Last week I attended the TED conference for the first time. I was kind of dubious about it, I don't have a lot of luck at conferences -- it seems that most of them are full of douchebags. It seemed even more likely that TED would be full of douchebags since the context of the conference seems to be "save the world", a sanctimonious goal if there ever was one.

I was surprised to discover that there weren't so many douchebags there. In fact, everyone I met was really nice, and I was able to catch up with a ton of folks that I'd been trying to grab a beer with forever, including Jay Adelson (Digg), Phillip "Pud" Kaplan (F*cked Company & others), moot (4chan), and Arianna Huffington (HuffPo), among others. I even inadvertently asked Bill Gates if the seat next to him was taken; he was saving it for his wife. Didn't realize it was him until two days later.

It's one thing to have a conference where the subtext is "save the world," but it's another thing entirely to have people there who can actually do it. By far my favorite talk was about Nathan Myhrvold's new mosquito laser built out of parts found on eBay. Pretty amazing stuff, although my first reaction was that this probably has some obvious military applications -- such as parking one in geostationary orbit over Iran and setting it to kill anyone with a mustache. Seems like I saw this movie before, Val Kilmer was in it.


Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2010-02-07 to Sat 2010-02-13:

  "Sheen Remains Weeks After Port Arthur Oil Spill." I bet he'd go away if they offered him some hookers and coke    

  Georgia man arrested with $1.6 billion in phony Treasury notes. Authorities became suspicious upon learning that the man's name wasn't China    

  Overweight men have higher chance of surviving a car crash. That's how we roll    

  Woman wins $15K in botched bikini wax lawsuit. I don't think she'll get ripped off again    

  Original Haitian death toll of 270,000 has now been revised to 170,000, meaning that 100,000 people are no...longer...dead...OH CRAP    

  Beet juice mix helps melt ice. Beet juice mix helps melt ice. Beet juice mix helps melt ice    

  Nelson Mandela was released from prison 20 years ago today, hasn't reoffended    

  "Officers say they've had two meth seizures within five days of each other." They better go easy on that stuff    

  Woman injured after getting hit by a cinder truck. Why couldn't it have been something softer like a pillow truck or a marshmallow truck?    

  Staff employees in Maricopa County, Arizona have been caught speeding on photo radar cameras more than 1,500 times over the last two years, marking the first time in history a government worker has done something fast    

  Probe launched into Mianus fire blamed on hot ashes, spicy food    

Sports:

  Vick no longer complacent, realizes that competitive sports is a something-of-one-type eat something-of-the-same-type world    

  Nancy Kerrigan lands new gig as a reporter for the 2010 Winter Olympics. WHY HER? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?    

  NASCAR begins its boring sport toda...Wait what? Danica Patrick was in a 12-car accident? Is she okay? Was her racing suit torn off at all?    

Geek:

  Rebuilt DNA Could Lead to Cloned Neanderthals, Higher Ratings for WWE    

  Starcraft 2 beta to be released this month. Kekekekeke nerd rush ^_^    

  Europe's LHC to run at half-energy, tightening race for Higgs. In related news, scientists across Europe have begun stockpiling crossbows    

Showbiz:

  Heather Mills wants to produce a TV show about people with disabilities. Guess she hasn't heard Jersey Shore's coming back for a second season    

  "I do not believe in totally natural for women" says Donatella Versace, who looks like a cross between Iggy Pop and a leather purse left out in the sun    

  Lady Gaga is dating her best friend. She says that it was very nice to meat him    

Politics:

  Although she lives in a state that allows gay marriage, TV pundit Rachel Maddow says she and her girlfriend don't want to get married, but like having the option of putting the Subaru in both their names if they want    

  Bill Clinton rushed to NY hospital with heart problem. Details, updates, Clinton expected to come soon    

  Poll shows that 70% of Americans support gays and lesbians in the military. However, only 59% support homosexuals in the military. Non-homosexual gay and lesbian soldiers rejoice    

Music:

  White Stripes upset at Air Force Reserve for stealing one of their songs. They say they recognized it because the drums sounded like a monkey trapped in a snare    

  Moby says he is using "no electronic instruments" on his new album, which means you'll be lulled to sleep by real instruments    

  Limp Bizkit's Wes Borland says that their new album is inspired by Daft Punk. In related news, Daft Punk to sue Limp Bizkit for defamation of character    

Business:

  Former Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan emerges from his hole and predicts six more years of high unemployment    

  Philip Morris profit tops estimates, plans to boost health through the intake of second hand stock    

  MySpace CEO Van Natta quits after just nine months, which is pretty much what most MySpace users did four years ago