moment or two, Mike asked curiously, "Where did you learn that song?"

"There," said the urchin indistinctly, nodding towards the church on the corner. He swallowed, then said, "I always sits in the porch when the choir sings. They 'ave the stove on, and a bit of heat gets out. An' I hear the singing -- it's wizard."

He looked at Mike. "An' I see the boys in the choir sometimes, in their white robes an' all. Coo, I think, they must all be really rich, have big houses like palaces, beautiful mothers, lots of toys an' so on, jus' like a dream it must be."

"Hmm -- maybe," said Mike doubtfully.

The youngster went on. "I asked once if I could sing with them, but the vicar said they din't want no ragged kids. Then the bloomin' sexton chased me after that every time I tried to sit in the warm. Eh, what's that?"

Mike had turned his head away and had muttered something, it seemed angrily, but now he said, "It doesn't matter."

"Anyways," Sam went on, "I still listened, and they sing that song more'n any -- I learnt it by heart. Don't 'arf like it."

Mike said quietly, "Yes, so do I. It was written by a brilliant young man in a country called Austria, a very long way from here."

"I dunno about nothing like that," said the urchin, munching again. "Ain't never been to school, see."

"But you like singing?"

"Not 'arf," said Sam again.

The bread and the cheese finished, Sam started to sing quietly again, but in a moment or two he started shivering, then coughing once more. Mike put his cloak round both of them and pulled the younger boy in against himself. "Better?"

"Yes, thanks, Mike."

In a few moments Sam stopped shivering.

"I'm awright now," he said, and Mike gently drew the cloak round himself again, then stood up. "You want to sing some more?"

The youngster coughed, half-retched. "Don't think I can, Mike."

"Oh yes, you can."

Sam, his attention caught by something new in Mike's tone, turned to look at him, then his mouth fell open in dismay. Now that his new friend was standing, he could see that under his cloak was a hump, an enormous hump that pushed his heavy robe back, and his body forward.

Then, as if realising that he was staring, he said, "Oh, sorry." Then with awkward sympathy, "Rough luck, Mike."

Mike laughed. "Oh, don't be sorry. Look."

Slowly, he began to remove his robe. The hump seemed to get bigger and bigger; it rose behind Mike's head, spread out on both sides.

The urchin had stood. There was light in his eyes, then on all of his face.

"Cor!!" he breathed at length. "Cor!!!" Then he started coughing again, doubling up, convulsing and whooping as if it would never stop.

But he did, and then the other boy put a hand on his shoulder. He asked quietly, "Will you come with me now?"

The urchin, his face still bathed in the pure light, looked up at him.

"Yes, Oh, yes," he whispered.

"Come on, then," said Mike quietly. "It's not as far as you think, though it's very dark. But take my hand, I know the way."

They walked together down the pavement and into a long alley beyond it, Mike's strong fingers entwined with Sam's. And at the end of the long alley the snow, the mist and the darkness took them.

Next morning, when two parish constables came on early patrol, one of them stumbled over what at first looked like a bundle of old clothes on the pavement. But it was the small singer, cold and lifeless.

"Oh, Gawd," groaned one of them. "Not another one. Well... call the cart, Harry."

The other looked down, shaking his head thoughtfully. "Yes, I remember 'im, bit of a card as I recall. But the cold was getting to 'im in the end, talking a lot of nonsense 'e was."

"Look," said his colleague, stooping and then standing up again. From beside the dead boy he had picked something up.

A feather.

A white feather -- larger, whiter and more beautiful than either of them had ever seen.

For a moment or two the constable who held it stared, was totally silent.

Then, quickly, he crushed it in his hand and threw it into the pile of rubbish in the doorway.

"Bloody brats," he muttered. "Come on, let's get this pavement tidied up."
 
Whiskey Dickens
2010-03-25 10:57:43 AM  
It's a toss-up between:

gospelgifs.comView Full Size


And:

kellylowenstein.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
MentalMoment
2010-03-25 10:57:47 AM  
content.internetvideoarchive.comView Full Size
 
omris
2010-03-25 10:58:07 AM  
It's a different kind of sad, but I couldn't read "Strength in What Remains" by Tracy Kidder in public. Apparently the book was dusty, and it got in my eyes.

Also, I'm buying a copy of this book on spec for the next time I need to break up with someone.

I usually just give them a copy of the Scottish Buddhist Cookbook (new window), which begins with a list of 11 demandments, including, "Materialism is lame. It sucks, and it uses up your beer budget."
 
yukichigai
2010-03-25 11:01:43 AM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


I'd never read that book, so I looked up on Wikipedia..

...Jesus, even the short plot summary made me tear up a little. Damn.

/Why yes, I did get a little dust in my eye watching Jurassic Bark.
 
Jaws_Victim
2010-03-25 11:09:30 AM  

lake_huron: Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?


Ending? What got me is the line "No one was with her when she died."
 
llamasarefunny
2010-03-25 11:11:24 AM  

w33dlyw33dly: Quark_Quasar: illicit: illicit: Well, two things:
1. I was forced to read it in school. That didn't help.
2. I hate super ambiguous endings. I prefer books with closure that don't feel like the author forgot to mail the last 3 pages to the publisher.

Don't ever read The Dark Tower series by Stephen King.

Don't you do it.

Wait, that WAS closure; I felt that it ended the only way it could have while remaining true to the plot. I mean, there was no ambiguity in that Roland's plight was clearly going to continue in a fixed and unpleasant way.


I agree about it being the only way it could end... I think I bawled through the last book and a half though.

As far as kids books there was one I read and I can't remember the name but it was a brother and a sister who adopted some big cat cubs (leopards? I don't know)... it was pretty awful.
 
Farkwaddle
2010-03-25 11:12:31 AM  

HumbleGenius: Scurvy Dog:

I know a family that raises rabbits to sell as pets. Sometimes they keep some of them. However, one rabbit they kept was kind of mean to them and to their other rabbits - so they killed and ate him.


I don't think I would have so much of an issue with rabbit. Had a mean one when I was younger that liked to bite. We set him free in field because no one really knew how to field dress it.
 
japlemon
2010-03-25 11:13:34 AM  

Genevieve Marie: Jeff God of Biscuits: That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.

Ooh, that one is sad. Mine though is Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes. WHY DID WE DROP THE ATOM BOMB WHYYYYYY


ummmmm....to help put an end the bloodiest war in history and prevent a land invasion of Japan, thus saving millions of lives in the process while stoping an emperialist force bent on world conquest? Maybe?

The bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki were titty twisters compared to what the Japanese did to the Chinese in Nanking, for example

Link (new window)

/and Red Fern Grows was the saddest book ever
 
LordSunder
2010-03-25 11:16:39 AM  
Tachikoma

aquanoir.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


Agreed.
 
Chicken Terminator
2010-03-25 11:18:51 AM  
I'm surprised I don't have this one. My grandmother decided I should be married and started sending me all kinds of cooking for 1 cookbooks to guilt me into doing the 'proper' thing. A new one showed up every other week. For pete's sake lady I was 22. Then again she was from the same side of the family as my aunt who said, "why are you going to college? you're a pretty girl you could get married"

Oh, and sad book not yet mentioned - A Dog Called Kitty
I was about 7 in the backseat sobbing, having trouble reading through the tears. Mom said if you read it out loud it might make it easier. The whole car ended up in tears. First time I saw my dad cry.
 
artifex
2010-03-25 11:19:54 AM  

Farkwaddle: HumbleGenius: Scurvy Dog:

I know a family that raises rabbits to sell as pets. Sometimes they keep some of them. However, one rabbit they kept was kind of mean to them and to their other rabbits - so they killed and ate him.

I don't think I would have so much of an issue with rabbit. Had a mean one when I was younger that liked to bite. We set him free in field because no one really knew how to field dress it.


Who knows what kind of garbage is in commercial rabbit food, though? Pet food will always be one more reason not to eat pets.
 
iollow
2010-03-25 11:20:00 AM  
upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size
 
improvius
2010-03-25 11:20:44 AM  

Archmage of Mampang: into the valley of death, rode the six hundred...


Another vote for When the Wind Blows. The soundtrack for the film is pretty good, too.
 
up2nfg
2010-03-25 11:27:17 AM  

Jimmy Devil Rocket Science: "For sale: Baby shoes, never used."


Traveling around yrs ago I found this American Indian shop in S. Dakota. Inside a glass case were these tiny suede moccasins with the most detailed bead work I'd ever seen on the bottoms. I said wow those are beautiful but when the baby starts walking aren't those beads going to get all ruined? And the guy says, o those are burial moccasins.
 
2KanZam
2010-03-25 11:31:06 AM  

Tachikoma: lobootomy: Notes Left Behind. (new window)

I farking DARE you not to cry, even if you don't have children. As an added bonus, here's a two page article that summarizes the dad's feelings as his daughter died within a six month period:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/33505113/ns/today-today_books/ (new window)

And that little girl kept leaving notes, even once the tumor affected her brain so much she couldn't write a coherent sentence. fark, I'm tearing up just thinking about it.

I remember that!

My mother did the same thing while she was dying, and I ended up finding her last note after I moved away to college several years later (it was tucked away in a book she had loved). I still have the note, but every time I even look at it I start bawling like a little baby again.

/I really should send a copy to my little brother
//but I just can't bring myself to
///I remember his reaction to the 5th season of Buffy, and I don't want to do that to him again



My mother kinda did the same, except I believe it was more hypergraphia (sp?) caused by brain damage from the Chemo and Radiation.

She also got VERY artistic, although few projects were finished before she got distracted with something else. I saw on TLC or something about people with severe brain damage but it made them hyper-creative. (destroyed alot of the brain around the creative centers)

I don't think it was so much "Hi from Beyond" as much as it was "when I'm gone, you'll need help with this....."She would put note on EVERYTHING....She past 8 years ago but still to this day I'll find stuff at my house or my Dad's that has her notes on it....often written in gold ink and barely legible or making sense.

We sometimes still laugh about the time my sisters and I came home from College and our dog was covered in post-it notes from mom!!

I do wish I could read the recipe for her bran muffins she wrote me just before she died...
 
mortimer_ford
2010-03-25 11:36:25 AM  

Chuck Ruffcorn: I found something sad at work that might make a good book title death metal song...

Pediatric Cadaver Bag.

/sigh
 
pheed
2010-03-25 11:36:38 AM  

OnmyojiOmn: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.

Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.


You people are pussies. I had the same experience. I had read (on Fark) how great/depressing the movie was so I rented it. I found it to be a sad story, but not depressing. The (English) voice acting was so bad, it wasn't emotionally moving at all. In fact I was more annoyed by the long-drawn out whimpering and scenes of starvation. That movie - like pretty much all anime - sucked hard.
 
SMX
2010-03-25 11:46:46 AM  

DaintySavage: Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again


I find that you can watch the episode and then just skip over the end. You may get a bit teary eyed knowing what is happening but at least you don't need to watch it.

/I'm walking on sunshiiiiiiine. WooooooAAAAAH
 
alaskan gold digger
2010-03-25 11:46:46 AM  
Dang- this thread makes me want to crawl back in bed and try again tomorrow.

Some great books though! My amazon list grows ever longer...

Re: The Giving Tree
I always thought this book ended on a positive note? Was the tree not happy to have given all it to help this boy succeed? I always thought this story was about the satisfaction of altruistic behavior, and not so much about loss (although true altruism requires no satisfaction). Or maybe this was the spin my parents put on it for me?

Re: Oldboy and Korean movies
Great Movie! From a technical standpoint and a story standpoint. After watching Oldboy I went into a bit of a Korean movie downward spiral (thanks, Netflix). Bittersweet Life, the Vengeance series, and The Host these are a few that come to mind. All show facets of the Korean psyche. However, the most powerful Korean film for me is Tae Guk Gi (brotherhood of war). This movie really brings it into focus- the Korean culture is still reeling from the pain of the Korean civil war, and stories like Oldboy are a manifestation of this. Much the same way that Japanese cinema has taken a dark turn post WW 2 and the US reconstruction (Suicide Club, Ichi the Killer, The Ring etc). Anyway, good times.
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto
2010-03-25 11:47:49 AM  

sleeping martyr: That would be a great book to give to your soon-to-be ex-.

"I got this for you"
What do i need this for?
"Welcome to dumpsville, population, YOU!"


\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


F--k you, you bastard. I'm tearing up just thinking about that.

/The Giving Tree comes in a close, close second.
 
whammer
2010-03-25 11:48:04 AM  
Mrs. Wiggs of the Cabbage Patch

http://etext.virginia.edu/toc/modeng/public/HegWigg.html

The "Drag Me To Hell" of miserable, but endlessly optimistic, American peasants.

Even "Bob" makes an appearance, to ruin their lives further.
 
Nattering Nabob
2010-03-25 11:48:09 AM  

Tanukis_Parachute: my wife and i had a full term stillbirth boy (Dylan Cole for those that care). he died two days before her was born. no reason.

in the hospital they put a card on our door. a post card size piece of paper with a leaf on it. On the leaf was a drop of water.

i read a lot of the books mentioned above like mommy, please don't cry. i can't even look at them anymore. if my any of my favorite authors came out with a book with anything like that on their covers...i wouldn't even read it. just can't.


13 years and it can still sting like yesterday.


I hope you had other children. Anyone affected that way should make a good parent. Too many just don't care...
 
Hawthorne Wingnut
2010-03-25 11:51:12 AM  
psww.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


patriki.comView Full Size
 
nathancipher
2010-03-25 11:52:15 AM  
[image from upload.wikimedia.org too old to be available]

/no one?
//so hot
 
alaskan gold digger
2010-03-25 11:54:05 AM  
Enough sadness, how about some happy stories from my childhood, damnit!
incalculable.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

img.allposters.comView Full Size

There, now don't you feel better?
 
mofomisfit
2010-03-25 11:54:21 AM  

SMX: DaintySavage: Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again

I find that you can watch the episode and then just skip over the end. You may get a bit teary eyed knowing what is happening but at least you don't need to watch it.

/I'm walking on sunshiiiiiiine. WooooooAAAAAH


But if you've seen Bender's Big Score you know that the dog's not just waiting for Fry the entire time, he's hanging out while Fry's being a marine biologist.
 
afillak
2010-03-25 11:57:32 AM  
How can we be this far into the thread and no one brings up the classics? The Little Mermaid? The Little Match Girl? THE FIR TREE?
Oh, how I cried that Christmas.
 
Slughead42
2010-03-25 11:59:33 AM  
C'mon, no love at all for "The Cold Equations"? (link pops)

/I know, I know...it's not a book
//but it's IN a book!
///slashies!
 
No Such Agency
2010-03-25 12:01:11 PM  
artifex:
Oh, this is a kids' story thread, now?
Okay. Save this copypasta for the holidays & remember it whenever you hear the song.


THE HUNCHBACK
by Alan Edward

There was just one gas-lamp, on the street corner. It had been lit no more than an hour past, but already the snow was beginning to cover it, like a great night-cap, funnelling its yellow light to a dim puddle on the pavement. It was only six in the evening, and within a mile of St Paul's, but it was the darkest time of year, and as the homegoing cabs, carriages and hansoms from the City clattered past, the link-boys were all out, running ahead of the carriages, their torches streaming flame and smoke, their nimble bodies flitting through the traffic like dragonflies. There were a few lamps in the houses, but the firelight shone from between several shutters, because the night was bitter, and freezing fog was beginning to drift up from the river, making the passers-by muffle up heavily against the bitter cold, speeding them on their way homewards.

Amid the hubbub, very few could hear the singer who stood in a broad doorway near the lamp, half-dwarfed by its heavy lintels. He was barefoot, in rags -- a shredded jacket, tattered trousers -- and he was a degree thinner than any twelve-year-old boy should be, even an unwashed urchin like this. A cap was on the ground in front of him. Most people, already late because of the snow, pushed past unheeding, but not all. Some lingered, some raised their eyebrows in slight surprise, and some few -- but very few -- dropped a coin in the boy's cap.

Because the urchin's singing was strangely sweet and tuneful, even as heard through the rattle of the carts and the clangour, now, of the church bells. But those who lingered would soon pass on impatiently as the small body was racked with yet another coughing spell, as the boy stooped and clutched his narrow chest, as again the song broke up and died.

Then one passer-by paused for a little longer than the others. The boy had been concentrating on his songs but, in a moment or two, becoming gradually aware of his companion, he turned and looked at him curiously.

It was a lad only a little older than himself. One he hadn't seen in the street before, one with tumbled fair hair and strangely bright eyes. He wore a heavy cloak.

He smiled at the urchin. "Will you sing that one again?"

The smaller boy looked at him thoughtfully. The newcomer didn't look like he had any money -- but then friendliness was rare on the street.

"Awright, then!"

The youngster took a deep breath and began again...

Ave Maria, gratia plena...

Then, after a few lines, he once more started coughing, his thin body shaking, doubled up; he gasped for breath, croaked, whooped. This happened more often now.

"Sorry," he said weakly after a moment.

"Don't be," said the other boy. "That was... beautiful. What's your name?"

"My name's Sam, Master..."

"Master no-one. I'm Michael. Mike."

Then Mike said, "Here -- sit down for a minute -- back a bit, it's more sheltered."

The snow was not yet lying between the massive door-pillars; the two boys sat on the step and Mike reached into the depths of his cloak. "It's not much but -- here."

Sam's eyes lit up. "Cor!" Just bread and a wedge of cheese -- but the half-starved urchin's mouth watered even at the sight of it. He hesitated as the other boy held it out. "You sure?"

"Yes -- take it all. I've had plenty." Then, after a moment or two, Mike asked curiously, "Where did you learn that song?"

"There," said the urchin indistinctly, nodding towards the church on the corner. He swallowed, then said, "I always sits in the porch when the choir sings. They 'ave the stove on, and a bit of heat gets out. An' I hear the singing -- it's wizard."

He looked at Mike. "An' I see the boys in the choir sometimes, in their white robes an' all. Coo, I think, they must all be really rich, have big houses like palaces, beautiful mothers, lots of toys an' so on, jus' like a dream it must be."

"Hmm -- maybe," said Mike doubtfully.

The youngster went on. "I asked once if I could sing with them, but the vicar said they din't want no ragged kids. Then the bloomin' sexton chased me after that every time I tried to sit in the warm. Eh, what's that?"

Mike had turned his head away and had muttered something, it seemed angrily, but now he said, "It doesn't matter."

"Anyways," Sam went on, "I still listened, and they sing that song more'n any -- I learnt it by heart. Don't 'arf like it."

Mike said quietly, "Yes, so do I. It was written by a brilliant young man in a country called Austria, a very long way from here."

"I dunno about nothing like that," said the urchin, munching again. "Ain't never been to school, see."

"But you like singing?"

"Not 'arf," said Sam again.

The bread and the cheese finished, Sam started to sing quietly again, but in a moment or two he started shivering, then coughing once more. Mike put his cloak round both of them and pulled the younger boy in against himself. "Better?"

"Yes, thanks, Mike."

In a few moments Sam stopped shivering.

"I'm awright now," he said, and Mike gently drew the cloak round himself again, then stood up. "You want to sing some more?"

The youngster coughed, half-retched. "Don't think I can, Mike."

"Oh yes, you can."

Sam, his attention caught by something new in Mike's tone, turned to look at him, then his mouth fell open in dismay. Now that his new friend was standing, he could see that under his cloak was a hump, an enormous hump that pushed his heavy robe back, and his body forward.

Then, as if realising that he was staring, he said, "Oh, sorry." Then with awkward sympathy, "Rough luck, Mike."

Mike laughed. "Oh, don't be sorry. Look."

Slowly, he began to remove his robe. The hump seemed to get bigger and bigger; it rose behind Mike's head, spread out on both sides.

The urchin had stood. There was light in his eyes, then on all of his face.

"Cor!!" he breathed at length. "Cor!!!" Then he started coughing again, doubling up, convulsing and whooping as if it would never stop.

But he did, and then the other boy put a hand on his shoulder. He asked quietly, "Will you come with me now?"

The urchin, his face still bathed in the pure light, looked up at him.

"Yes, Oh, yes," he whispered.

"Come on, then," said Mike quietly. "It's not as far as you think, though it's very dark. But take my hand, I know the way."

They walked together down the pavement and into a long alley beyond it, Mike's strong fingers entwined with Sam's. And at the end of the long alley the snow, the mist and the darkness took them.

Next morning, when two parish constables came on early patrol, one of them stumbled over what at first looked like a bundle of old clothes on the pavement. But it was the small singer, cold and lifeless.

"Oh, Gawd," groaned one of them. "Not another one. Well... call the cart, Harry."

The other looked down, shaking his head thoughtfully. "Yes, I remember 'im, bit of a card as I recall. But the cold was getting to 'im in the end, talking a lot of nonsense 'e was."

"Look," said his colleague, stooping and then standing up again. From beside the dead boy he had picked something up.

A feather.

A white feather -- larger, whiter and more beautiful than either of them had ever seen.

For a moment or two the constable who held it stared, was totally silent.

Then, quickly, he crushed it in his hand and threw it into the pile of rubbish in the doorway.

"Bloody brats," he muttered. "Come on, let's get this pavement tidied up." He whistled for a cab, and when it came near, the license plate said "FRESH" and it had dice on the mirror.
 
melonpocky
2010-03-25 12:01:53 PM  
Years ago a boyfriend of mine lightheartedly suggested "Hey, since your mom is Japanese you should have her watch Grave of the Fireflies. It's sad, but it's really good. She might appreciate it."

I really should have punched him in the mouth because my mother was born just outside Tokyo in 1943. That, and she really really hates sad stuff. I have tried to advise her against watching Kurosawa films but they're the only Japanese-language movies at the public library.

I, to this day, still haven't seen Grave of the Fireflies. I guess the aversion to sad things is genetic because I can't bring myself to do it. I idly picked up my dad's Hugo Winners short story collection a couple years back and read "Flowers for Algernon." Okay, I had read the novel as a kid but holy crap I don't think I have ever read a short story through such blurred eyes. I hurt thinking about it.

Also, has anyone read The Pigman? My dad made me read that when I was very young and it's haunted me ever since. I hate the thought of being old, alone, and exploited.
 
Robot Devil's Advocate
2010-03-25 12:02:57 PM  

DaintySavage: Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again


I always thought "Luck of the Fryrish" was much sadder.

Also, the year my Mom gave "Love You Forever" to both my brother and I for Christmas (maybe 3 or 4 years ago, meaning I was 24 and my brother 29) was to the day the time I started locking my windows in my apartment. Creepy book is creepy.
 
StrangeQ
2010-03-25 12:03:46 PM  

OnmyojiOmn: Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?


Dammit I'm at work, now something's in my eye, gotta go blow my nose..
 
namegoeshere [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 12:06:38 PM  

nathancipher: /no one?


Velveteen Rabbit

I waited the entire thread to post this. My stuffed animals were my FAMILY! And you want me to read a book about burning that poor rabbit?? And how that rabbit can never, ever, ever go home?? And being "real" will probablly end up squashed on the side of the road, or dismembered and disembowled like the one the dog left on our back porch??

Then, picture six year old Namegoeshere being diagnosed with Scarlet Fever (by then completely, easily curable, BTW). And then watch the look on my parents' and the doctor's faces as I become hysterical and need to be restrained, wanting only to race home and save my beloved family from the burn pile in the back yard.

They thought it was the fever...

My mother kept trying to give that evil piece of trash to my kids. Sorry mom. Never going to happen.
 
ElusiveKismet
2010-03-25 12:06:55 PM  
Glad to see this post have lowered the levels of testosterone! Something very hot about mildly emotional men.

/c'mere let me wipe yer man tears!
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto
2010-03-25 12:08:41 PM  

pheed: You people are pussies. I had the same experience. I had read (on Fark) how great/depressing the movie was so I rented it. I found it to be a sad story, but not depressing. The (English) voice acting was so bad, it wasn't emotionally moving at all. In fact I was more annoyed by the long-drawn out whimpering and scenes of starvation. That movie - like pretty much all anime - sucked hard.


I feel the same way. There's a few anime movies that I do enjoy, but compared to the number my former roommate subjected me to...

Now Dancer in the Dark, that's a freaking depressing movie. Watched it with 4 guys and 1 girl in college. Every. single. person. had tears at the end of it, and we all kind of got up without talking and left. Haven't watched it since, even though it's a damn good movie and I have the soundtrack...
 
StreetlightInTheGhetto
2010-03-25 12:11:01 PM  

namegoeshere: nathancipher: /no one?


Velveteen Rabbit

I waited the entire thread to post this. My stuffed animals were my FAMILY! And you want me to read a book about burning that poor rabbit?? And how that rabbit can never, ever, ever go home?? And being "real" will probablly end up squashed on the side of the road, or dismembered and disembowled like the one the dog left on our back porch??

Then, picture six year old Namegoeshere being diagnosed with Scarlet Fever (by then completely, easily curable, BTW). And then watch the look on my parents' and the doctor's faces as I become hysterical and need to be restrained, wanting only to race home and save my beloved family from the burn pile in the back yard.

They thought it was the fever...

My mother kept trying to give that evil piece of trash to my kids. Sorry mom. Never going to happen.


Oh my god.

Wow.

I mean, that book saddened the hell out of me, but also made me kind of angry at the whole stupid situation...
 
namegoeshere [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 12:12:26 PM  
Just read Thirteen Reasons Why (new window).

It isn't the saddest I've ever read, but it is intense.

I'm looking for one along the same lines as Cut. (new window)

Anybody?
 
Grand Poohbah
2010-03-25 12:13:10 PM  
Good thread. My contribution:

i86.photobucket.comView Full Size


Great book, actually.
 
EmptyLighter
2010-03-25 12:14:22 PM  

lake_huron: Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?
[Charlotte's Web Pic]


Finally, something i can agree with, after all the dead baby jokes and baww about people's mommies.
Charlotte's Web still gets me.
 
DIAF
2010-03-25 12:16:03 PM  
At the back of the North Wind.

Here's paradise, kid. You gotta die to get in.
 
talulahgosh
2010-03-25 12:16:48 PM  
my two cents on the road and on haruki murakami:

the road was boring and not sad. sorry, but i couldn't even finish it. i skimmed through to the end and was unimpressed.

murakami: started with the wind-up bird chronicles and again am bored. maybe his/her other books are better, but this is dull. read kobo abe for better stuff.

first book to make me cry and realize life sucks is the outsiders.
saddest books are by hubert selby. nothing is sadder than requiem for a dream. and i've read all of his other books, which are heartbreaking.
 
evaned
2010-03-25 12:21:06 PM  
Architectronica [picture of "The Things They Carried"]:

That is an excellent book.
 
schnarff
2010-03-25 12:21:59 PM  
heatherlo.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


Surprised no one's mentioned this.

Haven't actually read it myself - my wife had to for an international relations class, and it had her depressed for a month after she read it. I've avoided it like the plague as a result.
 
afillak
2010-03-25 12:22:51 PM  

OnmyojiOmn: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Menstrual Cyclist: Tachikoma: or [Grave of the Fireflies]

I can't watch that movie to this day. And I have an irrational hatred of fireflies as well...

I gave that movie a try due to all the recommendations I've heard on TotalFark.

I heard that it was a crusher of a movie.

I had no idea.

Damn and a half, it took the wind outta my sails for a long chunk of time.

Saddest movie ever. Farkers, if you see this it will be sadder than the saddest thing you've seen. I guarantee it.


Um, no.

Check out a little film called Ring Of Bright Water.
 
Norman Greenbaum
2010-03-25 12:26:40 PM  
Jeebus, I have to stop crying at work! And it doesn't helpt that "Cat's In the Cradle" is on the radio right now, either.

/college librarian
 
Ashelth
2010-03-25 12:29:41 PM  

Genevieve Marie: Bridge to Terabithia NOOOOOOO. WHY LESLIE WHY

Now I'm also thinkinging about Freak the Mighty and Number the Stars.

I have very busy and important work things tomorrow and I have to go read Hatchet to make myself feel better. Are you guys sorry yet?


Yup I remember being read that book in grade school. WTF are people thinking? Life becomes depressing enough when you grow up why the hell make it that was as a child.
 
Urinal Cake Mix
2010-03-25 12:31:33 PM  

spartan6652: This book right here, tore me up. My wife had a miscarrage too, but this whole book is full of sad.

/never saw the movie
//figured they'd just mess it up


Loved the book, the movie made me cry my face off. My fiance has never owned a dog and even he teared up when they had to put Marley down.
 
Uff_Da
2010-03-25 12:32:58 PM  

fdlgrl: Gallipoli is my favourite Sad Movie. I can't even watch the happy bits without crying for knowing the ending.


Great flick, plus I'd add Breaking the Waves.
 
poot_rootbeer
2010-03-25 12:33:22 PM  
9/24/08 NEVAR FORGET

/comparatively SFW, as far as Encyclopedia Dramatica pages go
 
Grand Poohbah
2010-03-25 12:37:39 PM  

schnarff: Surprised no one's mentioned this.

Haven't actually read it myself - my wife had to for an international relations class, and it had her depressed for a month after she read it. I've avoided it like the plague as a result.


That book made me so mad...
 
mongbiohazard [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 12:51:12 PM  
I thought THIS was the saddest book ever...

Will that Nermal never realize the suffering he puts poor Garfield through?


/came in to say "the bible"
//beaten to the punch, damn youse!
 
StaleCoffee
2010-03-25 12:51:55 PM  

artifex: Oh, this is a kids' story thread, now?
Okay. Save this copypasta for the holidays & remember it whenever you hear the song.


THE HUNCHBACK
by Alan Edward


The magnitude of obvious and cliche in this story is like a lead weight in a sock.

If the author wanted to go for sad instead of saccharine he could have the psychopomp (yon Mikey) shrug when the kid died and carried on its way to more important things, the sparrows fall noted and passed over. This was just a saccharine fairy tale, as it happened.
 
Chicken Terminator
2010-03-25 12:53:10 PM  

namegoeshere: nathancipher: /no one?


Velveteen Rabbit

I waited the entire thread to post this. My stuffed animals were my FAMILY! And you want me to read a book about burning that poor rabbit?? And how that rabbit can never, ever, ever go home?? And being "real" will probablly end up squashed on the side of the road, or dismembered and disembowled like the one the dog left on our back porch??

Then, picture six year old Namegoeshere being diagnosed with Scarlet Fever (by then completely, easily curable, BTW). And then watch the look on my parents' and the doctor's faces as I become hysterical and need to be restrained, wanting only to race home and save my beloved family from the burn pile in the back yard.

They thought it was the fever...

My mother kept trying to give that evil piece of trash to my kids. Sorry mom. Never going to happen.


Wow indeed. I felt the same way as a kid. Do you also have to leave the room during the sad song by Jessie the Cowgirl in Toy Story 2?
I did reread the Velveteen Rabbit a few hours before my husband deployed, knew I'd need to get a good cry out so I could deal with the kids at drop off without being a mess myself.
 
thefnitalian
2010-03-25 12:53:33 PM  
A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she held him, she sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

The baby grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was two years old, and he ran all around the house. He pulled all the books off the shelves. He pulled all the food out of the refrigerator and he took his mother's watch and flushed it down the toilet. Sometimes his mother would say, "this kid is driving me CRAZY!"

But at night time, when that two-year-old was quiet, she opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor, looked up over the side of his bed; and if he was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

The little boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was nine years old. And he never wanted to come in for dinner, he never wanted to take a bath, and when grandma visited he always said bad words. Sometimes his mother wanted to sell him to the zoo!

But at night time, when he was asleep, the mother quietly opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep, she picked up that nine-year-old boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

The boy grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a teenager. He had strange friends and he wore strange clothes and he listened to strange music. Sometimes the mother felt like she was in a zoo!

But at night time, when that teenager was asleep, the mother opened the door to his room, crawled across the floor and looked up over the side of the bed. If he was really asleep she picked up that great big boy and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. While she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

That teenager grew. He grew and he grew and he grew. He grew until he was a grown-up man. He left home and got a house across town. But sometimes on dark nights the mother got into her car and drove across town. If all the lights in her son's house were out, she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor, and looked up over the side of his bed. If that great big man was really asleep she picked him up and rocked him back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while she rocked him she sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.

Well, that mother, she got older. She got older and older and older. One day she called up her son and said, "You'd better come see me because I'm very old and sick." So her son came to see her. When he came in the door she tried to sing the song. She sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always...

But she couldn't finish because she was too old and sick. The son went to his mother. He picked her up and rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And he sang this song:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my Mommy you'll be.

When the son came home that night, he stood for a long time at the top of the stairs. Then he went into the room where his very new baby daughter was sleeping. He picked her up in his arms and very slowly rocked her back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. And while he rocked her he sang:

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.
 
fragglerawk
2010-03-25 12:55:58 PM  
kill John Lennon.....
 
etant_donne
2010-03-25 12:56:45 PM  

talulahgosh: my two cents on the road and on haruki murakami:

the road was boring and not sad. sorry, but i couldn't even finish it. i skimmed through to the end and was unimpressed.

murakami: started with the wind-up bird chronicles and again am bored. maybe his/her other books are better, but this is dull. read kobo abe for better stuff.

first book to make me cry and realize life sucks is the outsiders.
saddest books are by hubert selby. nothing is sadder than requiem for a dream. and i've read all of his other books, which are heartbreaking.


The road was so so...

but Murakami is great- i read lots of Kobo Abe- great stuff (and the film made from Woman in the Dunes is beautiful and oppressive- They both borrow a lot from Kafka and Nabokov... but Murakami somehow manages to instill his characters with more humanity for me, no matter how strange they are, than does Abe. Wind up Bird/ Kafka by the Shore are great novels, and are sad- but Norwegian Wood is more heartbreaking in my view.

While we are jumping media... Bergman- there is tortured and sad- yet hopeful. Watch the trilogy: Through a Glass Darkly; Winter's Light, and The Silence. Those are a rough set- yet there remains a glimmer of hope even at the end of the worst (the final breakdown of Karin at the end of Through a Glass Darkly).

/my two cents
 
MasterThief
2010-03-25 12:56:54 PM  
Recent books that have made me :(

img51.imageshack.usView Full Size


img12.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
nmrsnr [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2010-03-25 01:07:32 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: pheed: You people are pussies. I had the same experience. I had read (on Fark) how great/depressing the movie was so I rented it. I found it to be a sad story, but not depressing. The (English) voice acting was so bad, it wasn't emotionally moving at all. In fact I was more annoyed by the long-drawn out whimpering and scenes of starvation. That movie - like pretty much all anime - sucked hard.

I feel the same way. There's a few anime movies that I do enjoy, but compared to the number my former roommate subjected me to...

Now Dancer in the Dark, that's a freaking depressing movie. Watched it with 4 guys and 1 girl in college. Every. single. person. had tears at the end of it, and we all kind of got up without talking and left. Haven't watched it since, even though it's a damn good movie and I have the soundtrack...


We had to watch Dancer in the Dark during a high school assembly (I went to a weird school), what I remember most about the movie was (Warning: Spoilers) in the scene where Bjork attacks David Morse with the suitcase, after she bludgeons him for the fourth or fifth time someone just started laughing. Once that happened the scene went from shocking to hilarious as she kept bashing away. Half of the students were cracking up while the other half were bawling. It was kind of surreal.

/cool story, bro.
 
lilacjive
2010-03-25 01:16:50 PM  
I had to read the plot summary of Bridge to Terabithia since it's been years since I read it, and now I'm sad all over again.

When they made that into a movie, and made it look like Narnia, I couldn't believe it. I thought a lot of parents would be super pissed when they came out of the theater.

Of course, I was right.
 
afillak
2010-03-25 01:17:14 PM  
Sati, anyone?
 
Arbiter of Cool
2010-03-25 01:19:11 PM  
Grave of the Fireflies is awesomely sad. I would also recommend Barefoot Gen. I think it was a little sadder, but they are very close.

For Korean sadness Oldboy is only matched by Park's first vengance movie. Sympathy for Mr. Revenge is so much sadder a movie. Not as violent or dark by any means, but it is so sad. You have to feel sad for the 'villain' as much as the 'hero'.
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 01:19:15 PM  

thefnitalian: she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor


I have to admit that I never rad that story until today.

And I have to agree with the other Farkers that see this more as creepy than sad.

Yes it's got the growing old and the between-the-lines context that the mother died cycle of life thing, but seriously... the creepy factor is overwhelming.

I have children and even now as they are all teenagers, they are my babies and I remind them that no matter how old they are, they will always be my babies... and yes, I hug them and even rock them on my lap at times as I see them growing up so fast.

But holy crap, to sneak in their houses through a window to rock them in their beds...?


o.O

/ seriously... o.O
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 01:20:40 PM  

imfallen_angel: thefnitalian: she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor

I have to admit that I never rad read that story until today.

And I have to agree with the other Farkers that see this more as creepy than sad.

Yes it's got the growing old and the between-the-lines context that the mother died cycle of life thing, but seriously... the creepy factor is overwhelming.

I have children and even now as they are all teenagers, they are my babies and I remind them that no matter how old they are, they will always be my babies... and yes, I hug them and even rock them on my lap at times as I see them growing up so fast.

But holy crap, to sneak in their houses through a window to rock them in their beds...?


o.O

/ seriously... o.O


ftfm

/ok I'll admit that I didn't rechecked my post before posting and make a typo.
 
gund goat
2010-03-25 01:20:48 PM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


I'm really late to the party but that book is the saddest damn thing I have ever read. It is also for some reason way sadder if it's read to you. IMHO it is the second saddest thing ever next to Grave of the Fireflies
 
Infinite Monkey
2010-03-25 01:22:49 PM  
goofybeast.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
Still Itchy
2010-03-25 01:23:59 PM  
Lovecraft's The Dunwich Horror has a very sad ending.

A child screaming for help from his father...with no comfort or assistance rendered.
 
EliminateNinniesAndTwits
2010-03-25 01:24:24 PM  

japlemon: Genevieve Marie: Jeff God of Biscuits: That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.

Ooh, that one is sad. Mine though is Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes. WHY DID WE DROP THE ATOM BOMB WHYYYYYY

ummmmm....to help put an end the bloodiest war in history and prevent a land invasion of Japan, thus saving millions of lives in the process while stoping an emperialist force bent on world conquest? Maybe?

The bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki were titty twisters compared to what the Japanese did to the Chinese in Nanking, for example

Link (new window)

/and Red Fern Grows was the saddest book ever


Not only that, firebombing Tokyo caused more death and destruction than the Atom Bombs. But when the agenda is driving the comment, little things like the nauseatingly lengthy list of known Japanese atrocities and the actual bomb damage assessments don't really enter in to it.
 
letdogsvote
2010-03-25 01:24:52 PM  
For books or stories, yeah list me with the Flowers for Algernon group.

And this one always gets me for movies:

teachwithmovies.orgView Full Size
 
Doooom
2010-03-25 01:34:22 PM  
Just came in to agree with the people who said "Farewell to Arms". I knew part of what was coming, but damn. One of my favorite books of all time, but damn, Hemingway was one torturous bastard.
 
Fano
2010-03-25 01:34:37 PM  

ckellingc: Saddest Picture Ever. (new window)


He keeps resurrecting!
 
Celerian
2010-03-25 01:38:59 PM  

imfallen_angel: thefnitalian: she opened his bedroom window, crawled across the floor

I have to admit that I never rad that story until today.

And I have to agree with the other Farkers that see this more as creepy than sad.

Yes it's got the growing old and the between-the-lines context that the mother died cycle of life thing, but seriously... the creepy factor is overwhelming.

I have children and even now as they are all teenagers, they are my babies and I remind them that no matter how old they are, they will always be my babies... and yes, I hug them and even rock them on my lap at times as I see them growing up so fast.

But holy crap, to sneak in their houses through a window to rock them in their beds...?


o.O

/ seriously... o.O


I think someone else touched on the fact that its not meant to be a literal act of climbing into the window to rock a grown man in their beds. But for a child, they don't understand that would be a creepy action. To a child, the meaning is more clear that even when the baby turned into an adult, his mommy was there when he needed her. I just think you're looking too deep at a tale that's supposed to reassure a child that their parents will love them as long as they live.

Unfortunately, not all kids have this luxury. Sometimes the parents die, and sometimes one of the parents take off. A friend of mine has two children (ages 6 and 4) who are currently dealing with the latter situation. Their father has taken off twice, left their mother with all kinds of bills, they lost the apartment they were staying in, lost all their belongings, and now their father is preparing to move from Ohio to California, where he will get next to no chance to see his kids. They are just old enough to understand the basic mechanics of the situation, but its still upsetting to see.
 
thisDude
2010-03-25 01:40:47 PM  
[image from cinie.files.wordpress.com too old to be available]
 
blankwhiteboard
2010-03-25 01:47:53 PM  
untoldentertainment.comView Full Size


There... something... in... my eye..

/excuse me..
 
FarkinFarker
2010-03-25 01:56:38 PM  

Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....


img151.imageshack.usView Full Size
 
not_an_indigo
2010-03-25 01:57:20 PM  

StreetlightInTheGhetto: pheed: You people are pussies. I had the same experience. I had read (on Fark) how great/depressing the movie was so I rented it. I found it to be a sad story, but not depressing. The (English) voice acting was so bad, it wasn't emotionally moving at all. In fact I was more annoyed by the long-drawn out whimpering and scenes of starvation. That movie - like pretty much all anime - sucked hard.

I feel the same way. There's a few anime movies that I do enjoy, but compared to the number my former roommate subjected me to...

Now Dancer in the Dark, that's a freaking depressing movie. Watched it with 4 guys and 1 girl in college. Every. single. person. had tears at the end of it, and we all kind of got up without talking and left. Haven't watched it since, even though it's a damn good movie and I have the soundtrack...


I saw Dancer in the Dark a couple weeks ago. I'm only just now not farked up from it anymore.

/good movie though
 
blankwhiteboard
2010-03-25 01:58:42 PM  
thisDude

fromtheleft.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


I fixed that for you.
 
pookeywan
2010-03-25 02:01:18 PM  
Another Farker (Farkette) who looooooves The Hunger Games. I read it in 3 days; stayed up until 3AM one night because I just couldn't put it down. Got Catching Fire the next day and read it within 5 days. Now I'm counting down the days until Mockingjay comes out; reading some Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. in the meantime...
 
res ipsa dixit
2010-03-25 02:07:50 PM  

Dwight_Yeast: Abstruse: On that tray...how the hell do you make a MILKSHAKE in the farking microwave?!

Someone needs to buy this book just to answer THIS.


Using amazon's Look Inside, the beverages recipes are:
spiced apple cider,
cocoa,
cocoa and marshmallows,
Irish coffee with whipped cream,
hot orange drink, and
hot spiced wine.

If that's a cherry on top, then I don't know which one it is.
 
Dr. Poison
2010-03-25 02:09:40 PM  
[image from albums.cf.avatarsunited.com too old to be available]

Most PAINFUL book!
 
TheyCallThisWork
2010-03-25 02:13:22 PM  

pookeywan: Another Farker (Farkette) who looooooves The Hunger Games. I read it in 3 days; stayed up until 3AM one night because I just couldn't put it down. Got Catching Fire the next day and read it within 5 days. Now I'm counting down the days until Mockingjay comes out; reading some Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. in the meantime...


My fiancee is a teen librarian, and she has gotten me into a lot of cool YA fiction, lately. HG was great. Catching fire took a LONG time to get interesting but ended strong. I can't wait for Mockingjay. I think it comes out in August.

Normally, we'd have an advance copy by now, but the publisher isn't doing advance copies for book 3, dammit!!!!
 
artifex
2010-03-25 02:13:51 PM  

poot_rootbeer: 9/24/08 NEVAR FORGET

/comparatively SFW, as far as Encyclopedia Dramatica pages go


Nice, glad the "your mommy" section was in there to break the mood.
 
big pig peaches
2010-03-25 02:14:21 PM  
I am actually at home on 'paternity' leave right now for the birth of my first child so I am getting a kick out of these replies. I am glad I am not at work or else my fellow cube dwellers would see that I am having and allergy attack punctuated by the occasional bout of hysterical laughter.

Tanukis_Parachute:

I'm not really a religious guy, but I hope you find peace in someway. I can't imagine the strength one would need to even get through such a thing.

thefnitalian: I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.


That really brings tears to my eye, then again it also makes me want to send a copy of 'Microwave Cooking for One' to my mother.
 
Ludendorff's Ghost
2010-03-25 02:18:21 PM  

Ebenator: Farewell to Arms.


Oh, Fark off.

All Quiet on the Western Front.

/Moltke, you putz!
 
SMX
2010-03-25 02:23:27 PM  

mofomisfit: SMX: DaintySavage: Daroc: Oh and Ill just leave this here....

only cartoon to make me cry. ive watched it once. wont watch it again

I find that you can watch the episode and then just skip over the end. You may get a bit teary eyed knowing what is happening but at least you don't need to watch it.

/I'm walking on sunshiiiiiiine. WooooooAAAAAH

But if you've seen Bender's Big Score you know that the dog's not just waiting for Fry the entire time, he's hanging out while Fry's being a marine biologist.


Well, true. It's just hard to think of that kind of happy thought when they have the sad music playing and such a sad dog :(
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 02:25:12 PM  

Celerian: I think someone else touched on the fact that its not meant to be a literal act of climbing into the window to rock a grown man in their beds. But for a child, they don't understand that would be a creepy action. To a child, the meaning is more clear that even when the baby turned into an adult, his mommy was there when he needed her. I just think you're looking too deep at a tale that's supposed to reassure a child that their parents will love them as long as they live.

Unfortunately, not all kids have this luxury. Sometimes the parents die, and sometimes one of the parents take off. A friend of mine has two children (ages 6 and 4) who are currently dealing with the latter situation. Their father has taken off twice, left their mother with all kinds of bills, they lost the apartment they were staying in, lost all their belongings, and now their father is preparing to move from Ohio to California, where he will get next to no chance to see his kids. They are just old enough to understand the basic mechanics of the situation, but its still upsetting to see.


I understand that, but I still think that there's a lot of other ways that the author could have said it.

Even as a kid I would have looked at that climbing through the window as odd.

And sorry but I'm one of those "kids", I lost my mother at a fairly young age, and she did pass the same type of message to me before she died, and while I'm very easily touched by sad stories, that part just kills it for me, sorry.

Oh... and since you english folks don't explorer much outside your borders, you're missing "Aurore (new window)" from the list...

Based on a true story, two movie adaptation have been made, one in 2005, and the much older one from 1952. And both are worth watching.

i478.photobucket.comView Full Size



i478.photobucket.comView Full Size
 
aden07775
2010-03-25 02:29:02 PM  

Joce678: Oh dear, surely not ... surely some editor must have noticed.

/Reading the amazon.com reviews


Funny though they never do - my little sister had a Disney computer game. It was teaching language skills and would put a picture and a short two to three word sentence for her to read. The one that got me was a picture of Pooh in the water under the bridge. The caption read "Pooh floats". I didn't stop laughing for an hour. Truer words were never written.
 
big pig peaches
2010-03-25 02:30:43 PM  
I see the comments on amazon have started to pick. Anyone here know anything about that?

Link
 
Thats_Not_My_Baby
2010-03-25 02:36:52 PM  
Speaking of adolescent literature:

Does anyone remember reading a book about a poor-ish kid going to spend a summer with his rich grandfather or uncle or something and he has the time of his life right up until the grandfather or uncle turns out to be a Nazi? I remember a Jeep and an Alfa Romeo if that helps.
 
God Is My Co-Pirate
2010-03-25 02:37:32 PM  
Infinite Monkey Iron Giant pic

"Superman..."

/damn you
 
MetaRinka
2010-03-25 02:45:45 PM  
ecx.images-amazon.comView Full Size


that one does it for me, talk about a sucky childhood
 
Skullduggery
2010-03-25 02:49:40 PM  

lake_huron: Agree with Flowers for Algernon. This ending never made you cry?


Charlotte's Web! That's another one. I'd read it as a kid, of course. My sister loved the '70s cartoon movie, so I got her the book and read it aloud to her. I'll be damned if that whole chapter I wasn't a bit weepy, knowing full well what was going to happen.
 
abfalter
2010-03-25 02:49:48 PM  

coinspinner: Just to nerd this biatch up...

Only time I may have gotten something in my eye while reading a book in my adult life.

/best fantasy series. ever.


The saddest part of those books was the realization that I had wasted my money on them. I really, really want to like them. But they are just too inconsistent. Occasional awesome in a sea of relentless boring.
 
you_idiot
2010-03-25 03:08:44 PM  

NuttierThanEver: Not even close to the saddest
Mommy, Please don't cry (new window)


Argh, my heart breaks just looking at the Amazon page. Look at the "what other books people are buying"...
 
Thats_Not_My_Baby
2010-03-25 03:09:04 PM  

Thats_Not_My_Baby: Speaking of adolescent literature:

Does anyone remember reading a book about a poor-ish kid going to spend a summer with his rich grandfather or uncle or something and he has the time of his life right up until the grandfather or uncle turns out to be a Nazi? I remember a Jeep and an Alfa Romeo if that helps.



Gentlehands. Bam! Go go Google skills.
 
you_idiot
2010-03-25 03:14:14 PM  

Jeff God of Biscuits: EighthundredmillionthFarker: sleeping martyr: \for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"

I think the book is creepy... what's up with the Mom climbing into her son's window and shiat. *shudders*

How would you like that to be your mother-in-law?

/hid book on shelf as well

110% with you on this one. I read it as a child, and upon finding it in a bookstore as an adult, and re-reading it, I wonder what the hell my parents were thinking. There's a distinct "a boy's best friend is his mother" vibe to it.

That being said, my vote goes to Tuck Everlasting on Saddest Book Ever.


My sister gave us this book. She said it makes her cry. My wife said "This is soo creepy, let's never read it".

I read it to the kids sometimes, but I go "I love you forever" then make the Psycho sound. Drives my wife nuts.

It's is very sad with a touch of creepy. The book follows the mother and her baby as they grow up. She always sings him that poem. As life goes on she gets frail and one day she can't sing it anymore. The boy goes to her house and sings it to her as he cradles her. The next scene he's pausing at the top of his stairs very sad...then he goes into his baby's room and sings it to her. The cycle of creepiness continues. I should point out that as the boy grows up, the mother sneaks into his room and cuddles him while she sing the poem, including when he's older and lives across town, she drives to his house with a LADDER and climbs into his bedroom window....
 
thoreau
2010-03-25 03:15:08 PM  
katielizabethawkes: But my favorite irony is that I don't even own a microwave. What about "crappy gas-stove cooking for one"? Anyone?

First you blow out the pilot light...
 
TalbotFisher
2010-03-25 03:15:11 PM  
1. This thread has actually made me cry.
2. Jurassic Bark and Luck of the Fryish make me cry everytime.
3. I lost someone to MS, the Animal Crossing thing made me cry.
4. The titles and descriptions of the books about dealing with the loss of a child made me cry.
5. Looked up "I Love you Forever." Made me cry.


So to add a personal touch to this stupid, stupid thread... I give you this. After it made me cry.

Link (new window)
 
tokamak fanboy
2010-03-25 03:18:02 PM  
Plenty of sad books already, but for sad video games I'd have to go with
t1.gstatic.com

The worst part is, that if you've played FF7, as everyone who played Crisis Core had, you KNOW what happens in the end, but you get attached to him anyway.
 
slave2grind
2010-03-25 03:30:47 PM  

sleeping martyr:
\for the record, the saddest book ever is the Children's book "I love you forever"


wackyiraqi.comView Full Size


I agree. It had my wife and my five year old in tears.
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 03:38:27 PM  
One music video that sends chills down my back is this one, when it hits a certain point (guess where):

Najoua Belyzel - La Bienvenue (new window)

(warning: it's french and you need to understand the words and the meaning of the imagery to get what I mean)

/and yes, she's absolutely gorgeous
 
Gnaglor
2010-03-25 03:41:00 PM  
jacobnordahl.dkView Full Size
 
Voiceofreason01
2010-03-25 03:43:39 PM  

you_idiot: NuttierThanEver: Not even close to the saddest
Mommy, Please don't cry (new window)

Argh, my heart breaks just looking at the Amazon page. Look at the "what other books people are buying"...


Jesus Christ, that's last time I take your advice.

/awkward to cry at work
 
blk47rs [TotalFark]
2010-03-25 03:51:30 PM  
Saddest product ever...

Link (new window)
 
MasterPython
2010-03-25 04:04:23 PM  

SMX:
I find that you can watch the episode and then just skip over the end. You may get a bit teary eyed knowing what is happening but at least you don't need to watch it.


After seeing Bender's Big Score it's not as bad anymore.
 
angry bunny
2010-03-25 04:18:36 PM  
Dear Fark,
you hateful bastards. How dare you do this to me while I'm at work. Specifically you Mr. I'm-going-to-post-hobbes-in-a-trash-can. Yeah that's right you buddy find a fire and go ahead and jump right in it. also the post that starts "hey guys, what's going on this thread" there's a special place in hell reserved for you, child molesters, and people who talk in the theater.

Look we all need to recognize that Fark is a viscious light hearted place where we can go to feel better about ourselves by mocking others. At the very worst, when some major world event is going down fark is where you comment about the screwed up nature of this world. I'm never supposed to have a moment of introspection. I'm never supposed to feel sad.

In summary screw this thread and all who dwell within this thread.

/lost it watching "UP!" by the way.
//Pixar can also DIAF
 
imfallen_angel
2010-03-25 04:21:25 PM  

angry bunny: /lost it watching "UP!" by the way.
//Pixar can also DIAF


What about Disney, for the Lion King when the daddy lion dies?


:-D
 
vort3xxx
2010-03-25 04:31:24 PM  

angry bunny: /lost it watching "UP!" by the way.


Lost your boner?


I thought that he died last week.
 
Voiceofreason01
2010-03-25 04:45:31 PM  

angry bunny: Dear Fark,
you hateful bastards. How dare you do this to me while I'm at work. Specifically you Mr. I'm-going-to-post-hobbes-in-a-trash-can. Yeah that's right you buddy find a fire and go ahead and jump right in it. also the post that starts "hey guys, what's going on this thread" there's a special place in hell reserved for you, child molesters, and people who talk in the theater.

Look we all need to recognize that Fark is a viscious light hearted place where we can go to feel better about ourselves by mocking others. At the very worst, when some major world event is going down fark is where you comment about the screwed up nature of this world. I'm never supposed to have a moment of introspection. I'm never supposed to feel sad.

In summary screw this thread and all who dwell within this thread.

/lost it watching "UP!" by the way.
//Pixar can also DIAF


Remember that scene at the end of Harold and Maude when you see the tattoo on Maude's arm? Well that's real life, all shiney and bubbly on the outside but it's all just a veneer, a mask, underneath is pure horror.

/Have a nice day!
 
SMOIT!
2010-03-25 04:53:56 PM  
Like most things, if you catch someone in the right mood you can talk them into anything. You dirty bastards caught me in the right mood today and talked me into weeping.

I had to quit this thread several times because I simple couldn't stand to look at the screen anymore.

Good job? Sorta? I dunno..
 
majestykelf
2010-03-25 04:58:00 PM  

badhatharry: nesler: Tachikoma: dreamscapes.files.wordpress.com
or
aquanoir.files.wordpress.com

You suck a fat one. Gahhhhhhh. I haven't read Terabithia, but I saw the film. That scene was a f*cking shock, and they way they dealt with it was rather amazing. Not a great movie, but that storyline was very, very well done. And a major kick to the balls. And Fireflies... it wasn't heartbreaking, because the dread was there from the beginning. You go in knowing that you're going to watch everything fall apart.

Another book that captures the whole dread thing quite nicely is The Sparrow, by Mary Doria Russell.


And f*ck all of you for bringing up The Giving Tree.

I am reading that one right now. Thanks for not giving any spoilers.


I stepped right into the whole Bridge to Terabithia thing with no warning, and it completely devastated me. In my youth I lived through a scenario way too close to the death of the girl, and I couldn't deal with it. I spent a couple of months reassuring myself that the actress that played the girl was still alive and okay.
 
fireandashes36
2010-03-25 05:11:13 PM  

yogaFLAME: Where the Red Fern Grows. To this day I bear an irrational hatred for mountain lions.


this.
 
Urinal Gum
2010-03-25 05:33:54 PM  
The site is blocked at work, so I have no idea what any of you are talking about. I can only assume that you are all totally wrong about your opinions.

/this book is a different kind of sad