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(observer-reporter.com)   Lawyer who sent bills for 25-hour workdays blames brain fart   ( hoosiertimes.com) divider line
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9916 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Apr 2003 at 2:46 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

139 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-04-28 02:48:34 PM  
hehe fart....

I got nothing
2003-04-28 02:49:56 PM  
Damn daylight savings time.
2003-04-28 02:51:26 PM  
The first time I've heard anyone use the term 'brain fart' was then a couple kids murdered their teacher. Ooops! We're sorry!

Idiots. I guess the generation of kids who used 'brain farts' to describe their stupidity grew up to be lawyers.
2003-04-28 02:51:50 PM  
It was more like an "Oops I got caught fart"
2003-04-28 02:51:54 PM  
Clearly he was billing according to time on his homeworld of 34 T-Tauri Beta 4, on which days are variable depending upon the position of the trinary system.

2003-04-28 02:52:28 PM  
$140 PER HOUR! Prostitutes make less than that and they can screw people a lot better than a lawyer could.

2003-04-28 02:52:53 PM  
< Steven Wright Joke >

I went down the street to the 24-hour grocery.
When I got there, the guy was locking the front door.
I said, 'Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours.'
He said, 'Yes, but not in a row.'

< /Steven Wright Joke >

2003-04-28 02:53:37 PM  
haha busted. I hate lawyers. Except the ones that defend me.
Which pretty much means I hate all lawyers.
2003-04-28 02:53:41 PM  
..the sprint car crash..
A 74 year old guy and his wife bought the farm..
Probably died doing something they enjoyed at least..
2003-04-28 02:54:11 PM  
Bark_atda_moon: Prostitutes don't have to go to prostitute school, which costs money.
2003-04-28 02:54:44 PM  
Old Billy was right; kill them all.

Apologies to any Farker leaches. Its not personal; you just have to die.
2003-04-28 02:55:44 PM  

I actually used that one for real back at university. We went to grab steaks and snacks around 6pm on a Sunday-and the place had the huge sign with "Open 24 Hours". My roommate pointed to it when he questioned the manager who was locking up and refusing us entry.

He didn't seem to pleased when I said the 'not in a row' bit.

What a grumpy asshat. Enjoy your $6.95 per hour....
2003-04-28 02:56:04 PM  
You mean prostitutes are untrained?!
2003-04-28 02:56:51 PM  
What if it really was a misplaced decimal point?
2003-04-28 02:57:29 PM  

I'm a lawyer, and $140 is a below average hourly fee. Of course, I'm a new lawyer, clerking for a Judge, so I don't get to charge anything yet.
2003-04-28 02:57:49 PM  
At least he returned the money
2003-04-28 02:57:58 PM  
damn crooks
2003-04-28 02:58:06 PM  
It's all about the value to the client. So even though it's phrased in units of time, it can be billed according to the value. For instance, if you win a multi-million dollar case on a no-evidence motion for summary judgment that took five minutes to cut and paste from a form book, you can bill for what it was worth to the client.

The key is to get that arrangemnent in writing, of course. And to keep your clients happy. Nothing like a pissed off client to make you lose sleep.
2003-04-28 02:58:14 PM  
Funny, I don't see any problem. That's the way my law school professors would have added it up.

2003-04-28 02:58:24 PM  
"Van Rensler, who charges $140 an hour, said the questionable billings were caused by misplaced ethics."
2003-04-28 02:58:26 PM  
It depends on what your definition of "was" was.
2003-04-28 02:58:48 PM  
I don't understand why people hate lawyers...they seem nice enough to me.
2003-04-28 02:58:55 PM  
My mom is a paralegal, and her previous firm billed upwards of $75 an hour just for her!
2003-04-28 02:59:10 PM  
I hear the bills during leap year are a real biatch as well.
2003-04-28 02:59:48 PM  
I'm using "was" in the sense of the past tense of "to be." ;-)
2003-04-28 03:01:04 PM  

Prostitutes go to school too! Usually they are liberal arts majors.... but ohh well
2003-04-28 03:01:08 PM  
funny how the 'innocent' mistakes all happened to err in his favor :/
2003-04-28 03:01:23 PM  
Joke: Lawyer dies and goes to Heaven, theres this huuuge reception party for him. He asks why all the fuss as he thought he lived a pretty ordinary life. St Peter tells him its because he was the oldest man that ever lived. Now hes puzzled, and asks why they think that. "Easy, we added up all the time you billed"

2003-04-28 03:01:43 PM  
[image from springside.net too old to be available]
Brain cloud!
2003-04-28 03:02:09 PM  
He should sue himself for the error. It's the American way!
2003-04-28 03:02:35 PM  
A misplaced decimal is minor compared to a overdue period.
2003-04-28 03:03:48 PM  
GrymReeper (part 2)
Although if you take "was" to be the German word for "what," and "it" to mean "IT," and "point" to mean "point," I guess you'd have a really farked up sentence...
2003-04-28 03:04:13 PM  
Hey Craphola,

I realize there is a lot of $$$ to be made as a lawyer, but if what they say is true (More lawyers in school than there are practicing), when will the bubble burst? I am in the IT field and our bubble burst last year (feel free to argue) and was wondering if you guys/gals are hurting for work.
2003-04-28 03:04:29 PM  
Come on people, 25 is too much, and 23 means we're lazy. Now 81, that's nothing more than a beautiful dream.
2003-04-28 03:05:09 PM  
He CHARGES 140 an hour. That doesn't go all directly to him. You got pay staff, and court fees and al... I know it's still good money, but don't let that figure fool you.
2003-04-28 03:06:30 PM  
Bark Bubble has burst for lots of lawyers who are in the wrong area of law. For example, when the economy is down, corporate lawyers get shafted, because so many companies can't afford the bills. However, until people stop being sue-happy, litigators will always be busy.
2003-04-28 03:07:13 PM  
bar atda moon: The bubble will burst if the economy improves. When times are rough, everybody sues, and we need more lawyers.

/here's to GUlf War three!
2003-04-28 03:07:15 PM  
Now assuming it really was a misplaced decimal point, what the hell is up with 8.1 hours?! I mean, do lawyers really round to the nearest 6 minutes??? Craphola? LawTalkingGuy? Anyone?!
2003-04-28 03:07:20 PM  

Quit spoiling all our fun with your "reality".

2003-04-28 03:10:19 PM  
Thanks LawTalkingGuy and KPar90
(somehow I understand even though you guys said opposite things)
2003-04-28 03:10:53 PM  
Wuzzup: Many times, especially with nit-picky insurance companies. But here's the problem they create for themselves: reviewing and e-mail (billable if it's about a case) often takes a few seconds. So you bill for .1 "review..., or Communicate regarding..." and you can bill .1 for 50 e-mails in the time it takes for 6 minutes to actually pass. So in that 6 minutes you can bill for at least an hour of "work."

And now you know how Kpar gets to Fark at work. Although I don't do insurance work, some of our clients require this type of billing while sending mass e-mails from dozens of people about dozens of cases.
2003-04-28 03:11:09 PM  
Wuzupperson Depends on the firm, depends on the billing schedule agreed to by the client, but yeah, a lot of places bill to the closest .1 and round up. Used to be lawyers would make a 5 minute phone call and bill a half hour or an hour. Now it's a .1 so it actually saves money for the client in the long run.
2003-04-28 03:12:14 PM  
"Dammit Jim, I'm a lawyer not an accountant."
2003-04-28 03:12:35 PM  
Yes. Lawyers really bill in 6 minute incriments. Works out nicely, it's 1/10 of an hour.
2003-04-28 03:12:56 PM  
Bark atda moon: My post was more along the lines of a lawyer's joke. Law Talking's post is closer to economic reality.
2003-04-28 03:13:03 PM  
The First Thing We do, Let's Kill All the Lawyers. The Second Thing we Do.. is hire decent new, young and aspiring legal council at fair and economical prices. The third thing we do is not listen to any of the representation we just hired as they have been influenced by The First Thing we Do.. so we kill them too..

Damned Chaos Theory..
2003-04-28 03:13:40 PM  
Although I see we continue to take different approaches to billing...
2003-04-28 03:13:44 PM  
I'm in law school. One prof decided to be nice enough to alert us to all stories like this. This one firm had a partner commit suicide. The other partners had to go to his house looking for him. Well, they discovered his body, and had to call the police, yadda, yadda, and eventually attend the funeral.

They charged the dead guy's mother full hourly rate for the time spent discovering the body, calling the police, giving statements and attending the funeral. Since it was like a dozen partners doing all this (and partners' time is expensive), the bill ended up being over $35,000.
2003-04-28 03:14:47 PM  
OK, I'll call shenanigans on that one, Heeyuck.
2003-04-28 03:15:01 PM  
KPar heh. I'm still learning all the nuances.
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