Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Weekly World News)   U.S. cash so contaminated with cocaine, heroin and ecstasy that the latest drug craze has become sniffing paper bills to get cheap high   ( divider line
    More: Obvious  
•       •       •

81 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Apr 2003 at 3:22 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

104 Comments     (+0 »)

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

2003-04-14 10:22:13 AM  
Sort of based on fact - there is a trace ammount of coke in bills - though sadly (?) not nearly enough to get high on. No idea about heroin and ecstasy, but I'm sure there's at least some there.
As always, you can check Snopes for more information.
2003-04-14 10:53:29 AM  
Scratch n' sniff cash -- mmm, mine's minty X!

Collect 'em all!
2003-04-14 11:07:34 AM  
If you soak the dollars in grain alcohol and then you boil (carefully) the solution and roll the residue into bars, you'll end up with cocaine-flavored hash.

Not really. Actually you'll end up with a lot of McDonalds french-fry grease.
2003-04-14 12:27:55 PM  
At least cash is legal. For now.
2003-04-14 01:00:44 PM  
I thought it was all about the Benjamins, Sniff Daddy.
2003-04-14 01:27:28 PM  
The statistic I heard a few years ago is that the average dollar bill contains 4-6 nanograms (one billionth of a gram) of cocaine.

If you had enough cocaine from that to get high from, I don't think you'll have to worry about getting your next fix anyways.
2003-04-14 02:37:18 PM  
Oh sure. Uh huh. Riiiiiiiiiight.
2003-04-14 03:24:44 PM  
I just tried this. I'm not high and I think I've got SARS now.
2003-04-14 03:26:45 PM  
Get out of the thread JerseyTim!!! You're gonna kill us all!!

*panicks and runs out of thread, stampeading several farkers to death*
2003-04-14 03:27:10 PM  
Sounds more like a good way to catch a disease.

JerseyTim: You're not supposed to sniff the ones from the toll collectors on the Turnpike. Nasty stuff!
2003-04-14 03:27:41 PM  
So that's why I get all giddy with a wad of bills at CompUSA. ;)
2003-04-14 03:28:02 PM  
"Shockingly, teens as young as 13 have been caught dead-presidenting at school, typically sniffing $1 and $5 bills."

Hehe, dead-presidenting.
2003-04-14 03:28:24 PM  
Just enough drugs on money to give the cops an excuse to seize it.
2003-04-14 03:28:42 PM  
This is the closest thing to factual reporting I've ever seen from WWN. Is the apocalypse nigh?
2003-04-14 03:28:45 PM  
I only sniff $100 bills because I like more expensive drugs.
2003-04-14 03:28:49 PM  
Anyone have change for a twenty?
2003-04-14 03:29:18 PM  
Have you guys tried the 2$ bills there the shizzznitle blam
2003-04-14 03:29:18 PM  
CandyPants just knocked me down...
2003-04-14 03:29:58 PM  
I hit rock bottom...I was addicted to sniffing bills. Now, all I have is this HUGE pile of cash with no drugs on it. Now what do I do??
2003-04-14 03:30:36 PM  
Best use of the Obvious tag ever
2003-04-14 03:30:53 PM  
NO!! CANDYPANTS!!! LOOK OU mmnnppphhhttthm,m ack ack
2003-04-14 03:31:27 PM  
so does this mean the druggies will have to steal in order to buy money to support their habit?

"I need some bad man...give me a 20 dollar bill"
"That'll be $50"

thats weird.
2003-04-14 03:31:42 PM  
2003-04-14 03:31:45 PM  
Personally, I like to roll 50's and smoke 'em.
2003-04-14 03:33:53 PM  
Oh,shiat,JerseyTim sneezed. We've all got it now.
2003-04-14 03:33:56 PM  
i just put two dimes up my nose and now i feel dizzy, so this might be true........
2003-04-14 03:33:59 PM  
Using a 20 to mainline heroin is hard.

/just saying
2003-04-14 03:34:02 PM  
If have money to sniff, why not use it to buy drugs???
2003-04-14 03:34:16 PM  

Wish this wasn't from the Weakly Wierd News. Then it might actually be true.
2003-04-14 03:34:20 PM  
lemme tell ya. Snorting *E would taste so bad that you would be cured of dead presidenting in a split second...
2003-04-14 03:34:42 PM  
is it me or does that one dude look like Corey Haim.. or however you spell his last name?
2003-04-14 03:36:07 PM  
Glad I met my demise at the feet of Candypants rather than the nostril butter of Jersey Tim.
2003-04-14 03:37:29 PM  

S'bitter, but it is not terrible. just bad.

It's the stupid "WE"RE OUT OF MILK!?!?! AUUuuuuggghhhhhH!!!! Anguish" that cured me of the E.
2003-04-14 03:37:40 PM  
i heard if you put a tab of acid on your eye you start tripping your nuts off instantly. or go blind. one or the other....
2003-04-14 03:38:07 PM  
We had a very similar technique for getting a buzz at that age, but we called it "hyperventilating."
2003-04-14 03:39:26 PM  
Dead presidenting sounds really bad. Now LOOTING sounds like a much better name for this!
2003-04-14 03:39:47 PM  
Saddam bragged that he "wipes his ass with US currency"
You sure you still want to snort it?
2003-04-14 03:40:05 PM  
Can't we just ban stuff the WWN? It's hard enough sorting through some of the crap here without it being delibrately junked up.
2003-04-14 03:40:56 PM  
Nanookanano hmm, in high school we had something similar. They were called hill sprints...those days caused all sorts of fun, light headedness, seeing flashing lights, lots of fun endorphins and painkillers.

Certainly seems like a hell of a lot better way to fry your brain than huffing paint.
2003-04-14 03:41:54 PM  
In an effort to show their readers that money contains traces of different drugs, today High Times rolled out their new magazine format and masthead:

[image from too old to be available]

2003-04-14 03:44:27 PM  
What's in our money is germs. Someone post the stats of how much TB and harmful viruses bills contain. Don't put that up your nose.
2003-04-14 03:45:22 PM  
If there's anything worst than a tabloid, it's a conservative tabloid. WWN is always going on about how the bible is pure fact and how America is the good guy. WWN is also America's version of Baghdad Bob: They've written that Osama is a goat-f*cker and Saddam is a cross-dressing queer. And here's what really get's me pissed: They've always wrote stories about conspiracy theories with more or less impartibility but once they are told about conspiracy theories about how the US might have been behind 9/11, they outright call the accusers flipping nutcases. "Flipping Nutcases"? That insult comes from people who think there's oil on the moon! Hey WWN, TAKE BUSH'S PENIS OUT OF YOUR MOUTH ALREADY!
2003-04-14 03:48:39 PM  
And actually, with how stupid kids are today (well, the ones trying to get high off of shiat) this isn't so farfetched. I think drug culture went downhill with the rise in popularity of crack. That led to speed and meth, and suddenly people didn't give a shiat about any quality control in drugs.

The end result is that you have kids who are stupid enough to burn duct tape to get "high"...which probably isn't all that much more toxic than some of the mainstream drugs they would be buying.
2003-04-14 03:49:53 PM  
Ugh....snorting $20's???

Don't they know that they only way to do coke is to snort it thru a cool hun'???
2003-04-14 03:53:25 PM  
When did Ann Coulter start writing for the Weekly World News?
2003-04-14 03:53:32 PM  
Actually Sidi speed was around long before crack. Ever heard of a yellowjacket?? White crosses?? in the 70's were popping pills way before crack was just a glimmer in a junkies eyes.
2003-04-14 03:53:40 PM  
2003-04-14 03:54:22 PM  
Dammit, I just tried this, and I accidently snorted a dime up my nose, now I can't get it out. I'm picking, but to no avail!
2003-04-14 03:54:24 PM  
Ever seen what strippers do with dollar bills (besides buy crank)? I think I'll pass on the licking.
2003-04-14 03:54:55 PM  
RoguePixie I was referring to popularity. Obviously amphetamines have been around forever, but I don't think speed became a hugely popular drug until well into the 80's.
Displayed 50 of 104 comments

Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.