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(Canada.com)   Court won't let homebuyers back out after discovering there's nude beach next door   ( canada.com) divider line
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51 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Apr 2003 at 11:23 AM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2003-04-02 10:49:51 AM  
I'm no prude but I would want to be told that I was moving next to a nude beach. If this beach is anything like the clothing optional swimming holes here in Texas, then it's surrounded by many creepy dudes pleasuring themselves in the bushes. It's relly no place to raise children.
But of course I would never buy a house without studying the entire neighborhood for a few weeks first.
2003-04-02 11:16:47 AM  
Nothing like waking up in the morning,walking out back and seeing some old guys wrinkled balls flapping around as he jogs down the beach. Now imagine it with a hangover.
2003-04-02 11:22:49 AM  
Just keep a bucket of white rice handy and gently sprinkle some on the exposed asses on the beach. Once these guys walk around with faux maggots stuck to their mudd flaps, it might keep them from coming back.

Just an idea.
2003-04-02 11:26:47 AM  
Sounds like a Seinfeld episode.
2003-04-02 11:27:28 AM  
DownSouth & Bump -- that's just so wrong. Ugh. $100,000 deposit on a house? What kind of neighborhood is that where deposits go for 100k and nude beaches are next door?
2003-04-02 11:27:46 AM  
the article said they had to forfeit 100K, I hope they get to keep the house for that!!!!
2003-04-02 11:28:27 AM  
Set up video cameras and time-lapse cameras and start a web site. You may not wanna see it but some other sucker will pay to see it.
2003-04-02 11:29:33 AM  
Nabob, now that's an idea. They'd probably make the $100G's back in no time!
2003-04-02 11:30:22 AM  
They could probably buy it, then sell it for more than they bought it for just off the publicity alone.

Location, location, location
2003-04-02 11:30:49 AM  
I just got back from the Dominican Republic and I saw some nude beaches. It's not cool when the 85 year old 300 pound lady wants to go on a walk.

*shakes with fear*
2003-04-02 11:31:01 AM  
The following comment is made without the experience of ever visiting a nude beach:

I hate to say it, but why look the gift-horse in the mouth? Get some tinted windows and you're all set... right?

Seeing the massive-mammoried babes from Canada, i think this makes Canada a big winner in my book today ... aside from them being faux-french and all.

Finally: Go Canada!
2003-04-02 11:31:06 AM  
And the real pisser is that there's a pub serving free beer next door.

These people are farkin' weird.
2003-04-02 11:31:34 AM  
Folks, believe it or don't... houses ar expensive in some parts of Canada.
2003-04-02 11:31:51 AM  
Heh. They're gonna be livin' by a lot of nekkid people. Heh, nekkid.

Besides, the nude human form is a beautiful thing, a wonder of nature. Unless it's a guy. Or an ugly chick.
2003-04-02 11:33:25 AM  
Picture the scene:

"Do de do do"
*Stretching and yawning in the morning*
*looks out the window with a cup of joe*
"SWEET GALLOPING JEEBUS, MYRTLE! Come here quick! Is that a beached Elephant seal?"
*Spewing coffee to the four winds*
*Examines the scene closer with the binoculars*
"Oh fer the love of Mike...Woman's got more chins than a Chinese phone book. Myrtle! Call the realtor, I want our money back!"
*Looks back to check how the frisbee game is working out further along the beach*
"I'm going to sit right here and keep an eye out to make sure none of these nudies wander on the property. Probably take all day. Just bring my lunch in here..."
2003-04-02 11:33:56 AM  
About the $100,000 deposit...
First of all, it's oceanfront property... BIG bucks
Second of all, this is Canada we're talking about... that's probably... $10 in real money?
2003-04-02 11:34:31 AM  
Sadly, Bobbyomatic, reading the previous posts, nude beaches only seem popular by the ugly. (Except maybe FL beaches, during spring break, I don't know I've never been to one either).
2003-04-02 11:34:33 AM  
Shreen - Kelowna has gone from a retirement community to a very wealthy community. Very Napa Valley - lots of folks cashed in their equity in the Vancouver market and moved there in the late 80's - 90's, so buying a house there is like buying a house in Silicon Valley. I knew a Dr. that moved from Vancouver to Kelowna. Bought a huge house for less than half the price of his Vancouver one, the drive to work is 10 minutes on a bad day, blah blah. But I never knew there was a nudie beach on Ok. Lake. Dang, things are looking up.
2003-04-02 11:34:56 AM  
2003-04-02 11:36:02 AM  
In the words of the immortal (but dead in real life) Mike Brady "caveat emptor."
2003-04-02 11:36:47 AM  
But a judge ruled the presence of parading nudes in front of one's house may or may not be a defect, calling it a subjective decision.

Isn't that what the judge is supposed to judge? If the judge says it's subjective, then who's decision is it to call it one or the other? Sheesh, I'd call it a defect.
2003-04-02 11:37:22 AM  
Ya take the good with the bad ... speaking of which, anybody know how where I can get a Swedish Au Pair Girl?
2003-04-02 11:38:10 AM  
That's what I'm talking about Nabob. Make a profit off of it, and do it in an obvious fashion. Even if the people you film are disgustingly hideous and resemble Alien life-forms.
Because you know they are. Even in uninhibited Canada, people frequenting nude beaches are not the people that foolish Maxim-reading guys think.....i.e. Playboy models and willing vixens who think casual-sex orgies with strangers they met ten minutes ago is the most exciting thing ever. They are wrinkled bloated fleshbags with more stretch-marks than sauerbraten who have no problem scratching/fondling/pleasuring themselves in public. Gross. FILM IT ANYWAY AND MAKE THE DOLLARS.
2003-04-02 11:40:09 AM  
First of all, it's oceanfront property... BIG bucks

Uh...Kelowna is about 1000 miles from the ocean. But, whatever.

It is a rather pretty resort town on Lake Okanogan, and extremely expensive. Last I heard, Arnold Schwartzenegger has a house in that area, but that could be a myth.

Furthermore, whether it's a nude beach or a toxic waste dump, you hvae the right to know what is next door to your house.
2003-04-02 11:40:59 AM  
Are you farking kidding me??? How many days a year could it possibly be warm enough to go nude in Canada?
2003-04-02 11:40:59 AM  
Psst! -- Check out the caveat emptors on that babe!
2003-04-02 11:41:02 AM  
While the website may seem like a good idea, you'd have to monitor for every time a 12 year old walked into view and shut it off.
Might not be worth the hassle.
2003-04-02 11:41:38 AM  
Since when does Canada have beaches?
2003-04-02 11:41:56 AM  
Sounds to me like the judge passed the ol' buck. I mean, metaphorically speaking.
2003-04-02 11:42:12 AM  

"...more chins than a Chinese phone book..."

2003-04-02 11:43:23 AM  
Stebain: not if he broadcast to Italy and Japan. I understand that type of thing is encouraged there. Preverts.
2003-04-02 11:44:09 AM  
Canada has about 60 warm days. We savior each and every one of them...
2003-04-02 11:44:46 AM  
I wonder how the guy managed to pull this one over on his wife? This kinda thing only happens in sitcoms.
2003-04-02 11:44:54 AM  
This would quickly turn into a gay beach and be shunned by the good looking people. At least in the US.

On another note, Maggie's cans are bigger than the girl standing next to he rin that SbB photo. I'd love to slide between those puppies.
2003-04-02 11:44:58 AM  
"savior"? Wow, you really do appreciate a nice warm day.
2003-04-02 11:45:12 AM  
Simpson's relevant quote time

Match the character by putting a pic
Difficulty EASY

"...some counselors won't dig the Bart style, but I think the human body is a thing of beauty."

"Marge is it just me or is my back getting hairier?"

What episode people?
2003-04-02 11:45:16 AM  
In Florida there are 60 warm days a month>
2003-04-02 11:47:44 AM  
CatchrNdRy: No idea. But did you ever see Drew Carey's stand up comedy act where he thought that the pimples on his face would go away when he got older, but they just got older, retired, and moved south to his ass for the winter, planting hair all the way. Funny stuff.
2003-04-02 11:48:17 AM  
Didn't read the article...
Didn't read the comment postings...

How many Farkers have expressed a desire to buy the property from them?
2003-04-02 11:49:13 AM  
Do you blame them? Who would want to see this everyday?

[image from im1.shutterfly.com too old to be available]
2003-04-02 11:49:46 AM  

Kamp Krusty
2003-04-02 11:50:36 AM  
$100,000 deposit

What is that? $3.76US
2003-04-02 11:51:20 AM  
Do you blame them? Who would want to see this everyday?

[image from im1.shutterfly.com too old to be available]
2003-04-02 11:51:36 AM  
Well, I have been looking for a new house......... although I'm not sure I want to 'cut glass' while frolicking along the beach. I can't imagine it would be too kind to the male persuasion either
2003-04-02 11:51:54 AM  
JackHandy: It's beautiful down here,isn't it?

*hiding in the bushes around Paradise Lakes*
2003-04-02 11:52:20 AM  
How did the buyers miss this?

I mean I don't ordinarly drop a deposit on my dry cleaning without at least looking around, for God's sake!

They deserve to lose their money if they pull the trigger on a larger purchase that stupidly.
2003-04-02 11:52:35 AM  
Jack ... a month? math dude, study it.
2003-04-02 11:52:35 AM  
Depending on the beachgoers' sexual orientation, but I think I might want to back out, too. While clenching.
2003-04-02 11:52:40 AM  
But a judge ruled the presence of parading nudes in front of one's house may or may not be a defect, calling it a subjective decision.

The nudes may or may not be a defect depending on how pretty they are.

Seriously though, what kind of moron puts 100k down on a house without first finding out what is in the immediate neighborhood. Its not like it was a secret nude beach that no one knew about.

Conclusion: people are stupid, animals are smart. You never see monkeys making that type of mistake.
2003-04-02 11:52:41 AM  
When I was younger, I wanted to be in good physical shape.

When I got a little older, I just wanted to be in good cardiovascular shape.

Now, I just don't want to have tits...

/Dom Irrera
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