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(Local6)   Buffalo kills caretaker at petting zoo   ( divider line
    More: Weird  
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5588 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Apr 2003 at 11:49 AM (14 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

59 Comments     (+0 »)

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2003-04-26 08:23:27 AM  
"It's not clear why the buffalo attacked the caretaker. "

WTF! What other lethal animals does this petting zoo have? Cobras? Grizzlies?
2003-04-26 11:53:10 AM  
See, I thought the headline was referring to the municipal government of the city in western New York.

I know the petting zoo sucks but that's harsh!
2003-04-26 11:53:11 AM  
Tatanka, Tatanka...

/obsecure movie quote
2003-04-26 11:56:10 AM  
Tatanka, Tatanka...

/obsecure WWE quote
2003-04-26 11:58:15 AM  
Ooooh, killer buffalo.

All we need to do is set up a PETA funded and maintained zoo of these beasties so we can sit back and watch hilarity ensue.
2003-04-26 11:58:43 AM  
Bet you they will shoot the damn thing.
2003-04-26 11:58:49 AM  
Buffalo steaks are great...I may have one of those this afternoon.
2003-04-26 12:00:57 PM  
What did the caretaker do to the poor thingy? Sexual abuse perhaps?
2003-04-26 12:01:15 PM  
The buffalo was just trying to give a little petting back.. s'not his fault he weighs more than a car and has horns on his head.
2003-04-26 12:02:23 PM  
hey, that looked like a bison to me...
2003-04-26 12:04:12 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
HA - ha!

2003-04-26 12:05:17 PM  
So it begins...And only thissalty seadog knows how to stop th.....AAAAARRGHH!
2003-04-26 12:05:52 PM  
Oh, he's such a nice buffalo, look, he eats rice krispies right out of your hand..this morning I went to see Ms. Buffalo, you see it's time for them to make babies...stop it, stop licking me...Mphhhh...*squish*
2003-04-26 12:07:48 PM  
In all seriousness, I hope to god there weren't any kids around to see this happen since the article mentions that the attack took place around three in the afternoon.
2003-04-26 12:12:35 PM  
Thats not a bison - THIS is a bison:

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-26 12:12:38 PM  
Note to self: When building my petting zoo, NO BISON.

Who the F pets a buffalo?

2003-04-26 12:15:04 PM  
Oh the irony.
2003-04-26 12:16:15 PM  
It's gonna cost ya....

[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-26 12:16:43 PM  
Wow!!! What a great article. Well researched and well writen. I can now see why I don't have a job as a journalist. I hope that guy doesn't get paid by the letter. This could have been a really good story. I would have really like to have seen pictures of the corpse. I wonder if a buffalo in a petting zoo would be more tender due repaeted petting. Ummmm, petting zoo buffalo. Sign me up for the tenderloin!
2003-04-26 12:19:33 PM  
mmmmmmmmmm, Buffalo
2003-04-26 12:23:04 PM  
40 seconds?? but i want it now!

/hold for applause
2003-04-26 12:23:34 PM  
WTF do these people expect...."Hey lets go out and pet an ill tempered easy to annoy 3 ton animal. "
2003-04-26 12:24:41 PM  
They like thier tummies scratched.
2003-04-26 12:25:07 PM  
Hey I been there!. I love when I get a zero degree of seperation from fark stories...

(and why didnt they use a san antonio news source? not that we actually have any that dont suck badly)
2003-04-26 12:28:27 PM  
There is "a rat" in separate.

/Spelling lesson for the day
2003-04-26 12:31:06 PM  
Here's another article that has a tad more info, and from a local source to boot.
2003-04-26 12:32:50 PM  
St. Peter: So, how did you die?
Caretaker: A bison killed me, sir.
St. Peter: Look, if you are embarrassed, I understand. You dont have to make things up. Now how did you REALLY die?
2003-04-26 12:39:10 PM  
clippity clop........pittery pat....i never new death could sound like that....
2003-04-26 12:43:08 PM  
Where's Gary Larson when you need him?

Oh no, that was a scorpion petting zoo.
2003-04-26 12:48:23 PM  
They hate it when you rub their fur the wrong way.
2003-04-26 12:51:58 PM  
loves Dances With Wolves
2003-04-26 12:56:07 PM  
Ya' know, "Petting Zoo Bison" would be a great name for a rock band/rock album
2003-04-26 01:00:42 PM  
Here's a better story from the local station

And the buffalo's name was Buffy
2003-04-26 01:03:17 PM  
Buffalo sucks
[/80's Dolphins fan]
2003-04-26 01:06:56 PM  
Dolphins suck
[buffalonian for life]
2003-04-26 01:17:13 PM  
I've been to a place similar to that.. i was like 8... i was petting the buffalo... i started pulling his hair to get some buffalo hair(i was 8)the buffalo freaks out and breaks off a window and a car door handle. Weerd.
2003-04-26 01:36:05 PM  
SAN ANTONIO -- A buffalo killed a caretaker at a petting zoo Friday in southwest Bexar County.

Bexar County sheriff's officials said the attack happened at 3 p.m. at a petting zoo at Rachel's Country Corner in the 8700 block of Old Pearsall Road.

It's not clear why the buffalo attacked the caretaker.

The victim's identity has not been released.

Who - not released
What - killer buffalo
Where - Rachel's Country Corner
When - 3.00pm
Why - nobody knows

Now that's efficient journalism
2003-04-26 01:37:58 PM  
Would it be insensitive to say "Spic on a Stick" ?
2003-04-26 01:42:07 PM  
dinner served?
2003-04-26 01:46:38 PM  
excellent! spelling lessons from a kakopygian*.

*i apologize if you are, in fact, a kakopygian. It was my point to use a large uncommon word in exchange for the spelling lesson
2003-04-26 01:51:21 PM  
I heard about a similar "shark petting zoo" accident about a month ago involving a 2-year-old. Anybody have details on that?

Next, it will be the "Siberial tiger petting zoo", and for females only, the "Bill Clinton petting zoo".
2003-04-26 01:52:53 PM  
I always wanted a rabid ferret petting zoo, well it would be more like a pit. That way I could toss in small annoying children, and laugh like a horny Japanese school-girl as I listen to their agonizing screams for mercy.
*orgasmic shudder*

2003-04-26 01:59:05 PM  
kakopygian? ...Ugly ass? Large ass?

something butt, I'm sure
2003-04-26 02:06:16 PM  
A male buffalo named Buffy? I'd be pissed to

As for what to do with him? Buffalo Burgers 90% Fat Free
2003-04-26 02:07:50 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-26 02:12:50 PM  
"Buffalo steaks are great...I may have one of those this afternoon."

I'll second that. There's a local outfit that makes excellent buffalo salami and sausage. Man, I'm going to miss living in Montana.
2003-04-26 02:42:03 PM  
So what is BuffaloMans super power?

Feeding greedy white settlers?

Or, Losing the SuperBowl 4 years in a row?
[image from too old to be available]
2003-04-26 03:38:47 PM  
Ok, for those keeping score at home.

Humans 10,000,000
Buffalo 1
2003-04-26 04:06:33 PM  
Of course, he didn't use all of the caretaker as did his buffalo ancestors... he merely took what he needed and left the human to rot on the petting zoo floor.

His father, with a tear in his eye remembers when caretakers once roamed the plains, free, wild and strong.
2003-04-26 04:27:24 PM  
"Feeding greedy white settlers?"

Silly farker, the settlers didn't EAT the buffalo they slaughtered :)>
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